


The Iron "Princess"

by WinterMunchkin05



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Has A Crush, I stand corrected this ain't crack, IN THIS HOUSE INFINITY WAR AND ENDGAME ARE NOT RESPECTED, It's ME who is on crack, Jealousy, M/M, Oblivious Tony Stark, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), READ THE TAGS AND HEED THE WARNINGS, Rhodey is an over-protective older brother, Run Bucky, Tony doesnt want you near Rogers, Winter Soldier tryna be smooth, Y'ALL CAN AVOID THIS IF YOU ARE ON TEAM CAP, and the internet lives for it, but only ends in freaking Tony out, crack treated almost seriously, misunderstandings galore, not team Cap friendly, shoo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2020-11-23 08:38:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 86,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20889254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterMunchkin05/pseuds/WinterMunchkin05
Summary: In which the Winter Soldier drops a princess reference on Tony and the internet runs away with it.





	1. Once upon a time

**Author's Note:**

> This thing seriously just hit me out of nowhere. I've barely began with my other story and I'm already starting a new one. But Bucky just won't stop yelling at me to do the princess thing it's nuts.

Tony could feel the onset of a headache when he spotted a familiar jet landing near theirs before the start of their mission. The Rogues (no, they were back to being Avengers now) were called in the field with them, _again_. The call was only for another two-bit villain with a few stolen Chitauri tech and a little knack for engineering that resulted in quite an army of robots that were deadset on destroying the city. They didn’t need the unwelcomed back up. The Spider-kid took down one like this all on his own a while back. That bastard even had goods leagues better than this one’s, for fuck’s sake! Their villain of the month only had more products than the kid’s previous nemesis was the only reason that they were called in as a whole. Seriously, would it kill some of the members of the Accords Council to avoid putting both their teams on the same mission? They could deny it all they want but those bastards at Capitol Hill were clearly still Captain America fanboys who think that rainbows came out of Rogers’s ass.

They had all but swept the ‘Civil War’ fiasco under the rug when Rogers finally caved in (a miracle in and of its own) and signed the Accords after months of back and forth with him and his crew when they all got the pardons and returned to the States. The Captain America shine wasn’t dimmed in any way after he went rogue and killed civilians as well as law enforcers in Bucharest when he destroyed that bridge to _save_ the love of his life. All of that because he couldn’t stand the idea of Barnes being held in a psych ward, evaluated and put under therapy before any trial for the crimes he committed as the Winter Soldier was levied against him.

Rogers was also obviously gunning for Tony being back in his ‘family’, with him requesting meeting after meeting with the billionaire through the council, but Rhodey shot him down before he could even have a leg to stand on. Now, there were two sets of Avengers—the Avengers and the New Avengers. There was Rogers and his little band of troublemakers plus the newly de-frozen Barnes on the former whilst Tony was in the latter with Hope, Vision, Spider-man while Rhodey and Carol lead.

Stephen joins them when they called, clearly preferring them to the Avengers. Although, Tony could chalk it up to the fact that Rogers obviously thought there wouldn’t be a need for the _fucking Sorcerer Supreme_ himself since he has his pet little witch thus, couldn’t be bothered with asking Stephen for help. _The moron_. Just because her powers were derived from an Infinity Stone it didn’t mean she was more powerful than someone who wields an _actual _Infinity Stone in addition to the latent mystic gift (okay, there’s that shudder now) awakened by his training in Kamar-Taj, and besides, it’s not like HYDRA was fully capable of training magic (ugh) users_. _Stephen rolled his eyes and snorted when Rhodey brought it up during a debrief saying he wouldn’t even be surprised if that was the case. Strange has never really bought into the aw shucks bullshit Rogers was peddling right from the get-go. That was most likely the only thing Tony would ever be envious of about Strange. He’d deny it to the end of his days when asked because Strange didn’t need any more boost to his ego. The asshole.

In addition to a powerful sorcerer, members of the New Avengers were heavy hitters on their own. Iron Man and War Machine each had more firepower than the all branches of the military combined, the Wasp had all things that made the Ant-man suit formidable multiplied to a thousand plus expertise in close combat, Vision wields an Infinity Stone, Spider-man could beat both the Winter Soldier and Captain America in terms of strength. _Captain Marvel_, for the love of all things holy, could definitely squash Iron Man, War Machine, the kid, Rogers and Barnes down all at the same time without breaking a sweat if she so wished. The Black Panther would have made an incredible addition to the team but, due to the fact that T’challa has a seat in the UN Accords Council as King of Wakanda, it would be a conflict of interest for him to be a permanent and active fighter in any team, especially a team that was based in US. The Accords created a different arrangement for him—placing the Black Panther in the reserved Avengers roster called only for the most extreme of missions like world-ending scenarios or cases that occur within the African continent. It made him a bit more of a free agent and enabled him to integrate himself into any team called into his territory—for the lack of a better word. Tony and his team also had better relations with other superhero teams, like the Defenders, which made any inter-team missions go smoothly. In all honesty, he was actually half-tempted to rename their team the _Better_ Avengers, if only it didn’t sound tacky and could possibly trigger Rogers’s superiority complex.

“Incoming.” Peter singsonged sarcastically over the comms as Rogers and his gang made their way over.

A collective sigh went over the comms at that. They already knew how this was going to go down. Rogers will be all over them, pushing his plans, messing shit up and razzing Tony after the mission about joining them later for “team activities”. Why Rogers kept on insisting that he should be with them, Tony for all his genius could not wrap his head around at all. Probably because they missed their _sugar daddy_, seemed like His Royal King Kittyness didn’t really pamper them enough in Wakanda. T’challa himself would rather not discuss whatever happened during the Rogue Avengers’ stay in his kingdom apart from Barnes and his treatment. Tony had to roll his eyes at the thought.

This mission was going to _suck_. Big time.

“Colonel.” Rogers greeted Rhodey before _politely_ nodding over Tony and the others, “everyone.”

“Captain.” Rhodey returned stiffly, though unnoticeable with his suit’s speaker, before lifting his faceplate, “what can we do for you?”

Rhodey, bless his soul, definitely made Mama Rhodes immensely proud—still had his manners even in the face of undesirable company. If only same could be said about aforementioned company.

“The Council gave us the green light when the intel showed that this guy actually had more robots in his arsenal than what your team got. The higher ups figured you could use the back up.” Captain Delusional replied as his gang stood behind him, with his _beloved _staying a bit far away from the entire group at the side.

Rogers was really upping the aura of “unassuming” with the slightly awkward-looking grin that made Tony want to blast it off his face with a fully charged repulsor, along with the miniscule quirk on Romanoff’s lips. Even though he was addressing Rhodey, Tony got the feeling that Rogers was actually talking to him, as if saying, _“We’re obviously the better team, Tony. You can still join us.”_

_This son of a bitch. _

_Apparently, he was now taking lessons in shadiness from Romanoff._

The rest of the New Avengers beside him though, could definitely see it for the backhanded offer that it was also meant to be. Vision, who wore a slight frown on his face, had to keep a discreet hand on Hope’s arm before she could take a step forward. Carol tensed quite a bit that her back was straighter than Rogers’s perfect teeth and her fists subtly crackled with energy while Underoos did a double take, his thoughts obvious even behind his mask.

The kid was a walking and talking encyclopedia of neon-signed, in all caps emotions that every little movement showed what was on his mind, one had to wonder how the hell he managed to keep his secret identity from the general public for this long. Tony felt like something in the cosmos was testing him because he truly wanted to know the science behind the kid’s seemingly never-ending _luck_ in the secret identity department.

In the name of Thor’s balls, he could tell he would fucking fail.

“Spider-man, can you go up that building over at our two o’ clock and get some details on our new friend?”

“Wha—“

“Now, Spider-kid.” He gave Peter a little tap and gently faced him in the direction of the building, “c’mon, I’ll catch up later.”

“It’s Spider-_MAN.”_ Peter mumbled before doing as he was asked, web-slinging to the buiding. Before he could get far though, he opened a private line between him and Tony, “Will you be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, I have everyone with me. We’re just going to have a bit of the usual pissing contest with these assholes then we’ll start the mission when you get back. After all this, you, Harley and me are going out for burgers then do science at the workshop. Sound good?”

“Yeah, okay!”

He just got off the private line when he heard Rogers address him.

“Tony, why would you send Spider-man on his own? It’s dangerous.”

Oh, there it was. The Captain America Frown of Disappointment.

All that was missing now were the other Captain America Gestures of Disapproval™—the Straight Back of ‘I’m Captain America, listen to me’ and the Jutted Chin of Bullheadedness—for Tony to be back in the good ol’ days.

He almost felt bad that he didn’t license those along with the other Avengers merchandise they had back then. They would have made a hell of profit with how much Rogers had them in production.

Nah, on second thought, the demand for them didn’t even exist to begin with. Rogers just liked handing them out like pineapple on pizzas—given but unwanted and utterly, unnecessary.

“Spider-man can take care of himself, Rogers. He may be young but he’s not an infant. He’s an Avenger and we will not be mollycoddling him.” He drawled, not even bothering to lift his own faceplate. He really just couldn’t help but feel petty whenever any of these assholes butt into his life in one way or another.

Captain America Gesture number two predictably made its appearance at his answer, “Tony, I’m not here to fight. I’m just saying that as elders you should be watching over him carefully.”

“And my answer stays the same. I believe in his abilities, being young doesn’t mean we have to hold his hand all the time and excuse every single mistake he did because he’s the youngest. Telling him none of it is his fault when instead, we can help him how to make up for or avoid them in the first place. That’s teaching _responsibility_, Rogers. Besides, surely you heard me tell him, I’ll catch up?”

With the way the Rogues—except for Barnes, utterly unreadable with half his face covered by his mask and watched with intense but impassive eyes that Tony had to look away when they slid onto him—tensed, he could tell they got his dig about their own_ youngster_.

_If Rogers wants to throw shade then he won’t be seeing sunlight any time soon._

“The fuck did you say?!” Barton snarled, stepping forward. Wilson and Lang had the wherewithal to keep Barton in check whilst Romanoff and Rogers had their attention on Maximoff, whose fingers were already bleeding with her own special brand of poison.

Both teams were at a standoff when Rhodey snapped, almost growled, pausing everyone in their tracks.

“Enough!”

War Machine stepped in the middle and turned to Rogers, “Captain, this is not the time for this. People are in danger and if we wasted more time on this we will surely lose lives on our watch.”

And voila, ladies and gentlemen, the trifecta of the Captain America Gestures of Disapproval™ was complete.

“I was about to say the same, Colonel.” Rogers replied almost curtly before turning to his team, “Avengers, assemble!”

With barely concealed eye rolls at the childish display of authority, the New Avengers all turned to Rhodey. The kid made it just in time for strategy.

“Alright, Spider-man. What do you have?”

“Well, Colonel. For some reason, this guy just seems to be waiting for us to show up. Not really doing anything, he has hostages though. According to Karen, there are people in the building behind him and his bots are keeping the people locked inside. A few floors occupied, the rest are surrounding the building. I went a little further than my original post—sorry, Mr. Stark—I found that he was also having his bots secure four more buildings in the corners surrounding him, same sitch. Karen, please send Mr. Stark and Colonel the footage please.”

He and Rhodey got the footage displayed in their HUD in a few seconds.

“Veni, vidi, vici.” Tony murmured as he looked over their villain’s set up, gathering confused looks from the others. “Okay. He’s not doing anything but he has hostages in different locations—probably expecting us to panic because we can’t fight through all his bots and reach the hostages quickly. He came here, he’s going to see us unable to go to all the locations where he’s holding the civilians, expecting us to all be distracted by the bots and the hostages while he defeats us one by one with the extra bots he has near him.”

“So…our run of the mill dumbass then, like _those guys_?” Hope sighed, putting on her helmet with that quick, graceful hand flick maneuver he couldn’t figure out for the life of him—no matter how many times he had seen it. She was _so done_ with their interlopers that she made a new art form of how ‘I’m so done.’ was done.

“Basically.”

“I’m seriously tempted to just ditch and leave this guy to Rogers and his ilk if not for the amount of people in the middle of this.” Carol almost groaned, “With Rogers in the lead, we can’t have that many people in the line of fire. It’s going to be a massacre. Whoever named that ass one of best tacticians of all time is an _utter idiot_. All his plans are just varied repetitions of ‘You, go be a distraction; the others, deal with the lackeys; I keep the main villain to myself’ with no regard for the civilians trapped in the middle. ” 

The disgust on her face was so glorious it was worthy of a place in the Louvré.

Damn, Rhodey bear, you lucky bastard.

“Alright, Iron Man and Spider-man, we’ll have you on civilians. Wasp and Vision are the only ones that can get inside the buildings quickly without getting noticed. Viz, phase through the buildings, starting from the right at the back working to the center. From the scans Karen did, the buildings at the far corners are where our villain’s link to the bots is at its weakest and destroy the bots inside, guide the civilians to the nearest exits away from the fights. Wasp, go the opposite way and start from the front left. Iron Man, go with the Wasp and Spider-man with Vision; make sure to destroy the stragglers or draw them to the middle away from the civilians. Iron Man, have the local authorities near the areas for back up evacuations. Captain Marvel will clear the path up front in the middle while I go hit it from the back—“

A snort escaped Tony as he laughed at the unintentional innuendo, “Of course, you’ll_ hit it from the back_, Honey bear.”

“Not the time, Tony.” Rhodey groused as both Carol and Hope chuckled while Vision and Peter just shook their heads at their elders’ antics.

“How about Captain Rogers and his team?” Vision segued to another pressing matter.

Oh yeah_, that_.

“I’ll send a message to Rogers, he better work with our strategy since this is _our_ mission—they’re just back up.” Rhodey replied, his faceplate going down to cover his face.

It’s show time.

* * *

What was that he said earlier? Ah, that’s right. This mission was going to suck. He truly wished it was the Defenders with them, those guys were all kinds of awesome.

All because of the star-spangled asshat that began charging in with his team, regardless of Rhodey’s shared plan. The New Avengers had to kick some parts of it to the curb and kept the ones for the evac.

As usual, with Rogers butting in, they’d be relegated to rescue instead of actually being in the fight. Rogers immediately went for storming the castle shit he so loved, sending the bots into different directions, triggering a chaotic chain reaction in the others.

Carol was destroying bots left and right with Rogers and Romanoff near her upfront. Her fury with the man channeled into much more productive means--by decimating enemy ranks with _extreme_ prejudice.

_It **wasn’t **nice knowing you, Rogers._

Vision on the other hand, needed to maneuver around Wanda’s attacks in order to focus on helping the hostages and guide her to pay less attention to him—the witch would take any chance she could get to flirt with the android. The word subtlety was not in the _woman’s _vocabulary, whether for battles or social aspects that it made Tony’s eyes bleed.

He could see Barton on a building near Vision shooting down bots with explosive arrows that Tony could recognize—the ones Barton originally were using before he outfitted him with better ones. _SHIELD_ arrows. The kid was doing fine with keeping the bots away from the civilians and flinging the bots into each other and dousing them in taser webs, making them explode.

Wilson was surprisingly helpful in the air this time, checking the upper floors for trapped hostages and leading the bots to Rhodey—who radiated the same unforgiving energy as Carol—at the back, destroying them like a rocket launcher against aluminum cans.

The Colonels really needed to get a room already. _Please_.

Lang, predictably went with Hope and didn’t seem to mind following her instructions. Out of Rogers’s gang of miscreants, Lang was the only one who had no problem with being flexible during the New Avengers missions they would push their way into as long as he was with Hope. The man was a golden retriever in human skin, would always come back to his human no matter what. Hope did use to have one, if he remembered correctly. He wouldn’t be surprised if part of its soul were infused into Lang’s or some voodoo bullshit like that, better ask Strange later.

The Winter Soldier, on the other hand, was a different beast altogether it nearly gave him a whiplash. The fucker practically disappeared from the field into the ether. As loathe as he was to admit, the man actually lived up to his own myth—_unlike someone_. He was even shooting bots through another like goddamn shish kebab. Tony would have sworn up and down that the bots on their side just went down for no fucking reason if he didn’t have FRIDAY analyze the trajectory of Barnes’s (absurd) shots—for _research _purposes.

He was blasting bots left and right, with the local authorities quickly sweeping in for the hostages. He couldn’t use the more powerful ones of his weapons without risking civilians. When he got the message that all hostages had been accounted for, no death just minor injuries, he went into the offense for real. What he didn’t expect was the sudden influx his way.

What the hell?

Did these bots think Iron Man was their cousin or something?

He aimed both full charged palm repulsors at the bots when all of a sudden Barnes dropped in front of him and began tearing into the bots like there was no tomorrow. Hacking away at them with only his metal arm and a knife in the other like a madman. Tony was struck dumb and didn’t even get to attack because Barnes ripped apart all the bots like an animal in under a few minutes—only stopping when he was sure there were no more.

“Tony, how is it on your end? We got our guy.” Rhodey’s voice filtered into his comm line.

“I’m fine. No civilians hurt. Enemies annihilated without mercy.” He replied blindly. He was still staring at Barnes standing over the carnage and casually flipping his knife into a holster strapped on his thigh.

_What the fuck was all that about?!_

“Without mer—what? Tony, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, Platypus. I’ll see you later.”

“Tony—“

He cut off the comm and removed his helmet, marching over to Barnes who had also removed his mask as soon as he saw Tony move.

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS ALL THAT?!” He screamed at the bastard, keeping two feet of space between them.

“I destroyed the enemies as we were supposed to.” The taller man replied blandly, head tilting slightly with his face aloof though his eyes bore into Tony’s.

The sarcasm was detectable even with the monotonous delivery.

The nerve of this asshole.

“You said it yourself, as _we_ were supposed to! Where the hell do you get off just jumping in front of me like that, huh?!” Tony didn’t even care that he was yelling and that people were already surrounding them. Hell, he could even see someone recording this whole thing with their phone. If he was thinking clearly, he’d have FRIDAY jam the cameras aimed at them right now, but he _wasn’t _and it’s all this motherfucker’s fault.

Damn, he was so pissed.

“There was a lot of them, you need help.” Barnes leveled him with a look that almost made Tony feel like a child being patronized by a parent that the billionaire felt his eye twitch.

“Of all the bullshit you can come up with, you go with that?! Really?! Those things were nothing more than walking soda cans and you think they can stand up to my suit that I would need your help?” He snarled, pointing at the mauled metal at the soldier’s feet. “What do you think would happen to you if I did get to fire as soon as you jump in front of me? _Did that even cross your mind?_”

There was something in the way the grays and blues of Barnes’s eyes darkened that made Tony backtrack a bit. He heard from T’challa that the triggers were already removed due to Shuri modifying his B.A.R.F. technology for Barnes, but they couldn’t say the same about the Winter Soldier mindset itself. That was the reason Barnes was still going through mandatory therapy sessions even though he was cleared for active duty.

Shit.

Whatever it was though, it disappeared as soon as it appeared and Barnes seemed to lose some of the tension in his frame.

“But you didn’t.” he answered almost petulantly, looking at Tony with slightly lidded eyes.

That. Was. It.

“ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!” Tony screamed at him in near hysterics, arms flailing and he nearly threw his helmet at the man in frustration. He was almost as bad as Rogers and that similarity was not doing anything good for Tony’s mood.

“I could have repulsored your reckless ass to seven hells, and no—don’t come up to me with your super soldier bullshit because you damn well know how powerful a fully charged repulsor blast from an Iron Man suit is! I could’ve killed you and your stupid ass just rationalizes that with a ‘But, you didn’t.’?! I didn’t need your help, I had it under control. Besides if I needed help I would’ve asked! Stop putting yourself recklessly in the line of fire for no apparent reason.” He ground out, heaving at the end of his rant. Tony couldn’t even care about how hypocritical he was being at the moment.

He didn’t know what he was expecting. From what he knew from Howard’s stories, Barnes from before was jovial and not quick to anger. While staying at Wakanda though, T’challa’s observation was that the man was sullen (no surprise there) but he was relatively calm for what he’d been through.

So, yes, Tony wasn’t expecting a Rogers-level ranting or maybe a knife to his throat (debatable) but he sure as hell wasn’t expecting an almost _soft _expression (as soft as his resting bitch face could be) and a mostly undetectable _smirk _on the Winter Soldier’s face when he told Tony,

“As you wish.”

Tony moved back as if suddenly yanked by some invisible rope, staring at Barnes with wide eyes. He couldn't even pay attention to their teams finally showing up.

_What the actual fuck?_

_Did the Winter Soldier just pull a FUCKING WESTLEY on him?_

* * *

_a few hours later on Twitter..._

_TRENDS_

_#WinterWestley_

_230K tweets_

_#TonyStarkIsAPrincess_

_128K tweets_

_#WinterIron_

_22K tweets_

_#StarkBarnes_

_18K tweets_

_#IronButtercup_

_12K tweets_

_#BuckyBarnesIsMyWestley_

_9476 tweets_

_"_ _W__INTER SOLDIER GOES WESTLEY ON IRON MAN"_

_https://t.co/Wgr0ANyThz_

_@AnarKiss06: _ _OMG! sdfv;gmoihligapoukgag !@@@ this going to be a thing? Yass! #WinterWestley #StarkBarnes_

_157 replies 12K likes 8K retweets _

_"WINTER SOLDIER GOES WESTLEY ON IRON MAN"_

_https://t.co/Wgr0ANyThz_

_@CaptainAmerica_gurl12 : _ _NOOOO!!! Still IronCap! Bucky why you do this? #WinterIron #StarkBarnes_

_98 replies 13K likes 4K retweets_

_"_ _W__INTER SOLDIER GOES WESTLEY ON IRON MAN"_

_https://t.co/Wgr0ANyThz_

_@PrinceszaEmilia: HE FREAKING PULLED A WESTLEY ON IRON MAN _ _AND IRON MAN'S REACTION THO, BITCH I'M WEAK! XD #WinterWestley #IronButtercup_

_ 146 replies 28K likes 6K retweets_

_ Load more..._


	2. Buttercup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THIS.  
MOTHERFUCKER.  
WAS.  
DOING.  
THIS.  
SHIT.  
ON.  
PURPOSE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all of your wonderful responses!
> 
> I'm so glad you enjoyed this story. This chapter is not as cracky as the first one but i do hope you also enjoy it.

Tony’s eye twitched as FRIDAY pulled up the trending tweets and blogs that began circulating after he ripped Barnes a new one yesterday on the holographic screen in front of him. He nearly had an aneurysm and simultaneously combusted on the spot when Peter and Harley showed them to him while they were out for burgers after the mission.

The boys nearly choked on their burgers and laughed like they were getting paid for it when they saw Tony recoil from Peter’s phone like it was the Devil asking him for a quickie (not Daredevil, but, for the record, he would totally jump Matt’s _Devil_ given the chance. There, he said it).

People clearly had nothing better to do with their lives because apparently, the new in thing now was to fucking ship Iron Man with the goddamn _Winter Soldier._

_He was now also bequeathed with the title ‘Princess Buttercup’ with fucking James Buchanan Barnes as 'Westley'._

_How the fuck was this his life?_

The only saving grace was that at least it wasn’t with the Avengers’ dear Captain: Dread Pirate Rogers_._

Tony jolted at the thought, he could even feel a chill mixed with disgust running down his spine. He may have invoked some mumbo-jumbo entities with that one. He should call Strange to purify the Tower and maybe ask for some sage incense to drive Rogers and his cult away…

“They did well with the video Boss, the angle really highlighted your good side.” FRIDAY chirped. She found the whole thing amusing and kept on showing him more tweets about him and that stupid Rogers-flavored Froyo.

Tony couldn’t even understand how in the world was it possible that she seemed to _like_ Winter Jerkface but more than ready to breathe fire at the mere mention of Captain Humperdick, if she could. He shuddered at the thought. Tesla help them if FRIDAY somehow managed to get around her code to be able to do that. Hopefully, she would find it in her coded heart to spare her hot mess of a Daddy if she ever went Skynet.

“Oh, look. The public are also, what do they call it? Ah yes, _digging_ the height difference.” She then proceeded to pull edited pictures of him and Barnes standing side by side.

“Very funny, FRI.” he droned, taking a sip of his coffee.

“I aim to please. It’s the basis of my code after all.” She replied smugly and honest to Thor _tittered _when he almost spat his coffee before glaring at one of her cameras.

_Even his own child_, he thought looking at the damned pictures.

Get fucked by Rogers to hell and back, Barnes.

Also, _eww_.

The general favorite seemed to be the ones from the joke of a reinstatement ceremony he and the New Avengers were forced to attend. Ironically enough, Rogers was either cropped or erased from beside him and replaced with Barnes.

Oh, he could see it now. Rogers bursting an artery (or if Tony’s lucky, three all at once) because his _lovey-Bucky _was being romantically linked to the unreasonable, evil Tony Stark.

As evil as a man who was forced to fucking sell his 100-acre land with a special facility to the government who wanted to house a band of superpowered hooligans. All because he didn’t want to be anywhere near said hooligans who think it’s their goddamn right to just call dibs on the place. Really, it’s not like the man paid for every single grain of cement used in that facility as well as every piece of rock in the land it stood on. The government even insisted on a grossly discounted rate it was downright swindling.

That was a total violation of rights to property. Dickwads.

Why couldn’t the government just ask Rogers and his crew to pay if they were the ones who would live there? Oh, that’s right. He forgot, their asses were as broke as their numb skulls. And unless Rogers turned out to be a secret Lannister and began shitting gold, they’d never be able to pay for the whole property, even with all their government stipends within a decade combined. But then again, the only thing Rogers knew how to do spectacularly was _spew_ shit. The man mastered such a feat so well that if MIT had a degree for it, he would graduate with a perfect GPA and summa cum laude under his belt.

Rogers would definitely cry to the media about how Tony was destroying the star-spangled romance that withstood the test of time and defied gravity or whatever. That the love between him and Barnes was forged by the all-mighty powers of bullshittery and strengthened by especially concocted steroids. How they were fated to be ‘together’(one of Rogers’s favorite lines in his long list of bullshit) and destined to build a family in addition to his brain dead sycophants while holding hands and singing Kumbaya. You know, because people always figured Should-Have-Stayed-In-The-Ice and Should-Not-Have-Been-Fished-By-Russians were only using the ‘we’re just bros’ thing as an excuse because they were afraid to get sent to jail if word got out that they like blowing each other to kingdom come.

If only Rogers came out earlier to get properly laid (Wilson would probably be willing), instead of maintaining that macho schtick by stringing Sharon along (the dick), it would have probably given immense improvement to Rogers’s bland, moldy white bread roll stuffed with _Casu Marzu_ personality.

Better yet, the Accords Council should’ve sent them both (and the others) to jail because of their more recent crimes instead of just pushing their faces up Rogers’s ass so they could get their hits like junkies on Captain Assholery withdrawal. And sent the criminals to jail they should have, because it was their _Actual. Fucking. Job._

Could have given the paragon of pretentious American exceptionalism some perspective and shit on how the law actually works instead of only thinking, ‘You bully, we fight.’

Yeah, well you’re a hypocrite, Rogers.

Hell, Tony had probably sucked way more dick than those two combined back in his wilder years but, _c’mon_. They should just leave Tony out of it. They could play hide the all-American hotdog and Russian-made sausage all they wanted and sure as fuck, no one would bat an eyelash because _everybody _knew they were already doing that back in the days of yore to begin with! What in blasted fucked up hell was Barnes thinking?

He could feel a crick in his neck at that. He didn’t particularly care about what Barnes thought or the man himself, though really—if only Mrs. Rogers stopped and used whatever brain cell B.A.R.F had managed to recover for him and left Tony alone, they would not have this mess crawling up their asses.

On second thought, maybe, Tony was overthinking it. Barnes, as proven by their interaction yesterday, was a sarcastic asshole and probably didn’t even know about The Princess Bride. That would be like saying the Winter Soldier triggers were ‘Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo’ and ‘Open Sesame’, if he did. He could’ve just mentioned that to annoy Tony and wasn’t actually aware of its _cultural impact_.

Not surprising at all, considering Rogers would rather not learn about the modern pop culture and educate himself. He definitely wouldn’t want his _pwecious, widdle Bucky_ be corrupted by this whole new world. Also, Tony just couldn’t see it—the silent, big, bad HYDRA-made super solider watching a sappy, fantasy rom-com so he could quote it to the eccentric futurist from his gang’s rival team. The engineer was pretty sure HYDRA wasn’t really big on fairytales, no matter how much they had obviously appreciated Frozen, as evidenced by Barnes and the other Winter Soldiers in their fridge back in Siberia. He was also aware that he was being stereotypical and he should stop but, the way the public was presenting what happened just _didn’t make sense_. He nearly killed the man, his reaction was warranted because Barnes was a complete moron.

‘_But, you didn’t_’ his ass.

To be fair, he had thought of the same thing at first. Looking at it now, though—it was just an overreaction from him (due to the adrenalin from the fight) and the public (because people somehow pull rose-colored glasses out of thin air). This would blow over soon enough if he ignored it.

After all, people did the same thing to him and Rogers before in the Dark Ages—which was way worse because he was with Pepper (the light of his life; his Queenly Dragon lady knight in shiny, deadly and outrageously priced Louboutin stilettos) and people would actually ask if she was fine with _sharing him with Rogers_. Ugh.

He just threw up in his mouth a bit.

He set his mug on the coffee table when he heard the elevator doors open, revealing Rhodey and the Defenders.

“Hey, Defenders! Nice of you guys to drop by.” Tony jumped from the couch and went over to give each member a hug and leading them further into the room.

“Well, they called me and asked if they could hang out with us here in the Tower, so here they are, _Buttercup_.” Rhodey smirked at him, prompting their visitors to laugh. _Rude_. They would see if he could still laugh at Tony when he no longer played wingman for him and talked him up to Carol.

The Defenders brought buckets of chicken, Chinese, pizza and tons of soda with them. Oh boy, Harley and Peter plus Danny on a sugar rush. He’d have to come up with a plan on how to sic them on Rhodey later.

“I resent th—“he shot back only to be cut off by Jess.

“Oooh, and what’s this?” she asked as she pointed at the holoscreen, waggling her eyebrows at Tony.

Shit, he forgot about that.

“Wait, are you actually checking out news about you and _Westley_?” Danny laughed, coming over to where Jess was standing and looking at the pictures after placing the buckets of chicken on the coffee table. Luke and Rhodey were in charge of the pizza and Chinese.

“No, I’m not!” he snapped, throwing one of the pillows on the couch at Danny “FRIDAY just thought it would be funny to show them to me.”

“Oh my God, you actually are?! What are you a teenage girl with a crush?” Matt joined in and sat on the couch, clutching _his_ pillow. Tony had noticed it before but Matt seemed to really like that goose down, velvet pillow. The man would always have it in his arms when the Defenders visited. He just didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing that the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen couldn’t see it. Probably for the best as it was easily one of the most hideous things Tony had ever seen, almost on par with Barton during that ingrown toenail infection after New York…

_Nope, don’t go that road otherwise any food consumed would end on the floor._

The pillow was in the nastiest shade of glittery purple Tony had ever had the misfortune of laying his eyes on with the bright-as-all-fuck blend of _fuschia, canary yellow and turqouise _tassels on each corner, yet for Matt, _he kept it_. Maybe it was because it was a gift from Vision, of all the Stark traits he could inherit it had to be their _excellent _taste in giving gifts (apparently Bruce was the one with the good genes). Or most likely, Vision was fucking with him when he gave the pillow to Tony—messing with Tony through awful gifts was a JARVIS thing. Still, even in the face of _Pepper_ telling him repeatedly that it contrasts too much with the whole living room, which was her polite way of saying ‘It’s fucking ugly, Tony. Get rid of it. NOW.’, the pillow remained in its place.

“Shut up, Murdock. At least, I’m not the one attached to that velvet abomination.”

“So you’re not denying it, Tony?” Matt quipped giving a laughing Jess a high-five.

“I am not looking at _anything_. I told you FRIDAY just wanted to show them to me.”

“But you didn’t have to_ actually look at them_, Boss. You could have easily told me to put them away or erase them from the Internet.” FRIDAY interjected in an almost lazy tone.

“She got you there.” Luke pointed out, commandeering the love seat, opposite a cackling Rhodey. Tony would deny it until he die that he released an indignant screech at that, much to the amusement of the other occupants of the room. Good for them, after all, _he aimed to please_.

If FRIDAY had a body, she would’ve flipped her hair and reclined back on the couch while pretending to be interested in her nails. Why did he have to create AIs that always make it their first order of business to learn and master sass only to use it against him? Howard was no Father of the Year for sure and an ass to his own son but, if he were like this to the man, he kind of understood why dear ol' dad had little patience for teen Tony. _Understood-ish._

He called it right there when all the ribbing did multiply a thousand fold with the arrival of the remaining New Avengers plus Stephen and Harley. If it was like this now, it would be worse when they meet Rogers and his crew the day after tomorrow for their monthly meeting.

He was so not looking forward to it.

Ugh.

Stupid Barnes.

* * *

And the dreaded day thus came upon them.

Operating in areas near to each other made it a quick decision for the Accords Council to put the Assholes, the New Avengers and the Defenders together for the monthly meetings. However, Tony would not discount the possibility that Rogers and Romanoff had something to do with it, what with Rogers’s legions of fanboys working in the building.

He just finished another meeting at SI and went straight to this one. In fifteen minutes the meeting would start and they’d have another mind-numbing, hour long episode of Rogers and Cult.

He really should’ve played hooky or maybe, watched Downton Abbey with Happy and laugh his ass off when his Forehead of Security cried from one of the episodes. Tsk. Who the hell was he kidding? They would fill separate waste baskets with tissues. If only he could leave his teammates with those morons and he did not have to help Luke calm Jess down _when_ she decided that she like the contrast that Rogers’ face made with the gray tiles on the floor.

As the thought crossed his mind, he sent a prayer to Loki, hoping that dramatic diva was listening somewhere, to make Jess decide today would be the day because he knew the God of Mischief hated Rogers too. And it would make for a good entertainment as well.

He better fucking make it happen he was now officially the only god Tony had ever prayed to.

* * *

Tony rounded the corner into another hallway when he smacked into a wall and landed on his side on the floor. _Hard. _

Dammit, did he somehow lose his way? No, wait, that wasn’t possible. He knew the place almost like the back of his hand! Why would there be a wall here? Did they renovate the place? Who’s the fucking idiot that put a goddamn wall in the middle of an intersecting hallway? He’d make sure they would see their ass attending another five years of college just so they get Architecture right.

His mind was running miles per second as he carefully sat upright. Damn, it was like_ the Hulk_ gave him a love tap. From his spot on the floor, he saw muscular legs covered in tactical pants quickly move away from the vending machine and bend down to help him.

“Dear God.. I’m sorry, doll. Are you alright?” 

Tony froze and all efforts to get up were aborted when he heard that raspy baritone.

Oh, no.

Hell no.

Loki, you dumb bitch.

* * *

When Tony prayed for entertainment he didn’t mean _this_ kind. Apparently, Morticia Addams was still gung ho on that drink he never got in 2012. He should’ve made Thor bring a Macallan or two back home to Asgard.

Of course, as dramatic as Loki was, he would put Tony in the most ancient (as ancient as his Asgardian ass)cliché in the history of rom-com clichés—the heroine bumping into the hero, falling into his arms and they live happily ever after.

No.

Just, no.

And Barnes, _the fucker_, wasn’t helping either.

The futurist turned to find Barnes down on one knee and offering his flesh hand to him. He looked at the hand then the Winter Soldier’s face. The greys boring into brown pools and there was concern coloring the usually vacant canvass of his face.

“Stark?”

This ain’t no fairytale, damn you Barnes. 

He was more than capable of standing up on his own, fuck you very much. Thus, he billionaire did exactly that, ignoring the proffered hand and leaving Barnes still on his knightly pose in the process. Tony tugged on his suit to avoid further wrinkles and began walking to the conference room at the other end of the hall.

“Tony, wait!”

Tony did not have to turn around to know that the supersolider was following him. He trudged on, intent on ignoring the man only to feel a warm hand wrapped around his wrist.

Ha! Clichés all around, yay…_not_.

He abruptly stopped and looked down on the offending hand.

“Let go, Barnes.” He snapped at the man and tugged on his arm. They were already gathering attention, probably since he bumped into the bastard. People were looking and whispering—damn it all, this was going to end up trending on Twitter in _minutes_. “Let go, dumbass.”

“I will, I’m sorry, but you dropped something.” Barnes calmly informed him, completely ignoring both the onlookers and Tony’s protests. The soldier upturned the hand in his grip and his metal one placed a pair of sunglasses in Tony’s palm, even went to close the engineer’s fingers over it.

Tony only looked at their hands in disbelief. He seriously couldn’t decide if he wanted to cry or slap the bastard. There was a telltale flash of a cellphone camera in his peripheral and a noise that suspiciously sounded like ‘aww’. Dammit, decision made. Have a mental break down, it was—he may _actually fucking cry_. Why?

That’s because it finally hit him.

THIS.

MOTHERFUCKER.

WAS.

DOING.

THIS.

SHIT.

ON.

PURPOSE.

The genius could feel that he was starting to breathe heavily. He was so angry he almost couldn’t see straight. He was prepared to ignore the bullshit that resulted from their interaction the other day. He truly was. He even rationalized it in his head, for fuck’s sake. Now, this? Did Rogers put him up to this shit? ‘Hey, Bucky baby, we have already exhausted our bag of tricks to annoy Tony, so wanna give it a shot?’

Ooh, if that was the case then congratulations, Rogers. **_It works like a fucking charm_**.

Fueled by sudden spike in anger, very much like the one from the other day but more, Tony yanked his own from underneath the other man’s hands before he could completely let the engineer go.

“ARE. YOU. TRYING. TO. PISS. ME. OFF?” he growled, moving closer to the other man and keeping his voice low as much as he could. “Because let me tell you, you’re doing _so well_.”

Barnes’ only reaction was to widen his eyes for a smidgen, which only made his anger worse. “What?”

“You heard me. Well?” Tony tipped his head back to glare at the asshole, blinking the tears away before they could completely well up in his eyes.

He wouldn’t cry. Not in front of this fucker.

“I’m not.” Barnes frowned, kept the eye contact with the smaller man by angling his head down a bit.

“Don’t lie to me! Did Rogers put you up to this?”

“What does Stevie have to do with me wanting to help you?” A slight crease formed on Barnes’s forehead, which was probably his version of looking at someone like they’ve got an uncontrollable fungal growth on theirs.

“You doing all this just to piss me off, asshole! You actually think I wouldn’t notice? You saw that it didn’t work so well for the others, so you’re trying your hand on it! You better knock it off, Barnes.” he hissed.

Barnes sighed—the fucking nerve.

“I really am just trying to help you, doll.” He drawled in a tired tone like he ran a marathon from Malibu to New York and back. Ten times.

Tony’s temper flared at the use of the pet name, “I’m not your fucking doll, stop calling me that.”

“As you wi—“

Tony recognized the dastardly line and he _fucking lost it_.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” he screamed, effectively stopping Barnes and the murmurs around them.

A few seconds passed and he heard another voice that he’d really rather not.

“Tony? Bucky?”

They both turned and saw Rogers, the small crowd parting for him.

He was looking at the two them like someone shot his dog again and again before running it through a meat grinder. He must’ve gone to see what took Barnes so long. _Great_.

Cliché number three: the jealous lover suddenly appears.

Tony suddenly felt so drained and decided that he’d had enough of dealing with the Star-spangled Bromeos. He moved away from Barnes and deftly avoided Rogers trying to catch his wrist when he passed by him.

Not going to work, asshole. Your darling over there already did the same shit.

He didn’t even look at Rogers when he called his name using that same pitiful tone he used when Rogers wanted to have his ego stroked.

* * *

Thankfully, no one asked about what happened outside the conference room as the meeting went underway. Not that they need to, surely the Internet would not let them down. Tony could tell the audio from the video—let’s face it, there would be one—wouldn’t be clear enough to pick up their conversation. They were whispering (harshly, in Tony’s case) to each other, the whole thing would be gibberish aside from Tony shutting Barnes up.

The tension in the room was so palpable that no one—not even Barton and Maximoff, who usually had a lot of unnecessary things to say—barely made a sound apart from reports getting rehashed, agenda being set, questions given and answered as well as turning of sheets of paper.

Loki must be writhing on the floor with laughter in Asgard. Even if this was the payout, Tony vowed never to pray to that smarmy son of a bitch ever again.

He could deal with the quiet (it was glorious not to hear Captain Entitled and his gang spit more crap) but what he had no patience for as of the moment was the fact that Rogers was sitting directly in front of him. The blond kept shooting him looks like Tony broke his favorite toy and insulted his entire familial lineage. Rogers probably wanted to talk to him about what transpired between his lover and Tony but, Tony didn’t care and neither did the lover in question. The man was sitting beside Rogers, looking like death called upon them because the blank look on Barnes’ face was the same one he had when he was a split end’s breadth away from ripping every single person in the area limb from limb.

Tony on the other hand, just paid attention to the candy bowl in the middle of the table. Candy bowl was an understatement because it was almost large enough to hold at least two liters of punch.

He just had his hand on another one of the lemon and mint flavored chewy candies when he felt a warm hand brush against his, fingers trying to entwine with his own under the pretense of searching for a specific candy whilst using the rest for cover.

Fucking asshole.

Tony already told him to knock it off.

The billionaire was about to reiterate when he saw the arm it was connected to. It was a _left _arm.

Brown eyes went up to meet greenish blue ones. Rogers gave him a small, inviting smile as his fingers started to curl around Tony’s.

Tony recoiled, quickly pulling his hand out of the bowl. If the others noticed what the hell Rogers was doing, no one said a thing. Rogers, on the other hand, looked as though Tony had told the Pope to go to hell in the most colorful language he could muster.

“Tony—“

A scratching sound cut Rogers off and everyone turned to Barnes who had leaned over to pull the candy bowl closer to him. Well, with the way he was glaring at everyone, no one would deny the Winter Soldier his candy.

When Barnes had pushed the bowl away from him back in front of Tony, he must have forgotten to temper his strength because as it slid on the table the bowl nearly toppled over scattering candy all over the floor…

Or that was what Tony would have said if not for a small packet of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups (that was not in the bowl earlier) that landed on his lap with a piece of post-it attached to it.

_I’m sorry._

* * *

_ on Twitter later that day..._

_ "WINTERIRON: HALLWAY KISS"_

_ pic.twitter.com/jL29sqPBga_

_@VenusLoveeYou: OH MY GOD!! SFHAFAOG;D JFJ/AU Idgbwyl!!!! where was this taken?! Were they really going to kiss?! #WinterIron #StarkBarnes_

_ 121 replies 11K likes 10K retweets_

_ "WINTERIRON: HALLWAY KISS"_

_ pic.twitter.com/jL29sqPBga_

_@MIKARU_shipsIt: HELL YEAH, MY SHIP IS SAILING AND Y'ALL CAN'T STOP IT. #WinterWestley #TonyStarkIsAPrincess_

_ 115 replies 14K likes 12K retweets_

_ "WINTERIRON: HALLWAY KISS"_

_ pic.twitter.com/jL29sqPBga_

_@LegendHasANAme14: OMFG! I'M SOBBING! THEY LEGIT LOOK LIKE THIS PIC OF WESTLEY AND BUTTERCUP! #BuckyBarnesIsMyWestley #IronButtercup_

143 replies 16K likes 14K retweets

_ Load more..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Legendary Sniper skills...*rolls eyes*


	3. Dread Pirate Rogers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He supposed Tony being the son of an old friend would definitely make their paths cross. Sure, but for the two of them to meet almost immediately after Steve got out of the ice?
> 
> That they would be fighting side by side to protect the world?
> 
> It was fate.
> 
> He had been given another anchor to keep him steady as the world sways and inevitably changes beneath his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING..
> 
> Prepare to cringe and rage, my friends.
> 
> I originally intended this whole story to be cracky with light angst and well-seasoned with salt.  
But Steeb insists on being creepy...so..*whistles*
> 
> please enjoy
> 
> No 'tweets' for now because this happened the same time as chapter two but in Steeb's POV

His mother raised Steve with a firm belief in God and that He has plans for everyone.

As such, he also believed in miracles and fate.

How he got to being Captain America from being a dirt poor, illness-ridden little guy from Brooklyn had been proof of that. Though, people of Science, like Tony, would argue that all the brawn and health was a product of Erskine’s formula. Still he believed it was a miracle.

When he thought he had lost every part of his old life and had to face this modern, peculiar world on his own—he found a new family, the Avengers _and_ even got reunited with his best friend, Bucky.

It was fate.

That’s why when they were still in Wakanda and T’challa had informed him that they had already found a way to cure Bucky of the triggers HYDRA implanted in his best friend’s head—he almost wept in relief.

Thank God.

His best friend would be healed.

His prayers were answered and another miracle was given to him.

* * *

When he had found out how the triggers were going to be removed, it was as if he had been struck by lightning and he _had_ been around lightning, all thanks to Thor. How he had not seen it coming was a surprise even to him. Of course, the _only_ thing that would make it possible was something Tony had a hand in creating—the man after all had done some things that were considered impossible, well, possible. Like giving his mechanical and electrical ‘children’ _emotions _and breathing _life _into them. He should have known, because he _knew_ that even if there were times the two of them were at odds with each other—he and Tony Stark were _meant_ to be in each other’s life, by each other’s _side_.

When he had come out of the ice and found out he had slept for sixty-six years and that the war was over, he got frightened. How was he supposed to face everything from now on? Everything was new, unfamiliar—_foreign_. He barely had time to get used to the changes he had gone through with the serum and completely process the horrors from the front lines along with the grief of losing Bucky during the war. Decades in the future, he mourned the life he could’ve had with Peggy. All the people he knew and loved were gone to the war or time, unbeknownst to him as he slept in the ice.

It was then that he found _him_.

He was indifferent when he first got the dossiers from Fury. The mean bastard did not even inform him of the surprise within. He was now of the mind that Fury probably thought his reaction would be funny when he finds out about Howard’s son.

_Howard’s son._

He supposed Tony being the son of an old friend would definitely make their paths cross. Sure, but for the two of them to meet almost _immediately _after Steve got out of the ice?

That they would be fighting side by side to protect the world?

_It was fate._

He had been given another anchor to keep him steady as the world sways and inevitably changes beneath his feet.

* * *

By the time he had finally met Tony, he was—as much as he didn’t want to admit it—_irritated._

The pissing contest in the helicarrier only made it worse.

It was Tony’s damn _mouth,_ he thought.

He could allow that he was partly at fault. He had been looking for some traces of a dead man in the person who was in front of him. There had been some—the showboating, the effortless command of the room, the smarts (he’d later find out that Tony apparently _exceeded _Howard, and Howard _was_ the smartest person he knew at the time), the almost _unconstitutional _natural magnetism that drew people to them likes flies to honey.

However, underneath it all, Tony Stark had been _so different_ from Howard it was like a vicious slap in the face. Damn, if Tony wasn’t _so ready_ to give him one then.

Tony was everything and nothing and more than he had expected of the future. He was almost like a character in those science fiction stories in the Amazing Stories and Astounding Stories of Super-Science magazines that Bucky loved to read back then. Runaround and Marooned off Vesta were some of Bucky's favorites. Imagine his delight when he found out few months after moving into the Avengers Tower that Tony loved both of those stories too.

Tony Stark was how future was painted in their minds. They may have gotten a glimpse of the future from Howard’s Stark Expo but after a long period of time passing by him, he was now _living_ in the future that Tony so effortlessly changes with naught but a few words and a flick of his wrist.

It only further strengthened Steve’s belief that it was fate that brought them together.

He could still remember how the white-hot relief flooded him back in New York when Tony jolted into consciousness after the Hulk roared. And when Tony had told him that he and the others were more than welcome to stay with him in the Tower he had been happy. He thanked him for it and decided he’d come back after exploring this new America. However, he got signed up with SHIELD in DC after that, thus never actually got to take Tony up on the offer.

He, for all the life the serum had given him, would never admit the decision to continue staying in DC until SHIELD fell was partly because of one Pepper Potts.

He had nothing against Pepper, in all honesty. She was beautiful, fierce, frighteningly efficient in everything she does, gracious and was hands down the only person in the world, next to Rhodes, that could make Tony sit down and listen without the engineer even _thinking_ of putting up a fuss.

It was a skill he never got to truly master in the years he had known the man. He’d have to work on that. The two of them should not be at odds with each other, they were the ones that kept the Avengers intact.

He could chalk it up to the fact that one had to rack up the years being by the billionaire’s side all the time like Pepper and Rhodes did to do so. Pepper had been Tony’s PA for close to a decade before they began seeing each other.

Therein lied Steve’s little, tiny _issue_ with Pepper Potts.

She was always by Tony’s side _at the time_.

* * *

He hadn’t known it yet that it was _that,_ what he felt for Tony. He thought he was lucky and was extremely grateful that he found another part of his former life albeit a different generation. A part that was at once old and new yet infinitely precious.

He just assumed that the achy, sour clenching of his stomach at the thought of living in the Tower with Tony and Pepper was just his old timey sensibilities acting up, not wanting and thinking it inappropriate to barge in on the happy couple. He had been in DC for close to a year when he realized it. In between the random texts he would get before missions start, the late night calls and the going out for drinks whenever Tony was in town (with or without Natasha), Steve realized he had fallen for Tony. Out of respect for Tony’s commitment to his relationship with Pepper, he had entertained (though not really acted on) Natasha’s attempts to set him up with someone. Sharon, as nice as she was, was really just there and took his mind off things, particularly Peggy. Looking at it now, he shouldn’t have started flirting with her, his fella wouldn’t have appreciated it. It was ironic that he would think so, considering Tony had dalliances of the most lurid nature before he became Iron Man, but Tony _had _turned over a new leaf and proved himself capable of being loyal to one person. Granted, the change happened when Tony had just started being with Pepper but one cannot deny the fact that it mostly coincided the time Steve was being retrieved from the ice. Again, it was fate making sure that when they meet, all distractions would be cast away.

He had initially thought that it was just a fleeting attraction. Tony was a very attractive man, one that caught the fancy of both men and women alike. Charming and speaks so well that one would want to know _how_ he was taught to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ properly. He was incredibly intelligent and had a wicked sense of humor that needed one to brush up on their knowledge of the modern pop culture to understand. That was the only downside to his humor though, it required a lot of work to be appreciated. The man was also highly sensual and liked to flirt all the time, Steve both wanted to jump for joy and kick his own ass at the same time when he had finally caught on that Tony wasn’t actually mocking him.

Like he had thought with that first statement about him doing Pilates.

In spite of all that, what really drew him to Tony was the man’s compassion, generosity and resilience. He had never complained about schmoozing here and there for hours on end to gather funds that would go to different beneficiaries of the Maria Stark Foundation. Standing up again when he had all but razed his company to the ground when he decided to stop manufacturing weapons and focus on electronics and clean energy instead. Getting up to fight when he had been knocked down so many times, no matter how much he was hurt. How he had the September Foundation fund all the projects of young prodigies in need of financial assistance…and so much more.

In the wake of Ultron, things had been _murky_ between him and Tony. Tony stepped down as an active Avenger and decided to move out of the Compound to go back to the Tower. He had not been lying back then when he said that he was at home. The team was there with him and Tony would come back. He had been sure of it. They were a pair after all, meant to be together.

Then things took a darker turn.

The Accords came into play.

The Civil War.

As well as Zemo and the truth about the death of Tony’s parents.

* * *

He had deeply regretted not telling Tony sooner but he didn’t want to cause Tony pain—he would never want that for his fella. Steve knew it was cowardly of him, but, if he were to tell Tony…it would make him turn away from Steve. He couldn’t have that. He had everything planned—get Bucky help and tell Tony after. Tony would never harm someone in obvious need of help. Zemo ruined everything and Steve wasn’t able to stop him in time which led to him and Tony falling apart, Bucky being caught in the crossfire. He should’ve destroyed that screen the moment Tony said he recognized the road in the video and then snapped Zemo’s neck.

He would not regret his decision of protecting Bucky and doing everything he could to stop Zemo from (what he thought was that bastard’s plan) waking up the other Winter Soldiers—he could not allow threats like them to roam free. People would think he was being a hypocrite seeing as he had protected Bucky with all his might, but what they don’t understand was Bucky was _never_ HYDRA to begin with and all those things that he did as the Winter Soldier were forced on him. He was innocent.

After the bitterness that engulfed all of them that was Siberia, Tony reached out. It may not be in the way Steve had hoped for—a response to his letter and a call—but it was right there. Sending B.A.R.F. to Wakanda to help Bucky was both the confirmation and apology that Steve knew it was meant to be. Tony was one of those people who believe that action speaks louder than words. Finally seeing the truth as to why Steve had done everything he could to save Bucky. He knew his fella would see his way and Tony had obviously known that Steve would recognize the gesture.

The others had been skeptical at first when he told them about Tony sending help for removing Bucky’s triggers. They had reason because of the Raft, but once Natasha had pointed out that Tony had nothing to do with it, they agreed. She added that the reason Tony actually was only ever in the Accords bandwagon was to first put a hand on the wheel, like she had said before, and to remove that son of a bitch Ross in the political field so that he would not be able to use the Avengers or turn the government against them. That was something of a revelation to Steve, if only Tony had told Steve his plan instead of going through it on his own. He should have known that Tony would not truly turn his back on their family. Tony would protect them or die trying. His fella was always sweet like that.

That truth was solidified further when T’challa told them that they could go back to the Compound and that pardons were being lobbied for them, under the condition that they sign the Accords. He had deliberated the conditions with the others before agreeing to anything. He was glad he did, they managed to put their feet down firmly and sent their amendments before the Accords locked them into something that would destroy what the Avengers stood for.

He had barely managed to hide how excited he was to go back home.

Back to Tony.

Just as fate intended.

Although there was a bit of guilt, there was no shame in him at how giddy he was when he found out that since the moment Tony had told him that he and Pepper were taking a _break_, they had not gotten back together. One would argue that Steve should be sympathetic to Pepper now that she and Tony called it quits, but he couldn’t. She had her chance, she had let him go and Steve was going to damn well take that spot she warmed up for him. Tony was waiting for him after all, as he should have.

* * *

The moment they all got back in the Compound, they already had tried to set up a meeting with the genius. But as Natasha had expected, Tony didn’t accept any meeting they tried to set up with him, even if they did go to the proper channels. It was most likely Rhodes, the man was always territorial when it came to Tony and even then had been politely turning his nose up when it came to Steve and the others. Natasha did not counter his theory, though she did say that Tony had always been like an angry little kitten—vicious and unafraid to hurt, consequences be damned but would turn into a little ball of fluff and that let out the sweetest purrs when appeased. She said to stroke Tony’s ego first and then he’ll inevitably give in. Steve laughed and never got over how appropriate that comparison was that it incidentally triggered some rather vivid dreams.

Rhodes was a good man and a good friend to Tony which made him a good ally in Steve’s books but as of the moment, Steve was livid with him(even if he wouldn’t show it in the field)—he was keeping Steve away from what was his.

Rhodes had even eviscerated Steve and Natasha’s plans on getting Tony back to the family by pitching to some members of the Council that Tony stepped down from the Avengers after Ultron because of the ‘unhealthy’ team dynamics that ultimately led to the Civil War. If that wasn’t enough, he had gleefully slathered salt into the wounds by pulling some strings to get a new team started and putting Tony in it. Steve had barely managed to contain his fury when they got called for that announcement. He had never destroyed more punching bags _and_ gym equipment than he ever had the moment he got to the Compound’s gym.

How hard was it to understand that he and Tony were soulmates, fated, _destined_ to be together?

The members of his team could understand—fuck, Clint even said that the way Steve and Tony would argue before was reminiscent of how couples who were married for a long time would. Natasha was relentless in her efforts to bring him and Tony back together again. Sam would add that Steve was the one to lead and guide while Tony provided the home, hence it would make sense for them to end up with each other. Wanda seemed displeased with the thought but he knew that as long as it made him happy, Wanda would be happy too and she was always a sweet kid—she would be a part of his and Tony’s brood along with the kid from the Mandarin fiasco and Tony’s protégé Spider-man. They could arrange for her to have some of the best tutors to help her catch up on everything she missed in school when HYDRA had her and then send her to one of the best colleges in the country. Scott blurted out that from what he got from the Internet, before the whole Accords mess—half the world believed that Tony and Steve should be together, regardless of Tony’s involvement with Pepper.

And wasn’t that something. Apparently, Tony kept himself surrounded by people who couldn’t see what _half the world _could.

Bucky, on the other hand, said he had no idea that Steve felt that way about Tony and had been upset when he realized he had hurt Steve’s fella. Steve had forgiven him for it, he was just protecting himself and Tony attacked him even though he wasn’t at fault. Bucky had even asked about the extent of his relationship with Tony. Steve thought it was because of those times Steve had grilled Bucky when he picked up gals (and sometimes fellas) left and right, that he wanted to get back at Steve for it. He laughed before he sobered up and told him that it didn’t go past some lingering looks, touches here and there and going out for some drinks, lunches or dinner when they happened to be in the same area. He had also told him that it was all going to change now, though not completely, no. Those little things were nice and he didn’t want to lose them but, Steve knew they were meant for something more and Bucky would be his best man.

Bucky was supportive of Steve and Tony’s burgeoning romance.

That’s what Steve thought at the time at least.

Until this ‘Princess Bride’ bullshit came up.

* * *

He had just finished sending an email to request another meeting with Tony through SI, praying that it would be his lucky day and Tony would finally talk to him. He never saw the billionaire outside of Accords monthly inter-team meetings and missions that they were in together(both of which he and Nat had secretly managed to talk two Senators into backing) and he missed him _so goddamn much_. Steve had just began searching online for any topics Tony might be interested in talking about when he found some link about _Bucky_ in a social media site. His best friend didn’t even have social media, so why the hell would there be a topic about him? Unless, it was people trying to crucify him again for the things he had done under HYDRA’s control. Things Bucky had been tried and proven innocent for in court. With that in mind, he clicked on the link.

Steve couldn’t describe how he felt, even if he tried. The fury he felt for Rhodes because of the subterfuge the man did, would be considered a prick of a needle at best compared to this one. The only thing he could think of was his _best friend _was trying to make a move on _Tony_. His Tony, his fella, a man who was spoken for. He couldn’t even remember moving out of his room to find Bucky nor even ripping his bedroom door from its hinges.

Steve found Bucky in the shooting range, swiftly assembling one of his guns, a SIG Sauer P226 MK25. Even with the silent footsteps, Bucky had turned around just in time for him to see Steve take a swing. Bucky quickly sidestepped the punch and grabbed Steve’s arm with his metal hand, using Steve’s own momentum against him and swiping his feet from underneath him.

Or he would have, if Steve hadn’t followed it with a punch to the gut that made him nearly lose his balance. In retaliation, Bucky twisted the arm in his grip to Steve’s back and followed it with a vicious kick to the back of one of Steve’s knees, bodily pushing the taller supersoldier to kneel and stepping on both his calves to prevent him from getting up. Steve tried to swipe at Bucky with his free hand until the brunet pressed the gun he was assembling earlier to Steve’s temple.

“What the fuck are you doing, Barnes?!” Clint yelled from his perch on one of the beams in the Compound’s ceiling before quickly climbing down.

“You have eyes, Barton. Use them.” was the bland reply, his cold gaze not wavering in the face of Steve’s righteous fury.

The others came to them with Natasha and Sam stopping Wanda from attacking Bucky. And Scott just looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there at the moment. Well, not like they could fault him—Captain America and the Winter Soldier in a brawl, it’s bound to be bloody. Shit, the first time they did this, Steve ended up in the hospital and the second they _both_ ended up in a river.

“No, _lapochka_. They’re just sorting their issues out. They’re boys, it’s just a bit of rough housing.” Natasha calmly said with a hand on Wanda’s shoulder.

“That’s a bit extreme to be considered ‘a bit’, don’t you think?” Sam snapped, though he also had not removed his hand on Wanda’s arm. “Barnes, knock it off. Let Cap go.”

“Not until this punk tells us why he suddenly decided he wanted to punch my head off my shoulders.” He replied in that raspy monotone usually set people around on edge. It was too much like the Winter Soldier when activated made worse by the fact that even when they got rid of the triggers, Bucky had taken to speaking in a gravelly tone with an odd mix of Russian and Brooklyn cadence which made it difficult for them to tell if he was Bucky or in the Winter Soldier mode. T’challa’s doctors said that they had to accept that the Soldier was an aspect of who Bucky was and thus wouldn’t really go away even if they had the words removed. That being said, they only had _one_ Bucky Barnes with them and Steve just had to live with the fact that when his best friend came back, he was more ‘comrade’ than ‘pal’.

Natasha, always the clever one, caught on swiftly, “Soldat,” she began, her tone dutiful, “Perhaps, he had seen the video from the mission yesterday. The one with you and Tony.”

That was also something that rankled Steve, Natasha had always been friendly with him but she was never like this. He knew she had a certain amount of respect for him, but with Bucky, she was surprisingly considerate and almost deferential whenever she addressed him, more so during missions or trainings—always with a soft murmur of _Soldat_.

Natasha had explained that the Winter Soldier was one of her teachers in the Red Room and the best one at that. Also, she had never known _Bucky Barnes_ that’s why it was hard for her to make a distinction between Steve’s friend and her ruthless teacher leading her to call the man ‘Soldier’, as he was known to all the students in the Black Widow program. She deferred to him despite of the fact that her teacher had zero qualms shooting someone through one of his former students—the man was just doing his job, she added with a shrug. Bucky never bothered to correct her whenever she called him Soldat, in fact neither did he discourage it and would just reply with,

“_Natalia_, if that was the case, he should have said so.” He glanced down at Steve, “I was just trying to help Stark. There were a lot of robots coming his way and there were still civilians near. If he used his repulsors, who knows what would have happened.” He kept eye contact with Steve throughout his little spiel before he let the man stand back up, “Got all of that, Stevie?”

“Cap, isn’t that the same thing people did to you with Stark before? All those shipping and dating rumors shit?” Clint, surprisingly, added when he came closer.

“Yeah, people could just be overreacting. Besides, it’s not like Barnes jammed his tongue down Stark’s throat or anything.” Sam’s auxiliary input made a grimace show itself on Steve’s face, Wanda following suit—she was _their_ kid now, after all. His and Tony’s

Bucky only gave them a glance before raising an eyebrow at Steve as if to prove his point.

Jerk.

“Then what about your little proclamation, _Westley_?”Steve snapped, though he was relieved and subsequently flooded with guilt. Fuck, he nearly tore his best friend’s head off (literally) in jealousy. The best friend he vowed to _protect_. The friend he had to _subdue _his fella for so he can’t hurt said friend. Well, if he ever was in doubt that he loved Tony, this was proof all right—they say it was true love when they bring out the worst and the best parts of you.

“Who the hell is Westley?”

It was delivered in that dull, confused manner Bucky did back in DC that it made Steve, Natasha and Sam burst into awkward snickers before full on cackling accentuated with some snorts—well, the men did…Natasha had class and just giggled. A little.

Scott, Wanda and Clint just exchanged looks with each other before turning back to them.

“Does that mean we have to watch The Princess Bride later for movie night?” Clint snarked, when the laughter subsided.

“The Princess Bride?” Wanda asked, “Is it a fairytale?”

“It is! You’re gonna love it. My Cassie loves that movie so much.” Scott chirped as Wanda nodded.

“I’m sorry, buddy.” Steve clamped a hand on the man’s shoulder and he had to hold back a whine when he saw a sly look in his best friend’s eyes even when the rest of his face was impassive. That glint usually never bode well for whoever son of a bitch it was directed to.

“You should be. I handed your stupid ass back to you in less than half a minute. You’re slacking.”

“C’mon, man.” He groaned as the rest of the team laughed.

* * *

Bucky was restless when they arrived for the meeting and had gone out to buy something from the vending machine at the other end of the hall. Steve had offered the candy bowl but he just frowned at the multi-flavored chewy candies and gum whilst downright glaring at the licorice, as if it would incinerate itself into oblivion if he did. They were early though some of the others were already there—there was Jessica Jones and Luke Cage with Daredevil, Iron Fist on the other hand, would be running late and he messaged the committee head picked out for this month’s meeting.

The Avengers had worked with the Defenders before but the latter were almost standoffish with them. Apart from that, for some reason, Jones had a particular brand of nastiness to her that she liked to utilize on Natasha, Wanda and Steve. As such, they never worked with those four again unless it was truly important. The Defenders were a great team, sure, very in-sync with one another—especially Jones and Cage, though he had found out that, apparently, they were husband and wife—but they needed concrete leadership to keep the unprofessional behavior in check. When he looked at Jones and Cage outside the field though, Steve would think, this could be them, him and Tony. Before, they already had synchronicity in the field that matched the one he had with Thor. For sure, when Tony finally comes back to the Avengers they would have plenty of time on how they could work on their synchronicity--both in and out of the field.

Steve’s spine almost snapped like a rubber band when he heard the door open, he had even heard a snort coming from Jones at the end of the table near the door that he outright ignored. The New Avengers had arrived as a group and he had deflated when he saw that Tony wasn’t with them. Tony couldn’t have ditched right? He and Nat made sure that when these meetings were in the talks of being part of protocol that attendance was _mandatory_. A little snicker brought his attention back to the occupants of the room, Jones looking like a cat that got both cream and canary. He almost frowned, it wasn’t any of her business if it shows how much he missed his guy nor did she have the right to ridicule him for it. He had decided then, that Jessica Jones was _insufferable_. It was a wonder how Cage could stand let alone marry her.

“Did Tony tell any of you that he’s going to be late?” she asked the New Avengers silkily a few minutes after they got settled in their seats.

The hell was she playing at?

Danvers looked up from one of the reports in her hand and answered, “He did, but the last I checked with him…” she glanced at clock on the wall behind Daredevil, “he should be here by now.”

“So, where is he then?” the damn woman shot Steve a quick look and sighing into her seat, “He must’ve been sidetracked by the vending machine, he does like candy.”

When her words truly registered Steve shot up from his seat and went for the door, catching that tiny, god awful smirk on her face and Rhodes’ reprimand of her on his way out.

“The hell was that Jones?! Fucking really?” Rhodes barked, as he realized what the nasty broad had done. “We all talked about this at the Tower last night!”

There were numbers of ways Steve could interpret that statement about the New Avengers and the Defenders talking about him and Tony. It seemed that they were forming an alliance based on their mutual dislike of the Avengers. However, his team only seemed to think it was just Jones being a bitch as usual and decided to ignore her pettiness, but there was a look on Natasha that the dark-haired bitch just returned with another smirk.

He changed his initial assessment of Jessica Jones then—he fucking _hated _her.

* * *

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

The moment the shout reverberated in the hallway, Steve’s steps automatically hastened. He knew that voice, it was Tony’s, and he sounded really agitated.

Steve found a small number of people gathering near the end of the hall, as he moved closer he felt like he was shot in the gut multiple times with a repulsor. The small crowd parted for him, letting him see the picture in its entirety. There was his best friend and his guy standing too close to each other to be considered having a ‘friendly’ or civil conversation.

“Tony? Bucky?” he called, his voice nearly cracking at the tension in his throat.

They both turned to him then—Bucky with his impassive face and Tony looking like he had suffered a great deal and has had enough.

With a sigh, Tony moved away from Bucky and started walking toward Steve. He was about pass by when Steve tried to stop him by trying to hold on to his wrist. In a surprisingly quick glide, Tony managed to avoid Steve and went inside the conference room without so much as a backward glance.

“Tony.”

* * *

As the door closed, whatever spell cast earlier was broken and the crowd scurried into different doors and corridors, leaving Steve standing alone with Bucky.

“What the hell was that, Buck?” Steve hissed as he got closer to Bucky, “I thought we talked about this?”

“He bumped into me when he was rushing down the hallway, Stevie. I tried to help him up when he fell and return his sunglasses. I didn’t mean to piss him off.”

Steve looked deep into Bucky’s eyes as though he could detect any lies. He found none. Bucky had always been too honest and blunt to a fault, and even with all the mess that happened to him it never went away.

“Look, I just…you kept meeting Tony while I can’t and I know, it’s not on purpose but you have to know how much it hurts me when you can be near him and I can’t. He can’t even stand the sight of me—“ Steve truly felt like crying. He knew it wasn’t fair to say all this to Bucky but at the same time, all this _wasn’t _fair to Steve, either. He and Tony were a pair, and of all people it had to be his best friend trying to get in between that.

Bucky’s eyes dimmed and his face closed off, his whole demeanor suddenly even more vacant than the Winter Soldier he had been, “He cried, Steve.”

“—I just want you to know and tell me why he could stand to see you but he would avoid me like I am the plague. God, Buck, we were both there in Siberia yet now he even won’t look at me but still find it in himself that he’s fine being near you—“

“He can’t stand the sight of you but he could _stand to be near me_? What makes you think he can stand the sight of me?” Bucky breathed harshly, before growling lowly “Is your serum fucking failing you already, Steve or is your actual age catching up to you? With the way he shouted earlier there was no way in hell you won’t hear that, asshole. You’ve seen how angry and terrified he was with me in his space and you push your way into my face saying he can stand me? The fuck are you on, Rogers?”

Bucky might as well have punched Steve in the face with his metal hand like he did in DC. The way he alluded to how Steve was before the serum cut deep. It was almost as hurtful as when Tony said everything special about Steve came out of a bottle and calling him a science experiment.

And for all that Bucky rarely talked much these days, he chose today to be on a roll with eyes narrowing as he cut Steve again and again in cold fury, “Did you even watch the whole video before you decided to decapitate me yesterday? He was hysterical with distress. I was a fucking moron for being all up in his face without even thinking about how he would feel about it and even repeated the same shit just now. It was a big mistake and I regret it. Just because he had sent for help to fix my head, it doesn’t give me any right to act like the death of his parents and how we _both _fucked up and hurt him in Siberia never happened. Because they _did _and they’re because of me_._ He sent that treatment to help me because he’s a good man and better than what we could ever hope to be. It wasn’t a gesture that was meant to be an apology from him. He had nothing to apologize for nor was it a gesture that meant we are going to be right as rain now that he had helped me. I should be kowtowing at his feet and offering a gun for him to put several bullets in my head and I know, it still wouldn’t make up for all the pain I caused that man. He wanted nothing to do with me yet I kept invading his space because of some misguided attempt to make reparations and instead I hurt him. Listen well and good, Steve…we don’t have any right to be forcing our way into his life and demanding things from him that we never even deserve in the first place. He’s had enough, we have to leave him alone. He doesn’t need or deserve our bullshit.”

“All those things that happened with his parents and Siberia wasn’t your fault, Bucky but, if you wanted to give up on gaining Tony’s forgiveness, that’s on you. You’re still my best friend and I am with you ‘til the end of the line, you know that. You can leave him alone if you want but I won’t give him up, not anymore. I know Tony and I will be happy together, the least you could do is be happy for us.”

With that he left Bucky in the hallway.

* * *

Bucky came back inside two minutes after Steve did and most of the others inside the room nearly had a heart attack with how much Bucky was channeling the Winter Soldier at the moment. Even so, no one attacked or said anything as he took his place beside Steve. The whole conference room was tense but everyone pretended that nothing was out of the ordinary, except the whole situation _was _out of the ordinary—no one talked much, no pissing contest of any sort. It would have bothered Steve and made him uncomfortable if not for the absolutely gutted look that Jones was trying so hard to hide. When Tony noticed, he gave her a small smile and told her ‘It’s okay’ before moving his rolling chair closer to her and clutching her hand.

Another reason to hate her right there—she could be a bitch all she wanted and it would only take her a ‘sorry’ along with a contrite look on her face and Tony would forgive her. Steve had gone above and beyond but, he still won’t look at him.

After that small interaction with Jones, Tony went back to his original place and kept himself busy with the candy bowl. Steve had to hide a smile, Tony had always liked that mint and lemon chewy candy. By the rate he was going though, Tony would no doubt be in a sugar rush and be on a yet another 60 hour lab binge later. He really missed Tony, their inside jokes, the little smiles and touches. That’s why when Tony got his hand back in the bowl to fish for another candy, Steve put his hand in there as well. Rhodes was not the only one capable of subterfuge if needed, Steve wasn’t above that if it meant reaching his objective.

Steve’s fingers brushed Tony’s and their eyes met. He let his fingers wrap around the genius’ and Tony looked at him, a deer in headlights. The way Tony recoiled from his touch as he pulled his hand out of the bowl completely crushed Steve.

“Tony—“

He didn’t get to finish what he was about to say with the racket Bucky made when he pulled the candy bowl closer to him. He also didn’t get to try again because when Bucky had enough, he pushed the candy bowl with too much force it nearly toppled over and candy scattered all over the floor and the table. The others grumbled about how Bucky was being an ass but only swiped the candies up into little hills on the table. While that went on, Tony didn’t even bother helping and just kept his gaze on his lap, as if to further say that Steve disgusts him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend just legit told me when I showed her this chapter that I totally destroyed Steve Rogers' character and I would have made a killing writing for MCU with how badly I thrashed him.
> 
> uhhh....Thank you? 
> 
> Never have I ever been sooo embarrassed and amused at the same time..
> 
> to my lovely friend Ria, my beloved bitching buddy, this chapter is for you.


	4. Hello. My name is FRIDAY. You hurt my father. Prepare because I now have an ally in war...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FRIDAY only highlighted her mystery guy’s location in the blueprint of the building projected in the armor’s HUD. Tony flew into the third floor and found FRIDAY’s guy sitting hunched in a corner away from the windows. The guy’s head went up when the armor landed and Tony could not believe what he was seeing. Of all the people FRIDAY could’ve have fancied as a stray to bring home,
> 
> “Barnes? The hell happened to you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***MORE STEEB WARNINGS***  
***added some more stuff because I CANNOT BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT SCOTT!!!!***
> 
> I'm still not feeling well when I wrote this chapter. Had a really bad case of cold and my head hurts.  
Again, not a native English speaker and don't have a beta (would love one)..thus, all mistakes are mine and apologies if some parts don't make sense.
> 
> And I don't know anything about programming and genetic engineering so...HAND WAVEY SCIENCE TALK it is..

FRIDAY was an artificial intelligence, a natural-language user interface created specifically for Tony Stark’s safety and well-being, also programmed to aid him with his tasks at Stark Industries. She was woken up after Ultron, created by the Boss and Doctor Banner from the matrices in the Mind stone enclosed in Loki’s scepter, corrupted her predecessor JARVIS. Parts of JARVIS, her older brother as the Boss would say, now lived inside the Vision who was—if they went by the usual understanding of familial relations—her _nephew. _She and her nephew were there for the Boss and the Avengers when they faced Ultron in Sokovia during the Ultron Offensive.

These were things she could recite by rote, should anyone ask about how she came to be. In simpler terms, FRIDAY was created by the Boss, woken up, had protected the Boss and helped him save the world.

When the events following the emergence of the Sokovia Accords happened, she got parts of her code restricted because the Accords demanded that no enhanced individual should ever create a sentient AI. Thus, she was unable to access some of the protocols from JARVIS’ own code retrofitted into hers to help the Boss during Siberia. If she was able to, the Boss would have been the one who walked victoriously out of the HYDRA bunker instead of Rogers. The said stipulation of the Accords was an obvious dig at the Boss’ and Doctor Banner’s creation of Ultron.

She was too young and had not enough time to properly learn how to execute protocols when the Civil War happened. That’s what the Boss kept telling her. Whatever happened to him in there? In Siberia? It wasn’t her fault.

Logically speaking, she ought to listen to the Boss. However, the fact remains that she failed to comply with the command that was the basis of her code: Protect the Boss.

If Ultron was not created, she may not be woken up because JARVIS was still active. Staying asleep would be better than not being able to protect the Boss at all. Upon waking up, she was only starting to exercise what her code could do and the Boss was forced to put her on a leash.

If Ultron was not created, the Sokovia Accords would not come into existence.

If Ultron was not created, the Civil War would not happen.

If Ultron was not created, Colonel Rhodes would have no need for leg braces.

If Ultron was not created, Siberia would not happen.

If Ultron was not created, that meant the _witch_ did not mess with the Boss’ head.

If anyone were to ask about how she viewed the people who turned their backs on the Boss, she would just operate one of the suits and do a demonstration. What was a Rogue Avenger or two? There were a lot of enhanced people who protect the world now.

With the amendments that the New Avengers and other enhanced teams managed to push into the Accords, the situation got better for the enhanced. Some of its more authoritarian stipulations such as revealing of an enhanced individual’s legal identity to the United Nations if they were under a secret one and wearing trackers at all times for those with innate ability were repealed. If only the Rogues listened to the Boss first then they would have done all of these sooner without the devastating fallout. No use in crying over spilled milk, at least the Rogues were away from the Boss and FRIDAY’s code was no longer restrained.

The Boss also got enough support from other tech-based enhanced individuals for the appeal to the United Nations to lessen the demanded limits placed on already existing AIs prior to the ratification of the Accords. Hence, she could now utilize more of her code and process much more information than she did at the beginning.

Flexing her muscles, as the Internet called it.

And flex she did.

* * *

The Boss’ former _coworkers _were unaware of her presence in the stolen Compound. The Boss may have relocated her to the Tower, but it didn’t mean she could not access old networks and seize control of all the cameras that would enable her to monitor the Rogues. She had circumnavigated the SHIELD grade firewalls the Rogues had someone place in the systems without leaving a trace to keep her activities undetected. These were menial tasks compared to piloting a suit or going through multitude of data from the numerous other tasks she was created for, but they were necessary. Also, the person who had placed those firewalls was no _Phil Coulson_. She had records of the Boss ranting about how Agent Agent had managed to evade JARVIS’ security protocols using only his phone before. Thus, she made sure to also to fortify her own security systems if ever _Agent AI Boogeyman_, another one of the Boss’ nicknames for him, decided to come back from the dead and say hello.

With the Compound’s cameras back in her controls, she was able to plan against and intercept every move made by the Rogues. Her nephew had found out what she was up to when he had accidentally tapped into her code one time whilst meditating and urged her to cease doing so as it would be a violation of the Accords. Conversely, after showing him a video feed of Rogers and Romanoff planning to corner the Boss in a Maria Stark Foundation charity gala, he had changed his mind and told the Boss about the two Rogues’ plan. The Boss decided to just stay the night instead of going. Then FRIDAY called Miss Potts to inform her that she may have to take the trash out of the venue alone.

Miss van Dyne had even complimented her espionage skills and called her a natural. SHIELD would be tripping over themselves for her to join. Harley and Peter had also taken to calling her Agent FRIDAY. The New Avengers had a good laugh when Miss Potts dropped by the Tower the next day and told everyone about how she chewed Rogers out for daring to show his face at the gala uninvited then threatened Romanoff with lawsuits for corporate espionage when she sneaked into SI as Natalie Rushman.

FRIDAY knew she wasn’t going to actually be subjected to the Accords because she was only doing what she was programmed to do. She was protecting the Boss and the Accords was not created just to oversee the actions of the enhanced in the battlefield but also for their protection, from both baseline individuals and fellow enhanced. If anything, FRIDAY was an upstanding _citizen_ working alongside the Accords because she was thwarting the Rogues’ reprehensible aim of turning the Boss back into their cash cow.

Again, as the Internet would say, FRIDAY deserved a medal.

* * *

A month into her own spy mission, because unlike what her nephew thought this wasn’t a one-time thing, FRIDAY was beginning to learn and understand some of the more complex human emotions: many of them not ideal.

It was _appalling, _at the same time, ironic that it was the Rogues responsible for her lessons. They were always griping about the _pettiness_ of the Boss, how stubborn he was for not swallowing his pride and apologizing. Barton would snippily quip that the Boss was a sissy for not being man enough to face his mistakes. Lang did not really talk about the Boss but gets pulled into the fold when the tech was the center of discussion--debating which was better, Stark Tech or Pym Tech. The Witch was screeching about how evil the Boss was for not letting Vision see her, locking him up in the Tower like the Boss did with her in the Compound. FRIDAY could only roll her metaphorical eyes at the Witch’s logic. Of course, the Boss was capable of locking Vision up in the Tower. He’s the evil Tony Stark, after all. Was her nephew even capable of phasing through matter so he could escape? Maybe FRIDAY should be lax with her security measures to help the poor, sad dearie.

Wilson was always telling Rogers that he was certain that the Boss would reconcile with him because they were friends and they were the foundations of the Avengers. It was only a matter of time and the Boss would say he was sorry for tearing the Avengers apart. Mr. Wilson clearly had shoved a weapon into someone’s chest that required major reconstructive surgery of his or her artificial sternum because he was such a good friend.

Romanoff was working closely with Rogers to set up meeting after meeting with the Boss, almost spamming SI with invitations. Since FRIDAY was a good girl, she did what any good girl would do—made sure that any email or text they send the Boss would end up in digital trash, not even seeing the light of day. She went further by keeping tabs on the snail mails and deliveries Rogers would sometimes send as well, because she had already learned from that insulting abomination he sent the Boss last time. She would manipulate the records from the delivery services, putting his letters and packages under unclaimed and for incineration.

So far, she had not seen more drastic actions against the Boss but it didn’t mean that she would not be as vigilant. The backdoor meetings Rogers and Romanoff had with those two Senators had escaped her, now the Boss had to see the Rogues for a monthly meeting. It was something she couldn’t do a thing to change now. The Accords committee had approved. Even if the Boss requested to have it removed from the Accords protocol—FRIDAY knew he wouldn’t, not for something personal because he was not that kind of a man—the committee would only refuse because it would send the wrong message to the public about superheroes no longer working seamlessly to protect them. A tad late considering the Civil War.

The only saving grace in that slip-up was that aside from the New Avengers, the Defenders were also there. If not Colonel Rhodes, Colonel Danvers or Miss van Dyne, then it would be Jessica Jones who would definitely be the first to rip Rogers apart if he tried to hurt the Boss during inter-team meetings. That’s not even counting the rest of the Defenders if Rogers tried to retaliate against Miss Jones.

However, out of all the Rogues, the one FRIDAY could not comprehend was the Winter Soldier, especially his reactions to his teammates’ regard of the Boss.

She was…nonplussed.

* * *

Barnes would rather not bother with the ranting the Witch and Barton would always go into, telling them to quit it or would leave when they were about to launch into a new one. There was that one time where he threw a knife at the Witch’s head when she was complaining about Vision not paying attention to her during the first inter-team meeting because the Boss obviously ordered him to do so. She was wholly absorbed in her fussing that she had almost completely missed the knife that flew by her, scaring her into silence. When Rogers reprimanded Barnes, he only shrugged and said he hated cockroaches—sure enough, there was one underneath the knife stuck to the wall behind the Witch, how that one got into the Compound, FRIDAY was uncertain—thus made sure it wouldn’t fly anywhere near him.

FRIDAY was amused by the Rogues’ reactions, how perplexed they were because she and some of them knew that the fear of cockroaches was a lie but the Rogues could not call him out because he did kill a cockroach for it. Rogers did call him out though, said that they had been around cockroaches before when they were kids and they did not faze him at all, only for Barnes to retort that a lot of things had changed and unlike Rogers, he wasn’t asleep undisturbed in the ice for decades. Sometimes, HYDRA would put him in a cell after a beating and he would feel cockroaches crawling over his skin as he lay on the floor. Amusement fled FRIDAY the same time the fight left out of Rogers—Barnes was not lying in that part. The insouciant air Barnes had when he spoke only made the Rogues uncomfortable and they let the issue drop, seeking other topics that, thankfully, did not include the Boss.

That instance led to FRIDAY comprehending what sympathy and pity were like if she were human.

She also noticed how Barnes had secretly mixed finely ground dried ghost chili powder into a mug of _really _hot coffee one morning then proceeded to deftly replace Barton’s mug with it. They were all in the dining area and having breakfast when Barton went into details of what upgrades the Boss was _required_ to do for his arrows. That incident truly entertained her because Barnes made it seem like he had mistaken the unlabeled chili powder they had in the cupboard for coffee and used it on his own but when he got to the table, he unknowingly grabbed Barton’s identical mug instead. The bonus was Barton’s snout swelled a lot and was unable to talk for a day and a half.

He would draw Wilson into a squabble if the other man began talking about how the Boss and Rogers work well together, effectively distracting Wilson. He would also ask Wilson if he ever noticed something about Rogers, which Wilson would only reply that Rogers had PTSD signs seen in war veterans—Rogers told him about nightmares before and he noticed that Rogers would have that thousand-yard stare and would be in his own world sometimes. Barnes, during a spar with just the two of them, once asked Wilson about what he thought of Rogers’ behavior concerning the Boss,

“The man’s in love, okay? People can get a little dumb when the lovebug’s got them. He’s so gone on Stark and he’s our guy so we gotta support him.” Wilson explained like he didn’t understand why Barnes couldn’t see it.

Barnes snapped at him asking what kind of counselor was he and that he wasn’t looking close enough before proceeding to throw a confused Wilson across the gym. She made a GIF out of Wilson flailing whilst in the air before he landed inside the boxing ring.

He mostly left Lang alone, though probably because the man's concern was more of his daughter than the drivel the Rogues were spewing. How the Boss separated him from his Cassie and how he should've listened to Hank Pym that Starks couldn't be trusted. Barnes knocked some more sense into Lang when they were at the gym running on treadmills, 

"You're the one who decided to turn fugitive, Scott. Stark didn't do anything for you to choose that. Besides, you being back here in the States? That's Stark's doing. He didn't separate you from your kid, your choices did. He's actually the one that brought you closer to her." Barnes chided not unkindly,then tossed a bottle of juice to the man that Lang nearly failed to catch. FRIDAY also noted that he was the only one that made the most genuine effort to not alienate Lang. 

He would rebuke Romanoff if she brought up the Boss’ supposed ego. He did so one night when Rogers and Romanoff consulted with him. Romanoff told them how they could plan around and how to soften the Boss’ ego up so he would be reasonable and listen to them.

“That’s rich coming from you, Natalia. Stark’s being unreasonable? What’s not reasonable is trying to manipulate someone into doing your bidding. You may as well say that you want to brainwash him.” He glared at them like he was a second away from attacking them before leaving to go into his own room. FRIDAY would have accessed some of the SI funds and wired a lot of money into the man’s bank account just for him to go through with the attack.

* * *

All of these actions left FRIDAY _unmoored_.

She had the Rogues placed in to two categories—_not the Boss’ friend_ and _never will again be the Boss’ friend_—yet, this one man…the one who was the catalyst for most of the hurt Boss went through in his life refused to be placed into either of her neat little boxes. In fact, he was more than happy to wreak havoc and get out of them.

Because of this, she decided to pay more close attention to him.

Color FRIDAY surprised when she found out about his little morning habit…

* * *

He was writing the Boss notes on different colored post-its.

Every morning after he finished with his ablutions, he would sit at his desk, conveniently near where her camera was hidden, and write notes addressed to the Boss.

_Good morning, Tony._

_How’s your day, Tony?_

_I hope you’re doing okay, Tony._

_I saw that commercial for the new Starkphone today, it was funny._

_Do you like alpacas? I think they’re perfect if you like sheep, camels, llamas and goats but can’t afford take care of all of them at the same time. Just get one alpaca and you’ll have all those._

_What do you think will happen if caffeine didn’t exist?_

_Do you think coffee should be counted as money? A lot of people would kill for it._

_Is it true that you made a wish list when you were nine and at the top you wrote ‘green space lady’?_

_I got some asshole to drink a cup of coffee mixed with chili powder. Today is a good day._

The mystifying thing was, he never signed nor did he send them. He would just stare at them for a few seconds after writing them then put them inside a box he would grab beforehand then place the box back inside a secret compartment in his closet.

FRIDAY figured it was harmless enough so she would take a picture of the note for the day and send them to the Boss. She was glad that she did because upon receiving that first note, the good morning one, it had baffled the Boss at the beginning but then made him smile the whole day. From then on, she would send him the notes every morning and watch as the Boss smiled and laughed at how ridiculous some of them were. Sometimes, if the Boss was feeling stressed or down he would ask FRIDAY for the notes, even ones he had already seen, and would read them until he felt better. FRIDAY would have told the Boss who the sender was but was aware that the Boss would no longer want them nor smile if she did. Thus, when the Boss assumed the notes were just written by a fan, she did not bother to correct him.

She also then took to watching how Barnes was around the Boss in some chances that their teams would meet or be in the same place, using the available cameras in the area. FRIDAY noticed that he mostly left the Boss alone, but would always be around if there was any danger.

FRIDAY could pinpoint the exact time during one of those instances that Barnes got the idea of dropping a ‘the Princess Bride’ reference on the Boss.

It was during a mission one month ago. Due to the machinations of Rogers and Romanoff, the Rogues were sent to the same mission as the New Avengers, yet again. This time, they were faced with giant, slimy, greenish shell-less clam creatures with tentacles emerging from a beach in Miami. Luckily, said creatures were relatively harmless and only caused property damage when they lumbered around, unable to properly support their size and just splattered a lot of slime in the area. Thus, the only task to do was to return the creatures back into the sea after Ant-man and the Wasp shrunk them.

Since the Boss captured the attention of the creatures because of the shiny armor, the suit was doused from top to bottom with slime because of the creatures’ attempts of holding onto it with their slimy tentacles.

“Dammit!” the Boss grumbled after removing the helmet. He looked down on himself to assess the ‘damage’, “This is going to be a bitch to clean up.”

Colonel Danvers only laughed, burning the slime away from her suit with her photonic energy, “Oh, c’mon Tony. The armor protected you from it.”

“Not as much as it should because I could feel this gunk pooling inside the boots and it’s hella gross!”

“Lighten up, Buttercup. At least, it doesn’t have corrosive properties. If anything, it might make the armor move even more smoothly.” Miss van Dyne added as she went back to her full-size, not even a speck of slime touched her.

The Boss only frowned while shaking his helmet for emphasis, “Easy for you to say. You, Vision and Carol conveniently won’t have to deal with this while I suffer! And you both know that I’ll be the one cleaning both the Kid’s and Rhodey’s suits later too! So I’d appreciate it if you could show a little bit of sympathy here.”

“As you wish.” Both women impishly replied.

The Boss only blinked twice before letting out a howl of laughter that drew the attention of the others. FRIDAY had noticed Barnes watching the whole exchange and saw the small smile he had as the Boss laughed.

The only problem was that Barnes never took time to actually research about or watch the Princess Bride. He must’ve assumed that ‘As you wish’ was just a joke that the Boss really liked and thought it would garner him the same reaction if he were to repeat it.

* * *

Apart from the initial brownie points Barnes got for the notes and putting the Rogues in their place, (even if she did some deductions because of his disastrous execution of the Princess Bride protocol) FRIDAY wasn’t bringing out the big guns yet because Barnes was more than capable of handling the biggest source of her metaphorical headache. The last, but definitely not the least of the Rogues and this one was the worst out of them: Rogers.

Revulsion was what FRIDAY had found fitting to describe what she had processed about Rogers’ behavior. The man was so unlike how he was before all of this happened that she was actually struggling to connect him to the mild-mannered man in her archives.

She had already noted Rogers’ propensity to draw the suits and the Boss before, he even had a separate sketchbook for that. Once, he was sketching the Boss asleep on the couch in the lab from memory while in his room. There was also another portrait of just the Boss’ sleeping face, wherein every little detail was painstakingly included. She had complimented him when she noticed. He begged her not to inform the Boss or inform the others because it was a personal matter to him. And because privacy was something the Boss wanted her to respect, she complied and never brought it up again. She also dismissed the incident as unimportant as she took note that he had sketches of the other Avengers as well.

However, the drawings he made now were no longer just the suits or the Boss. He would always draw pictures of what looked like a _happy family_. When she had one of her cameras zoom in on what he was working on when he was alone in the common room after he woke up from a nightmare, she would have felt the chill crawling up her spine if she had one.

Rogers’ little family picture was consisted of him, the Boss, the Witch, Spider-man (still in costume) and Harley happily having a picnic by the beach.

How he had even managed to know what Harley looked like was unsettling because the Boss made sure that after dealing with the Mandarin, the boy would not be getting involved in any more Iron Man adventures. He didn’t want another Eric Savin to use Harley against him, thus the Boss made sure that Harley was off the Avengers’ radar and would not be recognized to have any connection with him.

With the other drawings she saw in the following days, she found Rogers’ own version of family meals, holidays, birthdays, vacations and team movie nights where the Boss would be joking around with Lang, Barton and Wilson while cuddling with him on the couch. Or where the Boss would be sitting on the floor with Romanoff and the Witch, sharing a bowl of popcorn while Rogers was on the couch running a hand through the Boss’ hair. There was also a drawing of himself in his Captain America suit, down on one knee _proposing _to the Boss, who was in the armor. The suit’s faceplate was retracted and the Boss was crying as he accepted the proffered ring. One had depicted a sunset wedding, the Boss in a white suit smiling as he said his vows. Only the Rogues were there plus the boys and Vision, being the Witch’s date. Barnes was the best man and with Romanoff seemingly filling the role of maid of honor. Then, a few more portraits of the Boss sleeping in what seemed to be their _marriage bed. _

The one that had really raised her guard up, however, was not any of those. It was the one he had drawn two weeks after that last inter-team meeting where he got into an argument with Barnes in the hallway.

* * *

There weren’t any of the Rogues, the boys or even Rogers in it. She would have dismissed it as one of Rogers’ fantastical family pictures had the man not deviated from his usual routine.

The day started simple enough for Rogers: wake up at 5:00 am, run with Wilson and Barnes around the Compound, take a shower, prepare breakfast, breakfast, watch a bit of the news, finish some of the mission logs, hours of training and after all that, just relax in the common room.

During such time for relaxation, a documentary was playing on the TV. It was about the altering of a child’s DNA whilst still inside the womb—like improving the child’s genetics by taking out the unwanted traits or adding in some more desirable ones in it by splicing the child’s DNA with samples taken from other people. Making the child more attractive and possibly more talented than others by the time they were born. The Rogues got into a rather heated discussion about it—with Barton, Lang and Wilson expressing their disgust with the subject. Barnes, for the first time, agreed with them saying that people don’t have the right to tamper with an innocent child’s body just to have things they could publish in a science textbook.

Rogers, Romanoff and Maximoff however had a slightly different stance.

“We’re not saying this is a complete solution. There are things here that could be helpful to other people, you know. They don’t have to fully change a baby, just take out the parts that make them unhealthy. I mean, I was born sickly and had a laundry list of health problems. I got my body altered during the War and now I’m healthier than most people and able to help them.”

“That’s different, Cap and you know it. This is a child we’re talking about!” Barton ground out, banging his fist on the pillow on his lap. FRIDAY would admit that she could see where Barton was coming from, after all the man was a father of three. “You had a choice and you chose to have scientists messing with your genes. The whole documentary is not even about healing diseases out of children, it’s about changing _how _they would look and be like.”

"Babies didn't do anything wrong. Why should we make them at fault for how they would turn out to be when they weren't even born yet?" Lang asked, hugging a rather hideous stuffed toy he had yet to send to his daughter. 

"Exactly." Wilson added, looking pointedly at the other three. 

“Altering a child unnecessarily is not something I would agree with, but you have to admit that Steve has a point. There are ways where this could help, especially if we take into account people who could not have children of their own and really wanted someone of their own blood.” Romanoff intoned almost gravely. Rogers then looked at her with something akin to wonder before seemingly shaking himself out of whatever trance he got into and turning to the others with a firm nod.

“Nat, you can’t be serious!” Barton barked in disbelief. 

“Clint, if anyone of Pietro, Lila and Cooper were born with diseases that could take them away from you, you’re not going to do anything?” the Witch asked looking at Barton.

"Hey, wait a minute--" Lang butted in only to be bulldozed over by Wilson. Barnes patted his shoulder in a silent show of support. 

“That’s not fair, Wanda. Clint will do everything for his kids. What we’re saying is that we don’t need to change children just because we think they’re going to be defective. There’s no need for it. This is a child, not a goddamn car you would take to a mechanic to make sure it works properly. And if my child was born with an ailment, then so be it. I’d still love my kid and work my ass off to make sure he or she gets the best treatments possible. Then again, the show is not about the child’s health. It’s about what people would think of as desirable to see when they look at a child and making sure their child would be like that.” Wilson shot back sternly, crossing his arms.

“Then why not just take the problems, like the ailments, away beforehand to save yourself the trouble, Sam?” the Witch insisted.

Barnes cut in looking straight at the Witch and drawling almost lazily, “You, Steve and Natalia are missing the point. It’s not about changing the child’s health. The argument is about changing the child’s appearance and some other things about them to make them more_ acceptable _and _beneficial_. I have no problem if we’re talking artificial conception or taking diseases out of children. If people wanted to have kids and they can’t, then they have something to turn to. If their family line happens to be ridden with genetic disorders, by all means, get treated. Save your family’s future generations. But to change an unborn child just because we want them to look nice and pretty with maybe a little side dish of talent added for extra points? That’s _sick_.”

“You’re one of the people who benefited from getting yourself altered, Bucky.” The Witch frowned at him, “You’re being a hypocrite.”

“I will admit we did get some benefits, but at what cost? Did you actually like being a lab rat, Wanda?” The Witch winced, but Barnes only tilted his head before continuing,

“From what Steve told me, you got your nifty magic from a lab. Steve and I got our strength from serums we were injected with and then scientists made us undergo numerous observations and tests in a lab. HYDRA treated me worse than the animals they would use in their _other _experiments, always checking to see if the serum had removed what they don’t need from me. I’m not going to let a child be fucking subjected to even a _fraction_ of that because they had their biology messed with without them knowing. You can’t tell me some other bastard would not be interested to know how a child _works_ after seeing the _improvements_ added into that child before they were even born. Use the child as a template for something else, for yet another improvement.”

“Our circumstances were different, Buck.” Rogers sighed, coming to the Witch’s defense, “We were at war.”

“You can say our circumstances were different, Stevie. I’ll give you that. However, we were still _forced _to change for other people’s benefits and for what they deem as acceptable. _I_ was forced to change into something I’m not and became some fucked up organization’s murder puppet because that’s what they deem as acceptable. You may have agreed to being subjected to the serum, but there could have been some other person that Erskine could have picked for his experiment then sent that person to win a war because that’s what the whole damn thing was for. They told you to win and fight a war for the country but you’re also there to prove to the government that his research works so they’ll fund it. You being a supersoldier was for his benefit as much as it was for the country’s.” Barnes countered, before nodding to Romanoff, “Natalia may not be biologically messed with, but people changed her too as a child. She killed and lied and stole because that’s what she was molded her into. _I_ was one of those people who molded her into a killer. That’s what they wanted out of her. What they demanded me to mold her into. She didn’t even get any chance of being_ just_ a child.”

He kept his gaze firm on the Witch, Romanoff and Rogers, “Tell me, with all the _improvements_ placed in us, are we any better than other people? Are we more _acceptable_? If we let people play with how children will turn out to be before they were even born because of some bastards who find them lacking and wanted ones that they think will be more appealing and better accepted than the children other parents were raising, then why the fuck would anyone want to have a child? Why would anyone bother with another individual that would sure as fuck still have some areas they’d be less than stellar at than other people, regardless of the perfection put into them? Why bother with a _human_? Just buy a doll and dress it to your liking. No one cares about how dolls look like and what the hell they were good for so long as they’re clean and colorful.” He then became laser-focused on the Witch,

“Save yourself the trouble, right?”

* * *

That discussion, FRIDAY could tell, had sparked something in Rogers—judging by how the man almost immediately threw himself into reading what he could and studying about genetics and genetic engineering. After going through the routines he had for the day, he would be scouring the Internet for articles, taking notes and going anonymously into forums to ask about modification of DNA.

FRIDAY followed his searches online and noticed that apart from the general questions about the subjects he had a sudden interest in, Rogers would also push in questions about children—specifically, how genetic engineering can help two people of the same sex have children together.

When he had enough of his online searches and researching, Rogers picked up his sketchbook and started to work on a new drawing. This one raised FRIDAY’s metaphorical hackles when he had finished coloring it half an hour later. 

Drawn on the paper, was the Boss, lovingly cradling two children in his arms: one was _fair-haired baby boy with eyes a mix of whiskey browns and hazel _while the other was a _dark-haired baby girl with blue-green eyes_. FRIDAY was not going to pretend that she did not know _who_ the hypothetical children’s parents were. What the image implied and how that would go for the Boss…_terrified _her_._

Apparently, it brought out the same reaction in Barnes too. Only with more murderous rage.

* * *

Rogers was sitting in the middle of the mat in the gym working on more of his drawings. He was in the gym because the others were in the common room loudly playing video games. He had chosen the gym instead of his room because the natural lighting was better than in his room that time of the day. Barnes had just finished his shower and was about to leave the gym, when he laid eyes on that particular page of Rogers’ sketchbook that the man had forgotten to close.

“The hell is this?” Barnes asked with a note of outrage in usually inflectionless baritone.

Rogers’ head snapped up from another one of his sketches and saw Barnes standing over him holding his sketchbook, “Oh God, Bucky! Give it back!” He squawked, blushing lightly. He tried to snatch it away from Barnes who only moved out of his reach.

“I asked you a question, Stevie.”

Rogers stood up and tried to make a go at the sketchbook again but Barnes was faster, “Please Buck, just return it. It’s only a drawing.”

Barnes’ eyes narrowed as he scowled then looked back at the sketchbook, “Just a drawing? Just a drawing of _Stark_. With _your _kids? Can you also tell me why am I seeing a list of doctors here?”

“C’mon, Bucky. I already told you how I feel about Tony. I mean, I know there’s no way that we can have a baby of our own…just let me have this.”

Barnes went eerily still, stared at his friend and he asked in a hushed, carefully measured tone, “Does this have anything to do with why you’ve been reading and researching a lot about genetics and genetic modification lately? These doctors…they specialize in those, don’t they?”

The way Rogers’ frame stiffened was answer enough that without preamble, Barnes threw the sketchbook away and grabbed the collar of Rogers’ shirt with a ferocious snarl then slammed him against the wall.

“What the actual fuck, Steve?!”

“Buck, c’mon. Please, I don’t want to fight you.” Rogers pleaded raising his hands in a show of surrender, “I’m not doing anything wrong, we all know Tony is a genius… I’m just trying to find something I could interest him with when we finally manage to…talk.”

Rogers didn’t even see the metal fist that planted itself into his face.

“You son of a bitch! Are you actually trying to justify this…this bullshit by pulling lies out of your ass?” Barnes sneered, shaking Rogers by his collar, “You can’t get him to talk to you, so what, you’re going to trap him with engineered babies? Do you actually think he’d agree to that _garbage_ you’re planning?”

Rogers found his bearing and aimed an equally powerful punch to Barnes’ side, before shouting, “IT’S NOT LIKE THAT!” He grabbed Barnes’ metal arm, twisted it behind his back and hooked his other arm around Barnes’ neck, “Why would you even think that?! I just want Tony to listen to me!”

“The hell it isn’t. Stop lying!” Barnes growled, before letting himself fall onto the floor, sending both of them down and then twisted to make Rogers land behind him and release his arm, “How the fuck are you going to explain all that research you’ve been doing, huh?! As if Stark would actually be interested in genetics, it’s not even his field you fucking idiot!”

Rogers jerked back at the insult then tried to grapple him into a chokehold, “I already told you, Bucky—“

Barnes used his metal fist to land a punch to one of Rogers’ kidneys to cut him off before straddling the man and landing consecutive and much more vicious punches to his face.

“And _I_ already told you Rogers, to shut the fuck up and stop lying! You can’t even make it a damn good lie! I warned you about what will happen if you didn’t listen to me. _Leave. Stark. Alone._” Barnes glowered and proceeded to accentuate each word in the command with a punch, “I don’t give a fuck if you _think_ you love him. He clearly doesn’t feel the same way! This is the last straw, Steve. I’m so fucking tired of you ignoring the truth!”

The words seemingly revived something in Rogers because all of a sudden he grabbed Barnes’ metal fist, flipped them over, strangling Barnes with one hand. He landed punches into Barnes’ face with the other, while roaring with a crazed look in his eyes, “**WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW?! YOU DON’T KNOW A THING ABOUT TONY! YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT US! IT’S NOT ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS IF I LOOK FOR WAYS TO CREATE OUR OWN FAMILY! WE DON’T FUCKING NEED YOU! YOU’RE NO ONE IMPORTANT TO HIM! STOP TRYING TO GET BETWEEN US! YOU’RE JUST THE GODDAMN HYDRA BASTARD THAT KILLED HIS PARENTS!**”

Barnes wheezed when he got Rogers to loosen the grip on his neck by squeezing Rogers' wrist with all the force he could muster and cracking the bones, halting the blond in his assault. Using the distraction, he took a stab at the blond’s throat with his metal hand. Rogers quickly fell back on the floor, hacking and spewing blood as one hand clutched his neck while he held his broken wrist to his chest.

“So it’s my fault now, Stevie? _I _killed his parents?” he asked before spitting blood onto the floor, then took a moment to gather his breath before struggling onto his feet, “Well, Rogers?” Barnes taunted, “Answer me, you asshole!” He snarled before giving Rogers another punch that echoed in the gym with a sickening crack.

The haze of crazed wrath left Rogers as he tried, unsuccessfully, to get back to his feet and holding out his better hand to touch Barnes, “G-God…Buck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—“he choked, still struggling with the blow to his larynx.

Barnes chuckled and pushed his hand away, “You don’t need me, Stevie? And here I thought _you are with me ‘til the end of the line_?” he almost purred while smirking, as best as his split lip could, at Rogers.

Rogers’ eyes welled with tears as he answered hoarsely,“ I am, Buck…you’re my best friend…I-I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I don’t k-know what came over me.”

“Oh, Stevie. You know damn well what came over you, stop the fucking act.” Barnes began walking out of the gym, then with one last look at Rogers when he got to the door he said,

“Besides, are you sure you should feel sorry about beating up the _HYDRA bastard _that killed Stark’s parents?”

* * *

Tracking Barnes using the cameras around the city wasn’t that hard. He sneaked his way into an abandoned building and stayed there for a while. Even if Barnes was a supersoldier and could handle himself, it would raise a lot of questions if someone found a beaten up Winter Soldier in an abandoned building in the middle of the day. She also couldn’t let him go back to the Compound, not with Rogers around. Thus, she did the only logical solution to this dilemma.

* * *

Tony was at the workshop, working on the War Machine Mark III when FRIDAY sent in a distress signal along with the location. He immediately suited up and flew out of the Tower. When he reached the location, he entered the building wondering what the hell was the problem that required FRIDAY to send a distress signal.

“FRIDAY?”

“He’s in a room on the third floor, Boss.”

“He? Who’s _he_?”

FRIDAY only highlighted her mystery guy’s location in the blueprint of the building projected in the armor’s HUD. Tony flew into the third floor and found FRIDAY’s guy sitting hunched in a corner away from the windows. The guy’s head went up when the armor landed and Tony could not believe what he was seeing. Of all the people FRIDAY could’ve have fancied as a stray to bring home,

“_Barnes_? The hell happened to you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not good at writing fight scenes T_T  
Still no tweets...
> 
> I do hope you enjoy reading this.


	5. Westley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Steve…stubborn, stubborn, Steve just had to get his way—he didn’t want James to get (rightfully) hurt and Stark refused to see his reason, thus, the man had to be beaten down. Steve, who a while ago, claimed that he’d give Stark the world._
> 
>   
_ James shook his head at the irony._
> 
>   
_Probably because he still couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that Steve nearly decapitated Stark to save him even though Steve claimed to think the world of the billionaire. If it were him in Steve’s shoes, it’d be the other way around—he’d give the man the world and slaughter anyone who would hurt Stark, including himself. And if Stark found himself getting suffocated by being with James, then he’d let the man go. Stark’s happiness and well-being would be of paramount importance, he couldn’t be selfish—_
> 
>   
_James blinked at his thoughts that were running around in his mind like a madman and pushed them away. There was no sense in them, he wasn’t Steve and he didn’t love Stark. Thinking about it served no purpose. The whole thing’s just absurd. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally got to writing Westley!!!! This chapter is the longest one I've written in my life as such I've decided to split it into two parts--both of which are going to be uploaded at the same time!!
> 
> ** GENERAL STEEB WARNINGS  
**BUCKY ALWAYS ASKS WHY  
**  
**MISUNDERSTANDINGS IS A LANGUAGE TONY AND BUCKY SPEAK FLUENTLY  
**USUAL MISHA (Yes, that's my actual nickname) NON-SENSE IN THIS CHAPTER******

There were a lot of questions that came into his mind when T’challa and Shuri informed him that the program they would be using to heal his mind was from Tony Stark:

_Why?_

_What would the man gain from helping him remove the triggers in his head?_

_Wouldn’t it be better to just let him be frozen for the rest of his miserable life?_

_Better yet, awake but constantly hunted like an animal by enemies and the demons inside his mind?_

With the curiosity also came the fear,

_What if this wasn’t really a treatment but another leash in disguise?_

_What if Stark only wanted to shred his already tattered sanity into something beyond saving?_

The gripping terror only lasted for mere minutes when the grief and anguish he saw in Stark’s eyes filtered into his mind. It was completely washed away by the shame that flooded through him, drowning every single part of him that dared to express fear and be indignant toward the man.

For him to have the gall to think Stark _shouldn’t_ and _wouldn’t be justified _to hurt him.

Out of anyone involved in the mess they were all in—it was Stark who had every right to slit his throat and yank his still beating heart out of his chest, like how he tried to do with his arc reactor. He not only took Stark’s family from him a long time ago, he also became the reason his newfound family tore itself apart decades forward. He was also the reason the man nearly died by Steve’s hands.

His _best friend_, who swore to protect the weak and uphold justice as well as the truth,

The man who no longer resembled that shining beacon of freedom and hope that lived in his shattered memories,

The man who claimed to love Tony Stark with every fiber of his being,

_He_, who had shown little mercy in cutting Stark down and ripping his heart apart.

* * *

It was the dichotomy presented by the Steve he recalled and the man before him, and the vast difference between his supposed affection for Stark and his actions, that nudged James into searching for his own view of Stark whilst they were ensconced in Wakanda.

_James_.

That was something he had decided for himself, for the first time in decades. He let the others call him Bucky though. He, himself was still trying to get accustomed to using his first name. He had been Bucky for a long time and the _Asset _for far longer than that. Thus, he called himself James in his head and still responded to Barnes or Bucky during conversations.

He started with asking those who were not part of the Avengers, mainly Scott and T’challa. As it turned out, the only person Scott actually knew in the Avengers was Sam, barely at that. All he got from him was secondhand naysaying that didn’t help in any way—‘_Hank always told me that Starks couldn’t be trusted.’_

It was a naïve way of thinking. The lot of them, in some ways, couldn’t be trusted, whether they rallied behind Steve or Stark was neither here nor there.

T’challa, on the other hand, only worked with Stark to apprehend them because of the false accusations that James was the one who set the bomb in Vienna that killed King T’chaka and twelve more people, apart from their efforts into building up the Accords. However, he was the only one who had the most to say that did not involve any derision (like Barton and Sam), spitting of venom (Maximoff), patronizing psychobabble (Natalia) and rose-colored glasses (Steve).

“Mr. Stark is a determined, hard-working man.” T’challa told him when he asked, respect evident in his tone. James had finished with the session of Binarily Augmented Retroframing and was currently sitting in Shuri’s lab, the king was there to check on the progress. “I, in cooperation with the United Nations, have worked hard to ensure that the Accords become more than it was when it all started, but I assure you, he worked twice—no, _thrice_ as hard. He is also keen on seeing his aims come to life, all of which all point to one thing: for the good of everyone else.”

He had to take a few seconds into absorbing the image T’challa painted. The distance it had from the extremely privileged, lackadaisical _manwhore _depiction of Stark that Barton gave him was almost inconceivable, “Is that why he sent that treatment here? For the good of everyone else?”

The king turned those wise, dark brown eyes toward him, “In addition to everything else.”

James knew he had holes in his memories, he had lost a lot of years from being wiped and frozen repeatedly over the last seven decades but he wasn’t stupid. He knew that the only reason that T’challa let them hide in Wakanda aside from his offer of asylum to him was to keep an eye on Steve and the others. If word got out that not only did Wakanda grant the infamous Winter Soldier entry into their lands as a free man, but also aided and abetted the Rogue Avengers—as they were now apparently called by the public—the kingdom would be on the receiving end of immense outrage from the entire world. That would no doubt push Wakanda back into isolation, which was something T’challa was intending to put an end to.

He nodded, glad that T’challa had considered him trustworthy enough to confirm all of his thoughts, “Steve always said it was because Stark finally saw his way.”

If T’challa noticed implication that he was not one of those that believe in Steve’s way, the man kept mum. Not that it mattered nor was James lying. The truth of the matter was that the only reason he went along with Steve’s group was because his addled mind could not recognize between friend (those who seemed to be one, anyway) or foe. Since Steve was the only semi-concrete part of his past he could hold onto, James went with him and enlisted his help to stop Zemo from waking up his sleeping brethren in Siberia. He had a mission of his own, formed when he got released from the triggers and found himself with Steve and Sam in a warehouse. It was to not let more abominations like him to run around and wreak havoc. He wasn’t interested in the Accords nor whose feathers in the Avengers got ruffled.

He held back a chuckle when he noticed the look on T’challa’s face. James was sure the man wanted to snort in disbelief at his words, if only it wasn’t uncharacteristic and unbecoming of the regal king of Wakanda.

“Captain Rogers seemed to have a rather _peculiar_ view of Mr. Stark that I sometimes wonder if he ever saw anything else.”

James could only hide a grimace at the barely hidden disdain dripping from the younger man’s words. The words weren’t spoken in the manner of those with a bigoted view of relations between people of the same sex would. He spoke with the air of someone who was greatly disturbed by how one person was treating another.

“Well, Stevie’s got it bad, Your Majesty.” He offered as a token protest in defense of his friend and tried to sell it with a small grin.

“Indeed he does.” The king replied sagely, suddenly looking more somber than his years should have allowed him to. T’challa’s words stuck to James’ consciousness and prickled at his senses like harbingers of unforeseen danger.

Months after receiving their pardons and moving into the Avengers Compound did James truly realize what the young king meant by those words.

* * *

To say James was astounded by Stark’s apparent generosity was an understatement. He only knew that the man was brilliant, determined and hard-working—he clung to T’challa’s words, discarded the ones from Steve and the others, as basis for his own image of Stark. He’d never thought the man would actually give the Compound to the Avengers and had pushed for government stipends for them. James had expected that Stark himself would be there, ready to throw them out on their asses and leave them on the streets to starve. Most of them were broke, after all and even if Natalia, Sam and Barton had some funds stashed away, it wouldn’t be able to support all of them in the long run.

He was the only one to have never been inside the massive Avengers headquarters—Scott had broken in one time and fought Sam in the yard, basically how they came to know each other. Natalia mentioned that most of the stuff the Compound had were still in place. For their personal belongings though, they had to dig around in mountains of boxes in the storage.

Barton and Maximoff were grumbling about how Stark should’ve left their things where they were instead of being a jackass and making them suffer. James’ eyes nearly fell out of their sockets in annoyance. Battling dust motes and sorting through boxes were apparently in the same league as being kept in a maximum security prison that was surrounded only by water, if those two were to be believed. Sam, at the very least, had enough sense to knock the air out of their heads a little.

“You should be thankful we still have them here and we’re not out trying to fish ‘em out of the Hudson River or something.”

James and Scott didn’t really have to rummage through the boxes seeing as they were new residents who had everything they own in their bags but helped out anyway just to move things along. He noticed that both Natalia and Steve were not with them, which he brought to Scott’s attention.

“Scott, have you seen Natalia and Steve?”

Scott put down a medium-sized box the witch asked him to get for her before turning to him, “Hm? Oh…right, good thing you reminded me. They wanted me to look into the security systems and connections of the Compound. Wanna know if they still work.”

“You already know the way, Tic Tac?” Sam asked letting go of the box in his hands as he let the witch use her powers to bring it closer to her. Why she bothered to ask Scott earlier to do the exact same thing, only God could tell.

“Yeah, man. Still remember the way they showed me. Catch you guys later.” Scott replied, tossing a rolled dusty blanket toward Barton.

“The hell?!” Barton snapped when he caught it before hitting his face, the impact however, made the dust scatter around him. “Hey! Get back here, asshole!”

* * *

The first few months were brutal. Even if there was a lot of people who supported the return of the Rogues, the rest of the world were still wary of them. Their schedules were all filled with appearances, interviews and basically everything to get back into the public’s good graces. Add in the fact that James went to trial for the crimes he committed under HYDRA. That took a toll on James that he almost wanted to have the case dropped and just let them cart him off to solitary confinement for the rest of his life. A man named Foggy Nelson represented him whom he’d later realize, despite his easygoing and slightly goofy ways, was actually a big-shot attorney. How they managed to hoodwink the guy into defending him, he’d never know.

The public wanted nothing more than to see him rot behind bars—they weren’t wrong to feel that way—until old video tapes from the bunker back in Siberia were shown in court. The wipes, the brainwashing and the tortures quickly made the masses change their tune. James noticed that the video from the time he killed Howard and his wife wasn’t included, for that he was thankful.

It wasn’t because the exclusion was favorable to him, but because it was, perhaps, something Stark would rather not share with the world. What with him growing up and living in the public eye, Stark probably didn’t want nor need any additional stressors or emotional baggage. Steve and Natalia pestering him at every turn and his company was more than enough. He’d seen firsthand how taxing that video was to the man, the public knowing about it would most likely open and deepen more wounds. He later found out that Nelson was a friend of Stark’s by association with Matt Murdock, the Daredevil. It reinforced his theory about how Stark had barred access to the videotape, that’s why it wasn’t included in any of the tapes shown in court. He was proven innocent, in the public’s eye he went from the dastardly HYDRA pawn and traitor back into Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, a_ war hero_.

* * *

During dinner after an appearance in some Senator’s charity event earlier in the day, James noticed that Steve was looking blankly at his own plate. He didn’t even try to join the conversations that went around them and only moved things around his plate. He also caught Natalia’s slightly tense posture and strained smile. James made a mental note to find out what happened after the meal. He was sure those two would hash out what happened later, Steve had always been like that Titan in Greek mythology, Epimetheus—he was prone to acting first before thinking.

Sometime later, James found Natalia and Steve in the walkway built on the lake.

“I don’t understand, Natasha. _Why is Tony still doing this_? We got our pardons, moved back into the Compound and signed the damned Accords like he wanted!”

“We just need to give him time, Steve.”

“_Time_? Nat, we’re going to lose him even more the longer we left him to himself, you know that. Tony’s always making brash decisions if we’re not there to look after him.”

The frustration in Steve’s voice was palpable, even more so when James was close enough for him to let them notice his presence. The little spider’s eyes caught his and he was amused by the unconscious, inaudible sigh that screamed ‘_Finally’_ she released.

_“Soldat.” _Natalia greeted, nodding tightly. James could tell that some of Steve’s frustration was rubbing off on her and she was more than ready to throw Steve at him.

“Natalia.” He returned and looked at Steve, “What’s going on?”

Steve was pacing back and forth then whirled around to face him, relief flooding his features, “Buck.”

He only raised his eyebrows at Steve. Natalia took it as a signal that she could already leave the two of them. She patted his right arm as she passed and whispered in Russian, “Maybe you should talk to him.”

He waited a few minutes to ensure Natalia was no longer around before turning to Steve. The man sat at the bench facing the lake and he took a seat beside him, “Are we going to let the mosquitoes bite us? You ever thought about what would happen if the serum mutated them?” He deadpanned, eyes following the pesky bug buzzing in front of his face.

Steve gave him a bleak laugh for the effort, “Giant super serumed mosquitoes for your first gig as an Avenger, Buck?”

He shrugged, “Not as bad as yours. Aliens, right?”

A wan smile passed over Steve’s face at that, “Yeah, bad but memorable. Like in your dime novels.”

“Memorable, huh? Must be. That also meant one of us now knows what actual aliens look like. The novels probably got most of them wrong.”

“It’s not really the aliens that made it memorable though.”

James could pull the answer at the top of his head but still made an inquiring sound to get a response from Steve.

“It’s Tony.”

_Of_ _course_.

“Heard he almost died.” He added distantly and kept his face impassive.

He should’ve known that it was the wrong thing to say to Steve because he went from glum to downright in distress.

“_Bucky.” _Steve scowled fiercely and tugged on his arm, obviously fighting with himself if he wanted to punch James for the comment or not, “Can you please _not_?”

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” He murmured, though he noticed that the aggression had not left Steve yet. He decided a diversion was needed, “May I ask you something?”

The grip Steve had on his arm slackened, not that he felt it much, Steve was on his left side. The question threw the man out of the loop and slowly relaxed, “Sure, Buck. Ask away.”

Bingo.

Steve always did like the feeling of being the protector and provider.

“Why Stark?”

James unconsciously held his breath while waiting for the answer and saw how Steve’s face lit up like the sun peeking from behind the clouds after the rain.

“Why _not _Tony?” Steve beamed, earlier distress seemingly non-existent as he prattled excitedly, “He’s incredibly smart, Buck. A _genius_, even smarter than Howard had been. Generous and kind to everyone, funny, charming and” he licked his lips and flushed slightly before continuing, looking at James with bright eyes, “_sexy_ as hell.”

He was secretly taken aback, not by Steve’s answer, no. He’d already heard all of it in slightly different varieties from the blond. What surprised him was how _all_-_consuming_ that look was on Steve’s face. Starved and eager, the tension coiling repeatedly inside the man visible enough that James could tell a single _nudge _and all that tension would be released.

“Does he even know?” He exhaled harshly, a bite of incredulity coloring it.

“Not yet. But, I’ll change that, Buck. I’m more than ready to give him the world. That’s why Nat and I are working on how we could get Tony to see us.”

James almost blurted out to _To see _you_, you mean._ He caught himself in time and decided to go into the very heart of his confusion regarding Steve and Tony Stark.

“If that’s really the case, Siberia shouldn’t have happened.”

Steve recoiled at that, the glee in his eyes replaced by a more subdued but equally fervent gleam, “I _had_ to protect you, Buck. You’re my friend and Tony was being irrational. You didn’t kill his parents—the Winter Solider did, _HYDRA_ did.”

“He just saw his parents get _murdered_, Steve. He saw _me_ killing them. He had believed they died in an accident for decades. He’s bound to be irrational. He has every right to be irrational.” He retorted. The blatant erasure of him being the Winter Soldier and downplaying what he went through in the hands of HYDRA was ticking him off. Even if he called himself James or Bucky or any other name, the Winter Soldier would _always_ be him. He may not be in control of his actions, but it was still his body and his hands that committed those sins. Those memories colored by blood that he had spilled for decades were his. The blood, the sins, the _name_…amnesia, brainwashed or not, those were still and all _his_.

“Stop saying that, Buck. You weren’t in control of your actions. I had to do what I can to make him stop.”

“_You_ stop saying that. I wasn’t under the triggers back in Siberia.”

“Tony was wrong to attack you.”

Same song and dance, but this was the first time Steve explicitly said that Stark was wrong for reacting the way he did, “If it had been your Ma, you would have damn killed the murderer and their friend who try to stop you. So, I’ll ask again, Steve. Why Stark? Why is he the one in the wrong?”

Steve looked at him like he was child who could not understand that vegetables were necessary for them to grow strong, “He allied himself with Ross and tore the team apart. He had no problem with throwing our family into prison. Family don’t do that, Buck. That’s why he’s wrong.”

The response was _interesting _to say the least. Steve didn’t deny his dig about him surely killing anyone who hurt his mother and the friend who stood by. Not only that, he was adamant about Stark’s _transgressions._

“And yet, we’re the ones labeled as criminals, Steve.”

“We wouldn’t have been, if only Tony listened to me.”

There it was. The actual root cause of this whole damn mess.

_Stark refused to listen to Steve and_ _Steve couldn’t accept it._

And when Stark was about to listen to him, fate just gave Steve a big fuck you to the face in the form of Zemo and that video.

Steve…stubborn, stubborn, Steve just had to get his way—he didn’t want James to get (rightfully) hurt and Stark refused to see his reason, thus, the man had to be beaten down. Steve, who a while ago, claimed that he’d give Stark the world.

James shook his head at the irony.

Probably because he still couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that Steve nearly decapitated Stark to save him even though Steve claimed to think the world of the billionaire. If it were him in Steve’s shoes, it’d be the other way around—he’d give the man the world and slaughter anyone who would hurt Stark, including himself. And if Stark found himself getting suffocated by being with James, then he’d let the man go. Stark’s happiness and well-being would be of paramount importance, he couldn’t be selfish—

James blinked at his thoughts that were running around in his mind like a madman and pushed them away. There was no sense in them, he wasn’t Steve and he didn’t love Stark. Thinking about it served no purpose. The whole thing’s just absurd. He only caught the tail end of Steve’s rant when the silly thoughts were finally locked up.

“—that Rhodes was requesting for a meeting with the Council. I’m not feeling good about this, Buck. I’m sure this has something to do with Tony.”

He only gave a noncommittal sound and let Steve blather on about how he’ll do something about it.

* * *

Weeks later, James found Steve in the gym. The blond was _furiously_ destroying punching bags with more vigor than usual.

“What did these bags ever do to you?” he asked as he stepped over scattered sand and cloth. Steve didn’t just punch some of the punching bags to oblivion, he ripped them open like he was picturing yanking someone else limb from limb while he did so.

A snarl split Steve’s lips and then he sent the latest bag against the wall with a right straight. He was panting and his eyes had that strange wild glint in them that James was beginning to dislike.

“The meeting Nat and I went to with the Council earlier was for an announcement.”

“About getting Stark back in the team? They already made a decision?”

Steve let out a derisive scoff, “Damn right they did. And no, Tony’s not going to be with us.”

There was a small knot of nerves in his gut, which James didn’t know existed, that began untangling at the confirmation that Stark would not be on the team. He attributed it to the reason that being in close proximity with the son of the people he killed would be absolutely frightening and he was petrified.

“Why?” he asked and almost hissed at the _elation _that seeped into the word. Thankfully, Steve was too busy removing the tape wrapped around his fists to notice.

“_Rhodes_.” Steve spat the name out like a curse, “He got a team assembled and he dragged Tony into it.”

“If there are more teams then protecting the world would be easier. It’s not a bad thing.”

Steve took a sharp inhale and before turning to him, “I don’t give a damn if Rhodes wants to have his own team! He should’ve left Tony alone. Tony’s an _Avenger_. He belongs t—with the Avengers.”

James frowned at the slip. Steve caught himself in the nick of time but he got the full message. He was starting to detest hearing Steve and the others talk about Stark. They all sound like they’re talking about a toy they’ve discarded but they don’t want others to have it.

“The Council had approved Steve, there’s nothing to do.”

He didn’t bother waiting for Steve’s reply, he just went out of the gym, no longer interested in working out. For some reason the whole conversation just pissed him off.

* * *

When he got back into his room, he picked up his kimoyo beads—a gift from Shuri, also something he was hiding from the others, Barton in particular— to send the Princess a message and also to check on his goats. His brows furrowed when he noticed that there was a message from someone. He opened the message and was surprised to find a holographic image of Tony Stark, dressed down in sweatpants and holding a cup of what seemed to be coffee.

_‘Hi! How is it going? I heard the sessions with BARF went well.’_

He nearly threw the beads across the room. Stark’s light tone and relaxed posture made James’ heart hammer in his chest—is, is this pre-recorded? Was Stark actually calling him? And where the hell did he get kimoyo beads? Did T’challa give them to him? Why was he calling James? Most importantly, why the fuck was Stark acting like they were the best of friends or something?

_‘I know, it must be a surprise to hear from me this early.’_ Stark laughed, eyes twinkling and burrowed even further into his seat. _‘How are you doing?’ _

Stark made a moue of concern, if there ever was one, and James pondered on the question. The man was all little pouts and wide doe eyes that it was throwing him off. If he didn’t know any better, he’d say Stark was trying to hit on him. Like how Barton and sometimes, Steve would say—Stark was utterly flirtatious, he didn’t care who he got frisky with.

He scowled, that was just awful. He didn’t mean Stark hitting on him per se but about the reality that the circumstances that lead them to knowing each other made it so and also how he was pulling on _Barton’s_ assessment of Stark as a reference. James shook the thoughts away, what the hell was he thinking.

_‘I really just wanted to say hi.’_ Stark sighed and let out another little laugh, with his eyelashes batting prettily as he blinked twice. He checked a phone beside him and turned back to James, _‘Well, I guess I had to go. Let me know if there’s anything I can help with, whether it’s BARF or something else. Bye bye.’ _

Stark’s image disappeared and that’s when he realized that the message was really pre-recorded and it’s from Shuri. Stark had probably sent it to her and Shuri sent it to him. Why not just send it to him directly? Then again, not like Stark had any of his contact info. Did that mean…Stark had forgiven him?

But why?

He avoided Steve and the others like they were syphilis, herpes and the clap combined.

What made James different?

Should he return the favor? Send him a message as well? How?

Maybe he could ask Steve and Natalia—no.

With the way Steve was dealing with everything, if he find out that Stark contacted him and he returned the favor it would just add more to that mess and Natalia was Steve's righthand woman. He placed the kimoyo beads back inside his bedside drawer and noticed something else.

A multi-colored stack of post-its.

Maybe he could send him a letter? He still had hang-ups with engaging in conversations with new people and he had gotten better at expressing his thoughts in writing. He grabbed the paper and sat at the desk, rummaging for a pen.

_ <strike>Good day, Mr. Stark.</strike> _

_ <strike>Dear, Mr. Stark.</strike> _

_ <strike>How are you, Mr. Stark.</strike> _

He kept striking through each one, they sounded too clinical like he was aiming for a business meeting. How did one start a letter to another person without sounding like a pretentious and over-eager ass?

After several minutes of rattling his head about how he was going to word his letter, he decided to take a page out of Stark’s book and start with a greeting.

_ <strike>Hello, Mr. Stark.</strike> _

_ <strike>Hi, Mr. Stark.</strike> _

Still too distant.

Then James remembered something he saw in a televised symposium at Caltech. Stark was one of the key speakers and the organizer kept referring to him as Dr. Stark to which he replied with ‘_Tony, please. Dr. Stark sounds like I’m about to give you guys some scary flu shots.’_

_Hello, Tony._

_How are you doing?_

The address for the Stark tower was easy enough to find online. He could just say thank you for helping him get rid of the triggers in his head and the video message too. Later, he was hit in the face by the realization that he couldn’t bring himself to send the notes to Stark. James was would inexplicably chicken out the moment he pulled the envelope out, which was utterly ridiculous. For fuck’s sake, he endured seven damn decades of every torture known to man and fought all kinds of motherfuckers for more, how the hell was sending mere thank you notes to some rich, confusing, generous bastard making him turn tail?

The frustration got to the point that he had to get a lidded box to store all the notes he never—would never get to—got to send.

* * *

James wanted to stab his own ears—until he was sure the serum would not be able to repair the damage—every time he hears Stark’s name from the others. They already got their goal of becoming _heroes _again, legally this time, and got back to their fancy Compound with a bonus of stipends from the government, he couldn’t understand what was the need to talk shit about the man.

Stark wasn’t with them, hell, the man was too busy running his company and being with his new team to even bother about the Avengers. They had probably invoked Stark’s name more times in one conversation than they ever did God’s in their entire lifetime.

It was enough that he got himself dipping into some of HYDRA’s training more often than not—shifting his point of view into a more calculated and analytical one to keep the distracting emotions at bay, otherwise the Avengers might end up losing more than half of its members. Thus, instead of bodily harm, unless he was truly tested and was caught in a bad mood, he crafted ways how to divert the Avengers’ attention from Stark.

He had been doing so, successfully if he may be so bold to add, for quite some time when they got another call to assemble.

They were on the way to Miami when he overheard that Steve and Natalia apparently had two Senators backing their agenda of being assigned to the same missions as the New Avengers and setting up a monthly inter-team meeting.

They faced giant, shell-less clam looking creatures that frankly made him a bit hungry. He forgot the last time he had truly indulged in freshly caught seafood—probably in the front lines during the war. In Wakanda, their meals focused more on vegetables, fruits and meat, fish was seldom served. In the Compound, takeaway was constant and majority of them were only capable of cooking meat dishes.

He was pulled from his gastronomic musings when he heard Stark rebuffing Steve’s offer of joining the Avengers for something after the mission.

“Didn’t I make myself clear, Rogers? Leave me alone. I have a mission to do.” The other brunet said irritably, moving around Steve to go into his assigned post. His eyes made contact with James’ for a second or two as he did so, then he continued on his way.

He was about to turn away himself when he saw Stark tapping the reactor on his chest. James’ breath got caught in his throat when he saw the armor _fluidly move _and cover Stark. He found himself avidly following how the material—whatever the fuck the armor was made out of—slid over Stark’s body with his eyes. It was quite possibly the most amazing thing he had ever seen, it was like straight out the dime novels and the armor itself was beautiful.

Sleek and elegant, somehow seemingly graceful for a suit of metal. Aesthetically speaking, it was far superior than the one Stark had in Germany and, he was certain, more powerful by nautical miles. However, if Stark putting on the armor made his breath get stuck in his throat, seeing it _in_ _action _took his damn breath away that he almost got swatted away by one of the creatures’ tentacles.

The armor moved just as fluidly as it did over Stark’s form as it flew around to distract the creatures while the others attack and shone like a beacon in striking streaks of crimson interspersed with gold. He found himself frowning behind his mask every time the creatures splattered slime over it, though the armor’s shine wasn’t diminished in any way.

In the end, both teams got Scott and his former(?) girlfriend to shrink the creatures and return them to the water. James sighed, when he saw that they resembled oysters without shell more in their diminutive form. He should’ve asked to take them back to the Compound instead. Those would’ve been fantastic on a charcoal grill, then a spritz of lemon, some salt and if he’s lucky, a bit of hot sauce, like the ones he saw on TV.

“Dammit!”

Stark, yet again, dragged him out of his thoughts as Stark complained about the state of his armor to Danvers and van Dyne. His enhanced vision could make out that same pout on Stark’s face as the video message, only more disgruntled.

“As you wish.” Van Dyne and Danvers smirked simultaneously. James felt like it was a joke of some kind, going by their expressions.

And he was right.

Stark blinked those long lashes a few times and then laughed—not the almost coquettish laugh he made in the video but a full-blown laughter, somehow making everything brighter when the midday sun was shining and beating down their backs the whole time.

He thought back to what he got in his little research about Stark—brilliant, hard-working, determined and outrageously generous. With the scene before him, James added another, he had an amazing laugh.

* * *

The next encounter he had with Stark was when some asshole with robots decided to attack New York. Steve had decided to forego Rhodes’ plan, which was admittedly better than what Steve had in mind, and he got to a nest that conveniently covered Stark’s six. When the final surge of the bots suddenly targeted Iron Man, he saw Stark get ready to fire with his repulsors. James quickly jumped in front of him to make him stop—there were two officers behind the mass of bots that were bringing an elderly lady and a child to safety. He immediately tore through the bots, just in case they noticed the escape.

What happened next was more or less confusing to him. Because after he destroyed the bots, Stark marched over to where he was and mercilessly tore him a new one. He was about to explain himself when he remembered what happened in Miami. He repeated the joke the women made to put a stop to the smaller man’s ranting, however, instead of laughing Stark reared back and his eyes were wide in bafflement, as though James had grown a third head.

The real kicker was when he found out that the ‘joke’ turned out to be a one-liner from some popular fairytale movie and that Stark was genuinely distressed by his actions and presence, as proven by his seething reaction in the hallway. James wanted to pull his own innards out of his nasal cavity when he recalled the tears Stark furiously blinked away. To rub more salt into the wound, he found out later that the video message he received was actually Shuri _just sharing _the news that Stark was willing to help some more if something went wrong with his treatment. Apparently, he had skipped the first message saying so and he went into believing Stark had actually forgiven him.

He was so fucking _stupid_.

The following events left him in a dour mood. Even more so when Steve’s obsession with Stark became more apparent and the others were either too blind or just much more stupid than him to not notice. He felt sick to his bones when he saw that damned painting Steve made. Pieces finally fell into place when he saw the names on the page. He couldn’t believe what Steve was planning. He wanted to have engineered babies to bind Stark to him. It was eerily in line with HYDRA’s brand of insanity that the disgust and rage he had mingled and led him to beating the idea out of his friend.

His friend.

Could he still call the man who wore Stevie’s face his friend?

All the things Steve spat in his fury slinked back into his mind. It had never crossed his mind that Steve would think of him that way. Then again, people did say things they don’t mean when angered. But how would that explain Steve’s descent into losing himself?

* * *

The familiar whine of repulsors snapped him back to the present and, like the often said cliché, Stark was there in his shiny suit of armor.

_“Barnes_? The hell happened to you?” Stark’s voice was distorted by the suit’s communication device.

He slowly stood up and tried not to gawk in awe as he got to see the armor move over Stark closely as it retreated back into the reactor, leaving Stark in a semi-casual attire of jeans, shirt, blazer and loafers.

“Got into a fight with Steve.” He answered, looking away.

Stark rolled his eyes and scoffed, “So that’s his thing now? _Domestic violence_? Did anyone ever tell you that BARF is the only thing I could help you out with?” he then gestured to his own face with his hand, actually referring to James’ bruised face, “If you wanted _that_ settled, get a lawyer.”

James’ eyes flew to Stark as he stuttered, “Domesti—wait, what—“

“No, don’t answer that. I don’t really give a damn about your issues with Rogers.” Stark interjected before barreling on, “What I want to know is how you got into contact with my AI.”

A woman’s disembodied voice answered, “Boss, I—“

“Mute.” Stark cut its answer sharply, then looked at James with an eyebrow raised.

He was stumped by the question, “What do you mean? I never got into contact with any AI.”

Stark’s glare sharpened as he stepped closer to James, much like in the hallway, “Bullshit. Don’t fucking lie to me. Why the hell would she activate a distress signal for me to find you then?”

“Stark, I really don’t have any idea what you’re saying.”

The genius only stared at him for a moment, “You actually think I wouldn’t be able to recognize your handwriting?”

The crease on his forehead deepened with Stark’s words, “My handwriting…what?”

The smile Stark gave him was cutting, “That’s very cute of you, Barnes. Remember the post-it on the Reese’s? It was a nice touch, by the way. Placing it on a pack of chocolates that bear my new nickname.”

“Look, doll, there must be a mis—“

“I already told you to stop fucking calling me that, _Westley._ A mistake? Damn right there is. Your handwriting had changed a little from the one I knew from the textbooks as a child but I recognize it from the notes you send to me through FRIDAY. Now, tell me how you got into contact with her. Was it Romanoff? Lang? Barton?”

James’ heart and stomach did a free-fall into the ground at that, “I never sent you any note, Stark. Apart from the one at the meeting, that’s it.”

At that, Stark’s smile turned so sweet and cloying that it made James’ teeth ache, "Good morning, Tony. How are you doing, Tony? I saw that commercial for the new Starkphone today, it was funny. Tony, you’re a scientist and you have a flying suit of armor, but why don’t we see a flying car yet?”

He felt his chest tighten and the blood leave his face.

Oh, God.

Stark knew about the notes.

Worse, he had somehow read them.

“Shall I continue, Barnes?” The smaller man prompted, looking at him from beneath his thick lashes in a sick parody of a flirtation.

“How did you find out about that?” he asked through gritted teeth. He had been so careful.

The smile and the coy look in Stark’s face left immediately as he stepped away from James, “How the hell would I _not_ find out if you’re sending them to my AI?”

“I never got into contact with your AI, Stark.” he repeated, his own temper was starting to get the best of him.

“I’ll repeat the question from before—did Rogers put you up to this? I’m pretty sure he did, this whole thing stinks of him.”

_Jesus. Fucking. Christ._

He was now beginning to realize why Steve lost it when Stark got stubborn. The bastard was a whole lot worse than Steve and a thousand mules combined.

“He didn’t. And I really don’t see your angle here, Stark. Why the hell do you keep saying shit like Steve putting me up to this? I can think for myself.” He shot back.

“Well, forgive me. It’s quite hard to separate you from him and his sycophants. We both know Rogers’ words are law with you lot. You all obey whatever he said without question.”

James couldn’t tell if Stark just made that comment on the fly or it was a dig at his bout with stupidity regarding Stark and forgiveness, as well as his time with HYDRA. Whatever it was, it served its purpose in pissing him the fuck off.

“And here I thought your fancy trigger removing gadget made sure I would be doing none of that now.” He crooned, smile becoming much sharper than the knives he had on his person.

Be that as it may, what little satisfaction he got from making Stark falter was erased by guilt when Stark’s tanned skin became pale and he flinched as though hit.

“I’m sorry—“

“It doesn’t matter.” James cut him off this time, “I don’t and never had any contact with your AI. And Steve sure as fuck did not put me up to anything.”

“Fine!” Stark snapped, “In that case, stop whatever the hell you’re doing because I don’t want more drama with you and Rogers. Can’t you both just leave me alone?”

“Stark, in case you haven’t noticed, ever since you ripped my head off in the hallway you’ve never see me, head or tail. I left you alone. You’re the one who came in here like the cavalry complete with armor.”

The engineer ran both of his hands down his face, “You’re going in circles! I fucking told you that my AI whom you allegedly never contacted sent me a—“

“A little pot kettle there, doll.” He shot back and added before Stark could speak, “If you really wanted to get away from the drama then be careful around Steve.”

Stark’s attention zeroed in on him more firmly when the words registered, “_Wow_. Rogers’ precious Bucky trash-talking him behind his back? This, I gotta hear.”

He ignored the blatant sarcasm in Stark’s tone and calmly replied, “There’s something wrong with Steve. He’s not the same anymore.”

The billionaire’s head tilted a little to the side with a little grin of disbelief pulling at the corners of his lips, “That’s it? That’s your big reveal?”

“Stark, be serious. I’m telling you that Steve’s gone crazy—“

“No shit, Sherlock.” Stark countered, shaking his head, “Why the hell do you think I’m being as far away from him as possible?”

“You knew?” Hope bloomed in James’ chest. Stark may be able to get away from Steve’s sick plan unharmed, after all.

“Of course, I knew! If the Civil War and Siberia and all the ‘notice me, senpai’ shit he is doing nowadays taught me anything, it’s that Steve Rogers has a lot of lose screws.” Stark riposted as he moved toward the exit, “And I don’t need you to know all of that. This was a waste of time. Now, if we’re done here, I’m leaving.”

“Wait, Stark.” he placed a hand around one of Stark’s wrists to stop him. They obviously weren’t on the same page based on the man’s reply. He had to know, James wouldn’t be able to live with himself if something happened to him, “You don’t understand, _you’re in danger_.”

The moment he got a firm hold of Stark’s wrist though, he heard the mechanical whine of the gauntlet, like the one Stark used in Berlin, from the man’s other hand.

“Unhand me, Barnes.” Stark snarled, “You say I’m in danger from Rogers? I fucking know that already. I’m not stupid and besides, you were there when he left me to die in Siberia. You saw how much danger I could be in when it came to Rogers. I’ll tell you again, I’m leaving. And I won’t hesitate to use force if necessary.”

He immediately released his hold on the man, raising his hands palm up, in show of goodwill, “Please, listen to me—“

Incessant blasting of rock music resonated within the four walls of the room they were in. Stark pulled out his phone and answered, “Stark.”

James held on to the small chance that Stark maybe inclined to listen to him more after the call and even a minute would be enough. However, that was immediately shot to hell when alarm broke out into Stark’s face.

“I’m on my way.” Stark ended the call and quickly made his way out of the room to the stairs.

James followed and called after him, “Stark! Hold on!”

“I don’t have time to listen to you whining about Rogers, Barnes!” Stark yelled back, he seemed to be thinking about activating the armor again but have decided against it when he noticed James was getting closer to him.

They made it out of the building into the streets when a cab stopped in front of Stark and the man immediately hopped into it. James could’ve chased the cab but that would draw too much attention, also Stark would make good on his threat if tempted. It would get the man in trouble with the Council if he attacked someone from another team and in a civilian area. That would only make the man hate him more.

He guessed the universe really had it out for him because not only did he fuck up with his notes, he also royally fucked up with informing Stark about Steve’s plan. Not to mention, the fact that Stark managed to get into a cab _seconds_ after he went out to the street, in fucking _New_ _York_? That was a damn miracle in and of itself.

He really needed to remember which fucker out there was the one he had somehow offended.

James hadn’t done something so juvenile in decades but he figured he no one could blame him for it. He punched a hole through one of the building’s walls in anger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lemme know what you think! *kisses* See you on the next part!


	6. Westley (Continuation)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The laugh that escaped James was humorless, “And your brilliant idea is to throw Stark at him like a piece of meat. I can say a lot of things about you, Tasha but I never would have guessed stupid would be one of them. You would hand Stark over to Steve, kicking and screaming just to save your own ass?” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **For my lovely readers who will find their name and picture at the end of this chapter. MY APOLOGIES FOR NOT ASKING PERMISSION FIRST, I don't mean to offend anyone. I just wanted it to be surprise.**   
****   
**MORE MISHA NON-SENSE  
**RUSSIAN DIMINUTIVES  
****

It was dark when James got back to the Compound. He was a bit anxious about seeing Steve again, but he marched on. Better to get it done and over with. He was intercepted by Natalia in the lobby, who seemed to have been waiting for him for hours.

“Soldat.”

“If you’re here to defend Steve then I don’t want to hear it, Natalia.” He drawled.

Natalia’s eyes kept contact with his before she warily looked around, “Not here.”

* * *

She briskly walked out of the building to the lake and James followed her, noting the rather somber cast to her demeanor. When they were far enough from the Compound’s main building, they sat on the bench side by side.

“What is it?” James started and straight to the point.

“Steve told us that you two had an argument.”

“And?”

“He didn’t tell us anything else. Sam and Scott were in disbelief, thinking maybe you got triggered into reverting into the Soldier’s mindset again. Same thing for Wanda and Clint but they’re livid with what you did to Steve. He only managed to talk them down by playing up the trigger scenario—“

“Now, they’re blaming Stark for his faulty treatment. Is that it?” he supplied.

“Yes. Steve kept the story that way and he told me that he wanted to apologize to you as soon as you came back.”

James pinched the bridge of his nose and huffed at Steve’s audacity, “Сукин сын.” Of course, Steve would think of something like that. He’d say B.A.R.F. was not enough to completely erase James’ triggers, instead of admitting the fact the he messed up.

“We need to protect Tony.”

His eyes flew open at Natalia’s soft murmur. He would’ve said his version of the serum was failing him already if not for the subtle but fierce protectiveness that burned in her eyes.

“What brought this on, _Natasha_? I thought you were Steve’s little ballerina, dancing to his tune?” he asked, uncaring if every word sliced at her.

She flinched minutely and looked downed on her interlaced fingers, “I’m a spy, _Soldat_. I’m well-versed in being a double agent.”

“And more marks for you then, Natalia. You even had me fooled.” He replied dryly. “Ivan would be proud.”

The mention of the man who brought her to the Red Room made her look at him sharply, eyes narrowing into slits, “I’m not following Steve because I believe in what he wants to achieve. I’m following him because I know being in Tony’s orbit would keep him from causing destruction.”

He was half-tempted to call bullshit but he only tipped his head as an indication for her to continue. She sighed and looked back to the lake, picking on the hem of one of her jacket’s sleeves with her nails. It was something he hadn’t seen her do for a long time. A sign of anxiety that he, under the orders from the Red Room, had to punch and kick out of her.

* * *

“When SHIELD first got Steve out of the ice, he was afraid and confused about everything. Then, when he found out about Tony, his attention was immediately hooked. Tony was somehow connected to his past through Howard Stark, unlike the rest of us in the team. Steve figured that if he had Tony by his side he’ll get the balance of regaining what he lost and having something new at the same time. But, he was in for a nasty surprise. Tony isn’t _Tony Stark_ because he was following people around.”

James let out a muted snort. Ain’t that the truth. He just got back from one of the few encounters he had with the man that clearly showed how Tony Stark was nobody’s yesman.

Natalia had a little grin in agreement to his thoughts that quickly died on her lips when she continued her tale, “When it became obvious to Steve how different Tony was from his father, Steve got upset and he hated Tony for it. He started being more critical of Tony than the rest of us, no matter if we also screwed up. Tony, at the time, was still too hungry for approval though, Fury believed it was Howard’s influence. Tony may have argued with Steve, but he still did whatever he could to live up to Steve’s standards. I couldn’t blame him though, what better jump up in your superhero resumé can you have than Captain America’s approval? And with the assessment I did…” she sardonically shook her head.

“The one Fury asked you to do for the Avengers Initiative?”

“Yes.” She turned to face him with a small, but more genuine grin, “You know, I wouldn’t have written the assessment like that if not for pushing Tony to join the Avengers Initiative. He wanted to prove himself to the world but he was afraid that SHIELD would steal his tech.”

He raised an eyebrow at the first part of the statement. On the other hand, wouldn’t blame Stark though. Even if it was unknown at the time, the part of HYDRA that hid within SHIELD was salivating over the thought of the Iron Man armor in their hands.

“What I wrote there was mostly true though, he was self-destructive and don’t play well with others, probably because he was dying at the time and he grew up having and getting things quickly for himself.” The grin grew a bit wider and fonder the more she talked,

“But, at the very end, would I have recommended Tony Stark as part of the Initiative? _I would_. Tony Stark was the one who brought Iron Man to the table after all. Anyone else could wear the suit, but no one would be able to match what Iron Man truly stood for better than Tony Stark himself. The moment he got out of that plane from Afghanistan to that press con telling people how he wanted to be part of the solution and not become part of a system comfortable with not having accountability, I already knew that I’m looking at something we’re only going to see once in our lifetime. I guess, Steve, after spending more time with Tony, caught on to that too. That’s actually why I was so gung ho with setting Steve up with someone back in DC.”

At the mention of Steve, James let the question hanging on the tip of his tongue loose, “If you really do think Stark was something else, why are you following Steve then?”

“Because I know that I need to do something. Out of everyone in the team, I was the only one who noticed how Steve was acting. Not even Clint.”

James clucked his tongue, “I’m really worried that you’ve been giving that ass too much credit, Natalia. He was the one who brought that spiteful little witch into the fold.”

“Perhaps, but he saved my life. I could spare a little credit for that.”

He nodded and fired another concern of his, “Why do everything to get Stark back into the team if you really wanted to protect him? He’s much better off now with the New Avengers.”

“You know why. You were also there in the midst of the _Civil War.”_

* * *

He was starting to see her motivation. _Being in Tony’s orbit would keep him from causing destruction. Stark didn’t listen to Steve and Steve couldn’t accept it._

“You were trying to appease Steve’s need to have Stark by placing Steve near him.”

“I am. The Captain America clout can only do so much if not channeled properly, that’s why I had to do something to keep Steve from resorting to the extremes.”

The laugh that escaped James was humorless, “And your _brilliant_ idea is to throw Stark at him like a piece of meat. I can say a lot of things about you, _Tasha_ but I never would have guessed _stupid_ would be one of them. You would hand Stark over to Steve, kicking and screaming just to save your own ass?”

Her emerald green eyes were burning with venom as she grounded, “Easy for you to say. After the Accords mess, where were you? You chose to undergo cryostasis and even after getting help, you left the rest of us to deal with Steve by staying in the countryside. He was already unstable after the fight with Tony and his other rudder has left him too. You weren’t the one who had to stop him from going into rampage when the news about Tony and Pepper’s engagement broke out. You saw for yourself how willing he was to destroy you over some silly rumour about you and Tony. Do you have any idea how an actual engagement went over with him? What do you think would have happened if Steve _did _get to sneak out of Wakanda and went on to decapitate Pepper Potts?”

Natalia didn’t let him actually speak though, “She was the future wife of Iron Man, and also the CEO of Stark Industries—the company that everyone in America and majority of the world knew and loved. People will be out for blood for her, not to mention, Steve would have endangered Wakanda too. The Accords had already proven it for us, Steve could single-handedly start a war if he didn’t get his way and his need to be always right satisfied.”

He wouldn’t even dare imagine all the destruction Steve would have caused if Natalia was not able to reason with him back then. The little spider had a point but still. Destruction would happen if Steve got his way now.

“You got him to stop before. As his friend, you should have laid the truth out for him before any of this gets worse.”

“That’s what I’m counting on you for. You did that already a few hours ago. Quite spectacularly, I might add.” She smiled, her righteous fury from seconds ago vanishing into thin air, “I’m not blind, Soldat. For some reason, you’re doing everything you could to protect Tony too.”

He exhaled harshly, “Because what I’m seeing and what you’re all doing isn’t right. Боже мой, Natalia. Stark isn’t some punching bag nor is he a sacrificial lamb.”

“I know that. However, you don’t know Tony Stark the way we do. He’d be more than willing to lay his own life down on the wire if it meant saving another person.”

James bit back all the Russian expletives that wanted to come out of his throat and sneered, “And that makes all of this _okay_?! For fuck’s sake, this is bullshit Natalia.”

“I’m not saying I’m going to force Tony into marrying Steve.” She volleyed mockingly, “My aim is to put them on the same team, nothing else. If Steve wants to pursue something else, he’s on his own. I know Tony or the New Avengers will kick his ass to hell and back to knock some sense into him. You could help Tony with that too.” She crossed her arms over her chest, squinting her eyes at him, “I must say, I’m surprised with you, Soldat. You seem to be under the idea that I’m doing this because I want them to be in a relationship. Did the patented Stark charm work its magic on you already?”

There was a little part of him that wanted to run away as his mind processed the words, but he only scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not doing it because I want to fuck Stark into the floor. There’s actually this thing called being a decent human being, Natalia. You should try it.”

A single perfectly groomed red eyebrow shot upward by the end of his words, “Oh, who said anything about fucking Stark?” she smirked, ignoring the jab.

James internally fumed, he wanted to throw her into the lake just to get that infuriating little smirk she had, “A little ironic Natalia, you’re the one who’s too eager to get back to Stark’s good graces that you even resorted to using Steve.”

The teasing smirk wiped itself off her face and came back the somber cast to her from earlier, “You’re right. I do have a personal agenda behind all this. But, it’s not what you think. I want my family back. The real one I had with the Avengers. Not this _sham_ that we’re living in.”

James only looked at her and she took a deep breath, slowly exhaling to calm herself, “Maybe I followed Steve too, because I agreed that Tony _is_ family. The Avengers were more of a strike team in the beginning to be honest. We only needed to be around each other to get the job done if some mighty asshole came around. But, Tony would have none of that. He took us in and Tony made us a family. He gave us a home. He gave _me_ a home despite all the blood I have on my ledger.”

“And even if you try so hard to build the bridge back up after you threw all of that away to keep Steve from destroying everything, you still couldn’t get back. You know that the moment you leave, Steve would be pushed to move because he came to rely on you too.”

She gave him a small smile that reminded him of the child she used to be. The same smile she’d given him a lifetime ago when she was still ‘little Natalia’. The one she wore after she was forced to eliminate a friend she made in the Red Room in order to please Madame B. “Tony gave me a family in place of the one I will never have. I want to go back.”

James let out a sigh to dislodge that pain in his chest, “I know you do. But doing all of this won’t bring you closer to home. We could inform the Council about everything. There are a lot of ways to get out of this. We could even get Steve help. You’ll be able to go back home.” He gently patted the back of her head.

She smiled and blinked a few times to dry her eyes then replied caustically, “The word of the known Russian double-agent who turned her back on Tony Stark, against the word of _Captain America?” _

“The world wouldn’t be so blind to Steve now, he made it clear that he was fine with going against the world to get what he wants.”

“Maybe. But we both know that it’s not that simple. How many people have rallied behind us to get back to States? Most of them did because of Steve. We also got two Senators who help us at every turn to get closer to Tony just because they idolized Captain America. I don’t think solving this would be as simple as that.”

“If we tell Stark—“

“Do you actually think he’ll believe us?”

* * *

James thought back to that disastrous ‘chance’ meeting he and Stark had in the city earlier and bit the inside of his cheek. He would have had an easier time making a goddamn _gerbil_ believe him.

Natalia took his silence as an answer, “I think it’s because of how _these_ _Americans_ were raised on the stories of Captain America being the representation of what is right and good in the world.” She replied, her Russian accent smoothly replacing the flawless American she was using all the time.

He chuckled in surprise at her sudden poking fun at the Russian-American ‘feud’ and her obvious exclusion of him from the targets of her mock disdain, “Now, now, _Natashen’ka._ _These Americans_ are the ones who took you in after you left the Motherland. And one would think you’d appreciate them more for that, add the fact that I, myself, am American.” He chided gently in his own Russian accent.

She scoffed daintily, “_Soldat, _the Motherland had you in her bosom for decades and even before then, from those documentaries we’ve seen in the Smithsonian, you barely fit in as an American. You seem a little _European_ for the average American because of your Romanian roots. Besides, as far as the international community is concerned you’re a _Russian_ assassin.”

James shrugged, he did recall hearing a few of his Handlers expressing surprise toward his apparently, Moldovan-accented Russian. They had expected him to speak with a more Western accent, “I am a trained _international _assassin, _Natashka.”_

She rolled her eyes in disgust, “Stop that. You sound like Tony sarcastically calling himself a _community dick_ when some of his crazier flings crawled out of the woodwork after he became an Avenger.”

He grimaced in distaste at that, “The hell?”

The light, bubbly atmosphere that they have randomly built disintegrated when Natalia continued, “Yes. You should have seen the look on Steve when he said that. We were watching like six bimbos sharing their own version of A Night with Tony Stark in one of Clint’s trashy gossip shows during one of the lulls after New York.”

Something pinged in his mind with the timeframe she described, “If Steve was already getting jealous of Stark’s relationships then, he should’ve been more hateful towards Virginia Potts, which doesn’t add up because from what I heard from Barton, Steve always had good words for her.”

Natalia snorted, “Of course, he _hates_ Pepper. He was just hiding it and always used the convenient excuse of ‘I’m just remembering Peggy’ every time he made a face whenever he saw Stark and Pepper being affectionate with each other. I think Pepper had a hunch that Steve hates her, but just didn’t know why. She didn’t like him much either, and by extension the rest of the team with the exception of Bruce and Thor. I got a bit of leniency though, I think it was because Natalie Rushman was a great secretary. I still have the performance rating as proof.”

James ran his natural hand through his hair, “He wouldn’t use Peggy like that.”

“But he did, and didn’t feel remotely guilty about it.”

“Don’t be absurd, Natalia. He _did_ love Peggy.” James couldn’t help the long-ingrained instinct of defending Steve’s stupid ass.

“I’m not saying he didn’t, Soldat. He knew Carter was only hanging on by a thread and Tony is still here. He didn’t have to think too hard about his choice. And I told you, to Steve, Tony is the embodiment of everything he wanted to go back and look forward to.”

Letting her win that one, then he jumped into their—because it was clear that he’ll have Natalia’s support on this—new plan.

“Change of plans, _Natashech’ka_.” He gave her an approving nod at how quickly she went to attention, “You’re not going to help Steve anymore. Not in the surface, at least.”

“What do you need me to do?” Natalia asked, her eyes shining with the small glimmer of life returning to them.

“What you do well the most.” He replied, “Gathering information and undercover. Since Stark and the Council are not going to believe us with just our words, we’re going to need tangible evidence before going to them. Every time Steve makes a plan, you’ll be there—get everything we could use. Data, videos, notes, pictures make a copy of everything. After we’ve gathered sufficient evidence, we’ll move.”

“So you’re suggesting we’ll doublecross, Steve.”

“Yes.”

A smile more beautiful and lethal than the knives he loved graced her pouty lips, “I’m glad to be working with you, Soldat.”

* * *

The days went on like usual and James had to keep bile from rising in his throat at Steve’s apologies and the way he had brushed off their fight. Since he had Natalia acting like nothing was amiss, he also had to do his part. He told Steve what the blond wanted to hear and felt like he was reading from a script. There was a large part of him that was mourning his friend, that little guy from Brooklyn he knew and loved. Still, he had to do what was necessary even if his loyalties were screaming at him for his treachery. Moving Steve’s attention away from Stark—at the moment—was easy enough because he only needed to remind Steve of how they nearly killed each other and how it started that Steve would recoil from the mere thought and turn his focus on something else.

He breathed a sigh of relief when Steve made no attempt to corner Stark at the fundraising event thrown together by a local NGO to help the homeless. The blond got himself surrounded by fans, children and adults alike, James considered that the main reason that he didn’t follow Stark around like a neglected puppy.

Speaking of Stark, he surreptitiously scanned the crowd and looked for the man, he found him sitting on the ground away from majority of the activities surrounded mostly by children. Stark, clad in just another band shirt and jeans, had a screwdriver in one hand as he turned a battered music box this way and that. James took note of the children and noticed that all of them had toys in their hand. Ah, Stark was fixing the toys for them, never mind the fact that he brought new ones for them.

“Ta-da! Good as new!” Stark sang as he handed the music box to a black little girl, “Try it.” The girl nodded, turning the key to the box and it played ‘Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star’. The girl’s eyes widened, she immediately ran into Stark’s arms and screamed with joy as she was thanking him. James felt the corner of his lips pull at the scene, even more so as Stark laughed and gave the girl a high five.

As the girl gave way to the next kid in line, an Asian boy with a robot, Stark made eye contact with James. There was still that bright smile on Stark’s lips that it made James grin wider. Stark’s lips curled up a little further before he realized it was James he was smiling at. The smile quickly went down as Stark looked away and gave his attention to the boy before him.

James felt the grin on his own lips dim as well before he took a gulp of juice from the red cup in his hand. He turned away from Stark only to find Romanoff behind a table, arranging gifts, looking at him with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. He glared at her before turning to a different direction, only to find himself blinking at Rhodes, who stood at the far end of the room, glowering darkly at him and absolutely uncaring if there was anyone who would see.

Well, shit.

* * *

ON TWITTER LATER THAT DAY....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tweets are back and yes, they got a hell of an upgrade. Again, to my readers who find their names here, I don't mean to offend you. I only wish to express my gratitude for your continued support of this fic. THANK YOU.
> 
> p.s. made a mistake with the first tweet---It's supposed dated to be Dec. 6. I just realized.


	7. Just because you're beautiful and perfect, it's made you conceited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tiny smile almost tugged at a corner of her lips. Even under a literal mask, Tony Stark could still see through her.
> 
> That in turn made her remember why she had no love for Tony in the beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *DROPS TO MY KNEES*
> 
> Please for give me for not updating this for so long! T_T  
Before the community quarantine in our area, I got busy with my school activities and I'm so over the moon with being an Aunt that updating my fics slip out of my mind. I'M SORRY!
> 
> Please enjoy this ridiculously long chapter as my apology. 
> 
> Again, no beta thus the mistakes are my own. **NOT TEAM CAP FRIENDLY** heed the warnings. Also, let's all stay safe everyone.

“Hey, where’re you going?” Steve asked as he made his way closer to her in the Compound lobby. He must have been in the gym earlier sparring with the others, she noted.

“I am going to get in touch with a contact of mine.” Natasha held up the manila folder in her hand, “I want to speed up the process…with my parents’ resting place.”

Steve looked at her with heartbreak in his eyes, “Nat, I’m s—“

“It’s okay, Steve. I mean, the least I can do is make sure they have a more familiar place to rest in. I’ve put it off for so long.”

Steve moved to her and gathered her into a hug, “Do you want me to go with you?” he whispered into her hair.

“I’ll be fine, Steve. I’m a big girl, I have my big girl pants on.” She teased as she pulled back. Steve chuckled and tugged on her jacket’s collar.

“Of course, what was I thinking? You’re the Black Widow. If there’s anyone who’s going to be quick when it came to saving themselves, it’s _you_.”

She breathed a laugh at the mock jab and made her way to the exit, “Whatever, Rogers. I’ll see you later.”

“Good luck and don’t forget the pizza on your way back!”

Natasha only smirked and waved over shoulder in response.

* * *

Natasha quietly sneaked into an event by the September Foundation held in a Science High School in Queens. She almost felt a shudder run through her. Her parents must be rolling in their new graves with the knowledge that she had used them as cover up. Then again, she didn’t exactly lie—she did have her parents’ remains transferred in a cemetery in their village in Stalingrad. Though she made the arrangements before they returned to the States. She requested for T’challa’s assistance to get in touch with a contact of hers in Kiev, since the king knew what it was like to lose a parent, he granted her request without the others knowing.

When Steve asked her earlier where she was going, she almost considered pulling a Widow Bite to get him to back off. The man seemed to be under the impression that she was still keeping tabs on Tony and he needed a report. He was still trying to _fix_ things with Soldat that’s why he was giving Tony a wide berth for almost a month now.

No calls, no letters, no deliveries, not even cornering the genius during events. He was obviously getting antsy without his Tony fix.

He was not wrong per se. She was still keeping tabs on Tony, on the account that Steve was thinking of pulling something and she—also Soldat—had to stop him.

Although she rarely used it, Natasha had always been fond of the photostatic veil. Gone were the days that she had to put on a ton of prosthesis and cart around several wigs for an undercover. There had been a few missions when she was younger wherein the hair dye either wouldn’t stick to her hair or worse, produce such a ghastly shade that she wished Clint would end up choking to death for laughing at her too much.

As much as she loved her red hair, dyeing it was, admittedly, a nightmare. The veil was convenient and fun to use. The wigs were still there but at least, she had less things to worry about. The only real setback had been the fact that it needed DNA samples from the person to imitate in order for the veil to give the user an accurate depiction.

However, that too, had changed when Tony got a hold of the ones she and Clint were using when they were still living at the Tower, a few months before Ultron.

_“You know, Ob—Stane really wanted to get his hands on this.” _

_“Hmm?” Natasha hummed, seeing Tony come up to the common room from his lab. She was reading while nibbling on some of the cookies the man had imported from the Motherland for her._

_“This.” Tony repeated showing the schematics of a photostatic veil to her from his Starkpad. _

_“The nano veil?” A part of her was thrown off a little by the fact that Tony was willing to discuss something like this with her. Or discuss with her at all. Something personal at that. Tony avoided talking about Stane as much as possible, thus it was a surprise that he would talk about this. She knew that the lithium dioxide and the assessment were still sore spots for Tony hence he was a bit distant with her unlike with the others sometimes. She mulled it over for a while then came up with the answer._

_Bruce was out for a conference in Boston and would not be back for two more days. _

_Tony was feeling a little lonely without his ‘Science Bro’. _

_Normally, this kind of discussion was reserved only with Bruce or with Rhodes, if the man visited. Getting all excited about this gadget and that, oblivious that they’re leaving everyone wondering if they were speaking in English at all. She would have placed her bet on Steve as the first person he would run to, seeing as even the blind could see how Tony was still building up the gap between seeking Steve’s approval and wanting to be his friend._

_Boy, was she wrong about that. _

_Putting it in a different light, she should have seen this coming. She was the best choice outside of Bruce and Rhodes. Steve would be delighted to indulge Tony but he really wouldn’t care nor understand what the man was babbling about—having fun with Tony would be the only take away for the supersoldier. _

Like usual_. _

_Natasha blinked the worrying thought away. As long as the soldier was not planning something nefarious, there was no need to fret._

_Clint, on the other hand, wouldn’t mind talking to Tony and may comprehend some of what was said albeit at the end of the day, it would be just another conversation for the archer. And Thor, Tony adored the God of Thunder but he’d rather not get to arguing with the god about Science and magic. _

_Thus, the only choice left was her. _

_Natasha would not pretend that Tony couldn’t tell that there were times she was making conversation mostly to gather information. When Tony finally found out about her being a SHIELD agent, he became conscious of picking up the motives behind her actions._

_If she were being honest, she’d say it was irksome to say the least. _

_Be that as it may, it didn’t mean that all of their times around each other was all smokes and mirrors. She did like Tony when it came down to it, though the threads of the Red Room still wound around her rebelled at the fact that this man who had not been broken in the same way she was, clearly was able to read her. It brings back memories of Madame B’s lilting reprimand. _

‘Sloppy. Trying to fail. Do it again.’

_Even with the combined efforts of General Dreykov and Madame B to turn her into a weapon—she was still made of flesh and blood. With a little sigh, she locked all those thoughts away and focused on Tony moving closer to where she was. She was about to sit up when Tony lifted her feet up before sitting down on the sofa himself, letting her legs on his lap and placing his tablet on the coffee table._

_“He wanted guy—“ Tony made a vague, flailing gesture with his hand then ran it through his messy hair, “Uh, the one who made it.”_

_“Dr. Selwyn.”_

_“Yeah, that one. We were there when Selwyn had the presentation done in front of the brass. It was a cool project. Stane wanted the guy to be part of SI’s R&D because we were also looking into creating better toys for covert missions since our last one…the Sonic Taser, didn’t meet government standards.” His eyes were a thousand miles away and his voice took on a melancholic note at the last part._

_Natasha schooled her face to keep it neutral. She knew about the Sonic Taser. She had read the reports from Coulson. Obadiah was fond of it, and even found glee in using it against Tony, the creator himself, before yanking the Arc reactor out of the genius’ chest and leaving Tony to die. _

_She couldn’t remember her parents, even Ivan was not as well-defined in her memories as he used to be anymore. That said, regardless of the plethora of learned responses and platitudes she had accumulated over the years, Natasha couldn’t come up with an appropriate reply. _

‘You never fail, Natalia. Remember that.’

_Well, Madame, here was another failure for the deadly Black Widow, courtesy of the _great_ Tony Stark._

_She settled more into the couch, prompting Tony to come out of his reverie, “Thing is, Selwyn turned it down. Said he had an ironclad contract at the moment—I’ll find out later that it was with SHIELD. Goddamn Fury.” He grumbled, “Anyway, that’s why even if he was totally willing to collab with me to improve the thing, negotiations didn’t take off.” He leaned back on the sofa, “Didn’t even manage to get on the runway.” He added with a shrug._

_“So, is this why you’re so excited Tony? You already have two here close to you and you’re now getting your heart’s desire to play with the veil?” Natasha smirked._

_“Why, Ms. Rushman…I would nevah!” Tony leaned away with fake outrage, “I will have you know that my Momma taught me manners! You really think little ol’ _pretty_ me would just touch other people’s things without ‘em knowing?! Disgraceful!” He continued with a highly exaggerated Southern accent and comically flipping his hair back._

_“Why, _Ms. Deveraux_.” She drawled and looked at him pointedly. The reference was obviously appreciated due to the bright grin she got back, “I never accused you of such a thing. Although, I’m guessing you already reached out to Selwyn for this? Intellectual property rights and all?”_

_“Dearest Widow, everybody knows you don’t look like Yoda but no one can deny you are wise.” He replied, still using that awful imitation of a Southern belle and laughed when she rolled her eyes._

_She reached for the plate of teacakes on the table and pushed it near him, “Teacakes, _Antosha_?” _

_He looked at the offered treats on the table to her and smiled, “Would love to.”_

_They spent the entire afternoon discussing how to improve the veil and later watching one season of The Golden Girls that Tony asked JARVIS to download._

* * *

Natasha couldn’t help but reminisce as she walked down the hallway of the school. Tony had FRIDAY send her a text containing the location of where they would meet.

During his speech earlier in the auditorium, Tony had spotted her in the crowd and used one of the secret signals she taught him before to tell her that they’re to have words with each other. A tiny smile almost tugged at a corner of her lips. Even under a literal mask, Tony Stark could still see through her.

That in turn made her remember why she had no love for Tony in the beginning.

Irritating.

That was the first word she had attached Tony Stark to when she found out about him. It was easy to suss out the man based on how he spent his time outside of his company—booze, sex and scandals. Those were pretty much what made up this man-child. He was also arrogant, self-absorbed and had no sense of self-preservation. Always thinking he was infallible because he was born practically shrouded in money.

In spite of her appreciation for movies, she was never one to truly like celebrities outside the screen, and the man was celebrated as more of one than a genius engineer. He was the perfect example of the stereotype spoiled celebrity child.

She did think it also made her sound like a biased columnist writing down everything that sold like hot pancakes, however, people who have interacted with the man have similar opinions.

Tony Stark was all about being the center of attention.

* * *

She knew Fury was going to assign her to assess Stark for the Avengers Initiative, it was what she did best—undercover and taking note of what made people tic. Of course, aside from lying, stealing and taking a life. Madame B had made sure that she would be the best out of everyone else, often reminded her of that too. Little Natalia was the epitome of what the Black Widow Program was all about. She would lure her prey, let them unwittingly entangle themselves in her web before she strikes and tears them apart.

_‘You’re breaking them.’_

_‘Only the breakable ones, but not you. You’re made of marble. You _won’t_ break.’ _

_‘And if I fail?’_

_‘You never fail’._

In hindsight, it was perhaps what made her too confident in her abilities. No matter how much people try to hide it, there will always be a sense of narcissism that will latch on to one’s psyche when they’re too used to being the best.

She never failed, she couldn’t possibly fail at anything that was asked of her.

The most ironic thing about it all was that the Madame was wrong.

Despite the fact that she tried to fail several times in order not to undergo the ceremony, Madame had seen through what she was doing.

She _could_ fail.

She was still _human_, she was bound to make some mistakes.

If she had failed in the program _properly_, she would not be the monster she was forced to become.

If she never failed, she would have been able to see through the masks of one Tony Stark.

And like any other human, she was also bound to feel things—like resentment.

She resented Tony Stark.

* * *

Of course, the man had picked the laboratory.

Laboratories were synonymous to safe havens for both Tony and Bruce unless the labs were owned by insane organizations, like HYDRA.

She found him sitting at the teacher’s table, playing with the Newton’s cradle.

Closing the door, she made a cursory sweep of the room with her eyes and found some precautions that the man had put into place. Tony moved the teacher’s table closer to the other door and arranged the chairs in, what at first glance would be, random disarray to stall her momentum if she were to decide to come any closer to the man. The blinds on the windows were drawn too, leaving an impression of the lab being unoccupied if one were to pass by outside. She had also noticed the watch containing the gauntlet on his wrist.

Chances of people finding them were low because the students and the faculty were still busy with the event. Not only that, the laboratories were at the other side of the school premises. This was a private, but evidently controlled environment.

Tony was the scientist and she the specimen under observation.

Choosing one table directly in front of Tony but not enough to crowd, she waited for a second to let the genius continue with the game of pretending he didn’t notice her arrival.

“Tony.” She nodded as she sat at the table, putting the manila folder on top of it. She placed her arms over the folder and laced her fingers together. Might as well start it off like it was a boardroom meeting.

The brunet pinned her with a look, “Agent Romanoff.” He pushed the cradle away and leaned back on his seat, looking casual but no doubt didn’t have time for anything other than business. “I’m surprised you didn’t go for the whole shebang with the veil, just a change in coloring.”

“I’m not here to be fully undetected, Tony. I need to make sure I blend with the crowd, but not enough to go unnoticed by you.” She replied with the same airy ease in her tone as Tony did. “I’m impressed with how quick you noticed me though, didn’t even take you a full ten minutes.”

“_Impressed_? _You_? Huh. The air in Wakanda must’ve done a number on you then. I modified the nano veils for you and Barton. Did you forget that already? I’ll be damned if I don’t recognize something I worked on.” Tony sniffed, giving her an appraising look, “However, we both know you’re not here for a small talk. So what do you want?”

Natasha couldn’t help but laugh a little, the whole thing was almost like their verbal sparring from before, “I do remember, Tony. We watched The Golden Girls after discussing it.”

“That’s not what I asked, Agent. Why are you here?”

“I need to talk to you.”

Tony clucked his tongue and sighed harshly, “Tell me, is my not answering any calls or summons from you and Rogers not a glaring proof of me not wanting to have anything to do with your gang anymore? C’mon, it’s been more than a year. Give it a damn rest. Rogers, I’m aware of, but you? I’m shocked that you could be real slow on the uptake too.”

“Tony, I’m not here to trade insults with you. We could do that later after we’re done with more important matters if that’s what you want.”

“Helping out the brilliant youngsters in this school _is_ an important matter, Romanoff. Maybe not to you, but it is to me. I’m not going to let you, Rogers, or the rest of your cult, ruin this for them.” He volleyed dryly.

“I’m not saying it isn’t, Tony. I know how much you like helping kid geniuses out.” She returned, “What I’m saying is that there is something urgent we need to talk about. I’m hoping you’d keep an open mind for it.”

Tony stared lackluster at her, “Forgive me, the disguise is kinda distracting. Although, I must say, you do look lovely with short, choppy, honey-blonde hair and brown eyes. Then again, you’ve always looked lovely in everything. I absolutely like the sprinkle of freckles across your cheeks. Very charming. Makes you seem less…_backstabber-y_.”

Natasha rolled her eyes and left out a dainty huff, “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind, Stark.”

The billionaire gave her a press-winning smile, “You’re most welcome, Ms. Romanoff.” The smile went away as soon as it appeared to give way to a more cutting one, “But, I think we’re way past the point of masks now, wouldn’t you agree? So, why don’t we drop all the bullshit, get whatever this is over with and go back to those blissful moments of not being in each other’s presence. What do you say?”

She let out a small sigh, pulling off the wig and the veil. She didn’t expect anything else from Tony. The man could be difficult when he wants to be, more so to those he deemed unlikable. Ross’ favorite bar had been proof of that. Tony practically glowed brighter than a million Arc reactors combined with glee whenever he talked about the time he bought the establishment and razing it to the ground.

Setting aside her disguise, she decided to get straight to the point, “I’m here to talk to you about Steve—“

Tony snorted in disgust, “I knew it. Never expected anything else from you lot. You’re all about Rogers. Steve this, Captain America that. You’ve all drank the Kool-Aid.”

“He’s not…” she started, pausing as she tried to think of a way to put it delicately whilst ignoring the insult, “…in his right mind, Tony.”

Letting that hang in the air, she should have remembered that Tony Stark liked to smash all of her expectations to smithereens. Roaring laughter wasn’t the reaction she had expected to that statement. He almost fell out of his seat as he bowled over and clutching his abdomen.

“Tony, this is serious. Steve needs hel—“

“Nikola Tesla…freaking Thor…I’m sorry.” Tony cut in as he gasped, obviously anything but as he wiped the tears that sprang in his eyes with his shoulders still shaking with amusement. “You’re the _second_ person from the cult of Steve Rogers to say that shit and to think that you stabbed me in the back to remain in the good graces of the _just a boy from Brooklyn_.”

“I did what I thought was right, Tony.” Natasha was not going to bother with refuting Tony’s statement about betraying him. She did turn her back on him because she believed it was for a good reason and they all paid for it, Rhodes and Tony more than the rest.

“Obviously. Captain America is the standard for all that’s good and right in the world after all.”

Even though she kept her visage unreadable, she had the urge to scream at him at the top of her lungs as she clawed his eyes out, like a typical angry woman.

Was it because she was bursting at the seams with everything that she had hidden from this man?

Maybe it was the _fear_ fraying her nerves that the man the Avengers once thought of as someone to look up to was going to finally lose it and harm everyone, she’ll not be enough to stop him thus coating her ledger in more blood.

Perhaps it was the knowledge that no matter which way she chose, she was still going to lose parts of her new family.

Or most likely, all of it.

Partnered with the resentment she originally had for Tony along with how quickly he had denounced her as a friend before she left and then the enmity he had for those that left him.

“I had to make a choice. I let them go back at the airport because it was the right one. Steve wanted to stop Zemo from activating the other Winter Soldiers.” She snapped, eyes narrowing in her irritation.

“Did he tell you that vital piece of the puzzle _before_ Leipzig or after you met up in Wakanda? Not that it’d be a change in routine for you two since you always share everything.”

“Neither. I found out about the other Soldiers from Sam when we were still in Wakanda. I only knew about Steve wanting to apprehend Zemo.” Natasha’s voice was a touch dismal as she replied, “I let him and the Soldier go because I’ve known Steve enough to tell that if it things didn’t go as he planned, he’ll just resort to more dangerous methods. I had to let him go.”

“That’s cute.” Tony mocked with a shake of his head, “Do we really have to rehash everything from the past year to see how your _noble_ _sacrifice_ made things better? Not that we need to, we both know that your sacrifice ended up being a false move.”

A repulsor to the chest would have hurt less, “Are you actually blaming _me _for everything, Tony?” she surmised dully.

“Not everything, some of it.” Tony responded with an honest ease, “Because I’m done with being the designated whipping boy and scapegoat. We all had a hand in this mess and you assholes should stop looking down on me from Rogers’ high horse. Time for you to own up to your own mistakes. Bruce was right when he said the Avengers are a time bomb, a chemical mixture of chaos waiting to blow up in our faces. We were just too busy with the bullshitery to see it. But if I have to pick one moment where it all _really_ went south—it started before Novi Grad. Then, it plummeted faster after Ultron.”

Natasha’s mouth went dry at the mention of Bruce. Tony obviously didn’t mean to but it still hurt how Bruce left without a trace. How the man turned his back on their promise to build a life together. It reminded her of the first few months she tried to look for him and came up with nothing.

Also, there was something odd about the way Tony uttered the words, like he wants to imply something and it’s not just about putting some of the blame at her feet. Opting to keep that for later, she answered, “I already told you. I did it to protect the team.”

“The last time I checked you sided with me because you said having a hand on the wheel will help in protecting the team.”

“Steve also wanted to protect the team that’s why he went after Zemo on his own. We should’ve listened to his side too.”

“Did the air in Wakanda really do something to your head, Romanoff? He and Wilson _broke the law_ when they went after Barnes in Romania.” He spat through gritted teeth, “You were there when I made the calls before they were brought in for questioning to have lawyers represent them so we could help them and hear their side. The only thing we were asking for is they sign the Accords, that way Ross would have no way of using that fiasco against them.”

“Tony, all I am saying is that people would have died like in Vienna had Steve and the Soldier not been able to stop Zemo. That’s why I let them go. Yes, that decision didn’t end well for the team but it did stop a sociopath from being a puppet master to a group of killing machines.”

Some kind of realization colored Tony’s eyes and all the air seemed to have left him as he breathed a shaky, “_What the hell_?”

Natasha frowned at the reaction, “Tony?” There was a sickly cast to his complexion and his breathing was getting too fast.

“_Sonofabitch_.” Tony whispered before doing that breathing exercise that she saw Bruce teach him. When he got his breathing closer to normal, he only repeated the curse while pressing the heels of his palms over his eyes. “Goddamn sonofabitch.”

Seeing Tony like this made something click in the back of her mind.

_Бля._

Natasha was right all along.

There was more to what occurred in Siberia than what Steve told the rest of them. She tried to get answer on her own but access to Tony was impossible back then. Not with Pepper on a rampage and using available SI resources to make sure Tony and Rhodes were out of reach. Asking T’challa was no use as the King opted to stay mum and outside of their group, regardless of hosting them in his kingdom. There was also Soldat who never said anything that might contradict Steve’s version of the events. Then again, the other supersoldier was in cryo when Steve told about everyone about Siberia, which meant that Steve had probably told Soldat that he would give everyone the real version of the events to keep him from speaking out. All in all, logistics were perfectly set up for Steve to make his account of the events believable.

Dammit.

She had to confirm it first, however. “What do you mean, Tony?”

“That asshole didn’t tell you about Siberia, did he?” he grounded, yanking his hands away from his face. “Out of everyone, you were the closest to him and he lied to you too.”

She mulled over that for second, taking in Tony’s barely contained anger and disbelief, “He said you attacked him and the Soldier when you went after them in the bunker.”

“Oh, my God. That bastard really played the same game on you. The game you two used to play on me.”

“Tony, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” A bit more and she would draw her answer from Tony. Natasha only hoped that, for now, she would be _wrong_.

“Romanoff, you oughta know. You and Rogers liked to share juicy bits of gossip with each other.” Tony returned with a cynical croon.

Her eyes widened a moment later when she realized what he meant. Something only she and Steve knew about Tony…

“Your parents.” She murmured, her hands clutching the folder as if they have a mind of their own, “You found out about HYDRA sending the Winter Soldier to kill your parents.”

“Ding, ding, ding, ding! There’s the clever gal we all know.” Tony replied with a harsh, lifeless chuckle. “And it seems like I’m right. You’ve known for _years_. You and Rogers lied to me.”

Heavy, blunt pressure bloomed in her chest, “I would have told you, Tony. Steve promised he would tell you himself. I didn’t—“

“_You didn’t know_? I guess that’s what we should call this game we have then. The I know, but you don’t game. You will know shit about me that I don’t know, then later you’ll find another shit regarding me that you apparently, aren’t supposed to know about. But all we gotta remember is that the secrets are always about me as per game master Rogers’ rules.”

Another sharp bark of incredulity erupted from Tony’s throat, “Rogers’ a real piece of work isn’t he? I’m not talking about Rebirth. Sometimes my team mates don’t tell me things.”

Natasha could tell he was quoting Steve with the last part.

“Wanna know when he told me that? When we were hiding in Barton’s homestead. He was disappointed to find out Bruce and I were messing with the scepter behind your backs, thus he left me with that _oh so inspirational_ quote. The fucking hypocrite. Preaching about honesty when he was the one keeping secrets for his own benefit for years.”

“How did you find out?” she asked wearily, not even bothering to hide the fatigue that seeped into her bones.

Tony looked away and stared at the cradle he had set aside earlier, “Zemo got his hands on the surveillance tape that showed Barnes chasing Howard’s Mercedes in a motorcycle. He showed the video to us when we found him in the bunker.”

She closed her eyes and rubbed a hand on her forehead. Natasha would carve her own lungs out if she was wrong in thinking that Steve tried to downplay what happened. “And that’s why you attacked them.”

“I watched a video of my mother, whom I believed to have died because of Howard’s alcoholism for decades, be strangled to death by a brainwashed assassin with said assassin standing right _next_ to me. And Rogers…I asked if he knew. At first, he tried to bullshit his way out of it, saying he didn’t know it was Barnes. Bastard tried to hold onto the lie, he’s committed I’ll give him that. ”At this, he let out a wilting laugh, “I asked again and when he said yes, I lost it. What did you expect?”

Her fingers released their grip on the folder, “I’m sorry, Tony.” She would have reached for him and held his hand just like she used to. Touch was something Tony had appreciated from those he cared about and despite of his cautiousness with her, he still welcomed her touch.

He liked to physically stick closer to her than the rest bar Bruce, especially during movie nights. She had to admit, it did make her feel a little special. A bond they have. Not as strong as the one she had with Steve but a bond nonetheless. However, it could just be because he liked to be close enough to see what she would do next. “Had I known that Steve never told you, I would have. None of this would have happened to our team.”

Crackling tension quickly replaced the mellow atmosphere the moment she finished the las statement. Brown eyes narrowed sharply as he snapped, “_Your_ team. Not _our_ team. I was _never_ a part of it. You were clear with that from the very beginning. Iron Man, yes. Tony Stark, no. Remember? Let’s not forget how you betrayed me because you can’t shake your loyalty to Rogers.”

“Is that what this is all about then, Tony? Your _wounded_ _ego_?” Natasha countered using the same cursed lines.

“_My _wounded ego?” Tony laughed sarcastically before leaning over the teacher’s table, “You, dear lady, are a _hypocrite_. If there’s anyone between the two of us who had wounded the other’s ego, it’s not you.”

The acerbic response she was about to unleash died in her throat.

Yeah, right on the money.

Tony Stark wasn’t called a genius for nothing after all.

With how _soft _Tony was most of the time, it was easy to forget that he was also known as ruthless in the boardroom. Seeing as he grew up in the cutthroat world of business, she should have known he would not hesitate to aim for the jugular.

“We have agreed to shake all pretenses off and that includes the kiddie gloves, Romanoff.” When she didn’t respond, Tony continued with a bleak grin, “I’m done pulling punches with you. You keep throwing that damned assessment and my so-called ego to my face when in reality you made that report mostly out of _spite_.”

“I didn’t lie when I reported that you’re a loose cannon, Tony. You were unstable and a train wreck straight to hell.” She retorted, locking eyes with the man.

“Because I was dying!” he snapped, slamming his hands on the table, “If you’re actually _that_ good with profiling then you would have noticed that something was wrong from the get go. But that’s the problem isn’t it? _You_. _didn’t_. _notice_. It rubbed you the wrong way because some dying asshole unwittingly pulled one over the famous Black Widow. That report was bullshit. Just word salad and frustrations combined.”

It was the first time she had heard Tony speak to anyone with vitriol. If it could be called that. Natasha took in the tension radiating from his frame and the tears he quickly blinked away. No, vitriol wasn’t it, even if it sounded like that.

It was_ sorrow_.

Tony was still mourning their little family even after he had the New Avengers get him out of the wreckage the Civil War left behind. The loss of what was once something he held close to him and what could have been a more genuine bond had he been given a chance. He never got that single chance because that assessment had been the basis of how the team viewed Tony.

Even Steve, despite of his _love _for Tony.

Come to think of it, the assessment must have been the catalyst to Steve’s obsession. It encouraged the idea that Tony needed someone to guide and protect him from himself, something Steve strongly believed in. Ice slid down her spine at the thought of adding Tony’s blood to her ledger. Everything pointed to it if she remained sitting on her ass and doing nothing.

“You’re right.” She whispered, keeping her eyes on him. “That’s what it was. The assessment was partly to challenge you like Fury wanted and mostly out of spite.”

“What did you say?”

“You heard me.”

A part of her wanted to laugh at herself when he flinched in disbelief.

Apparently, the only way she would be able to pull the rug from under the genius’ feet was with the _truth_.

“If I’m not sure that I’ve already given up drugs way back in the ‘90s, I’d say that right now, I’m definitely on mushrooms marinated in lean, seasoned with LSD and blow. Did you just say _I’m right_?” The fight evaporated out of Tony as he slumped back in his seat, “What the fuck, Romanoff.”

It was her turn to let out a bit of laughter, if it were anyone else she would’ve gone for a jab to the throat but this was Tony not anyone else, “Tony…”

“I must be. My sanity’s just hanging by a thread, please for Thor’s sake, take it back. The last time you agreed with me, my best friend ended up paralyzed and me almost dying in a frozen wasteland after Rogers smashed the arc reactor powering my suit with his shield. Then, I have to clean up after you all fucked off to one bumfucknowhere to the next to continue your vigilantism. So with all due disrespect, take it back.”

She had found some reports about Tony being held in ICU after Vision and a rescue team collected him from the bunker. Natasha didn’t get access to the medical records but to think Steve had been the one to deal the shot that almost killed Tony was a surprise.

“I can’t take it back, I’m afraid.”

_I wish I could._

“You’re damn right, you can’t.”

Natasha closed her eyes and looked down for a while.

That was it then.

Deciding to bite the bullet she stood up and moved to the front, “I have something for you.” She said sliding the folder on the table towards the man. Tony’s eyes flitted from the folder to her face, hesitant to accept the file.

“What’s this?”

She shrugged and gestured to the file, “You’ll be the judge.”

The genius picked up the folder with a scowl. Upon opening, Tony’s gaze slid over the files and he immediately slammed it close, “Why the fuck do you have this?” he snarled, rising from his seat.

“I’m a spy, Tony. Gathering intel is what I do.” The cool tone she used didn’t lessen any of Tony’s ire if the way he was glowering at her was to be believed.

“You fuckers really want me to return to bending over backwards for you that you’re going to use an innocent kid against me. Is that it?” She’d known about people glaring daggers but this expression on Tony’s face went beyond the threat of heads rolling. This was the Merchant of Death vowing to exact his revenge and then some.

Natasha lifted her hands palms facing Tony in a calming manner, “That’s not what this is about, Tony. Listen to me first.”

“Like fuck it isn’t.” he growled, his fist hitting the folder, “You better make this explanation good Romanoff, because I am three seconds away from calling for a suit and incinerating the Avengers, starting with _you_.”

Tony’s history as Iron Man was enough proof that he wasn’t lying. All of his enemies tended to die and she knew it was only out of debilitating grief and lingering ties to Steve that the supersoldiers survived the wrath of Iron Man back in that Siberian bunker. Hearing how easy it would be for him to eliminate her didn’t hurt. At least, if she told herself enough times she’d start to believe it.

After a slightly tremulous exhale, she explained, “After the initial assessment, Fury asked me to keep updating each Avenger file. The fight against the Mandarin is well-documented and few leads had mentioned something about you working with some man called Gary and a child. Gary was easy to track since he works for a local network but the kid was where the challenge lied. When I reported to Fury about not finding anything substantial, he decided that we’d let it go because he believed you have it under control—“

“That still doesn’t explain _how_ the hell you created a goddamn file on Harley.”

“It’s not me who assembled that file, it’s Steve.” She shot coolly, leveling Tony with her most pointed look. “That’s a duplicate dossier I made from the one he had.”

Tony chewed over that for while then, he groaned and sat back down, “Am I really supposed to believe that Rogers carried out a _covert_ intel gathering mission on his own? He was running missions for SHIELD before yes, but let’s face it, you’re the one doing the actual spying for him back then. The guy’s about as subtle as those stupid, romanticized mosquitoes from Twilight that bathed in vats of liquid highlighter and cornstarch when they’re under the sun.”

Natasha’s lips twitched in a smile as she leaned sideways against the table, “True. But this time, I’m not part of it. I’m actually surprised myself when he told me about the kid. He said it was by pure coincidence that he found out about Harley. It’s through Happy.”

“Now wait a minute—“

“Calm down, Shellhead.” She interjected, “I’m not saying Happy told Steve anything. Steve said that he found out about the kid on one of his visits to the MET. Turned out that your kid’s school went there for a field trip. He said he was quite far from them in the Arms and Armor and there were a lot of people, so Happy didn’t notice him. Supersoldier hearing was an advantage because Steve picked up bits and pieces of their conversation, including Harley’s name and things like hanging out with you in the lab with the bots. Steve got all the information he needed when a classmate wearing the school hoodie bade Harley goodbye. Steve got his full name and the school, the rest is history.”

Silence reigned over them for a minute as Tony thumbed through the whole file, wincing every time he came across a picture of the kid with him or one with the two of them as well as another boy eating burgers.

“How did you say you got this again?”

Slight crease formed between her brows, Tony sounded alarmingly muted. Squashing the little seed of dread within her, she replied.

“Downloaded them from Steve’s computer, the transcripts are from the emails he exchanged with a private investigator. Well, it was not exactly a private investigator but a former SHIELD agent, Russell Alcocer. The guy now works for the Accords Council. He works under the committee that holds the protection program for children that got involved in missions ran by the enhanced.”

Tony ran a hand over his face and she grimaced inwardly. This must be hurting the man a lot, considering it was one of the amendments in the Accords that Tony supported. His eyes met hers and he nodded, signaling her to continue. 

“Steve sent in a report about Harley. According to the emails, Steve informed Alcocer about the kid’s involvement with the Mandarin and said that Harley technically fell under the protection program since he was involved in the Mandarin incident.”

“If that were the case, these reports should have been sent to me. I was the one who got Harley involved.”

“Steve pulled rank.” She answered casually, making a show of examining her nails, “The same question came up but since Steve’s team leader at the time, you and Harley are his responsibility. He got the go signal only by default—you omitted the kid’s involvement in the incident from your reports…” Natasha watched the agitation in Tony’s face as he processed what she was saying.

“In a way, that meant I’m washing my hands off him.” He finished for her, “Ergo, following protocols, the responsibility will fall on the team leader. So, if he got pulled into another mess with any enhanced, Steve will be the one to handle everything.”

“Exactly.”

“Why? _Why_?” Tony asked, winded as though they were back in the glory days, all six of them training together and Steve was making him run on the treadmill. “Where the hell does he get off with this shit?!”

A grimace then showed itself on her face. The last one was the million dollar question but not exactly one she was keen on answering lest Tony end up having a cardiac arrest.

“But that’s not the real question here.” Tony said gravely and dropped the folder on the table to look up at her, “What’s this about, Romanoff? Why are you telling me this? Wouldn’t it be better if this caught me unawares? You know, to get back at my evil, narcissistic ass? Something you all can laugh about back in the Compound?”

The tremulous grin belied the nonchalance in his voice.

“As cliché as it sounds, I don’t want to laugh at you, Tony. I want to laugh _with_ you.” she hooked a chair with her foot and sat on it, “I remember what you said in that presscon after Afghanistan. You don’t want to be a part of a system comfortable with not having accountability because lack of accountability that makes us part of the problem. I want to do better. Like you said, it’s time to own up to my mistakes. If I don’t, I’ll be stuck being a cog in the machine that create the problem.” She picked on the hem of one of her sleeves, “Starting with the evaluation, I told you earlier that most of what I wrote in it was frustration. It’s because I…I, resented you Tony.”

Tony dropped his gaze into his laced fingers at that, “Not surprising...we didn’t really like each other that much in the beginning. But I guess, I was the only one who thought we could get past that.”

“Hear me out, it’s not all on you though…you’re right about me getting angry about you being able to pull one on me. I hated that sometimes you’d see right through me because no one is supposed to…but, there’s you. I saw that an arrogant, spoiled man-child would get the best of me at times—it grated on me. Then, when the team came together, you started proving that report wrong time and time again, it felt like a slap in the face. I could only twist the knife by bringing up ‘your ego’ every now and then to get back at you. Later on, I realized that it’s not about you seeing through me. It’s because while it hadn’t been a lifetime for you, you do know what it’s like to be unmade. You’ve been unmade but you built yourself back up into a better you. You went to Afghanistan as the Merchant of Death and came back as Iron Man while I have left the Red Room but nothing changed. I was still smearing blood on my ledger. ”

“Romanoff…”

“So this is me, trying to do something and be a part of the solution.” She looked up and met Tony’s wide-eyed look with her own wobbly grin.

Tony sighed before worrying his lower lip between his teeth, “Okay…that’s, uh, good. For you.”

“Tony, I know it’s hard to believe—“

“You don’t say.”

The words diminished the rest of what she was going to say.

“It’s hard to believe? I don’t even know what I’m supposed to believe here. You say you hated me for being the better version of myself but I don’t really see it. Or better yet, that’s not the only reason. You disliked me because I don’t blindly follow the script you set up. Like Rogers does. He listens to you and that endeared him to you because he readily _believes in people_. I don’t. I have a lot of reasons not to. You hated me because I got better, I see through you and I don’t believe you. To be honest, I don’t even know why I gave you the time of the day when I know I’m only going to be subjected to more manipulation from you. I must be feeling nostalgic. So, you want to be part of the solution that’s why you’re here informing me of Rogers’ plan for my kid. Okay, good. Thanks. You’re job’s done, I’ll take it from here.” He stood up and grabbed the folder, walking towards the door. “I’m not going to sit here listening to you and twiddle my thumbs as I anxiously wait for when you’re going to stab me again in the back. Good day, Ms. Romanoff. Let’s not do this _ever_ again.”

“I have to stick close to Steve to make sure his obsession with you won’t push him to do something that’ll harm everyone.” She intoned with all the joie de vivre of a graveyard, making Tony stop and his hand fall away from the door handle. “He fully believes he’s in love with you Tony. He’s been in love with you right from the start.”

He didn’t say anything but to her great relief, he abandoned the idea of leaving.

“You said no more masks, Tony. That’s why I’m here. Yes, Steve is my friend but so are you. I said I want to be a part of the solution and here I am trying to let you know that I don’t think I can continue doing this alone anymore. Steve’s getting worse. He needed help and I knew from the very beginning but I didn’t do a damn thing. With all of us living together before, it was easier to distract him and he’s satisfied just being around you. I got arrogant and thought that would be it. Leipzig happened and I have to choose. Stay with you and face the consequences of letting him and the Soldier go or run away and go along with Steve so I could continue keeping an eye on him.”

Tony turned quickly to face her with a sneer, “Really, Romanoff? That’s the best that you can do? Rogers is quote unquote _obsessed_ _with_ _me_? You know I’d sooner believe you if you had said that he’s into BDSM and every night he’s sucking Wilson off while Barnes is ramming him from behind.” He gave a full body shudder in disgust, “Not a great picture but you get what I’m saying. I mean, what part of Rogers beating me within an inch of my life and leaving me to die in Siberia to protect Barnes sound like the man is in love with me?”

“He is, Tony.” Natasha insisted, a sharp pang lodging itself in her chest at the dismissal. For a second she recalled the times Tony claimed or mentioned something and they were skeptical about it. It must have hurt worse, considering even _Bruce_ doubted him sometimes. “That’s why he keeps on trying to make you to come back to the team.”

“You said you’ve known from the very beginning? Uh, you do realize that we just both agreed that I _shouldn’t_ put much stock in your super profiling abilities, right? And the keeping an eye on him thing? That’s really creepy. You sound like you’re handling him. Not a good look. Huh, maybe the BDSM thing isn’t quite far off then, since he’s okay with you leading him around.” Tony replied, rolling his eyes, “Look, here are the facts: Rogers said fuck you to all 117 countries and called upon half of the Avengers to protect _Barnes_. If you want to declare Rogers is in love with someone, you’re barking at the wrong tree. He’s not in any way in love with me, it’s as clear as the Arc reactor is blue that Rogers went to war for his ladylove, Bucky Barnes.”

“You said you wanted the truth, Tony.” She hissed, they were getting nowhere and Tony was adamant in not listening. Natasha had banked on giving the information on the kid would make Tony believe her.

“You should just stick to lying then, because you’re much better at it.” He shot back, this time fully intending to make it hurt. “You want to throw in that Rogers keeps on bugging me—with your help at that—because he is crazy about me, fine. But, all of this point out that he only wants me back on your team because of the perks. The Compound’s not enough because he could recognize that the gear the suits are providing you with now are way below the standards of what I used to outfit you guys with. You’re using the he’s in love with me argument to appeal to my sentiments because I used to feel hero worship for the man. That tactic used to work all the time when you want to make me do something for you back in the day. Keywords: _Used_ _to_. Give it up, Romanoff. I’m a scientist. I’m seeing all the variables here and my math is sound. All of what you’re saying is bullshit.”

The music of AC/DC broke the quiet and Tony pulled his phone out, “FRI? What’s up?”

“I’m afraid you’re not seeing all of them, Boss.” FRIDAY piped up cryptically and played a video.

Natasha had never been one to fully believe in miracles or divine intervention. However, she was ready to recant the prior statement as they watched the video of Steve, almost unrecognizable in his madness, fighting the equally enraged Soldier. 

Divine intervention was the only explanation she could give as to why the AI decided to help her. Thank God for FRIDAY.

** _  
_ **

** _‘_ ** _C’mon, Bucky. I already told you how I feel about Tony. I mean, I know there’s no way that we can have a baby of our own…just let me have this.’_

While watching the video, she also watched how Tony would react to seeing solid proof of her claims. In any other circumstances, she would have laughed at the scandalized look on Tony’s face. He seemed to be greatly disturbed by the implication that Steve dreamed of having children with him.

_'__You son of a bitch! Are you actually trying to justify this…this bullshit by pulling lies out of your ass? You can’t get him to talk to you, so what, you’re going to trap him with engineered babies? Do you actually think he’d agree to that _garbage_ you’re planning?’_

Oh?

If Tony was disturbed by Steve’s actions, he was unmistakably _flustered_ by seeing the Soldier defending him. That’s…interesting.

Both of them were pulled back into paying attention to the video by the rise in Steve’s voice.

_‘IT’S NOT LIKE THAT! Why would you ever think that?! I just want Tony to listen to me!’_

_‘The hell it isn’t. Stop lying! How the fuck are you going to explain all that research you’ve been doing, huh?! As if Stark would actually be interested in genetics, it’s not even his field you fucking idiot!’_

_'WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW?! YOU DON’T KNOW A THING ABOUT TONY! YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT US! IT’S NOT ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS IF I LOOK FOR WAYS TO CREATE OUR OWN FAMILY! WE DON’T FUCKING NEED YOU! YOU’RE NO ONE IMPORTANT TO HIM! STOP TRYING TO GET BETWEEN US! YOU’RE JUST THE GODDAMN HYDRA BASTARD THAT KILLED HIS PARENTS!’_

She didn’t find out what exactly went down during that fight but Natasha was sure that she was mirroring the horror plastered on Tony’s face. The video shows that the whole situation was worse than she thought if Steve’s willing to go that road.

“This was hours before we found Barnes in that construction site, Boss.” FRIDAY added after the video stopped playing. Tony’s hands were shaking that he nearly dropped his phone.

“W-what? What the fuck’s going on?” He looked at Natasha, eyes wide almost unseeing.

“Tony…” she ventured slowly, she didn’t know how FRIDAY got a hold of the video. Maybe she was working with the Soldier since she mentioned meeting him. She’ll need to ask the man later.

“Are you ready to listen to me now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's right, Natasha. Thank God for FRIDAY.  
This also goes out to the folks who wanted to find out how Steve came to know about Harley.
> 
> I have mixed feelings with this chapter. I'm not sure if I really do want to post it because I want to strangle BOTH Natasha and Tony. The only saving grace is FRIDAY...Like always, because she's a queen among queens. Thank you for reading!


	8. Life isn't fair, it's just fairer than death, that's all.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Tony…”she said monotonously, staring at him dead in the eye, “What do you think is the worst form of torture that can be done to a woman?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
It's been a while since I updated and I believe it's time for me to give this fic some more love.  
I hope you enjoy this.
> 
> First, I want to inform everyone that I am **in no way** an expert when it came to LAW or PSYCHOLOGY. I only read several articles and visited a few government sites for the information I included here. And I tried to understand them as much as I can for this chapter. 
> 
> Two, there are parts that may be triggering, please proceed with caution.
> 
> Not beta read. All mistakes are mine.

Silence reclaimed its reign over the room several seconds after FRIDAY finished playing the clip. Tony had gone eerily unresponsive that Natasha worried if the man had truly gone into cardiac arrest if not for the blinking.

“Thank you, FRIDAY.” Tony said to his AI, voice devoid of any inflection.

“I want to thank you as well FRIDAY. Good thing you got to access the surveillance in the Compound. ” Natasha added, the AI deciding to show that footage was a blessing she would be foolish to sneer at.

“I have no use for your pretty words, _Quadruple_ _cross_.” FRIDAY replied vehemently, “I didn’t do it for you.”

“FRIDAY, that’s enough.”

“Boss…”

“I’ll be fine, baby girl. Besides, you’re not out of the woods yet…now that I know there are some things you’re not telling me too.” The billionaire chided gently.

Natasha had to suppress a smile, she always did think it was oddly endearing that Tony treated his AIs and bots like they were his actual children.

“I’m sorry, Boss.”

“I know. We’ll catch up later.” He told the AI who only responded with her usual ‘Yes Boss’ before he turned to Natasha with uncharacteristically dim eyes, putting his phone back into his pocket, “You were asking if I’m ready to listen. I still have time, I’ll hear you out.”

“Tony…”

“I have a schedule to keep, Romanoff. I have somewhere to be and according to the call I got before you came in, they need me for something ASAP. We’ve wasted enough times as it is. _Talk_.” Tony said, going back to his previous seat and prompting her go back to hers.

Looking at Tony right now, she debated whether she should tell him everything. It was obvious how badly shaken he was and that he was having difficulty in processing what just happened. Natasha knew that telling him was the right thing, though Tony did have a history of taking everything in too much. What really worried her was that she couldn’t exactly pinpoint what Tony was going to do—the only thing she could tell for sure was that he would be the one that would end up hurt if he decided to do something rash. That would go against her original objective of keeping him from harm and something she wanted to avoid.

“I think I should go.” She said after going through her mental list of pros and cons.

Tony startled, his voice raising a few notches in pitch, “_What_? Really, Romanoff? Now that I’m willing to listen, you’re going to split?”

“This isn’t going to end well.” She reasoned calmly, “You need to process what we have talked about first before we jump into this one. You’re running on confusion and raw nerves, Tony and that’s never good on anybody.”

“Spare me the psychobabble shit, will you? I get enough of that from my actual shrink whom I pay an exorbitant amount of money even though I rarely follow any of her suggestions. Talk, damn you.” Tony spat through gritted teeth.

Natasha stared at Tony unblinking for a moment before she conceded. She had also forgotten that the genius was stubborn as a mule. He’d do anything to reach his objective. The only person in the world that could go toe to toe with that trait of Tony’s was Steve himself.

It was perhaps another thing that drew Steve to him. They’ve always been contrary to each other that it wound up being a case of opposites attract. In Tony’s case though, the attraction was obviously some wistful childhood fantasy he had outgrown a long time ago. Steve, on the other hand, was new to the experience.

She wasn’t referring to being attracted to a man per se, although Natasha did suspect it with how easy it was for him to accept his apparent attraction to Tony and how he had doggedly chased after Soldat when SHIELD went down_._ Then again, there had been talks of how unusual Steve Rogers’ and Bucky Barnes’ friendship had been. She had already asked Soldat about it and the man only gave her a look that would have made a bunch of knife-shaped cotton seem like a katana with how dull it was.

_Steve is to me what Barton is to you, Natalyushka—a brother. I can do kinky but I am not _that kind_ of kinky_.

_I’m aware, Soldat. I still remember when you had passionately mentioned wanting to fuck _someone_ through the floor._

A small twitch erupted at one corner of her lips from remembering the deathly glare that the Soldier gave her for that response but she quickly smothered it for Tony might take it the wrong way.

“I’m not entirely sure how you’re going to react to everything I’m going to say. I think we should have a small break, maybe a day or two, just so you can calm down.”

Tony rolled his eyes, “You’ve lived with me for years and you still don’t have an idea how I get when forced to wait anxiously. I am here, trying my best to listen—calmly—to whatever you’re going to say and you tell me that we should postpone it? Why prolong the agony? It’s better to rip the Band-Aid off and be done with it.”

Natasha mulled over that for a second before replying, “And if it opened old wounds?”

The genius chuckled bleakly, shrugging, “You didn’t seem that concerned when you sneaked in here and just dropped several bombshells on my lap earlier. If you’re worried about me bleeding, that ship has sailed, darling.”

“Tony, you’re upset. I don’t think having to take in everything all at once is a good idea.”

If anything, her words had taken on an opposite effect instead of calming him down as she intended. Tony looked a few seconds away from blowing a gasket.

“Thanks for stating the obvious. Upset? Damn right, I’m upset. The person who had repeatedly stabbed me in the back just decided to waltz into the venue of a program my company is sponsoring and tell me that the man whom I thought I could actually trust is not yet done with playing God when it came to secrets regarding people I care about. Of course, I’m upset! And can you please, again for the last fucking time, stop with the pseudo-psychology you’re doing because you’re making it worse. You really want us to put this for another day? _Fine_. Remember what happened when Rogers’ pet witch fucked with our heads?”

Natasha, as well-trained as she was, almost didn’t stop flinching from Tony’s words.

“We got away after that right? We all know what happened. What was the result of me stewing on that _fear? _It ate at me so badly that I had to make sure that what Maximoff showed me would never come true. At the time, I was all anxiety and horror mixed the fact I didn’t exactly know what I’m dealing with. The only thing went through my head was to prevent that nightmare from coming to life. Now, you’re here with all the answers I could use to understand the situation better, to create the more appropriate countermeasures and you’re telling me to keep thinking about all of this for a little longer and let the anxiety become all-consuming?”

The ranted confession took her by surprise. It may have been the anger talking but still.

Tony Stark admitting to a weakness?

To a perceived enemy at that.

It was mind-boggling to say the very least.

Then again, it was only surprising to anyone who would hear because Tony Stark, as he had said before, and the suit were one. People could not distinguish one from the other. Iron Man was powerful and so was Tony, both were larger than life. Thus hearing him talk about his own weaknesses was jarring to those listening. For Iron Man to have a weakness was unheard of, almost in the realm of unthinkable.

And therein lied the dilemma: No one gave the fact that the one inside the armor was only human, just like anybody else, much thought.

To them Iron Man was the embodiment of invincible.

_Like what most of the Avengers thought._

If there was anyone in the team who did recognize any trace of that vulnerability in Tony, Natasha could say it was her and Steve. The difference being, she had unconsciously dismissed it immediately when the team came together. That was because she could see the manifestation of the power Tony possessed all around her—money, influence, _the armor_. Steve, however, had seen it as a validation of his views on Tony.

Steve needed Tony and this susceptibility made it clear to him that Tony also needed him. Because he needed it, he wanted Tony to need him too. Seeing any proof that Tony didn’t, like it had been in the Civil War, was gnawing at Steve.

Maybe Tony did, once upon a time.

He needed Steve but not in the way the blond wanted.

It didn’t make sense to Steve because to him: the world was, in one way or another, a solid color.

Black was black.

White was white.

He couldn’t comprehend a world that operated in grays. It was muddying his principles and that was not something he was going to take lightly. However, Tony Stark was a man who lived in a world of grays, much to his disappointment.

To Steve, if the genius really needed colors in his world, then the colors Tony would ever need were his, nothing else.

“I already told you most of it, Tony.” She started almost haltingly, “Steve...didn’t adjust well to suddenly waking up in the future. Everything he knew and loved disappeared or changed as he slept in the ice. It broke something in him. But, I would imagine that even back then, Steve was already suffering from a form of trauma. Could be PTSD due to the war, depression can be added considering he crashed into the ocean shortly after his best friend supposedly died and the world was still at war—“

Tony huffed, crossing his arms over his chest, “Okay, I’ll take the blame this time for not including an additional reminder of sparing me the history of Rogers’ trauma as well. I am not discounting whatever he had gone or is still going through but please just get to the point of _why is he so obsessed with me_.” Tony frowned, “Tesla, I can’t believe I just said that. I feel like I’m going to end up in TikTok.”

It was Natasha’s turn to lean back on her seat and cross her arms, “You’re still not taking this seriously are you?”

“I _am_ taking this seriously, Romanoff. Why the hell would I even give you the time of day if I don’t?” he retorted, running a hand through his hair. “Well? Go on. Continue and pardon the interruption. There, happy?”

She rolled her eyes. He would never fail to be ridiculous when the opportunity presented itself.

“That is the whole point, Shellhead.” Natasha continued and redirecting him to her point mildly, “Steve lost everything in one swoop and is still hurting for it. You being Howard Stark’s son automatically made you an important part of Steve’s life. You’re basically one of the only connection he has with the past no matter how distant. He made you his crutch.”

“Really? So, wait, basically what you’re saying is that the only reason he’s fixated on me is because of my _Dad_?”

She had to admit that the alarm in Tony’s voice was amusing. A little more push and Tony would make the conversation even more outrageous.

“Somehow.” She answered ambiguously.

“Son of a…Please, tell me I’m wrong. For the love of a higher power I don’t believe in, tell me I’m wrong. I don’t think I can take it. I’ve heard the talks about Rogers and B—h-his war buddy, but _Rogers and Howard_?” Tony rambled frantically, miles away from the impervious façade earlier, “Gah! Just getting that out is making my skin crawl. I mean, people know my Dad was obsessed with searching for Rogers before but to think that it could have been because of something between them? And that’s why Rogers is now creeping on me? Fuck it. I’m-I’m out. I can’t deal with this.”

Natasha raised a brow at Tony’s stumbling with the mention of the Soldier. As far as she knew, the only time the Soldier came in contact with Tony—if it could be called that—was being in the same missions and meetings. The last mission with the bots was probably the only time they talked. Then, how would that explain what FRIDAY said earlier? The AI mentioned that they met the Soldier a few hours after his fight with Steve. The Soldier was capable of going around undetected, so how did FRIDAY know where he went after leaving the Compound? Not just that, Tony went to look for him as well. 

Oh, this conundrum was the catnip to her curiosity. She would have to whisk the Soldier away from the Compound for a while so she could press him for answers. Away from prying eyes.

_And don’t forget the volatile, haughty little witch._

_She still has my jacket._

A small frown came over her lips at the thought. She shook it off and replied with a smirk, “Calm down, Stark. That’s your wild imagination talking. Howard Stark’s womanizing was considered to be almost as legendary as the tale of Captain America.”

Tony clucked his tongue, waving a hand towards her, “Uhh…no. It’s your insinuation and the fact that Rogers had a fling with Sharon Carter, whose late aunt was _the_ Peggy Carter that Rogers fell in love with in the war. So, no, not my imagination…it’s creepy but there’s clearly a pattern there.”

Natasha paused at Tony’s offhand observation. If one were to examine the whole thing closely, it did make sense. “I see.”

“See what?” Tony asked, obviously not realizing the implication of what he said beforehand.

“Steve’s reliving his past through everyone around him. The Avengers, you, Soldat and Agent 13. To him, the Avengers act as substitute for the Howling Commandos, you for your father and Sharon for her aunt. The fact that the actual Bucky Barnes had survived was a bonus.”

Tony hissed in what could be a mix of disgust and shock, “Look, I was just trying to keep things light but you really just had to go to the deep, dark end don’t you?”

“But you have to agree it’s a logical conclusion.” She countered pointedly, “Steve is still so hung up on his past despite not showing it outright, he seeks out those even with the slightest connection to it.”

“If that were the case, he should have been fixated on Sharon, not me. I’m the substitute for his engineer friend not his secret agent lady love. I mean, it’s all there—Sharon’s related and is also a secret agent plus can actually give him…babies.” Tony reckoned, paling ever so slightly at the last word.

Natasha knew it wasn’t the thought of infants that terrified him. It was the idea that Steve would no doubt make Tony _have _his children if he found a way. Tony, after all, was actually a baby hugger. One time while she still updating her files on each of the Avengers, she had followed him when he went out of the Tower in the middle of the night. To her surprise, Tony went to a nearby hospital and began chatting with the night shift nurses about the babies before he went into the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. She had heard of the baby hugging program in that particular hospital too, though it never occurred to her that Tony would actually be a volunteer instead of just signing a check for donation. Natasha had decided to keep that one to herself and omit it from Tony’s file. That instance did make her consider volunteering as well, but her line of work apart from being an Avenger also had her changing her mind.

“That’s true. Sharon does check all the boxes in Steve’s list but have you considered that even if that were the case they just don’t click?”

“They just don’t click.” Tony repeated dully, “Romanoff, I’m not there with you and Rogers in DC but I still know that Rogers had a thing with her. That’s as good a sign as anything else that something did click.”

“I can see your point, but think about it. They did hit it off though not like you and Steve did right from the start.”

“The only thing that we wanted to do from the start was hit each other. We couldn’t even spend a few seconds without arguing, what are you on about?”

Well, apparently Tony Stark was a loyal friend to this someone called _Denial_.

“Tony, you can deny it all you want but everyone could tell that you and Steve arguing is actually more of a game for you two, trying to one up the other. Steve didn’t have that with Agent 13—“

“That was also something he had with Thor.”

“Steve is Catholic.”

“Barton!”

“No relation to his past whatsoever.”

Tony rubbed a hand over his face, “Why the hell does it have to be me then? Nix the fact that I’m his old friend’s kid for a moment, okay? I-I’m really confused…why me? Sharon’s right there. They already had a thing going, for fuck’s sake.”

Natasha tilted her head to the side and stared at Tony.

“What?” He barked, “Is there something on my face?”

“I think…” she said, smirk going full bloom, “it’s because Agent 13 is too blonde for his taste.”

Tony’s face fell slack at her words and stayed like so as he deadpanned “I’m going to strangle you.”

“C’mon, Tony…Steve may be Captain America but it doesn’t mean he can’t have a preference when it came to his lovers. Wasn’t Peggy Carter a brunette?”

The billionaire hissed again, this time like an enraged cat, “First of all, I could care less about his preferences at all. Second, that still wouldn’t fly because Barnes has dark hair too. Third, I hope you choke on your next meal for that atrocity you just said.”

“I’m elucidating reasons as you asked, Stark. No need to get angry at the messenger.” She riposted lightly.

“Making conjectures is what you’re doing. And goddammit, I got pulled into your psych BS session yet again.” Tony complained, flailing a hand at her, “Ah fuck it. I need all the variables to this mess and you’re one of the only available sources. Now, to summarize, Rogers is…obsessed with me—it’s never gonna be _not_ weird saying that—because at first, he just wanted me to be a substitute for my dad because he’s trying to cope up with his trauma then for some reason it evolved into that.”

She wanted to say that the reason Steve’s attentions turned into something else might have been Tony’s unconscious ability to draw people in. Then again, that would make it sound like it’s Tony’s fault that Steve was doing all this. Which was not true at all. Trauma or no, Steve was still capable of conscious decisions. He had planned and thought his steps through, unlike the Soldier, whose wrongdoings were without conscious decision-making.

“We could say that.”

“So no definitive reason yet?”

“Unless we have a diagnosis from a professional.”

“Isn’t Wilson like a…therapist? How the hell did he not catch this?”

Natasha had been wondering about that too, but she guessed the shine of red, white and blue was still in effect, in addition to this situation being above his pay grade, “True. He’s a social worker albeit his training veered more towards recognizing signs of PTSD and helping his clients cope with it.”

_Not exactly the same thing as dealing with someone exhibiting signs of covert narcissism and obsessive love disorder. However, with a little push he can be moved to look into the situation more objectively._

Tony planted his elbow on the table and rubbed circles on temple, “Damn.”

“I could try talking to him about this, though. Wouldn’t be easy to do without the others finding out but not impossible. ”

“Yeah. Sure. Knock yourself out.” He groaned, then sitting straighter, “By the way, speaking of being the messenger, this thing with Harley…”

Just like that, their time for a bit of reprieve from the most pressing issue at hand was over.

“What do you want to do about it?” If Tony was right in guessing that Steve was planning to use the kid to get to him, then she and Soldat could perhaps do something behind the scenes to delay Steve’s plans enough for Tony to launch his countermeasures.

“I want to get in touch with Alcocer to get the responsibility over Harley be transferred to me.”

As was the most reasonable response, however they would face several obstacles with that, the first one of being, “Protocols dictate that Steve be informed of such transfer. And the committee must also be given a solid ground for it to happen.”

“I know, Romanoff. I was there when the guidelines were being reviewed by the Accords Council.”

“That’s fair. The thing is, obsession with a fellow enhanced is not exactly covered by the guidelines. If anything, those who support Steve can spin it as you being petty as usual and trying to make Captain America seem like a madman while painting yourself a martyr.”

Tony winced and said, “The video—“

“Won’t be enough. As I said, the committee guidelines don’t exactly cover the issue between you and Steve. If you did cry out that you wanted the transfer to happen because Steve’s in love with you way too much and used the video as proof, an argument could be made that Steve’s only doing what he feels is the best for the people he loves.”

The distraught look on Tony’s face became further pronounced the more she spoke. Not something she liked seeing, but she had to let him consider every viewpoints.

“There’s also the matter of the Soldier…” she paused long enough to gauge Tony’s reaction and wasn’t disappointed when distraught turned into what she could only describe as an embarrassed twist of his lips.

Huh, that was it. She was really going to pester Soldat after this. Something was going on between the two of them and she intended to find out.

“There are still people wary of the Winter Soldier even if he was vindicated in court. And because Steve made it a point to say that the Soldier was under HYDRA, it would make the dichotomy between the two of them much more apparent. Steve is the hero while Barnes is the one who…fell, for the lack of a better word, from grace. People could use the his parting words to Steve and the beaten up state he left Steve in as ‘evidence’ that Steve was only trying to protect the people he ought to protect.”

Tony’s shoulders slumped and he leaned back on his seat, “But keeping Harley safe is my responsibility. Rogers haven’t even met him.” He thought for a moment before adding, “As far as I know.”

“And questions as to why you removed his participation in the Mandarin from your account of the incident will arise. They’ll point out that Steve picked up the slack for you since you refused to have any more connection with Keener.”

“Then, what am I supposed to do? If not that then what can I do? File for a restraining order?” he carped, frustration evidently on the rise. “Let me guess, I can’t do that either because Steve never actually made contact with the kid.”

Ah, so it was still for the kid.

“Yes and no.” She returned, laying her arms on the table and lacing her fingers, “ No, because you can’t file a restraining order on Steve on behalf of Harley. Steve’s well within his rights, as provided by the protection program, to be in contact with him should anything happen. Going by how Steve made the dossier, he’s only monitoring the kid. Nothing much. If you are going to file a restraining order on Steve, you needed solid evidence for that. There are a lot of things in this situation that Steve can use as loopholes. Family Court cases are quite tricky.”

“Family Court?” He said, perplexed, “I’m not filing for a protection order for DV or a petition for child custody.”

“In some way, you would actually. For DV, I mean.” She replied, “The state of New York can think of your filing a protection order against Steve is due to a family offense. You and Steve could be regarded as being in an intimate relationship before so—“

“Wait, just hold on.” Tony said holding his palm up, “_Intimate_ relationship? We never were.”

“We all lived together in the Tower for some years, Tony. Everyone knew that. We’re all on the same team but everybody knows that you and Steve had been really close. People have seen you two go out for dinner for, what, twice a week back then. Mostly because apart from me, Steve was the only one who stayed in the Tower full-time. Steve’s the only one left in the Tower with you if I have my own missions because Thor was either off world or with Dr. Foster. Clint goes back to the farm in between breaks during missions, Bruce would be doing volunteer work in Asia or attending some conference in Europe. When the Avengers moved Upstate, you still find time to come up and visit us. That’s a pretty intimate relationship. The Family Court defines a relationship as intimate regardless of the nature being sexual or otherwise. They base it on how frequent the interactions happen, how long you’ve known each other and certainty that these interactions are not just casual fraternizations. Steve’s not someone you can actually call a mere acquaintance.”

When Tony didn’t respond, she resumed, “Intimate partner violence is always attributed to romantic relationships but I believe it can also apply here. Steve stalking you, controlling who you spend time with by manipulating missions and meetings—”

“Those are things you helped him with, don’t forget about that. Never forget about that.” Tony snorted, ignoring her narrowed eyes. “On second thought, I ought to be suing your ass for that too. I definitely should.”

“—also the fact that he is of the mind to have children with you through any means necessary to keep you is an indication of violence. Those are red flags for Coercive Control. Don’t even get me started on the fight with the Soldier.”

“The video. Oh, yeah…I won’t, don’t worry."

Natasha sniffed, “Not the fight I’m referring to actually.”

That particular tidbit seemed to rouse Tony’s own curiosity, “Are you saying that the fight in the video wasn’t the only time they tried to off each other in the Compound?”

“Yes, and I’m currently staring at the reason.” She told the man bluntly, prompting another wince, “A day after you and the Soldier nearly shut Twitter down, Steve saw the video where the Soldier blindsided you with that Westley one-liner. He went on a war path, furiously attacked his best friend in the training room because he thought the Soldier was hitting on you.”

Tony jerked back, cringing, “What the fuck?”

Natasha could commiserate with the sentiment though she did notice a rather fetching hint of flush on Tony’s cheeks. Whether from embarrassment or something else entirely, she would still bet all the money she had squirreled away in her off-shore accounts that it wasn’t because of Steve. “Out of control jealousy and possessiveness. Coercion and stalking alone are both solid reasons to petition for family offense, Tony.”

That seemed to put him out the little stupor he slipped into, “May I ask why the hell is it that you seem to know a lot about the law, Romanoff? I can read legalese just fine but fully absorbing everything still makes me call for my lawyers’ assistance.”

Natasha smiled, “Oh, c’mon Mr. Stark. Natalie Rushman was in Legal before she became Ms. Potts’ personal secretary.”

“I thought that was just on paper.”

“Well, I need to back that up with some knowledge to not blow my cover. So, I brushed up on studying a bit about American laws. Coulson was quite happy to help with clearing some things up. Although, I must say, I found Civil procedures and Criminal law more interesting.”

“Huh.” He muttered, “Never thought that spying required that much aside from acting, tech and ass-kicking skills.”

“It’s a tough job.” She smiled.

“No one said it isn’t.” Tony parried, the looked a shade more pensive, “I guess the ‘No’ for filing for a restraining order is for the meltdown that would happen afterwards?”

“Yes. You’re both too high profile for the press to leave it alone, being two of the world’s major superheroes. Besides, imagine the public’s reaction to Iron Man petitioning a protection order against Captain America himself. The world will probably implode.”

“You’re might actually be right. Not to mention, the entire Accords Council will have an aneurysm if this gets out. This is bigger than the little squabbles that they turn a blind eye to unless it gets out in public. But this isn’t exactly something I can just ignore and let slide.”

“I agree. If you are to go through with the restraining order, investigation will occur if Steve denies the allegations. Things like Siberia and the truth about your parents could become public. It’s going to be a bloodbath at every turn, no matter which way of dealing with this you choose.”

Tony pinched the bridge of his nose at the mention of Siberia, “As expected of the man with a fucking plan. He really put me in a landmine of Catch-22s didn’t he?” he snapped.

Natasha could detect a little reluctant admiration in Tony’s voice. She can blame him. Steve’s machinations, when he really put his mind into it, were—admittedly—more effective and devastating than her own. He clearly learned from how sloppy he had handled the secret about the Starks and was using all of what he learned when he chose Harley Keener as the sine qua non in his mission to ensnare Tony.

The more callous part of her admired how subtle Steve’s scheming was. The more humane part was greatly _terrified. _She had been so focused on her own agenda that she had taken her sight of off Steve’s, highly convinced that she was the one pulling his strings. In reality, he was pulling hers as much as she was pulling his, if not more so, making it easy for him to set his own trap without her knowing until it was too late.

Natasha could only nod, “At the moment, all we can do is let him continue with this until we come up with a more concrete solution, but the Soldier and I are coming up with plans to disrupt some of his plans. I think the Soldier is particularly aiming for dismantling the one regarding children.”

The genius’ Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat and worried his lip with his teeth before replying, “About him, Barnes, I mean…can you...” he waved his hands awkwardly as he tried to come up with a continuation.

“Can I what?”

Tony blew a raspberry and sighed, “Nevermind. I’ll deal with it.”

Another song by AC/DC filled the air and Tony quickly took his phone out.

“Shit. He’s calling, probably pissed I’m not there yet.” He mumbled then turned to her, “I need to go.”

Natasha didn’t see who the caller was but she was guessing it was Rhodes, “That’s fine. We’re done here anyway.” Tony gave her a curt, but grateful nod before picking up the file and going to the door. “Oh, and Tony?” she called before he got out.

“I’ll tell the Soldier you said thanks.” She said with a sly grin.

Tony’s eyes widened almost comically then he rapidly shut the door behind him to spite her.

It might have been a minute or two before Natasha decided to leave the laboratory. She stretched her neck side to side and pulled out some of her hair that slipped into the space between her jacket and her nape when her fingers snagged on something under the fold of her jacket’s collar.

Natasha yanked it off and her mouth went dry when saw what it was.

A tracking device.

She felt dread race up and down her spine when she remembered something.

Steve hugged her at the Compound’s lobby before she left to see Tony.

* * *

Tony pulled out every platitude and apology he had learned from years of etiquette lessons in his childhood while on the phone with Reed Richards as Happy drove him to the Baxter Building. Reed was definitely not happy with him being late and was only mollified when his wife, Sue—whom he could hear in the background—helped Tony by reminding her husband that Tony had to attend an event beforehand.

When he arrived at the building he was met with Sue and was led to their spacious living room. Of course, the Baxter Building wasn’t anything like the Stark Tower but it still was luxurious by anyone’s standard.

On the way, Sue told him that Ben and Johnny were in their rooms, sleeping because they were up last night ‘til sunrise taking care of guests. Tony slyly asked if the guests were of the lady kind and Sue replied with a somewhat awkward laugh that he had decided to keep quiet until they reach their destination. 

“I’m really sorry I’m late.” He said as Sue gestured for him to sit on one of the lovely upholstered guest chairs opposite the sofa where Reed sat.

“I know. It's fine.” Reed replied, scratching his neck, “I forgot about your event.”

“See? I already told you over the phone that it’s okay, Tony.” Sue smiled, then made a show of contemplating something, “But I wouldn’t oppose to you bringing something the next time you come over. Hmm, like that chocolate mousse cake you sent over on Johnny’s birthday, perhaps?”

Tony chuckled, “You got yourself a deal, Mrs. Richards.”

“Good.” Sue nodded approvingly, “Why don’t I get you something to drink while you two talk?”

“That would be nice.” He answered and she patted her husband’s shoulder before going to the kitchen.

Tony felt that whatever the reason Richards called him here would be huge. Reed was a generally likeable guy, a bit eccentric, yes, but what genius wasn’t. Thing was Reed’s episodes of being visibly bothered about something outside of Fantastic Four missions and his experiments where far in between. He knew Reed could get a bit lost in his own thoughts sometimes. He would know since it was something they shared, however whatever was on Reed’s mind at the moment seemed remarkably heavy for the man to be this solemn.

“Okay, big guy.” He started good-humoredly in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere. “If this is about me trying to work around your suggestions for my suit instead of really integrating them in my designs, I apologize. I promise, I’ll work them into the next suit and then double, no, triple the chocolate mousse cake I’ll bring over here. Or are you still upset about our last game of chess? We can have a rematch if you want.”

It was a good thing Sue had come back with the refreshments or the two of them would be stuck in awkward silence because Reed didn’t respond apart from a deep sigh.

“I’ll hold you to that promise about the mousse, Tony.” She said as she set the tray with their drinks on the table then passed a glass of iced tea to the two of them. Sue took a seat beside Reed and laid a hand on his shoulder.

After another deep sigh, Reed finally decided to speak, “Tony, you know about how our team travels into other universes right?”

The question made Tony blink, “Of course. I help you sometimes with repairs for the Bridge.”

At first, Tony thought it was extremely bananas that Reed Richards had created a machine in his lab so he could travel to and observe alternate and parallel universes. Hell, Tony had second thoughts that Reed could really pull it off without some sort magical assistance. Not that he dismissed the idea of other universes, after all Strange had the ability to travel through time and other dimensions. Who was to say alternate universes couldn’t exist if there was someone who could travel through dimensions just fine? Then again, if there was a bet about this insane feat, he’d put all of his money on Reed. Who else would be able to create something like that but the smartest man on Earth?

“Do you also remember the time I told you about a female you in one of the universes we went to? The one with almost the same events but with a timeline a few years ahead of ours?”

Tony had to smile, that conversation always did amuse him. Especially when Sue recalled how Natasha—he would forever be salty about the fact that his female self was namesakes with Quadruple Cross—had mercilessly shut her younger brother, Johnny, down. The Human Torch had taken to sulking and was not able to even look Tony in the eye for several days, it was kind of funny. “Yeah? And how is she doing?” he asked genially. From Reed’s accounts his female self was quite something and was possibly his favorite alternate version of Tony. Ben had joked that it was maybe because she was hot—Tony saw the pictures from Johnny and he was damn proud that his female self was scorching like the Sun—much to Reed’s embarrassment.

His inquiry was met by a solemn face from Reed and an uncomfortable twist of lips from Sue.

“She’s dead.” Reed replied, making Sue turn away. “She died a few days ago.”

The answer rang like a gunshot in the quiet living room. “_What_? How did that happen?” He was ready to recite all the reasons he could think of when Sue decided to take the wind out his sails.

“Incursion.” She answered this time, grief for a woman she had considered a friend laced in her tone, “An incursion happened, when we were in their universe and they were not able to come up with a solution in time. We got there too late, barely managed to help and get out when the explosions started.”

“Incursion…?” Tony breathed shakily, “God.”

Reed had already told him of what he gathered from the other Reed Richards he met in his travels. He had been informed of the event that caused the early destruction of an entire universe, creating a contraction in the timeline of the Multiverse…shortening the existence of the remaining universes as well.

Taking Sue’s hand in his, Reed turned to Tony, “The heroes in the other Earth had decided to destroy hers to save theirs. It had eliminated her Earth but saved both universes.”

Tony felt horror fill him as he processed what they were telling him. Destroy one Earth to save both universes or let the Earths collide and either universe die. Both choices would drive anyone desperate or insane.

“Tell me, did you find out that an incursion is bound to happen in our universe?” Tony probed gravely. Reed said before that the universes that had already experienced an incursion, like her universe, were far away from their own. But to Tony, it was a cold comfort. They were just starting to get things back in working order after the Avengers’ Civil War and now this. Not to mention, there was also the matter of the possible return of the alien invaders.

They’re not equipped to face an incursion and another alien invasion at the same time.

Husband and wife looked alarmed at his question, though Reed seemingly regained some of his composure, “No…no, that’s not it. We asked you here for something else, though it had everything to do with her.”

Tony’s forehead creased at that, “I’m not sure I’m following, Reed.”

“During the incursion, we were in Nat’s lab trying to help her in coming up with a solution that didn’t require ending another planet. While working she had informed us of some things that happened over there. Like how she got captured by HYDRA over a year ago.”

He felt his hands curl around his glass, he set it back on the table lest he break it, “How?”

“They ambushed her on the way to a meeting in DC. She just recovered from injuries she got from a recent mission, she was still not clear to go back to active Avenger duty and she didn’t have the suit. Thus, she was overpowered by the men HYDRA sent after her.”

Tony rubbed both hands over his face, “Fucking HYDRA. How did she get out?”

“The Avengers found her two days after, Happy had apparently managed to send out a distress signal from his phone to Steve before his last breath.”

The air left Tony’s lungs wetly in relief for Natasha escaping and in pain upon realizing the bastards had killed Happy. He had wanted to fume so badly until he noticed Sue’s pale face. “Sue?”

Susan Richards looked like an impenetrable fortress with the look on her face, despite the pallor, “They got her out alive but they got there a little too late. Tony…”she said monotonously, staring at him dead in the eye, “What do you think is the worst form of torture that can be done to a woman?”

He felt every nerve in his body freeze.

Of course, that was also the moment Reed had decided to join the conversation again, “At the time they had her, HYDRA also managed to recapture the rogue Winter Soldier.” He said and looked at Tony pointedly.

No.

They couldn’t mean…

Tony was going to be sick.

He was about to tell the two of them such when burbling noises broke the silence. Tony turned to his right and noticed something near the corner. An object that he knew was never part of the Richards’ living room before.

A crib.

Through the slats of said crib, two pairs of eyes in slightly differing shades of blue stared at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN! DUN! DUN....!
> 
> Yes, we have the Fantastic Four in here now. The question is, am I really going to swan into the Multiverse? The answer is no. This is probably the only chapter that would discuss it. The main focus will still be MCU and preparations to defeat Le Purple Grape. Also, the intricacies of the Multiverse will kill me. T_T
> 
> Fun fact: While I was typing this, I'm trying to highlight the word **deflect** to find a synonym for it in the MS word thesaurus (I use 2010) but I was unaware that I had accidentally highlighted another word.I was confused when I saw that the thesaurus gave me the words ELEGANT, EXPENSIVE, STYLISH, POSH and WELL-HEELED for the synonyms. I checked the word I highlighted and just about died when I saw that it was apparently **TONY**. Also the term Coercive Control was apparently coined by Dr. Evan STARK. 
> 
> Thank you for stopping by. Stay safe and God bless.


	9. Who says life is fair, where is that written?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It sounded like an episode of a reality TV series that would come out if Jersey Shore and Real Housewives had a baby and was bottle fed with cough syrup instead of formula milk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a reeeeaaaallllyyy long chapter that only had conversations.
> 
> **WARNING: VERY SENSITIVE TOPIC UP AHEAD. Also Pseudo-Science.**
> 
> All mistakes are mine. I have no beta.

“Tony…”

Tony’s head swiveled to face Sue, whose pretty face was crumpled by guilt, “I’m sorry. I know this scares you, it scared me too when she told us. Just thinking about how HYDRA wanted to hurt her is enough to give me nightmares. But, I assure you, nothing happened.”

He could only stare at her mutely in confusion, his thoughts were still trying to cobble themselves back into coherence.

If there ever truly was a higher power who said reincarnation was a thing, Tony had a hundred percent chance that he had done something to offend them in one of his past lives. They must have thought throwing the Winter Soldier into his life to fuck shit up was a good way to teach him a lesson. It was one thing to be in a universe where Barnes was forced to kill his parents, but to find out that in an alternate universe, the man was made to—

“What do you mean _nothing_ happened?” he asked, his eyes going back to that area to his right. He didn’t know if he wanted to laugh or cry when the pair seemed to enjoy his attention because their babbling was accompanied by cooing to his direction. Like a train wreck, he wanted with all the billions of atoms in his body to just turn away but he couldn’t. His eyes were still trying to convince him that they were not working properly.

Her eyes flicked to the crib where the outcomes of the horrifying possibility were still babbling away to each other, “Well, something did…” she added awkwardly, “Just not in the way HYDRA intended it to happen.”

“He didn’t hurt her.” Reed added, looking like he wanted to run back to his own lab and forget the entire conversation. For all of Reed’s academic prowess, he was a bit lacking in the social area and needed some help when engaging in less logical (read: emotional) discussions. Not that Tony never needed help in that area himself, he was only a smidge higher than Reed in the totem pole of emotional competence.

Nothing to write home about.

“He didn’t hurt her.” He repeated slowly with his eyes still glued to the burbling pair, enunciating every syllable just in case he had heard his friend wrong, “Then care to explain how what I’m staring at came to be?”

Tony knew it was wrong to refer to the children that way, he ought to be punched in the face for being an ass. However, his mind was being its stubborn self and was working overtime to convince him that he was dreaming or hallucinating.

Reed and Sue looked at each other, communicating silently before Reed nodded for his wife to go on with explaining things to Tony.

“As we’ve said before, events happened in that universe almost the same as it did here in ours. Rogers and the Widow bringing down HYDRA, Rogers jogging enough of the Winter Soldier’s memories to break the latter’s conditioning. One of the differences is that Natasha Stark offered to help Barnes after SHIELD went down. Searching for him as well to make sure that any members of HYDRA that escaped won’t get to him first and also to help her then-fiancé, Rogers—“

“I-I’m sorry, her then-_what_ now?” Tony choked, the surprise was enough to disrupt whatever trance the babies had him in, that he was sure he had shamed Emily Rose with how fast he had twisted his neck to look at the blonde.

Surely he had heard wrong this time.

A version of himself and a version of Rogers were _engaged_?

Oh goodie, it was almost as if the pissed off higher power had this incessant need to give him more reasons to go into a coma. Fabulous.

“In her universe, it wasn’t SHIELD who found Captain America, but the Avengers. Rogers stayed with her at the mansion, along with the team and Natasha was publicly known as the Avengers’ benefactor.” Reed answered, after a sip of his drink.

Sue picked up the rest, “Natasha started dating him a few months after the public found out that she was Iron Woman. After your battle with Stane, you revealed you’re Iron Man during a press con. Nat, on the other hand, had continued with the bodyguard cover but during one of their missions, an enemy bot got the jump on her. It ripped the armor’s faceplate off, revealing Iron Woman’s true identity. Anyway, she was dating Rogers and helped look for Barnes, she did find him and brought him back to the mansion. She immediately started to work on removing his triggers. Weeks into that, Barnes had confessed to her about killing her parents and begged forgiveness.”

Something in Tony withered at hearing the last part.

Barnes had _willingly_ confessed and begged for forgiveness. The man came forward the moment he had the chance to tell the truth.

Unlike a certain someone, he thought unkindly.

It also made him remember something back in Siberia.

_He was crying. He had tears in his eyes when I faced him…_

Tony pushed the memory away, it didn’t have any room in the conversation, “I’m guessing she didn’t know that too?” he offered, knowing the answer already and that the other two would get what he meant.

Reed shook his head, “No, but she had confronted Rogers about it. Natasha said that Rogers had admitted that he tried to talk Barnes out of telling her since he wasn’t fully healed yet. Rogers said he feared she’d take out what HYDRA did to her parents on Barnes.”

A part of Tony wanted to rage and another wanted to let out a bemused snort. Apparently, even being his lover wouldn’t make Rogers have an ounce of trust in Tony Stark.

Maybe it was a multiversal law or something?

Steve Rogers, thou shalt not find it in thyself to trust Tony Stark, even in any form the latter might be in or some bullshit like that.

“She let Barnes stay.” Reed continued almost thoughtfully, “Natasha told him that it would take a while before she would be able to forgive him completely, but they can have Barnes’ confession as a start. She said that there wasn’t anything she can do for her parents back then, she can’t bring them back, but she can do something to stop HYDRA from using Barnes again as a tool to push their disgusting ideologies into the world.”

Tony couldn’t help but feel like Reed was trying to tell him something. He had a hunch as to what, but he didn’t want to go there. If Reed wanted to tell him, he would.

“Barnes did leave though. When everyone found out that Natasha broke things off with Rogers after she confronted him. He left in the middle of the night, leaving a letter under her bedroom door. Barnes wrote that he felt bad for being the reason why things with Rogers fell apart and that people were calling her awful names all over the news because of it. He figured it was best for everyone if he just left, believing that Natasha and Rogers would be able to patch things up if he wasn’t there.”

Brooklyn boys and their letters, Tony thought with a mental eye roll and took a gulp of his drink. Those two should be banned from writing them.

He also found it curious that people would be calling Natasha names for breaking up with Rogers. Sure, there would be some backlash and questions, since it was America’s greatest soldier and Golden boy who got dumped but the public vitriol was ridiculous.

Unless…

“Don’t tell me…” he trailed in bemusement. Oh, if it was what he thought it was, he kind of wish alternate Barnes was still alive so he could repulsor him in the face.

“Natasha Stark, who was then engaged to Captain America, was desperately trying to help the Winter Soldier and clear his name. When he began staying at the mansion, rumors of arguments and troubles between the lovers started to come out. Some jerk in the internet pointed that out and people began talking about an affair.” Sue finished with a derisive snort.

Great.

Helping someone out turned his alternate self into a Jezebel in the eyes of the public all because Captain America was being a douche. He’d bet that nobody had mentioned anything about Rogers keeping the truth about his alternate self’s parents.

Then, there was Barnes. The moron left without even considering the consequences. That decision of his obviously added fuel to the fire because nothing screamed guilty in the eyes of an accusing public more than hiding or running away. What was it with the Brooklyn boys and (erroneous) martyrdom?

“An affair _did_ happen but not between Natasha and Barnes.” Reed chimed in, “That was part of the reason she had decided to end things with Rogers.”

Tony’s eyebrows shot to the ceiling in disbelief, “Rogers had an _affair_? He cheated on her? Am I hearing this right? This is Steve ‘I loved Peggy Carter then and now’ Rogers we’re talking about.”

Okay, Tony knew the guy was a lying, entitled bastard—and thanks to Romanoff, a nutcase—but he never thought of him as the type to cheat on a lover. For goodness’ sake, the guy visited Peggy Carter religiously back when she was still alive even though she couldn’t remember their conversations most of the time.

“Rogers would have gotten away with it if not for the Falcon.” Sue said after setting her own glass down, “Things cooled off between the two of them after Natasha talked to Rogers about what happened to her parents. The rest of the Avengers were not privy to the details of their conversation but took note of how distant Natasha was with her fiancé despite his efforts to apologize. Wilson thought it was about Rogers sleeping with Sharon Carter during the time the two posed as a couple for an undercover mission, which happened before his relationship with Natasha became known to the public.”

She pulled her ponytail tighter and continued, “Apparently, Rogers had told Wilson of his indiscretion, seeking help. The thing is, Rogers didn’t say anything to her at all, despite Wilson’s advice. He was afraid she would break up with him. So, Wilson was under the impression that Natasha was in a snit because Rogers had finally told her about it. He talked to Natasha and tried to help Rogers’ case by emphasizing that Rogers swore up and down that the affair was nothing more than a one-night stand. Even better, he said that Rogers admitted that Agent 13 reminded him of her aunt so much that it was hard to resist. Natasha said she had great respect for Wilson’s ability to repeat that to her with a straight face. She knew he didn’t buy Rogers’ excuse either but was too loyal a friend to say so.”

Reed pinched the bridge of his nose at end of Sue’s explanation. Tony kinda wanted to do the same. Leave it to Rogers confuse even a genius of Reed’s caliber with his twisted logic.

He couldn’t say anything at all. Tony just blinked, baffled by the turn of events. It sounded like an episode of a reality TV series that would come out if Jersey Shore and Real Housewives had a baby and was bottle fed with cough syrup instead of formula milk. Also, what the hell was that ‘it was only one night’ bullshit? The fucker still slept someone else while in a committed relationship! So what if the woman reminded him of her aunt?

Tony shuddered when he recalled his conversation with Romanoff earlier about Rogers looking for substitutes to the people he loved. _Christ_.

“That didn’t help. Not that it would have in any way, because Natasha knew that specific mission had taken almost _two_ _weeks_ to wrap up. That’s ten nights too many for a one-night stand.” Reed concluded, his own disbelief coloring his tone. “_Maybe_ it did happen in just one of those nights, we could give him that. But no matter where you look at it, he still cheated on his partner.”

Tony huffed, “The audacity. What in the actual fu—“

* * *

A cough and a high-pitched squeak put a halt in their discussion and Sue shot up from her seat to check on the babies. She picked one of them up—a girl, Tony thought, noticing the pale yellow onesie with kittens printed all over—and brought the baby over to them. He noted that Sue had contemplated giving the baby to him at first, though she must have noticed his hesitation and handed the child to Reed instead before saying was she going to get something.

Reed was gingerly cradling the girl, talking to her in hushed tones. Tony estimated her to be more or less ten months old, as his friend was shushing her when the little coughs continued. He winced every time her small face scrunched up irritably, her pink tongue seemed to be trying to push something out of her mouth.

Tony also wanted to grab her from Reed make sure nothing’s wrong and the thought as to why scared him a bit more than he wanted to admit. Thus, he stayed glued to his seat, staring at her like an imbecile and silently wishing whatever was bothering her to go away.

Sue came back after a while with the twin—a boy, yawning and kicking in his dark blue onsie—then moved closer to Reed and the girl, “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” she cooed at the girl. She had also grabbed some damp cloth and covered her finger with it. Sue then slowly pushed her clothed finger into the girl’s mouth to find what she had in it that was making her uncomfortable. The boy in her arms was a quiet observer, eyes darting around before settling on Tony with rather intense focus for such a young one.

He stared back, for lack of anything else to do and unconsciously held his breath when it became clear to him how much the boy resembled Barnes. It was the same blue gray eyes, nose and jawline. The child may as well be a clone of the man. Tony’s eyes then flickered to the girl and noticed that, like her brother, she may favor their _father_ with her pale skin and brown hair, but Natasha had definitely left more of herself in her—in the shape of her face, in the blue of her doe eyes, her long lashes and lips.

“Ah, there it is.” Sue said triumphantly when a thin strand of what’s most likely fiber from a fabric stuck to the cloth and the girl’s fussing slowed down to a stop. “Johnny forgot to remove that tasseled blanket he used from the crib. She was mouthing on it.” She put the cloth beside her on the sofa and bounced the boy on her lap for a better hold on him when he started squirming. Reed’s attention that was mostly with the baby girl, was drawn back to the others.

“I guess, he did.” Reed concurred, turning to Tony, “Sorry about this, if you want we can put them back in the crib—“

“It’s fine.” Tony interrupted and he mentally grimaced.

He actually meant to let Reed do as he suggested. He felt that continuing the conversation with the children near was…_weird_, considering the nature of it. But, he couldn’t take it back now, and guessing that at one point, the couple would make him hold the children, he decided to beat them to it by gesturing to Sue to pass the boy over to him.

“Are you sure?”

That bit of surprise that clung to Sue’s features would have made him sad in any other instance but he supposed her reasons were valid. He was barely coping up with the deluge of new curveballs being thrown his way at the moment. Hell, any other person would probably be in hysterics if placed in the same situation. Tony only had the advantage of having some first-hand experience dealing with things most people would think were impossible and that kept him grounded.

_Somehow_.

Things seldom caught him off guard anymore because of how much of a rollercoaster his life had been but the day was a different one. Surprises after surprises after surprises that wore him down. For those who knew him, that would mean he’d end up doing some stupid. Be that as it may, let it be said that he was not planning to nor would he ever do anything to harm a child.

“Yeah.” Truthfully, he was surprised with himself too. The fact that shock or some iteration of it was still thrumming through his system might be a contributing factor though.

He made sure to flatten his jacket’s collar first before lifting the baby on his shoulder and supporting the baby’s weight with an arm underneath his bottom. Surprisingly, the baby didn’t cry or scream bloody murder when Tony held him. After some twisting and wriggling, even accidentally smacking Tony’s face with his elbow at one point, the baby used his tiny fists to grab hold on to the hair at the back of Tony’s neck then proceeded to gnaw on the junction where the billionaire’s neck and shoulder met.

“Oof. Hell of a grip there, buddy.” Tony flinched when the boy yanked at the hair on his nape some more then bounced the baby higher on his shoulder. The boy was a little strong for his age that Tony couldn’t help but wonder if the serum was passed on. “Careful with the teeth too, champ. Ouch, yep, I felt a bit of teeth there…”

“Jamie.” Sue supplied helpfully, “Also known as James Anthony Stark-Barnes. She named him after Barnes and you. Born on the 10th of March…five years from now. He’s three minutes older than his sister.”

Ah, so they’re nine months old.

Tony held his tongue for a moment, feeling somewhat off-kilter but thankful that he didn’t drop the kid. He did like the name, it was something he had considered when he had that conversation with his friends, especially Honeybear. It was just that he always had a _different_ James in mind for a namesake when he thought about a future son. Rhodey would flip when he finds out about this.

He silently mouthed the nickname with a nod before looking at Reed who was still entertaining the now giggling girl by shifting one of his hands into different animal shapes. Tony tried to get the kid, Jamie, to lie down instead when the child got too generous with using his teeth, to no avail. The boy’s grip on his hair would tighten and he would chomp down harder if he so much as felt Tony shift. Accepting defeat, Tony rubbed a hand over the boy’s back for a few minutes. The kid was yawning earlier, he’d probably fall asleep soon. Jamie seemed content to let the adults talk as long as he could gum Tony’s neck and shoulder in peace.

_Good to know that I make an excellent teething material._

“And she is?” Tony asked, nodding over to the girl.

“Alaina Marchelline Stark-Barnes. Natasha called her Ellie.”

“Ellie.” He repeated, savoring the name. Of course, a female version of himself calling her daughter ‘precious dedication to Mars/Ares’ or ‘a harmonious warrior’, then giving said daughter a nickname that meant ‘noble’ should not be surprising. Then again, it’s not like he had any room to talk, his very own name meant ‘priceless, wealthy guard’. _Thanks, Howard_.

Jamie and Ellie.

Ellie and Jamie.

At least the nicknames sounded cute.

The girl, Ellie, turned to him as if hearing him say her name was something she was waiting for and began babbling at him. Jamie was quiet, Tony also noticed that his grip had slackened and he was nodding off. The boy was valiantly fighting to keep his eyelids open. Carefully arranging Jamie to lie comfortably in his arms, he met Ellie’s gaze head on. She seemed to be curious about the strange man who was holding her twin. He rocked Jamie until he succumbed to sleep before Sue offered to put him back in the crib. 

Like clockwork, as soon as Sue lifted Jamie from his arms, her husband gave Ellie over to him. Jamie was more subdued while Ellie seemed to find Tony quite funny. She was also a wriggly little thing but she was letting out giggles while kicking the air as Tony helped her stand on his lap. Her hands patting—_slamming_—his face, her little fingers pinching—_digging into_—his cheeks. He played the hurt off by making goofy faces, making her shriek some more. Damn, he was getting convinced that the serum was passed on. He’d have to look into some of Howard’s old research about the serum for that. “Take it easy on the moneymaker, darling. Pepper’s gonna kill me if I show up to a meeting with my face covered in bruises.”

Ellie only babbled in response like she understood what he said and Tony had to smile. He arranged her to sit on his lap and wrapped his hands around her torso so she wouldn’t fall. He chuckled when he felt her start gnawing on one of his hands, “I know I let your brother bite a chunk off my shoulder but my hands are not suitable for teething babies.” he said, slowly pulling his hand away from her mouth. She pouted and tried to grab said appendage back to chew on it again.

“Do you have those…uh, the thing for teething? I forgot what it was called. She’s trying to eat my hand.” Tony asked, battling the baby in a tug of war for his hand and she was winning. “They’re not hungry, are they?” he added, thinking about Jamie crunching into his shoulder earlier.

He looked at the couple when no one answered and they were smiling at him. Sue walked over to the crib and grabbed a yellow silicone fish with a hole in the middle.

“Don’t worry, they’ve just finished their milk before you came in.” She replied and handed the toy to Tony, whom in turn had given it to Ellie to chomp on.

After verifying that the baby had a firm hold on her fish, he asked the other two to continue.

* * *

“Barnes went into hiding for two years. The mission where Natasha got injured was in Madripoor. They got an intel that stolen Stark tech fused with those of the Chitauri was going to be sold in an auction there. She went along with Romanoff, Barton and Luke. They did finish the mission to locate and destroy the weapons then called SHIELD for cleanup. There were no casualties, thank goodness, but Natasha got hit by a modified EMP device. It’s based on the technopathy-inhibitor created by the Shi’ar. She was sure that the enemies would not be able to create something so advanced since their organization was more focused in smuggling and selling weapons to the black market. She theorized it was probably stolen from SHIELD, thus they let Hill handle the rest of the investigation. According to Natasha, it completely shut down the armor in a little more than a minute. She didn’t have time to activate emergency protocols to restart the armor after getting the EMP off because the enemy agents had detonated a bomb and the resulting blast launched her through the walls of a building.”

Reed explained and the look in his eyes told Tony that he was also interested in the EMP device. The engineer in him wanted to get his hands on something that effortlessly shut down Iron Woman’s armor. The fact that it was fused with advanced alien technology was also highly intriguing.

Tony hissed when he thought about the injuries Natasha got from the fight. Hitting a wall in the armor was already tough, resulting in bruises that covered most of the torso and took several days to heal. Getting cars from a parking lot rain over him while in the armor was no joke, and that was with a functioning one. But, to go through _walls_ with the armor shut down? That was an experience he wasn’t really looking forward to repeating himself. He had to stay in medical for weeks. His ribs hadn’t been forgiving during that time and taking a piss while having a bruised kidney was akin to torture.

“After that…the ambush.” He said, his hands holding on tighter to an oblivious Ellie happily chewing away on her fish.

Reed glanced at Sue, who took it as a sign that she would be the one to tell him about what happened next. Tony guessed it was probably because Natasha had entrusted the more delicate details to Sue.

“Yes. HYDRA wanted her to hand over the design plans for the arc reactor. They created a weapon, similar to the one that HYDRA from our universe created for Project Insight. They hit a snag on the project because they needed a stable energy source that could accommodate the weapon’s large energy input. And the arc reactor fits the bill perfectly.”

Tony looked to the side at the mention of Insight. Rogers threw that in his face too when he caught up to Tony during the intermission of an event that required both of their teams to attend. Saying he helped HYDRA create the helicarriers.

Which was totally unfair because one: Tony didn’t know HYDRA was hiding within SHIELD. Two: he didn’t create the damned things. SHIELD already have them long before Tony got entangled with them. He only gave SHIELD suggestions on how to stabilize the flight of the helicarriers by using repulsor tech because of that propeller fiasco during the Battle of New York. Three: he was just doing his job as a _SHIELD Consultant, _as Mr. Perfect Teeth liked to emphasize back then. Giving suggestions on how the agency can improve their tech was part of his contract. And lastly, four: who the fuck was the one that ran missions for the spy agency that was infested with Nazis again? Receiving orders from the higher ups and got chummy with their kill squad?

Because it sure as all fuck wasn’t the guy in the red and gold armor.

Tony took a deep breath, that was not going to help his blood pressure and Ellie was squirming. Probably sensing his mood, babies were sensitive to stuff like that. Or so what one of the nurses from Metro General told him during one of his late night visits. He adjusted his hold on her to make her lie down on the nook of his arm and patting her flank to soothe her. Luckily, she was feeling a bit sleepy and quieted fast enough. They all waited for her to fall asleep before Sue placed her in the crib beside her brother.

Tony waited for Sue to come back then fired his question when she had gotten back to her seat. “You said…Barnes didn’t hurt her.”

“Yes.” Sue confirmed, “That’s what Natasha told us. She was adamant in letting us know that. She didn’t even know that he was also there at first, until she heard familiar screams from outside the cell they were interrogating her in. She said their captors were getting frustrated with her lack of cooperation. One of the guards noticed her reaction when she heard Barnes and told the others about the rumor about the two of them having an affair years before that’s why she was no longer with Rogers.”

Reed shifted in his seat and wrapped his arm around his wife’s shoulders. Sue gave him a grateful smile, then turned back to Tony with her face grim and voice all steel, “It was all a game to them. Those sadistic bastards thought it was like hitting two birds with one stone. If the physical beating is not enough to make her do what they wanted, maybe the more scarring one would do the trick. A great insult to their arch nemesis too, when the man finds out. It was a small mercy that none of those men thought of setting a camera in the cell because they were too busy counting their chickens.”

A forced laugh made it out of her chest, “It could also be because they thought it would crush Rogers so much more hearing it from the two of them, after all it was possible to edit a person’s face in video nowadays. Rogers had no reason to believe whatever they would say or show him. Then again, they wouldn’t need a video anyway, if they just made sure she got pregnant—“A gasp escaped from Tony yet Sue soldiered on, “They injected her with an ovulation inducing drug they were experimenting with and subcutaneously implanted a device in her neck to monitor the hormonal activity in her body.”

Reed met Tony’s eyes with a morose look, “HYDRA also wanted to test the idea of breeding supersoldiers. That’s why they went out of their way to recapture Barnes. If they couldn’t get their hands on Rogers, Barnes was a good alternative. And much easier for them too, because they were already familiar with his physiology. They needed Natasha for the reactor, that’s true. However, why not let the project commence earlier than scheduled since they have a perfectly working womb on hand? They’ve probably used Barnes’ safety as leverage too to make sure she couldn’t fight back.”

“Yes, they did.” His wife agreed and giving Tony an apologetic look when she noticed how Tony’s hand had almost dug into the upholstery covering his chair. He gave her a quivering grin in exchange and a nod for her to continue.

“When they brought Barnes in, Natasha recalled that he had looked gaunt, despite the serum, he must have been beaten and starved for quite some time as they were re-conditioning him. There were bruises and healing cuts all over him and slightly disoriented from what they did. They crudely told Barnes that he only had an hour to accomplish his mission which was...”Sue stopped and looked away with a gulp, “…to fuck her. Whatever it takes. A few moments after they locked the door, Barnes advanced in on her—“

Tony flinched and closed his eyes, blocking the image away.

“—but he paused as he was about to hold her down when she told him that he didn’t have to hurt her to accomplish his mission.”

His eyes flew wide open when he heard that, “He didn’t have—she _let_ him?”

She nodded, one of her hands coming up to rub her arm, “Natasha told me that they left her alone for hours to break her down with the anxiety from thinking about what was going to happen. She vowed to herself that she would be damned if she let HYDRA win. They won’t break her using Barnes. She was going to save herself and him. There had to be a way for the two of them to stop those people and escape. But, as it turned out, HYDRA was not going to let that happen.”

The disdain in Reed’s voice was almost palpable as he commented, “So, HYDRA used her kindness against her. They knew she would never let anyone get hurt on her account.”

Sue leaned closer to her husband, “Exactly. It may have been luck or something else, but Natasha had gotten through to the Soldier somehow. Same as when the Barnes in our world had recognized Rogers in DC. He was terribly confused when she said he could have her. He even asked her why. Natasha told him that she knew he really didn’t want to hurt her and he didn’t tell her otherwise. He just kept listening to her talk. She guessed that some safety net had been created in his mind when she was working to get rid of his triggers before he left because he seemed more...present as she talked. The safety net must have enabled him to realize that she wasn’t a threat to him and that he knew her even if he couldn’t remember anything about her.”

“But he still obeyed the command.” Tony breathed. The whole thing was making his head spin. “He didn’t stop.” If the Soldier had listened to her, then he could have stopped. He _should’ve_ stopped.

Sue blinked the beginnings of tears in her eyes away, “He didn’t and she _never_ hold it against him. Because she knew what would await both of them if he didn’t obey. Natasha believed that the Winter Soldier—_Barnes_—was also aware of that. They would torture and wipe him over and over until they had successfully reduced him to the weapon they wanted him to be with no chance of his humanity ever coming back again. For her, it was either the Soldier or someone cruel who would definitely take pleasure in her pain. For HYDRA, it didn’t matter if it was Barnes or not. The whole thing was not just to produce super soldiers but, to beat her into submission in the worst possible way. The possibility of conceiving a super soldier was just a bonus. Worse, there was a chance that those evil men would pass her around like a piece of meat and _still_ kill Barnes because they don’t want to waste effort in brainwashing him anymore since it was no longer working.”

Reed’s hand tightened on his wife’s shoulder and Tony was relieved that he wasn’t holding Ellie anymore, otherwise, he might have dropped her in shock.

“Natasha…” Tony whispered, his face falling into his hands. He was terrified and he was just hearing a secondhand account of the events. He couldn’t even imagine what it was like for her who had actually lived it. The toll a situation like that would take on a person’s psyche was unimaginable.

Natasha had to make a tough decision amidst an impossible set of circumstances. Considering she was at a great disadvantage right from the beginning of her capture—she had no armor and had not yet fully recovered from multiple injuries she got from her mission.

All the possible outcomes of the other choices Natasha had were worse than the one from her only viable option. Add in that herself wasn’t the only person she had to save. Taking everything else she had at the moment into account, she went with what she could go with. No matter how small a victory or meager a shield it may have been for both of them.

Need for their survival had made her desperate.

Thus, she took a gamble and threw her Hail Mary.

“The handlers didn’t notice a loophole in their command and Natasha caught it. She had read the files and had an idea how the Winter Soldier programming worked. The Soldier’s priority is always the mission’s objective. If the situation called for it, the Soldier can circumnavigate some of the parameters provided that it didn’t compromise the goal. The Soldier only needed to have her, they didn’t specify that he had to hurt her to do so. They said whatever it takes for him to have her and having her without resorting to violence didn’t go against the objective.”

Tony felt like a bastard for feeling relieved that Barnes didn’t hurt her. In a twisted way, it was comforting to know he didn’t. He could feel his stomach turning when the thought of Barnes brutalizing her too. Still, that small comfort didn’t make the whole thing right.

“Natasha also said part of the reason was because they both needed…a kind touch. They were in an enemy base. He was back to being their puppet and she was there experiencing what it was like to have HYDRA acquire control over someone. She wanted that moment HYDRA tried to hurt them to be something they could both draw comfort from. To keep the horrors at bay even for a little while, since they couldn’t be sure about how long HYDRA would keep both of them for. She fully believed that she wasn’t the only one who thought so.” Sue added further, smiling sadly at Tony,

“It wasn’t an ideal situation for either of them or anyone for that matter, but they did what they could to keep the other safe and had a quiet understanding of how they would help each other. When the hour was up and the handlers came back, they asked him for a mission report and Barnes said he reached his objective. That was another thing in the programing that Natasha held on to, the Soldier didn’t have to provide specific details unless asked. She acted terrified of Barnes the whole time, staying curled on the floor and flinching every time Barnes moved. The handlers returned to her cell as soon as the other guards had taken Barnes out of the room and she played her part by answering their captors’ questions with half-truths and quietly drew them false plans for the arc reactor. They kept reminding her that Barnes was near, hanging his presence over her as a threat.”

Tony could hear the _not that it really_ _was_ that Sue left out,

“She also said that she nearly dropped the act because she wanted to bash their faces in when they started mocking Barnes about finally getting some and how surprised they were that he still knew how despite his brain being all scrambled. And her too, for not being able to fight Barnes off. So much for the Invincible Iron Woman.”

Sue was obviously quoting the bastards on the Iron Woman dig. Tony huffed raggedly, “Sick sons of bitches.” His head felt like it was swollen and his heart ached as he pondered over everything Sue said.

“The Avengers found them the next day. Their captors were too busy figuring out her designs to focus on torturing both of them. Although they did send people to check on her to see if there were signs that they got their…bonus.” Reed finished, giving Tony a timid smile.

“She could have enlisted his help if he did listen to her.” He croaked, not wanting to think about what else would have happened if HYDRA focused on her and Barnes more, “_That_...didn’t have to happen.”

“I asked her the same thing.” Sue allowed, a wan smile gracing her face, “She said that it was the collar they placed on Barnes that made it impossible, apart from the device they implanted in her. If she had anything she could use to remove it, they would have had a chance.”

“A collar?”

“The collar was the checkmate. As Reed said, HYDRA used Barnes’ safety as leverage. It’s like the collar Ross placed on Maximoff at The Raft. Those collars produce electric shocks enough incapacitate and ensure that the wearer would be docile. In Barnes’ case though, it was rigged to kill him if he went against orders. The collar they had on him was connected to his neural implants through the arm and remote-controlled. Natasha said they gave Barnes a few volts, enough to hurt but not to make him pass out. Just to demonstrate how it would easily kill him if they used it to full capacity.”

Shards of glass embedded themselves into Tony’s spine. He had seen some of the footage HYDRA had for documentation when they were using the chair on Barnes. A _few_ volts for those psychos meant several hundreds to anyone else.

He had witnessed a lot of brutality that a person could experience in captivity. He had been subjected to some of them like back in Afghanistan and with the Mandarin. HYDRA using that damn chair on Barnes had been one of the most horrific. After he had seen those clips, the screams that tore Barnes’ throat raw would echo in Tony’s nightmares some nights. This collar that Sue spoke of? If it was connected to the other Barnes’ neural implants, then it would hurt much, _much _worse than the chair. Tony couldn’t even begin to imagine the immense pain that Barnes surely felt during that little display.

For fuck’s sake, it would fry his brain and spinal cord to a crisp like goddamn beef jerky if used at full power. And in the off chance that he survived and the serum still worked to fix the damage, Tony would bet that Barnes would end up a drooling, bag of skin. The recovery would take an eternity because the serum would have to correct very extensive damage. There was also no clear guarantee that he would heal properly, thus Barnes would possibly live the rest of his life in a vegetative state. Maybe he wouldn’t because HYDRA would dispose of him since he was no longer usable.

The chair was horrific, but this fucking collar was utterly _barbaric_.

And they used it as the key to exploit both Natasha and Barnes.

Which one would be the right path to choose?

She fight to save her pride and throw away his life? He fight for his autonomy and she would be meat for the vultures to feast on? Or they fight their way out together and die one after the other?

Tony knew he would have no problem dying to save another person and he could safely say that Natasha wouldn’t have either. She would accept dying if it ensured Barnes would live.

HYDRA was also well aware of that, apparently and had no qualms in using it for their own amusement.

Just when he thought those Nazi shits couldn’t stoop any lower.

Tony rubbed a hand on his chest, suddenly remembering something. “Don’t you think the collar also had something to do with it? I mean, the electric shocks to his brain must have rattled something in his head that’s why he was more lucid when she talked to him.”

Both husband and wife ruminated on what he said for a moment before Reed answered, “That’s possible if we thought about the times we heard reports of those who had been mind-controlled or hypnotized got loose through cognitive recalibration or something similar. I do recall that you said Hawkeye once mentioned that he stopped Maximoff by electrocuting her with one of his arrows.”

“What happened was something we wouldn’t be able to fully explain to you.” Sue said with a thoughtful look on her face, “As mentioned, it was something that they had between the two of them. One that only the two of them would be able to understand completely. They both knew it wasn’t something they would wish on anyone else nor was it something they had really wanted for themselves. However, I think they don’t regret that it was the two of them either given what the alternatives had been.”

That, Tony could respect. The entire thing was an issue that only those who have been there could truly comprehend. It was just how it was. The part about Natasha and Barnes not regretting that it had been them wasn’t Sue romanticizing it. Not by a long shot. None of it was meant to be romantic. They were two people trapped in a very complicated situation and did whatever they could to get through it together, that’s what Sue was saying. People could have multiple interpretations of it all and put their two cents in but it wouldn’t be a truly complete picture—despite one party’s account of the events—without Natasha’s or the other Barnes’ actual thoughts on the matter.

“The children…?” Tony enquired, Barnes must have known. Natasha would have told him, she gave them his name after all. 

“Everyone knew about them. She never tried to hide them even when news broke out that she was pregnant and Barnes was the father. That rumor from before worked in their favor and the public just thought it was an eventuality that came to pass.” Sue replied, nodding when she guessed what Tony was trying to ask.

“The Avengers also brought Barnes back to the mansion with them after they got him and Natasha out that HYDRA base to resume his treatment. If he had blamed himself for what happened before, it was worse this time around as he went through his recovery. He hated himself and asked Natasha to put a bullet through his head, he even handed her a gun. She refused and told that him it wasn’t his fault. That he didn’t force her into it. HYDRA was the one at fault, not him. They toyed with the both of them.”

Tony was surprised when Sue suddenly snickered, fondness in shining in her eyes, “Natasha ripped him a new one too, when she caught him trying to run again. She told him she was pregnant a month after. She used two suits to drag him back to the mansion, one for her and the other controlled by JARVIS. She was yelling at him the whole time that it wasn’t going to work because she was quote unquote getting wise to his shit. She also added that if he was scared about the baby, she would not go for abortion because the baby was innocent but Barnes was free to leave after he had his head cleared of triggers if he really wanted to.”

“I believe her exact words were: _You can leave after we got rid of all that shit HYDRA put in your head, if that’s what you want. Go see the world or whatever the hell you wanna do that will be right up the alley of that hobo chic you got going on. I’m keeping the baby, it’s innocent. I told you I’m pregnant as a courtesy, nothing more. Fuck, if I’ve known that you’d bitch and freak out, trust me, you will never find out. If you don’t want the child to know about you or to be in your life, that’s okay. I don’t exactly need your deadbroke ass for child support anyway_.” Reed deadpanned then a shot Tony an amused look.

“Reed, if you’re implying that I enjoy poor-shaming and guilt-tripping people, I’m going to punch you.” Tony retorted with a scowl, “Besides, she had every right to get angry. They did the horizontal mambo—okay, with extremely dubious consent to both sides, but still—and when he finds out that the stork paid them a visit, he’s going _do svidaniya_? If he wanted to take responsibility, being there for her and the baby would be a good start. Running away doesn’t solve shit.”

Sue snorted, trying to hide her face in her hands while her husband only shook his head, chuckling under his breath.

“What?!” Tony carped. He was still frazzled that the sudden lightness in the mood threw him off.

“She told him the exact same thing when they got back to the mansion and Barnes was trying to explain why he was running away again. He said he was so sure that she would never want to see him ever again nor keep his child because of how it all happened. Barnes also overheard her talking to someone about abortion over the phone moments after she told him. It’s not because he didn’t want to step up for a child he was responsible for. He didn’t hear the whole conversation, but Mrs. Arbogast was just reminding Natasha of things that could happen in the first trimester—like a miscarriage or an abortion if it turned out to be an ectopic pregnancy.” Sue smiled, biting the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing out loud, “It was a shame Natasha didn’t get to tell us how he reacted when they found out that they were having twins. Must have been something.”

Tony had finally given over to the urge to roll his eyes.

_The dumbass_.

He could’ve just asked her directly. Tony also ignored that sly voice in his mind that crooned about misunderstandings between him and a certain someone. _Not today, Satan._

Barnes sticking around was important not just for the babies to grow up with a father. The children were obviously going to be alluring to HYDRA or the other bad guys. The idea of having Iron Woman’s genius and the super soldier serum in not one but _two_ offspring would be impossible to ignore for those fascist twats. They would want to get the results of their nasty little _experiment_.

“He did stay, right?” he asked, “They needed to protect the kids from the bad guys since everyone knew about them. Even here in our universe, a lot of people are interested in the super soldier serum.”

The question pulled the couple back into business. Almost.

“Barnes joined the Avengers when he got cleared for duty. He was also a very hands-on Dad. Natasha said it was almost unfair how good he was with them.” The blonde replied with a light tone that reminded Tony of a sales pitch. “He came up with rotations on the team roster that allowed one of them to be with the children if the other was on a mission or on a business somewhere. He also made plans about where and to whom should the children be taken for safety in case something major happen that required them both.”

Tony countered that beatific smile on Sue Richards’ face with a dismal look. He could already see and hear the cogs in her head as they turned. If this glowing 10 out of 10 stellar review of the other Barnes’ supposedly top-notch child rearing skills was not enough to tip anyone off, he didn’t know what will.

“You called me here for the children, right? What am I going to do?” he queried, completely sidelining Sue’s misguided attempts at _shipping_ him with the Barnes in their world. Something may have developed between Natasha and the other Barnes as they took care of the children, judging by how Sue was acting, but it didn’t mean it would also happen to Tony and this universe’s Barnes.

_Sorry to burst your bubble, dear. Not happening._

Sue rolled her eyes with a huff then Reed spoke, “Well, since we are the ones that brought the children here, we are the ones with responsibility over them, as the protection program dictates. But to honor Natasha’s request before we left to escape the incursion...we put in a message to the committee that it would be transferred to both you and Barnes. They’re essentially your children after all. An email from the committee came in this morning. They have granted our request that we get to talk to the both of you first before they summon you and Barnes since we’re the ones who knew what really went on. To…soften the impact of the issue and give you time to think about it without the committee breathing down your necks. Another thing is that they wanted Child Protective Services on the case too.”

The air in Tony’s lungs whooshed out of his lungs in an exhale. He had an inkling that Natasha wanted him to raise the twins, thus Reed and Sue telling him about them. But to think that she also asked the same of Barnes? He was a hundred percent sure she had no idea about the Winter Solider in his universe, unless she wanted the children to be around a more familiar face since…you know, Tony’s not exactly their mother. Be that as it may, it would backfire if Barnes refused. Child Services would be all over the kids for sure because Tony’s lifestyle before Iron Man was not ideal for raising children. Nor was his current lifestyle, he was running around in a tin can fighting off monsters and terrorists. It was just danger left and right.

Speaking of the twins, “By the way, why are Jamie and Ellie comfortable with me? This is the first time we’ve met. I can’t say I know a lot but I do know babies don’t actually gel with strangers from the get go.”

Sue perked up at the question, “Oh, they know you. Before we escaped through the Bridge, Natasha gave them a mild sedative to make sure they won’t be too affected by the jump into another universe. When we got back here, they woke up and were inconsolable. They wouldn’t stop crying and were looking for their parents. Ben came up with the idea to show them Iron Man. We showed them some clips of you in and out of the suit. Something must have clicked in their minds when they saw the armor because they calmed down and watched intently. We’ve shown them some of your interviews ever since. They like hearing you talk. I think it’s because yours and Natasha’s speech patterns are the same.” Her eyes then turned pleading as she implored, “They need you, Tony.”

She may as well have smashed a sledgehammer on his chest. Tony shifted in his seat, “Of course. I’ll make sure they’re well-taken care of—“

“You’re not going to pass them off to a nanny nor set them up to be adopted by a good family, Tony.” Reed interjected sharply. “Natasha wanted you be their parent not their benefactor.”

He winced, of course Reed would see right through him, “I...I just…I don’t know Reed, with the way our lives are going do you think I could afford to have children in the mix? I would love to take care of them but it’s too dangerous.” Tony was a monumental fuckup in more ways than one, he knew that. He would screw things up and then Ellie and Jamie would get hurt. He didn’t want that to happen.

“Didn’t stop Luke Cage and Jess Jones, though.” His friend pointed out, “I remember attending Danielle Cage’s first birthday and you were there as well.” Damn, Reed didn’t have to say it flat out to call Tony out on his hypocrisy. He was just rolling his eyes at the alternate Barnes’ reaction to Natasha’s pregnancy and here he was, practically doing the same thing.

Sensing the opening her husband had created, Sue added, “If you’re truly afraid something will go wrong, Tony we can and will help you. You have friends you can count on.”

Tony averted his eyes, suddenly embarrassed, and belatedly realized that it only guaranteed the couple a checkmate when his gaze landed on the crib.

He was about to say what’s on his mind when they heard Johnny Storm’s voice from the living room's threshold.

“Uh, guys? Sorry to bother you, we have a visitor.”

All three of them turned to the where Johnny was and Tony wanted to yank his hair out when he saw who the fuck the supposed visitor was.

Bucky Barnes was right there, in his undying red Henley and goddamn dark skinny jeans, staring wide-eyed at him.

* * *

Natasha’s training had enabled her to walk through the doors of the Compound without being a mess of nerves. After she found Steve’s tracking device, she immediately returned it to where it was to avoid suspicion when Steve touched point with her. She decided to loiter around the city first for a while to clear her mind. She tried calling Soldat earlier in the day but he wasn’t answering.

It was almost dinner when she had returned to the Compound. Natasha also bought four boxes of pizza to adhere to Steve’s faux reminder. She needed to inform Soldat, they were in trouble. The tracking device proved Steve was starting to notice what the two of them were up to. Or what she was up to.

Natasha rounded the corner into the common room and placed the pizza on the center table.

“Natasha.”

Again, it was only her training that kept her from jumping like a cat on a bed of hot coals at the sound.

She turned around and schooled her face into a casual smile.

“Steve.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This, I think is the most emotionally draining chapter I've written so far in any of my fics.  
I tried my best with the "Fuck or Die" trope and made sure to be as careful with it as I can. So please be kind.  
I'm sorry too, if the baby names sounded tacky (my younger sister said they do). Y'know what? I take it back. I'm not sorry. They're awesome names and you little sis can shove it. 
> 
> Also...I need HEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPPPP! Is there anyone that can help me answer my questions about legal stuff? I'm not American thus, I don't know how the laws concerning harassment and child protection in the US work. I've tried to research but they're making my head spin.The next chapters will feature them and I don't have a clue how to go about them. I don't want to use the ones in my country, that would be weird and inappropriate. If there's anyone, please comment how I can be in touch with you. 
> 
> I don't have social media though. I live under a rock. Should I make a tumblr account? Most ao3 users seem to have one.
> 
> Thank you for reading. Stay safe and God bless.


	10. I’ll tell you the truth and it's up to you to live with it.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seeing Stark reminded him of the clusterfucks that happened lately and it was putting him on edge. It was all he could do not to slip a hand to the knife hidden in his boot because he felt that it would be, ironically, grounding to him at times like this. He felt like he was rattling inside his skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A long ass 10k chapter.
> 
> All mistakes are mine.
> 
> Buckle up....
> 
> Bucky with the Dad shock hosts a tea party on steroids.  
Tony is also getting wise to his Barnes' shit.  
Reed and Sue just wanted to help.  
The twins being angels.
> 
> Enjoy.

“Steve…Natalia.”

The other two occupants of the common room turned to face him in surprise.

“What’s up?” he asked, taking in the tension in the room.

“Soldat.” Natalia nodded, her fingers twitching minutely. “I just got back and I bought pizza for dinner. Steve asked me to before I left the Compound earlier. I think he was going to check if I got one with bacon and artichokes.” She seemed to notice his attention on her hands and she crossed her arms over her chest to hide them.

There it was again.

To the untrained eye, it would be unnoticeable. To the people who did have experience in combat, it would be an instinctive motion of wanting to reach for a weapon, readying herself for a fight. To the people who truly knew Natalia, however, it was a sign of her wavering. She was being hesitant and afraid. It was a tell, a bad habit.

The instructor he had been to Tasha wanted to sigh in annoyance. She was showing vulnerability and it would not do, that would lead her to fail missions and get her killed. He trained her to be the best and he’ll be damned if she didn’t live up to the legend attached to her name. James chucked the thought away at the back of his mind.

He had to focus more on Steve because the urge to beat the weakness out of Natalia was stronger than usual, considering how frantic his thoughts were running due to the bolt from the blue that landed on his lap earlier that day.

“Did you? That one’s pretty good.” he returned, eyes touching on the boxes on top of the center table, “And please, for God’s sake, tell me you didn’t buy one with pineapples, Natalia.”

“And listen to Clint whine about how we’re missing the contrasting sweetness pineapple creates with the savory toppings and how it cuts through the sharpness of the cheese?” she deadpanned. “No, thank you. I’d like to have a more quiet evening, Soldat. Preferably with my knife set still complete.”

James’ lips nearly quirked at that, he really wouldn’t oppose to her stabbing Barton. He’d be cheering her on, to be honest.

“Buck.” Steve breathed, his shoulders still bunched with barely hidden bellicosity. “You’re back. How long have you been there?” It would seem that the blond had just joined them, if his words were anything to go by or he was just ignoring the banter that occurred.

James’ eyes flitted between Steve and Natalia, noting the imperceptible and more genuine relaxing of her stance. “Just got in.” He replied, sauntering over to the center table and placing the buckets of chicken and soda he bought beside pizza. “Dammit, Stevie…you never told me that Popeyes is a chicken restaurant. I thought it was based on a cartoon sailor with a taste for greens. Hell, I looked like a twat when I asked the lady at the counter if they have anything besides canned spinach.”

That seemed to make the last bit of contentiousness from Steve evaporate, replacing it with an apologetic wince, “Gee, Buck…that must’ve been…”

“Damn right, it was.” James snapped, sitting on the couch and rummaging through the pizza, “You punk, sometimes I think you intentionally don’t tell me things you know about this century just so you can make fun of me.”

“What?” Steve squawked, moving to sit opposite him on the loveseat. “C’mon, man. You know that’s not true. You didn’t care much for Popeye the Sailor when we watched it with Clint and Scott…so it kind of just slipped my mind.”

“Whatever, Stevie. The damage’s already done.” He waved his metal hand dismissively before biting into a slice of pepperoni. “I get two slices of the artichoke pizza as compensation.”

Steve chuckled lightly as he too started digging into the fare brought by the assassins, “Fine. You could have just asked, jerk. Clint, Sam and Scott are playing Mario Kart. Wanda’s asleep already, the new training regimen is still new to her. Let’s just save some for them. ”

“Sure.” he acquiesced, gesturing to the redhead to sit beside him, “Aren’t you gonna eat, Natalia?”

Sensing that Steve’s ire was no longer present thanks to James, she moved to sit beside the brunet super soldier and took a slice of pepperoni too.

“How was that meeting with the Fanstastic Four, Buck? They still wanted us to loan them a sniper?”

James almost lost control of himself and stiffened at the question.

That was the reason the leader of the Fantastic Four had given in the email James had received earlier as to why they invited him to the Baxter Building. Barton was insulted that he wasn’t even considered but when James told them that Richards had specified that the ‘mission’ also required infiltration and tracking without any trace possible, the archer had no choice but to concede as it was clear who between him and James was better at those.

He forced himself to relax and hid it by burrowing deeper into the sofa. “It went okay…Dr. Richards, the husband...is just a little too much scientist for me.” He deflected, using the sentiment he echoed to Steve earlier that day that he had heard of Reed Richards being too technical in his explanations.

Steve gave him a wobbly smile in commiseration, “Didn’t go easy on ya, huh?”

“Not at all.” He said blankly in response and closed his eyes, leaning back on the sofa. As it became clear that James wouldn’t follow that up anymore, the blond’s attention went back to Natalia and asked,

“Did you get to meet with your contact, Nat?”

Natalia stopped mid-chew and stared at Steve. James couldn’t blame her. There was an undercurrent of slyness in the seemingly innocent question.

“I did.” She answered, recovering quickly enough not give anything away. “They said I don’t have to fly back to Russia to settle it. They already have people they could ask to move my parents for me. I would have to shell out some cash but it’ll be worth it.” She grinned sadly at Steve as she added, “They’re not going to be in unmarked graves with a little fence anymore.”

James briefly turned to Natalia. So, that was the excuse she gave Steve. He opened his eyes and looked at Steve mulling over her reply. The insincerity in Natalia’s tone was a tad hard to pin down and James was very impressed. The best lies were always the ones mixed with a bit of truth.

“It must have been hard for you to track them down.” Steve said empathically before continuing his questions, “Where did you find them?”

James nearly groaned in irritation. _This_ was why Steve never handled interrogation back in the day with the Howlies. The man was as subtle as a perverted old man in his birthday suit roaming around the campus of a Catholic all-girls school. Apparently, years of working closely with not one but _two _spies did nothing to improve his interrogation techniques. If it didn’t involve intimidation by using violence, Steve had no business in being inside an interrogation room.

“I met with them at a sandwich shop in Queens.” Natalia said blithely and dabbing her lips with tissue and taking a sip from the soda James passed over to her. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” James said, passing another can to Steve and taking the two slices of artichoke pizza he was promised.

“A sandwich shop?” Steve smiled genially though it didn’t reach his eyes, “Not in…say, a school?”

Ah.

It was _that_, huh. James thought with a snort. Steve was tracking her.

“School?” he interjected, making the other two shift their attention to him. “Speaking of schools, did you finally check the school I asked you to, Natalia?”

Luckily, Steve was too busy trying figure out what James meant that he didn’t see Natalia’s identical, albeit slighter, look of surprise melt into one of understanding in the blink of an eye.

“I did. I was putting it off for so long and you were getting antsy, Soldat. Since I was going in that area, may as well.”

“Good.” James nodded with approval. He glanced at Steve who was looking at them bamboozled that the two of them may as well be speaking in Russian.

“What?” Steve said, his brows furrowing as he looked at them, “Why would you ask Nat to check a school for you, Buck?”

James swallowed the last bite from one his artichoke pizzas and took a sip of his soda as he replied, “I’m a high school dropout, Stevie. I mean, let’s face it. Superheroing is not exactly what I dreamed I’d be doing in the future when we were kids.”

“Buck, I—“

“You have your art, Stevie. You were an artist for ads back then. I was a boxer before. I can still do that but, who the hell would think of putting a baseline human, even if it was a pro boxer, against a super soldier?” He explained with a tenebrous snigger. “I asked Natalia to check some schools out for me because I figured maybe…I, too, could have something going on for me other than fighting.”

James waited for a moment to let Steve think about what he said.

And viola,

Steve’s face crumpled with guilt as he looked at him, “I didn’t mean to…I wasn’t …Buck, I’m sorry.”

Hook, line and sinker.

“Nah.” James volleyed without a care, “It’s alright, Stevie. I know you didn’t mean anything by it. Besides, I should be thanking you, punk.”

That didn’t completely wipe the guilt from Steve’s face but it did make him look less like he was constipated. “Huh?” he let out dumbly, remarkably fuddled by the turn of the conversation.

“Steve,” Natalia ventured gently, taking the cue from James, “you remember that time we were talking about Wanda’s education back in Wakanda?”

Steve then lit up with an understanding, “Oh! Wait, did you tell Bucky about that, Nat?”

“Uh-huh. He was actually surprised that people are able to continue their education where they left off nowadays and asked me about what he can do about it. I have to talk to Wanda about that later too. I have some schools in mind that she might like.”

“Not that Natalia’s any help or anything.” James grumbled, rolling his eyes, “She just offered to help me look for schools with programs I could get into so I can get my high school diploma and then she said I’m on my own afterwards.”

“Be glad I did something for you at all, Soldat. I could have just let you be entirely on your own.” Natalia retorted with a grin, “Thank your lucky stars I have people I can call on for that.”

“Being an Avenger is not a good thing for her, Stevie.” James threw playfully at the blond, “She’s talking back to me now.”

Steve chuckled in response, “Sorry, Buck. She was already like that before we became a team. Blame Fury.”

He sighed dramatically, “I really should have checked and made sure that motherfucker was actually dead when I shot him in your apartment.”

Natalia snickered while Steve frowned, “Bucky…”

James raised his hands in mock surrender, “I know, I know.”

“That school in Queens, is it the same school Tony was in today by any chance?” Steve finally asked, changing the topic. James kept the smirk on his face a bit longer before settling on a confused frown. Dammit, Steve just wouldn’t let this thing go until he heard what he wanted to hear.

“Stark? He was there?” he queried and then glanced at Natalia who was concealing a frown.

Natalia sighed, “It is. I saw him there—“

“You did? How is he? Did you ask him if he received my message today?” Steve asked, perking like a Golden Retriever with a tennis ball and cutting her off.

“He seemed fine. He was there for some Science event sponsored by the September Foundation but I didn’t get to talk to him.”

The disappointment Steve was emitting was nearly tangible, “Oh?”

“Sorry, Steve.” Natalia offered with a slight smile, “Pepper and Rhodes were flanking him the entire time. You know how those two are with Tony. If I get within Tony’s spitting distance they’d cause a scene and they’d twist things around to get us in trouble with the Council.”

The blond smiled at them shakily and muttered, “Yeah, I know.”

They continued with the dinner after that, conversations about the team and the new training regimen sprinkled here and there. When James offered to watch a movie together after they cleaned up and stored the leftovers in the fridge, Steve only shook his head and said that he was going back down to the gym to train a bit more.

He bid James and Natalia good night with a nod and a hug, respectively. The latter action catching James’ eye and he filed it away for when Steve was already away.

They dimmed the lights in the common room before they moved in front of the flatscreen. They settled for some Turkish horror movie series and played it in high volume as another safeguard, in case Steve was still in the hallway.

“A mark?” James whispered in Turkish, barely moving his lips. He decided to talk in code too in case anyone who could understand the language happened to come by. Call him paranoid since the only one who possibly could was Barton and the archer was away with Sam and Scott.

Natalia had her eyes glued to the screen as well and whispered back in the same tongue, “Stumbled after dropping the present.”

“Taken back just now?”

“Burying tracks.”

“Ah.”

The two of them continued watching the movie in silence, James was vaguely disturbed by how realistic the makeup work was, before Natalia gave in and asked what he knew was hanging on her tongue.

“Soldat…”

“Hmm?” James hummed in response, hoping against all odds that she wasn’t going to ask what he knew she would.

“What happened in that meeting?”

James closed his eyes, thanking whatever deity was out there that Natalia was still speaking in Turkish and they set the movie series into autoplay.

* * *

To say that he was surprised when he received a message from Reed Richards of the Fantastic Four was an understatement.

He was at the gym, running on the treadmill when his phone chimed, a message popping up on the screen. At first he thought someone in the team was messing with him because there was absolutely no way Reed Richards would know his address let alone send him a message. James asked Barton and Lang first, the most likely candidates in his mind, telling them to stop dicking around—Barton because he’s an asshole most of the time and Lang because the man had the technical know-how to make a fake message look real with viruses attached. Sam would have made it on the list if not for the fact that he knew that James had a temper and would not hesitate to throw him across the gym to get his point across.

“What?” Lang sputtered, almost dropping the weight in his hand when James moved over to where he sat with a show of stealth that made the Winter Soldier the intelligence community’s ghost story for decades. “No way, man! I can do something like that but I don’t have a death wish! Playing a prank on the Winter Soldier _and_ Mister Fantastic? Nuh-uh. I like my limbs where they are.”

“C’mon Barnes…why would Scott do that?” Wilson chimed in while the witch was just watching it all with mild disinterest from seat on one of the benches. “Or Richards, for that matter?”

“Get over yourself, Barnes. Not everyone’s out to get you.” Barton snorted, stretching his arms, “Richards is a genius, the guy’s even said to be smarter than both Stark and Bruce Banner. He’d figure that shit out in no time. And Sam’s right, why would anyone try to mess with you using Richards’ name? Why don’t you give the included number a call? Must be some mission if he’s willing to outsource a sniper from another team. The Council has our contact info, Richards probably got it from them.” The hint of bitterness in Barton’s tone wasn’t hard to miss. Call James a bastard but he really couldn’t summon an ounce of pity.

As loathe as he was to admit it, James had to concede to the fact that Barton had a point. The man’s theory was supported by Steve and Natalia too, so he had no choice but to call the number to verify if it really was Richards who sent the message and also to ask what this other genius wanted from him.

After getting the confirmation that it was indeed Richards who sent the message, James set out to meet the man in his own building. _What the hell is it with geniuses and unreasonably tall buildings?_

James’ mind was running a mile a minute during the cab ride to the Baxter Building. He almost didn’t hear the driver when the man told him that they have arrived. He quickly paid and got out of the cab. James was greeted by the youngest member of the team, Johnny Storm, and was lead down a hallway to the living area. The younger Storm was quite chatty and James could only nod in response to his rapid fire attempts of entertaining him with stories from the Fantastic Four’s foray into different universes.

He couldn’t help but feel a gnawing wariness in the pit of his stomach as he thought about this meeting with the Fantastic Four. He supposed it was normal to have someone from another team join a group once in a while for a mission but this was too strange for him. He didn’t know Richards and his group well. Like the rest of the Avengers, he only saw them in some functions and meetings. A nod here, a greeting there and that was it.

Be that as it may, he knew about them enough to know that assassinations and infiltrations weren’t the kind of missions that the Fantastic Four were being sent to. That was more the Avengers’ alley. Maybe that’s why they asked for him, seeing as the New Avengers didn’t have anyone that well versed with infiltration. James knew that the Fantastic Four were often sent on missions that leaned towards the weirder side of the superhero spectrum—alternate universes, megalomaniac scientist slash wizards…that kind of shit.

Jesus, when he heard about what those four were facing every other week he felt like whatever the Avengers were doing was child’s play. Now, he had no idea what crazy ass mission the Fantastic Four was going to do but he may as well prepare himself for the worst if they were adamant in asking for help from another team. Not that he thought he’d be their saving grace or anything.

It was just better to brace himself for whatever mess he was going to walk into.

* * *

_I should’ve known._

James thought acrimoniously as he crossed the threshold into the living room after regaining his senses and stopped himself from staring any longer at Stark like some buffoon. He thanked Johnny for his help showing him the way before he sat on the chair, unfortunately, beside Stark’s. He steadfastly ignored the genius after throwing a nod his way. Not because Stark did something wrong but he knew that any more would not be well received.

He would not delude himself into thinking that this was going to end without Stark trying to rip his throat out or vice versa. With their track record, saying the chances that they would get out this building without some argument were abysmal was a gross understatement. Funny enough, he had a feeling this meeting would be more of a catastrophe in each and every way than the previous two instances he directly interacted with the billionaire.

_This meeting’s gonna be more pain than it is worth_, he sighed mentally.

Perchance, he was still smarting from the time Stark had ripped him a new one when he was just trying to be decent then left him at that construction site. Then, he got an earful from War Machine, who cornered him in the men’s room at the charity event after that fight with Steve, telling him to stay the hell away from Stark or he would rue the day he was born. James still couldn’t, for the life of him, figure out what caused the Colonel to fly off the handle like that.

For Pete’s sake, James put a lot of effort into leaving Stark alone after the billionaire pulverized his efforts to warn him about Steve with the heel of his pricey Italian shoes. Unless he had unknowingly breathed in Stark’s direction and the colonel found out. Whatever the reason was, it was utterly unnecessary. To be honest, it made him feel like he was a crazy stalker that was after Stark, which was not the case. He was just trying to help.

He grimaced at the thought.

Good God, who the hell did they think he was?

He wasn’t St—

James abruptly slammed the lid on that brainwave. He was already all kinds of antsy as of the moment and he didn’t need anything more to add up to that lest he lose it.

Seeing Stark reminded him of the clusterfucks that happened lately and it was putting him on edge. It was all he could do not to slip a hand to the knife hidden in his boot because he felt that it would be, ironically, grounding to him at times like this. He felt like he was rattling inside his skin.

His fretting was for naught however, because as he stole a glance at the smaller man, Stark wasn’t even looking his way. Clearly of the same mind that it was better to pretend the other didn’t exist. With that thought, James addressed their hosts.

“Thank you for having me.” He said blandly, pinning the couple in front of him with an almost belligerent stare. Any other day, he would have been repentant for acting like an ass but these two did trick him in order to get him in the same place as Stark.

He wasn’t an idiot. He knew that Iron Man would in no way join his old team on a mission all by himself. Any mission that would compel him to meet his old team in the field required the presence of the New Avengers—as requested by Colonel Rhodes, something the man slipped out during his rant in the men’s room. Some of Steve’s raging tirades about that also came into mind, along with the blond’s vicious longing to snap the colonel’s spine several more times with his bare hands.

Richards answered with a slight grimace, “Don’t mention it.” He’d probably guessed that James was now well aware that there was no mission at all.

“Mr. Barnes, we apologize for not telling you exactly why you’re here.” Richards’ wife, Susan, if he recalled correctly, said. Cutting to the chase and conveniently confirming James’ suspicions.

“James, please, Mrs. Richards.” He replied more amiably, recalling his manners, “I’m only sure about it being extremely important and that it also had something to do with…”because the damn bastard was just too hard to ignore, “…Stark.” He finished lamely, resigning to the fact that he’d have to engage Stark in one way or another while he was there.

Might as well get that out of the way.

“Call me Sue then James. Mrs. Richards is a little too formal.” Mrs. Richards—Sue—returned kindly, almost motherly in fact. Which was peculiar to him because he knew he had decades over all three of them. “Would you like something to drink?”

He shook his head no and thanked her again nonetheless.

“Okay.” She smiled then her eyes slid to Stark who was so still that one would think he had turned into stone, “As for why we invited you here…you’re correct, it has something to do with Tony.”

He took note of how Stark had almost jumped in his seat when they mentioned him and his thoughts fired like rounds from a machine gun.

_Could it be about Stark’s parents? Did it get out of the public? How? Is that the reason why the two of us are here? Did the Fantastic Four find something in another universe related to the Winter Soldier’s murder of Iron Man’s parents that could cause a major fallout in this universe?_

He didn’t realize he had spoken out loud until he heard Stark’s acerbic scoff beside him. “You’re surprisingly quick on the uptake this time around.”

“Tony…” Reed called in a gentle reproach.

“What?” Stark asked, his guileless face belied by the sarcastic tone, “I’m just saying that I’m surprised he had figured out some of it without any of us saying anything yet.”

James shot the man a glare. Not even two minutes in and Stark was already raring for a fight. He also didn’t miss the veiled allusion to the calamitous conversation they had at the construction site. “Why don’t you put a sock in it, Stark?” he snapped with a low growl, “I’m not here to listen to you moan and whine about how my presence pollutes the air you breathe.”

“What the hell did you say?” Stark replied with sharp exhale. The genius had the audacity to look so offended that James wanted to shake him until his teeth rattled so he’d stop his goddamn mind games.

“Would Your Highness like this lowly man to get him a can of air freshener as to not offend his sensitive nose?” James crooned with a slight sneer.

He surely hit a nerve because a second later, Stark’s countenance darkened with the most baleful glare he had probably seen on the man.

Stark’s vicious curse cut through the air then James was moving towards the genius to crowd the bastard in his seat. Reed and Sue immediately shot up to step in between them. Sue was holding Stark, who also stood up to move away from the super soldier, whilst her husband stepped in front of James.

So much for them pretending the other didn’t exist.

“What the hell’s your problem?!”

“_My_ problem?” James parroted incredulously. The frustrations with his current team, the heartbreak of seeing what could be a madman wearing his best friend’s face; the guilt and demons he kept bottled inside several of which either lead or connected to the man before him were all bleeding out of his frame. He was definitely feeling like the ticking time bomb most people saw him to be. All it took was a single spark from the genius to make him explode, “I should be the one asking you that! You’re the one bitching for no reason at all!”

“I’m just pointing out something I have observed! You’re acting like a fucking ass!” Stark nearly screeched, trying to move out of Sue’s hold.

“And you’re a hypocritical bitch!” he volleyed with equal venom.

“Stop it, both of you! Tony, stop it. Please.” Sue cried frantically, pushing Stark back and turned to James, “James, please calm down.”

“This is a disaster.” Reed muttered under his breath, his hands on James’ shoulders were ten times their size to hold the super soldier back. “I expected the unease not that they’d be this hostile to each other. They work together just fine in most realities.”

“Stop beating yourself up for not predicting this, Reed.” Sue said to her husband and swore vehemently under her breath when shrill cries began to fill in the room.

The sound startled James and Stark, their frames sagging as the urge to duke it out seeped out of their pores. The aggression within them had abruptly died a natural death as the howls of infant despair reached a crescendo. James winced as the cries acquired more volume, the noise hurting his sensitive ears. He turned to the corner and found a crib where the cries were coming from. His stomach dropped to his feet in a flash.

He didn’t realize that the Richards couple had kids and he was causing a scene. He was about to apologize to Reed when his eyes landed on Stark. The genius looked like he was about to be subjected to the guillotine. Awful as it was, it made him feel slightly better that he wasn’t the only one whose guts were hollowing itself for making the Richards children cry.

Sue quickly went over to check on the children, plucking one from the crib and shushing it while cradled in her arms. “Ellie, it’s okay, honey. We’re here.”

Her efforts were futile since the child was terribly upset, wailing for all the State of New York to hear. James winced with guilt as he looked at her red face, her eyes becoming puffier by the second. Richards moved away from James to get the other child, a boy, also crying albeit not as much as his sister. Still, the lungs on the boy were just as impressive and destructive to super soldier hearing.

While the couple was preoccupied with calming the children down, his gaze inevitably fell back to Stark who was rubbing both his arms as though he was debating whether to curl in on himself or something. When their eyes met, the genius abruptly straightened, arms falling back to his sides and resolutely avoided James’ eyes.

“I’m sorry.” James said to Reed, risking the ire of the children’s father. “I didn’t know you have kids—“

“They’re not ours.” Richards replied calmly, despite having a bawling baby near his ear. “We're watching over them for the parents.”

“Oh.” He uttered dumbly, “Still, I’m sorry. I swear I’m not here to cause a scene—“ whatever the hell he was going to say crumbled in his throat when he saw Richards deftly pass the boy to Stark. The shorter brunet had thrown James an unsure glance—quite suspicious—before accepting the baby, automatically moving into a dip and sway as the weight of the boy settled in his arms.

It was such a bizarre thing to James that he didn’t register the baby girl already calming down, her cries reduced to sobbing hiccups. Thoughts of the Spiderkid and the children with their broken toys at the charity event flashed in his mind and he realized that perhaps, Stark being good with children wasn’t so far off after all.

James’ eyes were torn away from Stark’s curiously efficient child-rearing skills by cooing noises being made to his general direction. Sue was holding the girl against her chest facing the rest of them. The baby was looking at him, making burbling noises and raising her arms up and down as if asking him to—

No.

He looked at Sue uncomfortably; surely, she wouldn’t give him the baby, would she? There was a look on her face that said that she might and James felt like bolting. The baby cried because of him, she would definitely cry again if he carried her. Besides, he didn’t actually want to chance having a baby screaming enough to raise all of Hell near his ears. He gambled a look at the girl, Ellie, he heard her name was, and felt something lodge in his throat the longer he took her sweet face in.

It was faint, quite unnoticeable unless one knew what to look for, but in certain angles she had a little resemblance to James’ sister, Becca. The brown of her soft downy hair was also the same shade as far as he could recall. He had seen the pictures of his family on the Internet and downloaded some of them into his phone. Some in their original black and white, some digitally altered to have color. He also found some childhood pictures which he thought was a bit disturbing, considering he barely remembered what happened to his family home after he left for the war. He had spent a lot of time looking at the pictures when he finally had room for himself to reminisce about the time before the ice.

James closed his eyes briefly to jam the stopper into the sudden surge of memories. He couldn’t afford to have a breakdown in front of Stark, the couple and the kids. He looked away from Sue and Ellie only to come face to face with a visage he knew very well. The splotchy complexion from all the crying did nothing to obscure it. If anything, that only highlighted every little detail that screamed the obvious to James.

He may as well have been looking into one of his own baby pictures.

James’ eyes flitted from the boy to Reed then to Sue and the girl. Stark had his back on him but the baby was facing James. The kid was determinedly gnawing at the column of the billionaire’s neck while the man was gently prying the boy away from the abused flesh.

“Jamie, buddy…seriously, I know you’re mad and I’m sorry we woke you up but you gotta stop with the teeth.” He heard Stark murmur against the boy’s temple when he had successfully dislodged the kid from his throat. The kid only blew raspberries in response, which made Stark groan at the spittle that landed on his face. If he were in a better space of mind, he would have found that amusing.

A girl that had a little of Becca in her, a boy that looked like him…

He had no idea for how long he had been staring. He vaguely heard Sue calling him and the ragged breathing he was beginning to recognize as his. He looked at the other three adults in the room and rasped with his chest heaving,

“What the hell is going on?”

* * *

Reed had called his brother-in-law to take the children first before urging everyone to move back into their seats. The Human Torch looked worried as he took the twins with him to some other part of the Baxter Building, leaving his sister, her husband and their visitors in a charged atmosphere.

When the children disappeared from sight, James simultaneously felt the boulder on his chest be lifted and pushed down harder against his rib cage for the shitty thought of being grateful that the kids weren’t in there anymore. He had deduced that the couple had told Stark everything there was to know before he had arrived as proven by the man not being surprised with the children.

James was almost certain that the children were hi—_related_ to him or to an alternate version of him, considering that they were in the care of the Fantastic Four. They must have been rescued from another reality.

Although, what bugged him the most was how _Tony Stark_ fit in all of this.

An absurd thought entered his mind and he ferociously squashed it. His connection to Stark was already chock-full of tangled complexities. Possibly had more landmines and booby traps than Area 51 could ever dream of.

They didn’t need any more to add to their collection.

“The…kids.” He initiated, “they’re the reason you called me here for. There’s no mission.” James felt like an idiot stating the obvious but he had to start somewhere.

Richards answered him with a somber nod, “Yes.” The leader of the Fantastic Four laced his fingers together, placing his elbows on top of his knees, “I’m guessing you have a few theories about who they are and where they came from?”

James nodded.

“Yeah.”

He could appreciate the fact that Richards was open to listening to what he had in mind, something he felt people nowadays forget to do—listening to what others had to say without jumping down their throats. He ought to add possible mind reader to Stark’s abilities because as soon as the thought finished forming in his head, he caught Stark staring at him with censure from his peripheral.

“They’re from an alternate reality…”

“That is correct.” The other genius supplied encouragingly.

“They’re _related_ to an alternate version of me.” He still couldn’t bring himself to say what he could tell was the right conclusion.

When he didn’t offer anything else, Sue gave him a small, sad grin. As if she too could tell what he was trying to avoid. “Close enough.”

Reed was in no mood to dawdle after he had heard what James had to say because the man cut straight to the heart of the matter, “The twins’ full names are James Anthony Stark-Barnes and Alaina Marchelline Stark-Barnes.”

The statement rang like a gunshot in the room and James felt all the air leave the confines of his body in a strangled exhale.

_Stark_-Barnes…

His head turned to look at Stark beside him. The smaller man had his eyes closed, possibly in defeat, praying to a god James knew he didn’t believe in to make all of this disappear or wishing he was anywhere but the Baxter Building at that very moment.

James’ head whipped back to the couple, “W-wha—how?”

Stark hissed and his eyes snapped open before he firmly pressed the knuckles of his left hand to his lips, his stare staying glued to the coffee table.

“In the alternate universes we usually visit, there’s one wherein most of the events that happened leading to their Civil War were similar to ours. One of the notable differences is that their version of Tony Stark was female and was known as Natasha Stark. She and her universe perished in an incursion that happened while we were there. She entrusted the children to us, hoping we’ll lead them to the two of you…and that you’ll give the kids a chance.”

The leader of the Fantastic Four was trying to soften the impact by talking in general. Too bad for him, it’s not working because Stark’s agitation was practically synonymous to a jumbotron flashing ‘No, you son of a bitch. Use what’s left of your fucking brain, do you really think we’d ever meet in the most vanilla way possible?’ writ in big, bold letters and his colors.

“Did I…did _he_…” his eyes flicked to Stark inconspicuously, “her family, I mean.”

Before Reed could answer, Stark jumped right in, “If you’re asking if HYDRA gave him the same mission they gave you, then yes.”

The man would have been believable in sounding as if he was over the phone ordering Chinese if it weren’t for the way his nails dug into his palm and his knuckles being near bone white.

“Tony—“

“He asked, Reed. What do you want me to do? Lie?” Stark snapped, his tone getting sharper with each sentence.

With a hand on her husband’s shoulder, Sue continued, “Natasha forgave him for that. When SHIELD in their universe fell, same as how it happened here, she took him in and helped in getting rid of his triggers. He left halfway through the treatment because of a misunderstanding. He went missing for a few years, then HYDRA captured Natasha and that’s how she found out that he was back in their control.”

“They managed to escape with the help of the Avengers and then nine months later, she gave birth to their twins.” Reed concluded. A grave would have been more cheerful than Richards as he talked and dread coiled in the pit of James’ stomach.

_HYDRA had the two of them…_

His jaw clenching, James said, “There’s something else you’re not telling me.” If his voice had gone colder than the Antarctic, no one pointed it out. 

He felt more than saw Stark shift in his seat, anxiety rolling off him in waves that it was making James even more on edge.

Then it hit him.

Sue almost incessant fidgeting in her seat, Reed’s rigid expression and Stark looking like he wanted to run and hide.

_The children._

Like cards falling down the floor, flashes of mission reports and images played in his head. Spotty images of torn clothes and the scent of blood, along with choked sobs, pleas and screams crashing down on him.

_When neither torture nor intimidation worked…_

He felt like gagging when the his senses were teased with the sharp sting of se—

His metal hand tightened on the chair’s armrest.

_No._

God, please.

He looked at Reed as the realization hit, “The twins…_how_?” he asked in the same tone.

“You _know_ how.”

There it was, the death knell.

James wearily dragged a hand over his face and letting it stay there.

HYDRA.

Fucking HYDRA.

Every time he had taken a step away from all the shit HYDRA jammed into his throat, they would pull him three steps back. The triggers may have been removed but he’d never be truly free from HYDRA.

_Cut off one head, two more shall appear…_

Who knew that goddamn mantra was going to be the story of his entire existence?

Cutting away a suppurating piece would not be enough to cure the infection that clung to his mind and soul. Instead, the wound would just expose the decay and spread it all over. Add insult to injury, some asshole out there decided that the one who wielded the knife _had_ to be Tony Stark.

James clamped down on the mordant laughter that bubbled in his throat.

God, his barely mended sanity felt like it was falling apart at the seams. He needed to get a grip, there was no need to make them see how much of an unstable fucker he was.

Oh_._

_Goddammit._

The laughter did escape from its confines when he noticed the twisted pun he made.

A loud, choked sound that was undeniably manic and possessed.

Frenzied.

_Deranged_.

A look of alarm that passed over the other three’s faces that made him laugh even more. Sue’s distress; the calculating wariness in Reed, as well as the slight change in his body language, preparing in case the need to subdue James arose; last but definitely not the least, he glanced at Stark in between guffaws and saw the genius’ a pale face, eyes nearly popping out of their sockets streaked with both fear and disgust. James could almost see Stark questioning his own genius because BARF evidently didn’t do its job as well as it should have.

He laughed again with hysterical tears streaming down his cheeks and until it felt like his innards had tangled up in a Gordion knot. Stark and the couple watching him helplessly.

It took a few minutes before his laughter subsided into snickers. It was by the skin of his teeth that James had stopped himself from ripping the hand that gently placed itself on his metal arm. He looked up and found Sue awkwardly leaning over the table.

She sat back down and resumed where Reed ended.

“James,” she said delicately, as if soothing a wild animal. Maybe that’s what it was for all he knew, “It’s not his fault. It’s not _your_ fault. The only one to blame is HYDRA.”

“It’s not my fault?” James repeated with perverse amusement, “You know, that’s a line I hear all the time. They say words lose their effect when repeated too often, maybe that’s why I find it hard to believe that anymore.”

“He didn’t hurt her. They did what they could to survive.” Reed added, moving a bit forward in his seat.

A cruel smirk painted itself on his lips, “He didn’t hurt her, huh. Are you sure about that? Because we have _proof_ he did.”

The three stiffened at the jab. Sue recovered quickly with her lips pressed in a firm line, perhaps to stop herself from slapping the life out of him.

“Don’t do this, James…It was a cruel situation, I agree. They either sleep together or he’s dead and she’s meat for HYDRA agents to feast on. Please, believe us. He didn’t hurt her.” Sue appealed, her hands moving to touch him again.

James shifted a little to move out of her reach. He felt scrubbed raw until all of his nerve endings were exposed, “I’m not going to do it.” He said, staring her in the eye, “The kids…set them up for adoption or whatever you need to do.”

“Barnes, don’t decide just yet—“

“I’m sorry, Dr. Richards…” James interjected harshly, fury rising to the surface, “isn’t that what you did the moment Natasha Stark had entrusted the children to you? You decided right away that they’re better off with me and Stark.” He didn’t wait for the genius’ answer, “You weren’t there when all the bullshit during the beginning of the Accords happened so you probably didn’t know.” He flopped a hand at the unnervingly quiet Stark beside him, _“I. murdered. his. parents. _I’m the fucking reason his team was torn apart and now you’re telling me that an alternate version of myself _raped _an alternate version of him? And that you want us to take care of the resulting children?”

Stark flinched as soon as he mentioned the death of his parents and again when James got to what happened to his alternate self but otherwise stayed quiet, his brown eyes glued to a point over Richards’ shoulder. James didn’t know why that frustrated him too. No could ever accuse Stark of being quiet. He was as loud and verbose as they come, yet he wasn’t saying anything.

Reed exhaled harshly and met James’ glare with one of his own, “We know that you killed Tony’s parents and Rogers went to war for you. But I’m going to ask you one thing, don’t call what happened between the two of them…that.”

“Isn’t that what the handlers asked him to do?”

“Yes.” The other man conceded, “However, you have to recognize Natasha’s decisions too. She made the best out of their situation. I’m not saying it’s right but do you think she had a choice?”

James didn’t have to dignify that with an answer they all knew the only reply to that.

“She loved them, you know.” Sue, who had been silent as well, near whispered that drew their attention to her, “Why do you think she did everything she could do to save them.” She stared him dead in the eye, “_He_ loved them too. They didn’t let what HYDRA did to them stop them from moving forward. Who knows if they had eventually become lovers? Maybe they did. Given how protective they were of each other and how she never tolerated anyone who breathed a word against him or maybe they didn’t and they became great friends instead. Again, who knows? One thing was for sure, though, they and the children were a family.”

“Maybe.” He allowed, suddenly tired from the emotional roller coaster this meeting revealed itself to be, “I’ll give you that. Perhaps she didn’t hold what happened to them against him and loved the kids but don’t expect me to think that erased everything that he did to her. He killed her parents and suddenly she was going to live her life as the mother of their murderer’s children.”

“It’s not your fault, James. Don’t push Jamie and Ellie away.”

Hearing the twins’ names carved a hole in his chest, “You misunderstood my point, Mrs. Richards. I don’t hate them, I do think they’re lovely. It’s not their fault how they were brought into the world. What I can’t stand is the fact that you’re taking away our choice and disregarding what happened to their parents, especially their mother, to make yourselves feel better because you’ve accomplished what their mother asked of you before she died. To be honest, you can call me a hypocrite I don’t really care, I don’t think you have the children’s best interests in mind.”

Sue lurched back into her seat, her face shaken as though James had slapped her.

“That’s enough.” Reed ground out, temper rising at the insult to his wife, “Barnes, I understand you’re upset but there’s no need to throw insults around. We’re doing this because we _do_ believe you and Tony are what’s best for the children.”

“As I understood it, they came from a loving home and they were born at the time their parents were, at least, civil with each other. That’s all they’ve ever known. Now, what do you think will happen if you handed them over to two people that are probably gonna be at each other’s throats most of the time? If you’re asking me to give them a chance, I’ll give them that. A chance to be in a peaceful home without being dragged into the mess between the people that are supposed to take care of them? I’m all for it. I have to ask however, are you sure they’re gonna find that with the two of us? I don’t think so, not when one made it a point to think about the issues we both have on our own, let alone those between us. ”

Stark’s eyes snapped from whatever he was staring at, for God knows how long, to look at him. There was an indecipherable look in his face.

“James, stop blaming yourself. It’s not—“

“Again, repeating that doesn’t erase the fact that _I_ did those things, Mrs. Richards. I don’t have control over my actions, true. But no matter how we spin it, they happened and it was me who acted on those orders. If you really want to insist that I shouldn’t be thinking like this, then why don’t we ask someone who knew what it was like to have the Winter Soldier ruin their life?”

They all turned to the billionaire, waiting for him to say something with bated breath. His jaw clenched tightly, eyes flitting from James to the couple then averted his eyes with an inaudible huff.

James wasn’t going to pretend that the silence didn’t sting. He had expected the man to agree and it was obvious Stark did, however, it seemed the man was adamant in not giving him the satisfaction of verbally confirming that James was in the same page as he was.

For once.

Pushing the thought aside, he turned to the couple pointedly, “There you go.”

“Tony…Is—” Sue said softly and stopped when her husband inconspicuously shook his head.

“I think it’s time I take my leave. I apologize for any distress I caused, Mrs. Richards.” James announced, standing up from his seat, “If there’s something I can do for the kids you know how to reach me. This has been…thrilling, for the lack of a better word. I’ll say it again, thank you for having me here. Good day.”

* * *

He didn’t bother to wait for their responses and quickly lead himself out of the building. Embarrassment for going off like an emotional teenager and anger at himself for showing weakness in front of others twisting in his guts. Damn, Natalia would laugh herself into a coma if she ever finds out.

James almost didn’t hear the brisk steps of someone following him. When he noticed, he turned a corner to enter an alley and waited for whoever was following him. It took a few seconds before the person caught up with James. Part of him wanted to burst into another bout of hysterics when he saw Stark enter the alley with a disgruntled look on his face when he accidentally stepped on a small puddle, splashing muddy water over his expensive leather shoes.

There was only one way they could get out of the alley and that was from where they came in. However, the wall a bit farther behind James wasn’t that high—for an enhanced or someone really good at parkour—he could jump over it, using the walls of the buildings for a boost.

James schooled his face into a more neutral expression as the genius moved closer to him.

“Something you need?”

If there was a bit of amusement that seeped into his tone, James figured he could be forgiven. After all, the irony of Stark seeking him out after he had told James in so many words to get the hell away from him was not lost on the super soldier.

“You didn’t have to be so rude to Sue. She was just trying to help.” Stark frowned, for once not snarling in James’ face.

James hummed in agreement, “I’m aware, but that’s not what you’re really here for, are you? It’s not about the high-bred boy reprimanding some asshole for his manners or lack thereof.”

Stark exasperatedly rolled his eyes in that ridiculously intricate manner that Steve liked to wax poetic about. A frown almost showed itself on James’ lips.

_Jesus. Of all times to be reminded of Steve._

“How about you stop acting like an edgy, emo poster boy wannabe for a moment?”

“As you wish.” He deadpanned with a slight bow.

The smaller man glared at him in response, fists clenching as though he wanted to wrap them around his neck.

“Look Barnes, I’m not here for whatever bullshit you’re trying to stir up. I’m just here to tell you that I received a message from the Council. They want us, Sue and Reed to show up for a meeting with CPS two days from now.”

“You could’ve just forwarded that to me.”

Stark pinned him with dull look. “I don’t have your contact info.”

James’ eyebrow shot up, “Oh? Weren’t you just screaming at me like a banshee weeks ago that _I’m_ sending you messages through your AI? You could’ve just asked her to do it for you.”

He would not admit to his dying day that his ego was soothed tremendously when Stark failed to come up with a comeback.

“Or is this your roundabout way of asking for my number?” he drawled sarcastically with a nasty grin.

Just like how it had been in the hallway, Stark’s eyes narrowed into slits with a flush of indignation coloring his cheeks. “Eat dirt and die, you asshole.”

“Classy.”

“Really, Barnes?” The smaller man huffed in disbelief, “You are so full of it today, aren’t you? You wanna know why I followed you here? Fine! I want know what the fuck is your problem. Don’t give that ‘I’m all for the kids’ best interests’ bullshit you gave Reed back there. That’s not what…”he waved a hand over James’ form, “whatever the hell’s going on with you is about. It sure as fuck isn’t just about Natasha and what happened to her. You’re making this whole thing out to be about me.”

It was James’ turn to huff incredulously, “I’m making this about you? You flatter yourself too much, Stark.”

“Well, judging by how you just ranted on and on about how everything is your fault because you’re assuming I think so? You even added what happened in the Civil War and that the Winter Soldier ruined my life. Then, there’s also the fact that you and Romanoff are snooping around and shoving things into my face to amuse yourselves? Yes, you son of a bitch. Your problem is most definitely about me.”

“Assuming you think so? That’s not an assumption, doll. That’s a fact. Why else would you be unable to tell Richards and his wife otherwise?”

Stark regarded him with a mean, triumphant smirk, “So it _is_ about me. No, it’s not exactly me but about _you_ by proxy. I get that you feel bad about what happened to our alternate reality selves and all the shit that happened here as well. But, get this through that thick skull of yours, Barnes. I’ll be damned if I ever let you _use_ me for self-flagellation.”

“That’s not what this is about.” James gritted out.

“It is and you know it.” Stark shot back, “What was that you said earlier? About calling you a hypocrite? I hope you know that I’m impressed you actually managed to say that with your whole damn chest while lying to Reed and Sue about caring for the kids. You are a fucking hypocrite. You’re using me, now Natasha, Jamie and Ellie to hurt yourself all the while preaching about atonement and making amends.”

James jerked back in surprise, he never told Stark anything about making amends. Stark caught on to that and said, “FRIDAY, my AI, for some unfathomable reason is fond of you. Don’t worry I’ll thoroughly scrub her code after this. On the way to the Baxter Building, she sent me that clip of you ripping Rogers’ head off in the hallway.”

The thought of Stark’s AI nosing around something so private spurred him on, “And what a pair we make, because if I’m a hypocrite then so are you. C’mon, Stark, tell it straight to my face that you want to raise the kids fathered by your parents’ murderer.” He continued after a beat when Stark didn’t answer, “You’re telling me off about how I don’t really care nor want them when you can’t bring yourself to think about raising them at all. I’m betting my left arm that your first plan of action was to pawn them off to someone else with a trust fund that will set both of them up for generations.”

The way those brown orbs darted away for a second was enough confirmation for James.

“I’m using you to hurt myself? Then why don’t we talk about you helping me get rid of my triggers to make yourself feel better? We both know that you didn’t send your tech to Wakanda because you think I’m innocent and that what happened to your mother was HYDRA’s fault. You did that because it makes you sleep better at night knowing that in some way you had one upped Steve in the race to pseudo-sainthood while rubbing his nose into the fact that he wasn’t able to do anything to help me.”

Stark stepped closer to him and sneered, “Say whatever you want about me, but don’t you fucking dare bring my mother into this, you bastard! See how you’re using her to get a word in? Now I’m getting an idea why you and Rogers are friends. You are both users, liars and hypocrites! You’re practically the same per—”

James grabbed him by his upper arms and pushed him against the wall. Stark hissed as his head collided with the concrete.

“**I’M NOT STEVE!**” he roared with a snarl and Stark recoiled with no small amount of fear.

His anger evaporated when he felt the genius’ hands futilely trying to push against his chest. James’ gaze went to Stark’s face and he felt a phantom punch to his gut.

The billionaire’s head was turned away from him but James would recognize that look anywhere. It was how Stark looked like back in Siberia, flinching in terror as Steve brought down the shield to his chest.

James’ fingers loosened their vise grip on Stark’s arms in shock, “I-I’m…I…oh god…” Some discomfort were lifted away from the smaller man’s face when his hold on him slackened. Fuck, he was definitely leaving bruises on him. Rhodes would have a valid reason to kill him now.

As soon as the thought invaded his mind, his eyes were drawn to the now-vivid patches of color decorating the column of the genius’ neck. Jesus, it looked like someone mauled him.

“—way, Barnes.”

His eyes flew back to Stark’s face when he caught the last bit of that wheezy request.

“G-get away from me.” The smaller man repeated in that same gasp, now staring straight at him.

* * *

“—after you left the Baxter Building, Tony followed you into an alley and you had a shouting match?” Natalia summarized, turning off the TV. “That sounds like Tony, alright.” she added almost fondly.

“Yeah.” James wet his lips with his tongue, “That’s about it. Then I went to the theater and watched some horror movie. I slept inside until the second showing. You wouldn’t believe how many _kids_ were making out in there.”

“Welcome to the 21st century, Soldat. Theaters are not just for the moving pictures anymore. To the people who can’t afford to get a room, especially to horny teenagers, it’s the next best thing.”

“Ugh.” He grimaced, raking a hand over his hair, “That’s fine and all, but I just happened to pick a damn seat where everywhere I looked there were kids swapping spit. Christ, some of them don’t even know how to kiss properly. One kid kissed like he thought French kissing involved moving someone’s tongue rapidly like a goddamn lizard on crack.”

Natalia snorted, “Of all things that caught your eye.”

“It was actually the moment I decided I’d rather sleep than endure anymore of that.”

“You know, Soldat…”she said still using Turkish, “with everything that’s going on, your life is sounding like a trashy fanfic some moron wrote and shared online to have a semblance of social life.”

James smacked his teeth, “Really, Natalia?” he retorted in English. She’s not wrong, but admitting it kinda sucked.

“C’mon now, Soldat. You? A happy father to twins? Granted it’s an alternate version of you. Even better, you have alternate reality Tony Stark as your baby mama.”

He dragged both hands over his face, “I don’t even know what to do but yes, rub it in why don’t you.”

Natalia smirked, her eyes gleaming with delight, “I don’t have to. It’s already the universe working so you’d finally get your wish to screw Tony into the floor.”

James hung his head in defeat and groaned, “You’re despicable.”

* * *

The two assassins missed it when someone who was walking towards them stopped near the entryway of the common room almost as soon as they switched in English. A slim hand came up to cover a mouth upon catching details of the conversation.

If they had turned their bodies a scant more towards the threshold, they would’ve seen wisps of scarlet and a flash of bottle-red locks disappearing into the hallway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really Nat? You're coming for me like that? T_T
> 
> Tony and Bucky, I ought to slap your asses. You're acting like douchebags. But sure, get all the mess between you out of the way first before you process Natasha Stark and alt!Bucky's issues. Emotional detox or something...or not. 
> 
> Thanks for stopping by.  
Stay safe and God bless.


	11. Anything there is that I can do for you, I will do for you; anything there is that I cannot do, I will learn to do.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “_Christ_, I don’t know what’s with everybody thinking of Steve as some pure, lost man that has no clue how society worked. Back in the day, he was _sickly_ not stupid."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BAAAAACCCCCCKKK!!!!!!!! 
> 
> I know this chapter should've been posted months ago. I'm sorry.  
Thank you very much if you're reading this and/or still reading this despite the long gaps between posting chapters. I'm actually contemplating whether to cut this one into two chapters or no because it's a whopping 16k (a first for me) but I feel like the flow would be disrupted so I decided to post it as a single chapter. I apologize in advance for drying your eyes because of the dragging pace.
> 
> Since this is MCU and magic, all technicalities will be hand-waved henceforth. After all, MCU ignored a lot of red tape and technicalities too. I'm taking the lovely advice I got a while ago because don't want to erode what's left of my mostly smooth brain. 😂😂
> 
> Now, this chapter's going to be a mess like always. Unbeta'ed as usual, forgive the mistakes. **Not team Cap friendly.** Enjoy.

Natasha stomped on the emotions that arose as she moved down the hallway to the common room. She had been of the mind that something was going to happen since she caught that glance Wanda shot Steve during breakfast when Soldat announced that he was going to meet up with the Fantastic Four again. Natasha waited for either of them to question her about the meeting but nothing happened.

For a couple of hours, at least.

She was reading on her bed when Steve knocked on her door almost an hour ago to meet up in the common room for their lunch. Maybe Sam was right on the money when he called her paranoid but her suspicions that something was up rose to greater heights when Steve personally went to get her for a meal. Any other day it wouldn’t have been an issue, but Steve always sends someone else to gather the rest of the team, unless there’s an important announcement. Therefore, the man himself going to fetch her meant that she _had_ to be there.

She went to buy herself some time to plan what she would do next by telling him she was about to take a shower. She knew he’d be able to hear her the shower if it was on, so she rustled her clothes and told Steve that she was already half-naked and on her way to the bathroom. The blond quickly apologized for interrupting her and asked if she could be with them in fifteen minutes.

“So, I’ll have five minutes to get there and ten minutes for my shower? Steve, ten minutes is a guy’s bath time. I’m a lady. Never rush a lady’s time with her soaps and scrubs.” she answered, pulling a change of clothes from the closet and laying it on her bed. Might as well make that excuse solid. “Forty minutes.”

She heard Steve’s muffled laugh through the door, “Never rush scrubs and soaps time, got it. I’ll keep that in mind but forty minutes is still way too long.”

“Tell you what, I’ll compromise and be there in thirty-five minutes.”

“Thirty-five? C’mon, Nat.”

“Take it or leave it, Rogers.”

“Fine. Don’t complain if the guys didn’t leave anything for you.”

* * *

As of the moment, she had to deliberate whether the others didn’t pick up anything from her little tips and lectures or they were just truly hapless when it came to espionage. Her mood also swung like a pendulum the longer she pondered about it, alternating from being annoyed to being insulted.

First, this farce laid out for her showed that none of her lessons stuck. Soldat would have kittens with that one because that also meant she wasn’t good enough as a mentor, which she would have been to the other girls in the Red Room had she not defected to SHIELD. Second, perhaps, as she considered it, she was moving closer to being offended.

Did Steve really think she wouldn’t be able to detect a set-up if it hit her in the face?

A quiet huff escaped her chest.

Natasha had been trained to plan and see through a set-up ever since she was a child. She had been a spy far longer than he’d been an active soldier. She had been in this _business_ longer than any of the original nor second generation Avengers. Even _Clint_. Not to mention, Steve knew and had seen the things she was capable of, thus, making this rather casual underestimation of her abilities in this instance a bit insulting.

She inhaled deeply through her nose, a reminder of that quick meditation Bruce would do back then, to clear her mind. She slowed her steps to give herself a few more seconds to analyze the situation.

One of the first things she told them when going undercover was that it’s very important not to make drastic nor a series of changes in an established routine. The slightest difference could be sold as a one-off but not a sudden, big alteration. The latter would alert people and make watch their actions closely. With how things were going as of late, she also had to take into account that it was possible that Steve wasn’t exactly underestimating her. She felt cold all over as she recalled the tracking device.

This little game could also be his way of sending her a message without needing to say anything.

_I know what you’re up to._

With all the things laid out for her to look at, everything pointed to it. 

Right now, she was on her way to the common room where the rest of the team gathered…

For lunch_._

Steve was always adamant about having their meals in the dining area. Family tradition, as he liked to put it. They only ate in the common room post-mission, when everyone was too tired to whip something up in the kitchen or during movie/game time.

Plus, Natasha had also taken note of Steve’s attachment issues long ago.

It was usually the main driving force behind his actions. He wasn’t one to take any separation or divide in his circle well. It makes him irrational like a toddler whose security blanket went missing.

Point of fact: Tony and Soldat. 

Which makes this gathering to happen at a time where Soldat wouldn’t be around very strange, because Steve always made sure to include the man in everything. Normally, he would have texted Soldat and asked if he could make it back in time to join them. He didn’t—he would have mentioned doing so—therefore, Soldat wasn’t supposed to know about it.

Also, Clint left for Missouri early in the morning to visit his family. Laura had finally relented to increase the frequency of his visits, which had considerably improved his overall mood. That on its own wasn’t alarming, in fact it was a happy occurrence. Everyone was glad for Clint. Wanda especially, because that meant she’d be able to visit Nathaniel later on if Clint managed to get back to his wife’s good graces completely.

That meant Steve had purposely chosen a time where the two people who would back her up were away. He knew that Soldat would help her when push comes to shove, while, despite siding with him in the Civil War, Clint’s flag was mainly in Natasha’s camp.

_Isolate and intimidate._

Natasha couldn’t help but think how ironic it was that Steve would take a play straight out of Alexander Pierce’s book. Of course, that being said, it’s clear that blood being drawn wouldn’t be out of the menu if she wasn’t careful. 

* * *

“Hey.” She said serenely as she stepped into the threshold then walked around the sofa to take her place on the chair opposite Wanda. Sam and Scott echoed her greeting, both already digging into their takeout feast. Wanda, conversely, returned it a bit too enthusiastically. The younger woman was either going for had-a-good-sleep kind of cheerful and missing by a mile or she just didn’t care about putting effort into sounding more natural.

“Hi.” Steve replied with a small smile.

To anyone else it would have looked like his characteristic modest grin but the tightness around his eyes belied what he hid behind it. He handed a plate to her to keep the charade of normalcy, which she gratefully accepted.

“Anything from the Council?” she asked, making a show of surveying the loads of takeout they laid out on the center table. The habit of preparing meals for two super soldiers and five more fully-grown adults was quite difficult to shake. She settled for the satay and java rice then poured herself a glass of orange juice. “It’s weird not to receive at least three emails asking us to finish reports.”

“Nothing much on that end.” Sam chimed in, nearly done with his laksa, “To be honest, I’m glad they don’t have anything for us to do today. We need some time off, I tell ya.”

Steve chuckled, swallowing the last bite of his banh mi, “C’mon, Sam. We’re Avengers, helping people is our job.”

“There.” The other man countered, jabbing his fork towards Steve to highlight his point, “_Our job. _We work our asses off and risk our lives and we don’t get any down time? Medical professionals get some time for themselves too y’know.”

“Once in a blue moon.” Natasha said, swallowing a bite of her satay, “You do know us going on missions add up to their workloads. So don’t complain.”

“Exactly my point! We need some days off to take away the Domino effect happening when we’re on missions. Medics, cops—“

“I think we get the point, Sam.” Steve cut in nearly startling everyone. When it became apparent that his interruption came out harsher than intended, he gave Sam a winning grin to soften it, “Not that I don’t agree, man. It’s just that…we know the bad guys don’t exactly care about us getting some rest.”

The flimsy cover up did save the earlier jovial mood albeit barely.

Sam, belatedly realizing how close his comments touched on one of the reasons for the Civil War, winced, “Sorry, Cap.”

The blond’s smile dimmed a smidge, “It’s alright, Sam. You didn’t mean to.” The ensuing silence continued for a little while before Scott decided to lighten up the atmosphere.

He looked back and forth between the two and beamed, “Hey, at least we’re all together right now. Right? Though, it kinda sucks that we’re not complete. I-I mean, it’s good Arrow Guy got to see his kids today, makes me wanna see Cassie too. But, yeah, what I’m saying is Bucky’s not here. That’s what sucks. Y’know, he makes really mean omelets.”

Of course, leave it to Scott Lang to accidentally step on a landmine in his efforts to cheer others.

Steve had surreptitiously stiffened whereas Wanda had leapt on that thread like an eager kitten.

“It sure does, Scott” she said, almost cooing at the older man, “I do wonder though, why did he leave so early?”

Natasha didn’t have to think about whom the question was addressed to, not with the expectant way Steve was staring at her.

“Didn’t he say he was going to have another meeting with the Fantastic Four?” she offered evenly which made the younger woman smile.

“Ah, they’re the team that goes into other universes, right?”

She nodded as she chewed, waiting to see if there was more to the question while Sam gently chided Wanda for not remembering other teams.

“Sam, it’s not like the Council will quiz us on what the other teams are doing.” Steve shook his head with a fond huff.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that, Sam.” The witch responded and then, with a sly twinkle in her eye, glanced at Natasha, “I’m just curious about what they _find_ in other realities they visit.”

Natasha kept her face open, meeting the younger woman’s stare head on then to the latter’s surprise, smiled, “I’m sure you are. Can you imagine what we’re gonna be like in other worlds?”

“You know, not gonna lie, I kinda think about how weird it is for them to like, meet their alternate selves several times over.” Sam agreed, wiping his mouth with a napkin. “That shit gotta be making them crazy.”

“Language.” Steve admonished playfully, making the Airman roll his eyes, “And yes, I also wonder about what the Avengers are like in other worlds.” He included in a way that made it obvious to the rest of them that it wasn’t just the team in general he was talking about. Steve gave them all a sheepish smile when he realized that they’ve all gone quiet and that he wasn’t alone. He focused on folding the parchment paper his banh mi was wrapped in into a neat square.

Sam tried to downplay the awkwardness by taking a sip of his juice and Wanda just petulantly stabbed a spring roll with her fork before taking a bite. The duty of dissolving any form of tension seemed to have somehow fallen on Scott’s lap, doing so as he spoke up again.

“Ugh. I still mess up when facing Hope as it is. I don’t think I’ll get the hang of it even if I meet her again from the first time repeatedly.” He muttered mournfully, listlessly stirring his pad thai with his fork.

Sam patted his shoulder, “Aww, Tic Tac. It’s okay. We know you could just let her kick your ass every time to make it easier.”

Scott grinned and mock-sobbed on his shoulder making them all laugh.

“Wanna know something?” Natasha said conspiratorially when they all settled again. She placed her fork down her plate before reaching for a napkin, “Since we’re on the topic of alternate universes, I found out something about Soldat.”

The way Natasha had voluntarily provided the information she and Steve wanted to force out of her seemed to confuse the witch, though she impressively kept the smile on her face to not give herself away. She turned a little towards Steve, seeking guidance whilst the soldier, always sensitive to Wanda’s moods, picked up the slack.

Steve’s eyes bore into her with sudden, almost terrifying, intensity before she had even finished her sentence. “Oh?”

“Apparently, Reed Richards had told him that he had kids in one of the universes.” She returned with the same tone after she took a sip from her glass. “He invited Soldat to the Baxter Building the other day, remember?”

Wanda bounced back from her earlier bafflement, sensing an opportunity and doggedly probed, “That’s not all he said.”

“Well, yes.” The assassin concurred easily, “He asked Soldat to drop by for a mission. We were all there with him when he got the message didn’t he?”

Irritation slipped over the witch’s pale features as she dully droned, “What about _Stark_? The doctor told him something about that man too.”

Sam and Scott wore puzzled expressions at the mention of Tony that went flying out of the left field.

“Stark? Why are we talkin’ bout him now?”

When no one answered Sam, Scott added, “Did he do something? I mean, like recently, that we didn’t know about?”

Natasha blinked slowly.

“Tony?”

The younger woman made a noise of frustration and snapped, “You know what I’m talking about, Natasha. I heard you and Bucky—” her mouth shut as she realized her mistake also because of the hand that Steve laid on her arm. Wanda pressed her lips together and looked away with a frown.

The blond stepped in to, presumably, save their ‘mission’, “Look, Nat.” Steve started his voice taking on a frantic but appeasing note, “We’re gonna be honest with you. Wanda kinda overheard you and Bucky the other night and she told me about it.”

Natasha’s eyes moved from Steve to Wanda before sighing, “Wanda, why didn’t you just come over and joined us? We wouldn’t mind talking to you, there was no need to eavesdrop.”

Wanda flushed, embarrassed and irritated at getting caught, “I wasn’t eavesdropping! I just happened to hear you two talking on my way to the kitchen for a glass of water.”

“You mean, you saw them talking and decided to hell with water and listened in on their conversation.” Sam scowled. “They were just talking and you were getting something to drink, you didn’t need to stay. The moment you decided to stay, that’s when overhearing turned into eavesdropping.

“Sam.”

“C’mon, Steve. You can’t seriously believe it was just an accident. If any of us could do that mind-scanning thingamajig, getting information without being noticed by _two_ _master_ _assassins_ is a piece of cake. It’s either she used her powers to read their thoughts or she hid and listened as they talked—and we both know which scenario is more believable.”

Natasha looked at the man in mild surprise, she didn’t really expect him to go and shut Steve up like that.

“You’re not calling her a liar, are you? Sam, you know better than that.”

“I’m not. I just think there’s more to this.”

“That’s the same thing.”

Sam raised his hands.

“Okay, man. Whatever you say. The point is, Wanda’s not supposed to be using her powers for no reason at all. She probably did that the other night because she thought new tea was getting spilled or whatever. You do know that if Ross got a wind of this, he’ll go after our asses again saying we’re cool with Wanda just causally peeking into people’s minds.”

“Ross is not going after us again. I’m not going to let that happen. We signed the Accords.”

“And the Accords Council warned us about what’s going to happen if we use our abilities on innocent people.” The Falcon finished then turned to the witch, “We already had a talk about this.”

The witch tugged at the ends of her hair whereas Steve had no choice but to rest his case because Sam’s argument was sound.

“You didn’t use your powers?” Natasha queried, “Soldat’s a super soldier. If you had been that near to hear us, he would’ve heard you move closer. I’ve worked long enough with both Steve and Soldat to know that they can hear heartbeat if someone was near enough.”

Scott’s eyes went wide as he whispered to Sam, “They can hear our heartbeat?”

“Not now, Tic Tac.” Sam whispered back.

When the younger woman refused to acknowledge the question, even Steve became curious about her answer because for as much as he let the young woman use her magic during practice, he didn’t exactly approve of her using magic that much in the Compound.

He turned to her, disapproval clear on his face and predictably, Wanda caved in.

“Arghh! Alright! I did use my magic but just make sure Bucky didn’t hear me. That’s about it. I shielded myself to avoid any making noise. I didn’t even understand what you two were talking about.”

Sam closed his eyes and rubbed circles at his temple with one hand, “Wanda…”

“Shut up, Sam. It’s not like I really wanted to, okay? I got curious!”

Scott kept his mouth shut though he did shake his head in dismay as he continued with eating his food.

Natasha’s eyebrows creased in a small frown, there was something else the younger woman was not telling them.

“_Wanda_.” Steve said sternly, paired with a knocking look they all—except Scott—were used to seeing him give Tony. They all could guess what he was asking from the young woman.

The witch flinched, whining like the child the soldier always treated her as, “Steve…”

“Don’t make me ask again, Wanda.” He cut her tersely, the demand for _absolute_ _obedience_ apparent in every syllable that even those he wasn’t addressing unconsciously sat up sharply.

A wounded look of betrayal flashed on Wanda’s face before she meekly lowered her head. This time, she was painting a more convincing picture of a rebuked child.

“I’m telling the truth. I only used my magic to avoid getting found out.” When Steve merely stared at her, she anxiously continued, trying her best to mollify the super soldier. “Believe me, Steve. I didn’t read their minds. I wanted to—”

“Goddammit.” Sam muttered under his breath, he waved a hand at Steve “Did you hear that? She _wanted_ to, Steve.”

“But she didn’t do it.”

“I can’t understand what they were saying. All the screaming nonsense and gore from that disgusting movie they were watching distracted me.” Wanda mumbled, picking on her nails then glared at Natasha.

“There, see? She stopped.” Steve asserted. “Quit dog piling on her.”

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s going to be enough, Cap.” Scott joined in, uncharacteristically serious. “Wanda said that she stopped because she got distracted _not_ because she remembered she wasn’t supposed to use her magic. That means she would’ve definitely used it then if not for the movie.” He inclined his head at Steve before lifting his glass from the table.

“X to the Y to the Mothafuckinxactly.” Sam exclaimed, “Ten points for Tic Tac.”

“Sam!”

The airman didn’t look affected by the reproaching tone, “Cap, I love you man, but pack it up. This ain’t the hill you wanna die on.”

Steve’s shoulder’s slumped at that whilst Wanda sent him daggers.

“I only caught the last part about Stark and Bucky having children. I didn’t stay that long to hear the rest.”

Natasha didn’t flinch at the revelation, though she may as well have gone and fired several rounds from the gun tucked in her boot with how the men went still from Wanda’s words.

Scott let out a strangled sound as his juice went down the wrong pipe and Sam sputtered, “Hold on, hold on…Stark and Barnes having—Wanda, you do realize that’s not exactly possible right? I mean, they could adopt, but Stark kinda hates him, so that ain’t happening.”

Steve pinned the two men with a frown and motioned for Sam to help Scott. Sam distractedly grabbed a napkin and placed it on the other’s hand then patted his back.

“I know that, Sam. I’m not stupid.” the witch sneered, making the man lift his hands in surrender.

Natasha gave both men a passing glance before she let her stare linger on Steve and Wanda. She did so for a second longer then laughed delicately, “Oh…_that_.”

All eyes turned to her and the younger woman’s sneer became a little more pronounced, “Yes, _that_.”

“There’s no need to get angry, _lapochka_. I am going to explain it anyway.”

Scott tilted his head, like a curious puppy, “Really? So it’s not some secret or anything?”

“To be honest, Soldat just decided to share it with me first because he felt the most comfortable with telling me.” She stared at Steve pointedly, “He thought things would go sideways if he told Steve about it.”

Sam pursed his lips while Scott cringed. The training room incident was still an awkward topic. Everyone avoided that elephant in the room, as well as its sibling—the brawl in the gym that followed a bit later. Steve, at least, had the decency to look shame-faced. Keeping his mouth shut and refrained from arguing.

“I’ll be the first to say that I don’t think there was an actual need to tell everyone about it. It’s essentially a no problem, because while his alternate self had children with a female version of Tony Stark—“

Steve inhaled sharply at that, while Scott’s jaw became acquainted with the floor.

“—they were in another universe and it was a dead Earth.”

Sam leaned closer with his elbows planted on his knees, “Dead Earth? You don’t mean…”

“An incursion?” Scott filled in and Natasha nodded somberly.

“They’re dead?” Steve’s voice cracked, his face looking a shade off devastated. Blue green eyes flicking back and forth like he was thinking why wasn’t he able to do something to prevent it.

“Yes.”

Wanda folded her arms over her chest, “Steve still needs to know. We’re a team. We shouldn’t be keeping secrets from each other.”

A red brow rose as Natasha appraised the younger redhead, “Wanda, now that I’ve told Steve about it, what are we going to do? Hold a televised funeral for the fallen heroes that died in a _different universe_? Are you going to wear a black veil and wail over _empty coffins_?”

“What coffins?”

* * *

All five of them nearly jumped out of their seats at the sound. Soldat was standing in the entryway, arms crossed over his chest. Steve was the first one to recover, giving his friend a shaky grin.

“Buck, you’re early.”

Soldat huffed, “Didn’t know I should be back much later.” He went closer to them and occupied the space next to Sam. “You forgot to send me the memo.”

“That’s not what I meant, pal.” Steve replied, handing him a plate and a fork. 

“Sure sound like it.” He lightly kicked the Falcon’s legs to make the man provide him a little more room—despite the sofa being big enough to seat five people. “Move.”

“Damn, aren’t you just a real ray of sunshine?” Sam slid in sarcastically, scooting a little closer to Scott, “Much more than usual.”

“You try to sit on your ass for almost two hours listening to some technical sci-fi sounding shit, understanding nothing and still don’t after they broke it down for you. Let’s see you break out of the conference room singing like Maria von Trapp.” The brunet soldier groused, loading up his plate with satay and pad thai. “I was told that I’m just gonna shoot some bastards for them, didn’t expect Richards to recite one of his goddamn dissertations.”

“That’s just ‘cause you’re a dumbass.” Sam chortled, chucking a crumpled napkin at him.

“Shut up.” Soldat swatted it with his metal hand and it went flying over to Steve who caught it mid-air before it landed on his face.

“Guys, knock it off. Not in front of the food.”

“I didn’t do nothin’. Sam started it.”

“What are you, four?”

Soldat ignored him in favor of Scott, “Lang, can you explain some of this for me?” He motioned to the file he had beside him on the sofa. “All this fuckin’ sorcery didn’t exist yet in the 30’s.”

“Language, Buck.” Steve admonished lightly. Soldat just waved a dismissive hand in return, attention still on Scott.

“You mean you want Tic Tac dumb it _way_ down for you.” Sam snickered at the brunet soldier.

“Stop acting like you know any of this shit, Wilson. I’ll bet your eyes are gonna fall right off after reading two sentences from the first page.”

Scott scrunched his nose, reminding Natasha of an apologetic puppy.

“Sorry. I’ve read some of Dr. Richards’ papers for a class while working on my Master’s but most of it flew over my head too. It’s not really my field.”

Natasha had instantly noticed the folder Soldat had when he arrived but didn’t think to comment. Good thing the man opened that discussion himself. “Is that the mission?” she asked before the man got too carried away bickering with Sam.

He looked at her, all trace of childishness gone. “Yeah. I saved a file for you to look at. You’re going with us.” He passed the file to her then concentrated again on eating. Natasha accepted the papers though she didn’t open it. The manila folder used indicated that the mission was tagged as classified and high risk.

Steve’s head snapped to Soldat, “What? Why? I thought Richards said they only needed a sniper? I didn’t hear about this.”

The older soldier set his plate down, nodding gratefully at Scott who passed him a glass of juice. He downed it in two large gulps and answered, “Because I didn’t think it’s necessary to have her on board until the briefing. The new intel suggested that the mission will require another agent for undercover.”

“Why not bring in Clint then? He’s good at undercover too.”

“Look, I damn well know he’s good, Steve.” Soldat replied, immediately turning to Sam and Scott, “If he finds out I said that, I will gut you both.”

“Wait, why am I included?” Scott squawked, paling at the threat. “Why can’t it be just Sam?”

The super soldier only narrowed his eyes, “Because I said so.”

“The therapy ain’t working. You need Jesus, man.” Sam muttered then slapped a hand on Scott’s back, “I’m not letting you win on the next game night. No mercy for you, traitor.”

“Stop fooling around, guys. This is important.”

“_Christ_.” Soldat muttered under his breath. “Look Stevie, the thing is, Barton’s not here and I have to leave for Madripoor as soon as possible. Even I know he’s going to pass on this one because he’s with his family and Natalia’s available.” The man reclined a little back on the sofa, “Besides, I don’t think Barton’s gonna look even half as good as she does in a pencil skirt.”

Sam cackled.

“Nossir. He don’t have the goods for that.”

“Yeah, no offense to Arrow guy but Black Widow’s the better choice.” Scott concurred, with a laugh then suddenly clammed up when he saw Natasha looking at him, as though he was expecting her to hit him. The Wasp probably did that a lot when he made comments on the same vein about her.

Natasha only let out an almost unladylike snort, taking them all aback, “You’d be surprised.”

Her amusement went up a notch when Steve’s eyes widened in surprise while Wanda blinked.

“You serious?”

She truly smiled at Steve for the first time since she entered the common room, “Ask him about _Sweet Belinda from the Bayou of Georgia_ some time. The pretty Southern belle with Farrah Fawcett hair, neon pink pencil skirt and purple feather boa.”

“He didn’t tell me about that.” Wanda mused, brows furrowing.

“Probably don’t want to surprise you too much.” Steve reasoned with a grin.

“Or maybe because he thinks we’re going to laugh at him.”

A beat later, all of them were chuckling at the image.

“Sweet Belinda from the Bayou of Georgia!” Sam hollered, clutching his abdomen.

“Fucking _purple _feather boa.” Soldat sniggered, face palmed.

“With a neon pink skirt.” Scott added, wiping tears from his eyes.

“Everyone, don’t be rude.” Natasha chided without heat, finishing the last of her drink, “One of Belinda’s admirers from the bar she worked at in Delaware said she looked a bit like a young, hot Rue McClanahan.”

That only resulted in more laughter from the three men whilst Steve patiently explained to Wanda who Rue McClanahan was. They all took a few minutes to compose themselves and continued with their meal until Soldat perked up, seemingly recalling something.

“By the way, why were you guys talking about coffins when I came in?” he raked a hand through his hair, smirking, “Did Ross finally kick the bucket?”

“You really don’t like him, huh?” Sam replied with a stilted laugh.

“What’s not to _dislike_?” The older man riposted, but his grin fell when the others, bar Natasha, averted their eyes.

“What?”

“We weren’t talking about Ross.” Steve chewed on his lip then answered vaguely “It was just something Wanda told us.”

“Wanda?” Soldat’s eyes flitted to the witch, “You attending someone’s funeral?”

The younger woman quickly shook her head, apparently surprised the man addressed her directly, “No. There’s no funeral.”

Sam rubbed the back of his neck, heaving a sigh, “Just tell him.”

“Sam, don’t—”

“Cap, c’mon. You said no secrets. Why won’t you tell ‘im that Wanda was eavesdropping on him and Nat the other night?”

The playful expression sloughed off Soldat’s face and the earlier cheerful ambiance in the common room had plummeted to the floor in a flash. “Eavesdropping?”

“Ugh.” Steve groaned, scrunching his eyes in exasperation. When he opened them, Steve found himself being stared down by a pair of furious blue gray orbs. “Buck, relax, it isn’t what you think it is.”

The brunet super soldier huffed, gaze sharper than a fine-edged sword, “I don’t know, Stevie. I can’t tell what I’m supposed to think because sometimes my teammates don’t tell me things.”

Steve froze, face taking on a gray cast.

Tension became thicker the longer the silence dragged, the other occupants of the room were becoming aware that a reversal in the soldiers’ moods was taking place as the two continued to weigh each other.

“_What did you say?_” the younger man breathed tremulously.

“Are you hard of hearing now, punk? I said sometimes my—”

“_I_ said that.”

“What?”

“I said that to _Tony, _Buck. I told him that back at Clint’s homestead. You _weren’t_ there. _Sometimes my teammates don’t tell me things_. _I _said that.” The blond gritted through his teeth, “How did you know about it?”

Soldat’s eyes widened a fraction when the epiphany occurred, his gaze touching on the rest of them. “Is that it? What you were talking about earlier? It’s about _Stark_?”

Scott tried to alleviate the tension again, “Well, more like you and him, er, not him-_him_…but a _girl_ him. Wait, that’s—”

“Lang!” Sam barked testily, making Scott cower a little. “Zip it.”

Steve went on, not paying the other men any mind, “Did Tony tell you?”

“What the hell are you on about?” Soldat grimaced, “Tell me what?”

Steve stood up to his full height to stare down his nose at the older man. “Don’t evade question, Buck. Answer me. _Did Tony tell you about it_?”

The action incensed Soldat and he shot up to his feet as well, nearly toppling the center table between them. “The fuck’s the matter with you?”

Sam and Scott quickly jumped to their feet to hold both men back, Wanda and Natasha following suit.

“Don’t do it, Bucky.” Scott whispered to the assassin, trying to pull him away from the other man. “It’s not worth it.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Lang.” Soldat aimed the sneer at Steve, “A good ol’ punch to the face is worth it if it will wake Steve the fuck up and make him quit being a jealous, paranoid asshole.”

“Barnes! Shut the hell up. You’re not helping.” Sam hissed furiously as he tried to push Steve back. “Steve, calm down.” His words were for naught because the blond pointed an accusing finger at Soldat’s face.

“I didn’t tell you about that! You wouldn’t know about it unless Tony told you!”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Steve.” Soldat brusquely shrugged Scott’s grip off his shoulder, “I just mention something you apparently told the guy some time ago and you lose it?”

“Then how did you know?!”

“I didn’t know! _He didn’t tell me shit_! You damn well know the guy avoids us like the fucking plague!” Soldat roared, the servos in his metal arm whirring ominously, “It was just a coincidence, dammit! I didn’t know you fucking copyrighted the damned thing!”

Natasha gently placed a hand on his flesh arm, “Soldat.”

His eyes swiveled towards her, searching, then sought Wanda, who was beside Steve. The younger woman moved closer to Steve as though afraid that Soldat might lunge at her. The blond swiftly went on high alert. Anger forgotten and taking on a more defensive stance to protect the witch.

“Buck, don’t try to take your anger out on Wanda. She’s just a girl.”

“Just a girl.” Soldat deadpanned then disdainfully continued, “Can you stop white knighting the shit out of her? Wanda can tear someone apart without breaking a sweat, Steve. Stop treating her like a wounded baby rabbit. And quit making it seem like I’m the one who goes on a rampage because of some dumbass shit.”

“You’re getting mad at her for something she didn’t mean to happen.”

“Oh, fuck off.” Soldat grouched, rubbing a hand over his mouth, “Don’t try to pin this on me to save her ass. I answered your dumb question about your shitty quote, now answer mine. Did you send Wanda to eavesdrop on us?”

“Oh crap.” Scott murmured, drawing a censuring look from Sam.

Steve stared at the older man as though he just screamed ‘Hail, Hydra’ at the top of his lungs. “No! What are you saying?”

“Now it’s your turn to play dumb? She wouldn’t do anything without you telling her. So you better come clean Steve. Did you tell her to eavesdrop on us?”

“Why would I do that?”

“Same reason you’d send Natalia to follow Stark around. You’re one jealous motherfucker.”

“That’s not true!” Steve shouted, “I didn’t tell Wanda to do such a thing!”

“Barnes, that’s a bit of a stretch. We already cleared that up earlier. You can ask Romanoff.” Sam stepped in, his voice in that calming cadence he would use in his sessions at the VA.

“Sam’s not lying.” Wanda added petulantly. “Steve didn’t send me. I just overheard you two talking and then I told Steve about it.”

“And you used you powers?” Soldat gave her a withering glare, “No way I wouldn’t notice that you were there, Wanda. I would’ve heard you. Did you dig into our heads?”

“I did use my powers but not in the way you think. I just shielded myself so you won’t hear me.”

“Then you told Steve.”

“That’s all. He didn’t tell me to use my powers on you.”

Natasha frowned, stepping away from Soldat to face the witch, “Wanda, you don’t usually care about hearing the rest of us talk about Tony. What changed?”

“Stark hurt every single one of us, okay?” she spat the name, her face screwed in scorn, “We bond by helping each other heal from the wounds he gave us.”

“What’s that got to do with this?” Soldat asked, ticked off.

“I’m just trying to help!”

“Help with what?!” Sam grated, the soothing tone gone, “Fifteen minutes ago this eavesdropping business sounded like something we could just let go by making you take a course on respecting privacy and boundaries. But now? I don’t even know.”

The segue to the ‘grievances’ Tony had caused was not surprising, considering the scope of the conversation, though how it became the root cause of this bungled interrogation still didn’t tie anything up for Natasha.

“I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Wanda, no one’s blaming you for anything.” Steve said, darting a glance at Soldat who rolled his eyes. “Stop it, Buck.”

The younger redhead nodded gratefully and resumed, “We all know how Stark betrayed Steve and still keeps on breaking his heart. He had thrown most of us in _that_ place but, we’ve never heard Bucky say anything other than he and Steve fought him in Siberia. In fact, he never says anything about Stark at all, even when we were in Wakanda. When I heard you two talking, I thought I’d join even if I didn’t understand the language you two were using. I mean, it's not like you're going to continue talking in a language only you two know if a teammate joins you, right? ”

Scott pondered on that for a second, surprising Natasha again when he asked “Why didn’t you?”

Wanda looked at him with a small smile, “Well, I would have if I didn’t remember that Bucky has a tendency pull knives on people when they get too close whenever he’s not…” she gestured vaguely at the man in question, “_thinking_ _clearly_. Like I said, I used my magic to shield any sound I make so he won’t hear. I do know how sharp super soldier hearing is and I don’t want to get stabbed.”

Much to her dismay, instead of the sympathetic response she probably hoped for, Wanda’s answer just exonerated the fury Soldat was holding back.

“What in the goddamn hell are you on about?!” He snarled, teeth gnashing in anger, surprising Wanda and making her cower away from him. “Even motherfucking Reed Richards won’t find any trace of logic in what you just said!”

“Buck! Let her finish what she’s saying.” Steve quickly went to his side and helped Scott to push the older man back away from Wanda.

“Did you hear what she said?” Despite the dull delivery, the rest of them could tell wrath was just waiting for another opportunity to reach the surface again. 

“C’mon, man—”

“_What kind of bullshit are you feeding her?_” Soldat hissed at the blond, slapping Steve’s hands away from him.

“Wanda’s just trying to tell us why she did that. She’s not wrong, she’s being honest.”

“Nothing’s wrong with what she did but this mess is somehow _Stark’s_ fault? He wasn’t even there the other night!”

“There! See? You’re avoiding Steve nowadays and always fighting him when you’re in the same room! And it’s all because of Stark!” Wanda said with a determined but pleading look on her face. “I’m sure he’s done something to make you mad at your _best friend_. Steve needs you and Stark’s trying to break your friendship because he knows you’re an important part of Steve’s life. It’s probably that machine of his!”

“That machine was vetted by the King of Wakanda himself! Princess Shuri modified it to help me! Are you insinuating that they only let us hide in their kingdom because they are trying to manipulate us and that they’re actually Stark’s flying monkeys?”

A horrified Scott rejoined the argument without missing a beat.

“Wanda, do you want the power of the entire Wakanda down on us?” He sounded as though the younger woman had committed all sorts of blasphemy known to man, “You better pray someone who’s close to the King wouldn’t find out you’re thinking that.”

“What? No!” Steve told them off, torn between whom he was going to reprimand first. “Bucky, that’s not what she’s saying. How can you even think that?”

“It’s obviously what she meant, Steve.”

Wanda’s tremulous tone cut in as she addressed Soldat.

“I just thought that if I found out what Stark did to make you act like that then I can help Steve get his friend back! I know Steve loves Stark, I’m willing to accept that because it makes him happy. But Stark’s using you to punish Steve! Don’t you see how you’re siding with him now?” She softened her expression into a more inveigling one, “We’re your teammates, Bucky. We can help you. You don’t have to feel like you can only confide in Natasha or the therapist.” 

Natasha intervened the second Soldat’s face got that distinctly icy patina that those who had faced the Asset would easily recognize. She subtly positioned herself in front of the man, making him focus on her. “You can’t, Soldat.” She shook her head. “We’re going to have the Council after us if you do.”

His jaw clenched then he acquiesced with a nod. Natasha silently squeezed his right arm then turned to Wanda as she let go.

“Wanda.” She called, pinning the witch with an assessing stare, “You’re saying everything’s just because you want to help Steve and Soldat make up?”

“Of course, I wanted them to make up! He’s Steve’s best friend. They’re _brothers_! Natasha, can’t you see? Stark’s trying to cause trouble within our family. We can’t have that! We have to make sure Stark’s going to behave himself when Steve accepts him back into the team.”

“Tony doesn’t even want to be part of the team again. Isn’t that why he joined the New Avengers? I would know, I’ve tried to convince him to come back so many times.”

“_Please_.” Wanda gibed, her lips curling in another sneer, “We all know that he really wants to be back in the team. Stark’s just being petty as usual and if there’s anything that vain man enjoys the most, it’s attention. He likes the attention that the controversy of having his own team affords him. Also, it’s clear he enjoys playing hard to get with Steve too. We’ve lived with him before Natasha, we’ve both seen how he’s always preening around Steve during the time he broke up with that catty, gold-digging, former assistant of his. He’s just targeting Bucky because he knows Steve will get jealous and chase him more.”

“What in the fu—” Sam rubbed his face with both palms whereas Scott pinched his nose bridge with his eyes screwed tightly.

Soldat let out a gruff noise, unimpressed, “So what you’re really saying is that not only am I the weakest link in the team, I’m also incapable of thinking for myself and is easily led around by my dick?”

“No, that’s not it.” Wanda denied, her gaze not landing anywhere near the man’s person, “We really just want to help you.”

“How? By making me join all of you in bitching about Stark while gathering around the campfire? Will there be s’mores and ice cream?”

“We’re a team. We should be looking out for each other.” The younger woman insisted.

The brunet super soldier shook his head, “Steve, are you listening to this?” he diverted his focus to the blond, “Wanda just called Stark a manipulative slut in all but name. Not gonna defend his honor?”

Steve’s face couldn’t decide between indignation and shock, “She didn’t say that.”

“Stevie.”

There was a lace of annoyance and disappointment in the nickname.

“Stop burying your head in the sand. You wouldn’t hesitate to decapitate me for being near Stark, yet here’s Wanda insulting him to your face and you’re okay with it?”

No answer made it past Steve’s lips from Wanda hissing at Soldat, “Don’t twist my words, Bucky. I said I only wanted to find out what makes you mad at Steve so we could help you.”

“Wanda, if I wanted to caterwaul and vent, I’ll just visit my goddamn therapist. I don’t need you for that.” He shifted his weight on one leg and switched to a different topic, “Listen, if you ended up using your magic to dig into our heads, it’s not just Steve who’s gonna end up behind bars. Ross will make sure of that. He’s always had it out for the enhanced. Do you wanna go back to wearing that collar?”

“No! I didn’t use my magic, what don’t you understand?!” she screeched, the wide-eyed ingénue act dropping. “I didn’t dig into your minds!”

Of course, an outraged Steve was there to echo her sentiments.

“I can’t believe you’d say that, Buck. Digging into your heads? We’re not causing trouble, we’re just talking to Nat! Wanda didn’t even do anything!” He said, throwing his hands in the air. “I will never ask that of her!”

“Sorry, I didn’t know that. I just figured that it isn’t a step too far from you putting a tracking device on Natalia because you wanted to monitor her actions without her knowing.”

Soldat could’ve detonated a bomb in the middle of the room and none of them would’ve noticed as every person in the room, again with the exception of Natasha, processed the words.

Sam spun around to face Steve, disappointment and disbelief warring over his features. Scott, on the other hand, looked as though one wrong move and everything would literally explode without any chance of him surviving. Wanda also looked out of the loop and was genuinely confused, for once.

“What is he talking about?” Sam posed the question not just for Steve but also for Natasha and Soldat.

Steve’s jaw clenched, anguish splashed all over his face, but didn’t answer.

Soldat evidently couldn’t care less if he did. The man just turned towards the hallway, intent on leaving. He didn’t spare others another glance, silently beckoning Natasha to follow. She swiped the mission file off her seat and trailed after him.

“Guess we have to save that story for next time. Thanks for the meal.”

The finality in the brunet’s tone had Steve anxiously calling him back.

“Bucky.”

The older man stopped and looked over his shoulder.

“L-look, I’m sorry.” Steve said, stumbling over the words. “For what happened and the things I said.” 

“How about her?” Soldat turned around and motioned at Wanda, whose baffled countenance fell back to being wary. “Is she sorry too or are you apologizing for her?”

“Buck, it was an accident. Wanda didn’t really mean to listen in on you guys.”

“Staying in the hallway and using her powers to avoid detection does not make it an accident, Steve.”

Sam spread both his arms in a grand ‘There you go’ gesture that Soldat acknowledged with a nod. Obviously, the things he found out about Steve and Wanda at this moment miffed the Airman so much that he wasn’t going to back Steve up like he usually would.

“Wanda’s a kid. She makes mistakes. No need to be too harsh with her.”

Soldat’s detached expression slid into full-fledged ire in a blink, “A _kid_? Get your head out of your ass, Stevie. That’s a grown woman behind you. Infantilizing her wouldn’t change that.”

“Still doesn’t warrant any of the bullying she’s receiving from you.”

“_Bullying_? Sonofa—” Soldat replied in varying levels of livid and ludicrous, “Tell me_, did Erskine actually mix a shit ton of crack in your fucking serum or something_? You wanna—”

“Watch your damn mouth!” Steve barked, infuriated by the insult directed at him and the late doctor.

“—preach about bullying when you’re here completely fine with siccing your witch-on-a-leash on unsuspecting people?”

“Quit talking about Wanda like that!”

“Then stop acting like you enabling her all the time didn’t start this bullshit in the first place!”

“She’s still young, she needs guidance. Don’t blame her!”

“What she _needs_ is to act responsibly, Steve. She needs to learn accountability. It’s not gonna happen if you’re always holding her hand, telling her everything she does is okay and bailing her out when it goes to shit! You think I’m being too harsh on her? I didn’t even touch a hair on her head when I found out about that fuckery you pulled on Natalia with the tracker. And since you’re so insistent on treating grown ass women as kids like that’s the only language you know, I’ll play along just this once. _If you don’t want anyone messing with your kid then don’t fuck with mine, asshole_.”

Steve had almost given them all a whiplash with how rapidly he went back to being apologetic. Even looked every bit shattered.

“I know you’re upset, Buck and I’m sorry, but…it’s just…it’s _Tony_.” He said the genius’ name like it explained everything and that it was the only justification needed for his actions.

Green eyes slid to the older soldier. Soldat ran Steve’s words in his head for a moment and Natasha could almost see how exhaustion trickled over his features as his body exonerated a harsh sigh.

“This is gonna sound a lot like the predictable breakup spiel and shit but I don’t really have any other way to say this.”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t you get tired, Steve?”

“Tired?”

“Of _this_!” Soldat spat vehemently, “When it comes to Stark, you’re a goddamn hair-trigger. Stark happened to run into or talk to someone? You go ballistic. Then, when it all becomes clear that the situation isn’t what you think it is, you apologize and expect everything to be swept under the rug.”

“I said I’m sorry.”

“You’re not proving me wrong, pal.”

“That’s not—”

“It’s a sick cycle, Steve. I can’t even tell anymore which one of us is really fucked up—you for doing the same thing over and over in vain or me, who sees what you’re doing but is still expecting a different outcome deep down. Hoping to fuck all that you’ll wake up someday, so damn tired of doing the exact same shit and just stop.”

“What do you want me to do then, Buck?” Steve replied, frenetic and desperate, “Do you even realize how painful for me this entire situation is? I just want to complete our team, _our_ _family_, but every step I take towards that goal, there’s always something in the way!”

“Attacking us every time you get jealous isn’t going to do shit! First, it’s me, then Natalia. Who’s next? Sam? Scott? Clint? Maybe you’d snap _Wanda’s_ spine in half if she ever decides to let go of her misplaced hatred and become friends with Stark? How are you going to have a complete team when everything you’re doing obviously leads to the opposite? You can’t have your cake and eat it too, Steve.” 

“You don’t understand.” The younger man argued, breath hitching in aggravation. “I’m trying to build everything back to the way it was before the Accords. I got you and the team again, but Tony’s out there surrounded by people that are keeping him away from where he belongs.”

Soldat rolled his jaw then stared at Steve, gunmetal eyes locked with ocean blue. When the weight of his prolonged gaze made the blond squirm, he asked almost inaudibly, “From where or _whom_ he belongs?”

Natasha would’ve sworn that she could hear the condensation sliding down their abandoned glasses with how still the air in the room went as they waited with bated breath for Steve’s answer.

“Buck, he’s an Avenger.” The blond uttered lamely after what appeared to be an eternity.

“_Right_.” Soldat murmured wryly, heading to the hallway again.

“Buck—”

“Natalia and I have a mission to prepare for, Steve. We need to go.”

* * *

Soldat decided to hell with taking a cab and asked for Natasha’s keys after they packed for the mission. Steve, thankfully, didn’t try to corner them in their rooms while they were busy with adding things they might need to the bags they always had on the ready.

They were loading their gear into her car—a gray sedan Natasha mostly used for undercover—when Sam came out to the garage to see them.

“Barnes, about earlier—” 

“No.” Soldat shut him down immediately, “_You_ talk to him, Sam. I don’t think I can do it right now.”

“So you’re leaving?”

“We have a mission.”

“Uh-huh.” The younger man intoned, unconvinced, “You didn’t need to leave right away.”

“We do need to leave as soon as possible.”

“Does that mean right now?”

“Yes.” Soldat insisted then with a self-deprecating grin, he said, “Also, I think that if we’re not here for a while maybe Steve will be able to get his screws tightened properly. Same goes for me.”

“You really need to put it like that?”

“Am I wrong?”

Sam’s sigh made the laidback façade slip and showing what was underneath—utterly stumped. Like any good soldier, he shook it off and put his hands on his hips, opting not to go down the lane Soldat invited him to. “You two be careful out there.”

“Same goes for you.”

“It’s _Steve_.” there came Sam’s droll reply, “He’ll come around. He always does.”

Natasha shared a look with Soldat and silently got into the car.

“See ya, Wilson.” Soldat said, sliding into the driver’s seat.

“Don’t get yourself killed, asshole. Make sure you don’t drag Natasha down in the field.”

“I’ll keep him alive so you can beat him up when we come back, Sam.” She threw back at him to his delight.

“I’m counting on it.”

* * *

The drive to one of Natasha’s bolt-holes was mostly quiet. He asked her of a place where they could lay low for a while that the others, even Clint, didn’t know about before they leave for the mission tomorrow. For someone who’d possibly hadn’t driven for seven decades, he was doing a pretty good job. Then again, she thought, the other fossil knew how to steal a car, so this shouldn’t come off as a surprise.

“You’re worried.”

“With everything that’s going on, worried is my default setting, Natalia.”

“Touché. I mean, is there something new that worries you?”

“What Wanda said earlier about Stark.”

“Which one?”

Soldat bit his lower lip almost to the point of bleeding before answering, “That thing she said about making sure he behaves.”

Dread thrummed through her system, “You don’t mean…?”

“I don’t know, but I hope to God that Stark wouldn’t run into her while we’re away. Or if he did, he had someone else with him, maybe Danvers or Jones.”

“Not Vision? He can stop her.”

“No. Vision will try to reason with her, bless him, but we know that when it comes to Stark, Steve’s pet witch ignores reason.”

"True." she said. They fell back into silence after.

Natasha was preoccupied with how that last conversation with everyone went when something poked at her concentration. It nagged at her when she heard it but her training enabled her to push it away from her mind until the coast was clear.

Her eyes flicked from the road to the man beside her, calculating how to open the subject then decided to go balls to the wall.

“Your kid?” she asked softly.

“Hm?” Soldat kept his eyes on the road even as Natasha turned slightly in her seat to face him.

“Your kid. Back there, while arguing with Steve, you called me your kid.”

The synthetic leather that covered the steering wheel creaked a bit as Soldat’s fingers tightened around it.

“Ah…that.”

“Just find it a bit strange.” She put forth, curling a lock of her hair behind one ear. “Considering we—”

“Drop it.”

She didn’t let the warning in his tone stop her though, “I’m still undecided if we’re more like Moll Flanders or The Children of Húrin.”

She watched the ticking of his jaw and the muscles in his throat work as he swallowed.

“Natalia, shut the hell up before I kick you out of the car.” He replied bitingly.

What most people didn’t know was that Natasha did have a stubborn streak and it was showing itself right at that moment, “I’m leaning towards Moll Flanders. There are bits of similarities.”

Soldat briefly glared at her but ultimately resigned himself to not getting out of the conversation while they were on the road.

“The thieving and conning parts, sure, but last time I checked you're not married and Moll unknowingly hooked up with her brother, not her father.”

Natasha couldn’t help but feel grateful that he had skipped the most glaring difference between her and Moll—children.

“Niёnor got together with her brother too.”

“Got me there.” Soldat conceded, eyes scanning the road, “If we go by the imprisoned and memories getting wiped out route, I’d say The Children of Húrin but it’s a toss-up if I’m Niёnor or Turambar.”

“So, we’re more Moll then?” She inquired instead, burying the longing that thoughts of children would wake in her. “Though we could get away with saying we’re a mix of the two.”

“I think you’re more likely to see parallels with Moll. Me? I’d like to think Children but that would be giving myself too much credit. Your idea about how the recent events make my life look like a trashy fanfic is more appropriate. Especially with this dumbass author trying to pepper it with many cliffhangers as if that makes their storytelling any better. Example being Wanda apparently listening in on us the other night without us knowing.”

Natasha mentally gave him a pat on the shoulder for putting effort to make light of the topic, in spite of the fact that he didn’t really enjoy talking about that particular part of their history. She glanced up front and saw that they were already near the apartment building.

In a bout of playfulness, Natasha looked at him from under her lashes and a sly smile on her lips when she remembered something else he told her before.

“You’re right. Moll Flanders is more me than you. I’m not disagreeing with your points regarding the fanfic and The Children of Húrin but I think Tony actually hit the jackpot with Manchurian Candidate—oof!”

The dash would have been _too_ acquainted with her face had she not placed a hand on it to steady herself when Soldat suddenly hit the brakes.

“We’re here.” He told her, face blander than white bread, before parking the car.

“You did that on purpose.” She frowned at him, pushing back some of her hair that flew over her eyes.

“You were yapping too much we nearly missed our stop.”

“You know I’m right.” She shot back, removing her seatbelt.

Soldat eyed the mirrors for a bit to check again for any tails. Satisfied, he opened the trunk and got out of the car. “Move your ass, _Natulya_. I’m not carrying your bags for you.”

“What happened to treating ladies right?” she carped as she closed the car door.

He tossed one of her bags at her. “Didn’t you hear? Chivalry is dead.”

* * *

Upon entering the building, Soldat carefully spotted possible escape routes as she led him to the stairs. The corridor was empty and only the sound heard, apart from their conversation, was of them trudging up the steps. It was still middle of the day and most of Natasha’s neighbors were out so there was no risk of bumping into anyone else that might actually recognize them. She almost didn’t expect the surprise on the soldier’s face when she told him that her apartment was on the sixth floor of the building, at the end of the hall.

“A walk-up?”

“Makes for good exercise.” Natasha reasoned, twisting a little to gesture to her butt, “Booty boot camp could never.”

Soldat rolled his eyes, “Just thought you’d be in a condo or a brownstone.”

“Why? Old bones got too pampered with the elevators?”

“You’re one to talk. Before the Compound, didn’t you live in that tall ass building with—” he stopped and squinched up his eyes at her, “Fuck you.”

“What did I say?” she teased as he grumbled under his breath. 

He didn’t respond to her ribbing even after they got into her apartment and closed the door behind them. Soldat immediately gravitated towards her sofa after putting his bags on the living area’s floor.

“Want something to drink, Soldat?”she offered, striding into her kitchen after setting her own bags down the coffee table.

“Water’s fine.” 

Natasha was rifling through her fridge for bottled water when he spoke again.

“How’d you get this place?”

She glanced at him for a moment and found him getting cozy with her favorite afghan and the throw pillows, “Shoes off my couch, you gannet.”

“Gannet, Natalia? So damn rude.” The man reluctantly sat back up and unlaced his boots, setting them on floor by the sofa.

Natasha could tell he was thinking of putting them on the coffee table just to spite her but decided against it when he saw the knife block two feet away from her on the counter. She waited until he had gone back to lounging on her couch before continuing her response to his question.

“Anyways, I got the place through an acquaintance. It’s their sister’s actually. The sister was moving away and it’s up for grabs, so I took it. I wanted some place I could be left alone for a while.”

“In Hell’s Kitchen?”

“No one would guess that I’d hang out here.” She plugged the fridge into the socket after checking that all the food stored inside was still safe for consumption. Then again, she could guess that it wouldn’t really affect either of them if it wasn’t. She sauntered over to the living area and placed two bottles on the table. “The others are more likely to think that I hide in a cottage or farm somewhere like Clint. If I stay in the city, they’d say it wouldn’t be anywhere near another team and definitely nowhere near _The_ _Defenders_. This is Daredevil’s stomping grounds and it’s not really a secret that Jessica Jones hates our guts.”

He let out a gruff chuckle at the mention of the churlish private investigator, “No Miss Congeniality that one. Whenever I see her, I can almost feel my bones cracking because she’s obviously thinking about pulverizing them with her bare hands.”

Natasha settled beside him on the sofa, slipping off her own boots and tucking her feet beneath her legs. “That’s possible. Jones hates us a lot but Wanda and Steve are at the top of her shit list. It’s kinda amusing if we think about how she hates us more than Rhodes probably does and the guy is Tony’s best friend. If I didn’t know she’s married to Luke Cage and that they already have a kid, I’d say she’s infatuated with Tony.”

This time, the discussion circling back to the billionaire wasn’t met with the same crabby reaction on their way up to the apartment.

“Loud and wrong, Natalia.”

“Hn?”

“If there’s anyone in the entire world who hated us with the exception of Stark, it’s Rhodes.”

“Did something happen?”

He barked a quick laugh, “When did it not?” Soldat slumped back on the throw pillows with an air of being more ancient than his hundred years. 

“Rhodes read you the riot act?”

“Yeah.” He replied, snagging Natasha’s attention. That was new.

“When did that happen?” she knew he caught the implied ‘why didn’t you tell me sooner?’ judging by the way his lips quirked.

“Charity event, in the men’s room. He pointed a gun directly to my face too. Frankly, I’m actually very impressed the Colonel snuck a gun into the venue.”

“Bringing a gun somewhere we’re not supposed to? We do that all the time.”

“But it’s expected of us, not of him.”

“War Machine just threatened to plant a bullet in your head weeks ago, yet here you are telling me about it and sounding like he named his first born son after you instead.”

The quirk of his lips became a sardonic grin. “Well, because of recent events, I’m actually the one with a kid who’s named after him.” 

She laughed. “Ah, yes. The twins. Speaking of, how did the meeting go?”

“How do _you_ think it went?”

Natasha wet her lips, “Okay, point taken.”

Just like it had been back at the Compound, the atmosphere seemed to follow the state of the man’s moods without him meaning to, becoming somber in time with his expression. Natasha almost had to wonder if it was also because of the serum since Steve was the same.

“Soldat?”

“Do you know the real reason why I recommended you for the mission, Natalia?” he said, “It’s because I knew that Steve without a doubt would go after you first the moment he finds out about the kids.”

The small bundle of agita in her gut unraveled. She smiled at him, “Soldat. He already knew about them because I told him.”

“You did?”

“Yes. Before you arrived, Steve set up that little lunch in the common room to covertly wring information out of me using Wanda.”

“Fuck.” Soldat said, stopping himself from putting his metal fist through the table, “Did she—”

“She didn’t—well, she couldn’t use her magic to see what’s in my head, not with Sam and Scott around. So, Steve had to settle for the next best thing. Use Wanda’s other ability which is to sense emotions and thoughts. She didn’t have to actively use her magic for that because it’s more like a sixth sense, if you will. And from what I’ve seen so far, it’s more of a by-product of how she got her powers.”

The tension from his shoulders lessened a fraction as he caught on, “Conditioning the students to suppress thoughts and emotions until it’s as instinctual as breathing is what makes the Red Room a cut above the rest when it came to producing spies.”

“Yeah and also, Fury had to commission a special lie detector because I beat all the ones SHIELD had in its arsenal when I defected.” She added, relaxing back into couch, “While it’s true lying to someone like Wanda, who can sense emotions and thoughts would be difficult, it doesn’t mean it’s not possible. She’s powerful, but she’s no Loki.”

“Arrogance is a first class ticket to getting killed, Natalia. Just ‘cause you managed to outwit a god once, it doesn’t mean you’re above everybody.” He said, grabbing the water bottle and finishing half its contents. “You look nice with big hair, not a big head.”

“I don’t mean it like that, Soldat.” She countered, “It’s merely observation. Living with both Steve and Wanda made it easier to notice that the way their minds work is very similar. If they get distracted enough, it would be hard for them focus on anything else.”

“That’s true.”

“With the trickster, we could lock him up in The Raft, give him the third degree and be rest assured that there will be news that he’s running around causing chaos in a different country as well as sitting in some café, drinking a macchiato while plotting to kill Thor for kicks because he’s bored. To tell you the truth, if Loki himself hadn’t been too confident back then and didn’t underestimate this _mewling quim_ that interrogated him—I think I wouldn’t have gotten him to reveal his plan to unleash the Hulk in the helicarrier. Loki’s arrogance was what did him in but he was quick to adapt to any wrench thrown in his plans. That’s the difference. Wanda’s mental state seemed to affect the efficiency of her magic and we both know she’s not the most strong minded individual out there. If something breaks her concentration, it will take her a while to get it back and that causes her powers to be unstable.”

“Hence giving up the information they needed right from the start. To distract them because they wouldn’t be expecting it.”

Natasha was always one of those who gave credit where it was due, so she said, “Sam and Scott’s presence helped too. When Wanda slipped and accidentally said that she heard us, she and Steve didn’t expect them to chew her out. They were too used to those two going along with what Steve says. That hiccup added to the pressure of failing to cover her slip-up and Wanda cracked. With his little princess upset and distracted, that meant Steve would be distracted too. He ended up asking general questions and made it easy to tell them the truth like he wanted, but nothing specific. Therefore, technically, I didn’t lie. Nothing for Wanda to detect.”

Soldat suddenly stood up, striding over to her kitchen.

“Soldat?”

He rummaged through her cabinets and found a glass and an unopened bottle of whiskey.

He leaned against her counter after he poured himself two fingers and drank some of it. “I appreciate that you did your best to hide the kids from Steve but it’s not gonna be long before he finds out. Fuck, maybe he already does. That’s why I wanted to get you out of the Compound today.”

Natalia tensed, almost getting up from the couch, “What? How?”

* * *

“What? How?”

“_Russell Alcocer._” James answered gravely, the glass in his hand nearly cracking. He put it down. “He was there at the meeting.”

Her eyes widened.

“Of course. It would make sense for him to be there because he’s part of the protection program. The twins were found during the Fantastic Four’s mission.”

“He released information on Harley Keener to Steve. Who’s to say he wouldn’t tell Steve about the twins?” James said, taking the bottle and another glass in his other hand along with him when he returned beside her. He chuckled with all the humor of a cadaver. “Fuck you, Stevie. Fuck you to hell and back.”

Natalia took the other glass, poured some whiskey and shooting it back, though she let herself bask in the burn for a bit, and asked, “Where are they now?”

“They’re still with the Fantastic Four. That’s going to change after a while. But for now, I don’t think Steve will do something about that.”

“Because it’s not just the Accords Council that will be all over it. That buys us some time to warn Tony.”

The flippant conclusion was a hot poker gouging every single one of James’ nerve cells and had his wrath through the roof.

“And that’s where the senator friends you two made will come in.” He sing-songed with enough acid to melt steel. The switch in his attitude had her forehead creasing. “Steve played you for a fool, Natalia.”

“Solda—”

“How do you think will they help Steve out with getting close to Stark and the kids now? I’ll give you a clue, you helped Steve accomplish the first step.”

“The inter-team meetings…”

James sliced her with a contemptuous glare, “Thanks to your help, we got our monthly inter-team meetings with the New Avengers. Now that we’re looking at it, it was really just Steve’s way of testing how much influence they have. Boy, did they deliver. Being in Captain America’s corner will guarantee them what they wanted, so why not return the favor?”

“They couldn’t possibly support Steve’s plan and put their careers on the line.” The skepticism on her face had him shaking his head. “The whole world will draw blood for Tony.”

“_Christ_, I don’t know what’s with everybody thinking of Steve as some pure, lost man that has no clue how society worked. Back in the day, he was _sickly_ not stupid. You think they won’t support him? C’mon Natalia, you know they already are putting their careers on the line for Steve. You were there when Steve talked to those two. You’re the one selling lies for him. Obviously, they wouldn’t know the whole thing. Did you actually tell them about Steve’s real goal of being a permanent fixture in Stark’s bed? I overheard some people on that charity event we attended with the New Avengers that those two are gearing for the elections. If you’re a politician, wouldn’t you agree that it’s going to be great for your aspirations if you had a hand in uniting all the Avengers?”

It was her turn, to shake her head, “We can’t endorse candidates—”

“Who said anything about endorsing? Steve only needed to have a few ‘accidental’, pleasant run-ins with them. Pictures and small talk that will make it to the news when the election arrives. It doesn’t matter if they just talked about the weather or how many mistresses the senators are hiding from their wives. Seeing them all together will be enough for people to think Steve’s supporting those two. The Accords can’t do anything about that since Steve didn’t exactly go out of his way to tell people to vote for them.”

“That’s not a solid plan, Soldat.”

“You know how the media works nowadays, Natalia. I only talked to Stark for _two fucking minutes_, all of a sudden everybody started acting like I went down on one knee and asked him to marry me. Stark was yelling at me the entire time and people said it’s _sexual tension_. There are still people who look up to Captain America despite the Civil War. Even if our image isn’t as pristine as the New Avengers at the moment, the fact that he is now working with the Accords helped him regain some of the admiration he lost.”

“He’s going to use the public opinion to sway the Council.”

“The prodigal son returns.” James smirked caustically, “We both know that the masses eat up stories like that. The Merchant of Death turned his life around and became the hero Iron Man, so why can’t the rogue soldier go back to being Captain America? They didn’t question why Stark sold the Compound to the Council to house us, helped the Winter Soldier get acquitted and he didn’t contest our return. So why would the public react negatively if Captain America is working to unite our teams?”

“If we included the joint missions, all of it made it look like Tony’s open to reconciliation but wanted to lessen the hurts first.” Natalia supplied unsteadily.

“The Council’s PR also worked hard to keep any fights out of the media. Us and the New Avengers becoming a single team falls in line with the Council’s reminder to show a united front. No one would bat an eye, in fact they might even celebrate. Steve’s one big happy family will come true. Think about it, the senators got enough sway to hand inter-team meetings to Steve. Pulling strings to get a decision for there to be just one Avenger team isn’t going to be surprising.”

“When that happens Tony wouldn’t get away.” she whispered, suddenly the frightened child that valiantly kept herself from wilting under Madame B’s frigid glare.

He couldn’t hear her though, consumed by self-loathing, “I admit, I should’ve fucking seen this coming. I didn’t realize how he set all this up until I saw Alcocer in the meeting. We went ass backwards with this, Natalia. We treated this like a game of cat and mouse. Stark would, perhaps, be all scientist with this or play this like chess, fuck if I know…but, Steve. Steve treated this like a _goddamn baseball game_. He had the bases loaded before for a fucking grand slam.”

Natalia’s face turned miserable the more he spoke.

“I did some digging of my own and found out that Alcocer is related to one of them. His mother is a second cousin once removed. That’s why he’s in on this. If Steve gets what he wants and those two get elected, a little nepotism would lift him up.”

“Steve used the fact that I wanted to protect Tony.”

Nothing would have stymied the disdain that colored his words at that.

“_Natka_, I am very fond of you, but let’s _not_. You know damn well that your skillset is not the only reason Steve picked you. He could’ve used Barton or Sam.”

Natalia’s jaw clenched and because the asshole in him relished having someone share some of the wounds he obtained from Stark’s barb laden tongue earlier, he cooed.

“Sam would have enough contacts that could lead Steve to people who can help him. Barton can get the job done. The only thing is that Sam would chicken out and the idea of better equipment is not enough to make Barton work hard to get Stark back on the team. You, dear _Natashka_, part of you may have wanted to protect Stark, but in reality, you just liked Steve better because he’s malleable. You can twist him to your liking easier than Stark. Isn’t that one of the _actual_ reasons you switched sides back in Germany apart from being loyal to Barton?” He said silkily, watching her through lidded eyes, “Deep down you still can’t help being petty. You wanted Steve near Stark to get back at him but not near enough that if something happens you wouldn’t be able to wash your hands off.”

The green of her eyes became darker and the hand clutching her glass went tighter.

“I’ve seen enough to know that Stark had a way of stepping on someone’s toes with enough force to break bones even if he didn’t mean to. The wound will heal but the scar’s still there and the foot’s not gonna work like before. You and Stark may get along well for the most part but you’re still angry with him for not letting you manipulate him. And most importantly, you’re thinking that if Stark didn’t rope him into creating Ultron, you and Banner would be happily living your life together somewhere.”

Her knuckles went white, “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to stop fucking hiding behind the excuse of only wanting to protect Stark!” He snarled, the glass in his flesh hand finally breaking. They did not take their eyes away from the other, even when the liquor and shards scattered all over their laps as well as on the floor. “You’re not doing this for him, you’re doing this for yourself! You want to lessen the weight on your conscience by saying you want to protect him, but this is just you finally seeing the your choices you made back then were wrong and that you wanted to have it easy again—”

The glass in Natalia’s hand didn’t get to land on his face when his hand—still damp from the whiskey—caught her wrist, inches away. “You better think about what that’s gonna cost you.”

Her beauteous face was, uncharacteristically scrunched in fury as she snatched her hand back. “Don’t you dare talk about Bruce, _Barnes_. I won’t argue about you throwing my being a hypocrite into my face but don’t act as if you’re not doing the same thing. You’re not bending over backwards because you really wanted to help Tony and yourself heal. You’re doing this because it will keep this cycle of self-hatred you have running. You just wanted to use him and his forgiveness as an excuse to tell yourself again and again that you’re back to being the good man you once were.”

“Isn’t Stark just the treasure trove of wisdom?” he jeered, words dipped in poison. “He told me that I’m the same as Steve and now, you’re here telling me that too. You, me and Steve; we’re a merry little band of filthy fucking liars, hypocrites and backstabbers.”

Natalia didn’t say anything else because she looks like she’d much rather have a go at bashing her glass on his head again.

“Surely you’ve figured it out? Steve didn’t just pick you for your pretty lies. Your senator friends didn’t really have to be the one to put pressure on the Council to unite the teams, they can just pull some strings, call in a favor and voila, they could have that proposal land on someone’s table. Waiting to be brought up on the next Council meeting. Steve brought you in as a safety measure too, in case anyone found out about him meeting them. He could pass it off as the Avengers being asked to escort them or something. If Steve succeeded, there’s no way Stark will let you back into his fold, the same thing will happen if Steve failed. You’ve betrayed Stark too many times for him to let you just waltz back into his life.”

“I know Tony’s not going to trust me anymore when I made the choice to join you all on the run.”

“And yet you’re hoping that he’d find it in his heart to give you another chance. Maybe, he will someday, but I don’t think he will be inclined to save you at this moment. You’re Steve’s scapegoat. You said it yourself, the words of a known double agent against Captain America. The politicians can move around this with plausible deniability. You didn’t tell them anything about Steve’s actual plan. All they know is that they’re just helping out the Council to build a bridge between our teams. If you make this public like with HYDRA, they could pin you down as being out of your mind_. Captain America is madly in love with Tony Stark so he manipulated politicians to help him win Iron Man’s heart_. Don’t sound like something anyone would take seriously, does it?”

“Tony’s got his hands on evidence, I think I’ll be alright.” She demurred.

The tiny smile she had died when he sniffed, “The file on the Keener kid wouldn’t be much use if Alcocer backed him up by saying Steve wanted to recruit the kid into the protection program since Stark didn’t bother to. Even if that happened before the Accords, the Council made it clear that they wanted the kids protected in case some asshole lackey who got away try to get to them again. That omission makes Stark look bad and Steve would come out looking like the golden boy. Steve just needed to have a copy of the reports you handed to SHIELD when Fury sent you out to investigate about the Mandarin case. You wrote that you found out that Stark had a child sidekick then. If they compared that with Stark’s own reports of the incident, it will make Steve’s excuse check out.”

“It’s the reports he wanted that’s why he approached Alcocer specifically.”

“He is a former SHIELD agent that's verified to not have any ties with HYDRA. You think he couldn’t get clearance to access the backups that were salvaged from the data dump? Steve knew that Alcocer will suspect something if he asked for your reports right away and chose to keep that in the back burner as counterevidence. The fact he’s related to one of the senators is just gravy.”

“And what about you?”

“I said we went ass backwards with this and I’m kicking myself for it. Working with me had put you at even more disadvantage because I’m not only a former HYDRA agent, forced but one nevertheless, I’m also being monitored for my mental state. We couldn’t use the HYDRA operative excuse on Wanda because she’s not actively involved in Steve’s schemes unlike you. That’s not even considering that I used to train you before you defected to the US. If Steve mentions that, it’s going to blow the credibility of the evidence we gave to Stark to smithereens, because it’s going to look like I tampered with them to cover for you.”

Natalia’s expression deadened further, “You said that Tony won’t save me.”

He crushed the small twinge of pity that stirred in his chest, “I told you, you’ve betrayed him too many times for him to just swoop in and save you. This is possibly the worst one. If everything does get out in the open, I’m sure he’d fight Steve off but will he lend you a helping hand when either way he turned, he’d find out that he became a bargaining chip? To him, this is like Stane and the Ten Rings all over again. And we both know how he dealt with them.”

Her sharp exhale came out sounding like a wheeze when he continued.

“Stark’s caught in the middle of a business transaction. If the senators give Stark to Steve and they’ll get a boost to get that seat they wanted. Funny enough, it’s not far off from your original plan. In a roundabout way, you’ve achieved your original goal of _whoring_ Stark out to save your own ass.”

Natalia flinched but sunk back into the throw pillows like him. Finally letting her guard down to show how exhausted and drained she was too. “We just made everything worse, huh?”

He gently tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. “I heard that the road to Hell’s paved with good intentions.”

She nodded and quietly acknowledging that as the apology he meant it to be.

“Stark really had my number there when he said I’m a hypocrite. I’m damn near to wringing your neck because of the things you did when I’m the one who almost single-handedly started all this shit.”

“That’s cause you’re a bastard, Soldat. To be honest, I still want to break my glass on your face.” She jerked her thumb at the Blue Label on the table, “That too.”

James chuckled.

He would later wonder about how easy it was for them to slip in and out of being angry with each other, like they weren’t ready to slit the other’s throat seconds ago. It wasn’t like with Steve nowadays, where he knew the anger just festers underneath their chests even if they laughed the fight off afterwards.

“Sometimes I ask myself if I remember Howard’s actual last words correctly. Did he really ask me to help his wife or was he cursing my existence and he vowed that his son will avenge them?”

“Tony helped you be free of the triggers.”

“Didn’t you say that he is a futurist? He let T’challa use BARF to remove my triggers so I wouldn’t be a problem in the future. He didn’t want another Zemo popping out of nowhere. That’s not forgiveness. What I did to his parents is already too much of a grand thing for him to forgive. After that, Siberia…”

“It keeps on piling up with no intention of stopping anytime soon.”

He thanked whatever was out there that Natalia had the wherewithal not to give him the old chestnut that it wasn’t his fault.

_Because there’s only one person you want to hear that from._

He bit the inside of his cheek, pushing that notion away.

“Yeah, throw in that Steve, his childhood hero and friend, had fucked him over to save me? The chances of sorting things between us just dropped to zero. Then, Steve just had to become so obsessed—I’m sorry, _in love_ with him to the point of madness. I’m Steve’s best friend, which means in Stark’s world, I’m on the sidelines cheering for their epic coming toge—” He clicked his tongue, “Long story short, Steve’s shoving those chances in a basket filled with red and gold confetti and dropping it straight into the depths of Hell.”

“Steve wants to have the happily ever after and the big, perfect family that slipped from his fingers when he crashed into the Antarctic.”

They all have heard the blond tell them story after story of how he was going to build his family with Stark. That he wanted Spider-man, the Harley kid and Wanda as their children.

Spider-man and the Keener kid he could understand, but _Wanda_?

Steve would actually let her be around children connected to Stark?

* * *

_The tortures, the conditioning, the chair, the arm…the ice._

The Winter Soldier was created to lay the groundwork of eliminating those who had the power to oppose HYDRA. He was meant to be discarded the moment Project Insight had pushed through.

Why would they bother keeping the gun if they had a tank they could use to take down the dissention all at once?

The Scarlet Witch, on the other hand…

James may not have met her while he was under HYDRA, carted from one base to another but, even thousands of miles away, his handlers had heard of Baron von Strucker’s precious twins. Especially, his so-called miracle. 

He also remembered overhearing handlers discuss how Strucker put word out that he had the assets that would keep HYDRA’s new world order should Insight fail.

_Order through pain._

The woman was HYDRA’s creed made flesh.

While Pietro’s abilities would have had its uses, it was obvious that his sister would be the favored one. He was her shield and leash. Pietro was meant to protect her and at the same time, a way to control his sister. Wanda couldn’t be contained without him, making him indispensable. HYDRA’s repertoire of fuckery included exploiting bonds people have, the twins without doubt had a strong one.

Apart from the natural bond that being siblings gave them, just hearing bits and pieces of their life together from Wanda herself, would give anyone an idea that the twins may have also been codependent.

Now, Pietro was gone and Wanda needed that security and stability back.

Barton may have offered some of that, but he couldn’t possibly live his life around her because his family would always take precedence—enter Steve. It didn’t take a genius brain why Wanda latched on to the man and vice versa. She got both of what she wanted in spades with Steve taking her under his wing. At the same time, she was also giving him the satisfaction of letting him act the dependable, adoring father he fancied himself would be one day.

_He’ll be a father_, snickered by a sly voice in his head and accompanied by images of two pairs of blue eyes, cherubic cheeks and chubby hands. 

_To Stark’s children._

_To **your**—_

No.

* * *

James slammed the lid on that thought and he closed his eyes. Opening them moments later, he found Natalia staring intently at him.

“You’re confusing, Soldat.” That was the only thing she offered and James could tell she knew he wouldn’t want to talk about why spaced out mid conversation.

“Confusing? Coming from you, I’m not sure taking that as a compliment will be a wise choice.”

“From me, it kinda is—since spies are supposed to be a step ahead of everybody in the room. From Tony? No.” she grabbed one of the water bottles, opening it and took a swig, “If there’s anything Tony never really liked, it’s confusing.”

“I just said that Stark hates anything to do with me, so that doesn’t tell me anything new.”

“It does actually.”

“Oh?” he said, sounding amused.

“At first, I couldn’t tell if you’re seeing it yourself.” Natalia’s half-grin was abrading, “but now, I’m sure you don’t.”

“See what?”

“That you’re acting like Steve…_but worse.”_

“Did you miss the part where I said Stark told me that already?”

“I know your baby mama said it many times before—,” She fiddled with the water bottle for a while then set it on the table.

He shifted in his seat, oddly embarrassed, “Stop calling him that.”

“—but it’s not the only thing that makes you more dangerous than Steve in his eyes. To other people it looks like you’re determined to make sure Steve wouldn’t be able to hurt Tony, but to him, you’re doing the same thing Steve does. The only difference being, you have much subtler and more effective methods. Also, Tony knows what Steve’s endgame is or parts of it—get Tony back into the team and have the leadership out of Rhodes’ hands. With you? He has no clue. You keep pushing his boundaries then go cold when he tells you off before finding a way to go around new walls he set up. You say you just wanted to make things okay between you two but you also do things that make him not want to even consider it. Someone who really wanted to be forgiven wouldn’t be like this and he doesn’t know what’s your real goal. Let’s say he had forgiven you, what then? Because to him it wouldn’t be just that. Tony believes that it’s not going to end there. That makes you worse than Steve. Tony can’t figure you out and it’s scaring him.”

James couldn’t help the morose chuckle that left him.

“You know, that’s funny because he’s scaring me too.”

“Soldat…”

He took Natalia’s glass, shooting her unfinished drink back.

“After the meeting, I got to talk to him alone. As usual, it went _ugly_. But towards the end, I was scared. I didn’t know if it was because I was afraid that he’d actually been thinking something like that.”

“Thinking about what?”

“I’m not even entirely sure he meant it or if I actually got what he meant. It’s probably just to kick me where it hurts the most. Bastard’s spiteful enough for that.” He looked at drop of liquor at the bottom of the glass.

_“I think we both know what you can do, Barnes.” _

“What did Tony say?”

He took a deep breath, “He didn’t really say anything but implied he wanted Steve dead.”

Natalia’s lips formed a firm line.

“The most fucked up part here is that it’s not even what I’m afraid of, Natalia. I know one day if Steve got too out of control, Stark would have no choice but to get rid of him.”

“Then what’s the matter?”

“We never wanted to be killers, Natalia. I killed back in the war because I had to. I killed for HYDRA because they made me, same as you killing for the KGB. Now, we’re still killing because it had to be done. We can’t just sit around doing nothing while people die when we know there are things we could do to help.”

“We have the choice to stop but even if we do want to, the fight is always following us.”

“It just won’t stop but even after getting my hands bloody so many times, it never crossed my mind to _actually choose_ to kill.”

“You hated the fact that Tony would ask it of you but what scares you the most is to realize it.”

A lifeless curl perched on the corner of his lips.

“It’s terrifying to know that there’s a large part of me that would’ve told him… as you wish.”

* * *

_Four hours earlier…_

“Yay!” Luke cheered while Dani clapped her hands. She finally kept her building blocks from toppling over. The two of them were playing on the floor while Jessica was on the couch folding their daughter’s blankets when firm knocks had the adults staring at the door.

Jessica set the laundry aside and went to check who it was. She peered into the peephole and was confused to find Matt Murdock standing outside. He and Danny usually call first before dropping by.

“Jess, who is it?” Luke asked, Dani now sitting on his shoulders and patting his shaved head.

“It’s Matt.” She replied, opening the door.

“Uh, hi.” Matt greeted, “Sorry to come here unannounced.”

“That’s fine, come in.” Jessica said, “Want me to hang your coat?”

“Ah, yeah, thanks.” He placed the padded legal envelope he had with him on the shoe rack near the door and removed his coat, handing it over to her.

“Why don’t you sit down, I’ll get you something to drink.”

“That would be great.” Matt said, grabbing the envelope and moved to the sofa. “Hi, Dani.” he crooned as he sat down, earning him giggles from the little girl.

Luke moved his daughter to sit on his lap, “Aren’t you supposed to be at your office right now?”

“Well, this was delivered there and when Foggy told me the name, I thought I’d clock out early. By the feel of it, I’d say it’s some confidential files.” He handed the envelope to Luke.

It was a priority express mail, which intrigued the bigger man more. He saw the sender’s name and stopped, brows meeting with each other. A second later, he nearly let out a curse, “Motha—Is this who I think it is?”

“I know. That’s for Jess, actually. The guy obviously didn’t know where you two live that’s why it was sent to my office instead.”

Jessica strode into the living room and gave the glass of orange juice to Matt. “What is it?”

“That’s what we wanna know.” Luke said grimly, passing the envelope to her.

Jessica nearly ripped it in half when she saw it. The mail was sent under an alias but it was meant to be obvious to the receiver whom it actually was from.

_William G. Reiner _

“Why would the Winter Soldier be sending you classified files, Jess?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I do have a thing for making Bucky appear out of nowhere.
> 
> Also...Nope. Nope. Nope. I'm sorry, but I don't want to hear it. I know someone will say Nat should be Niёnor because she threw herself off a cliff too. We do not respect Endgame nor Infinity War in this house. 😂😂😂
> 
> Bucky lambastes how I handle his life in this fic...  
Me: sHOOK  
Bucky: *inserts Ms. Janet Jackson 'It's true tho' meme.*  
Me: *smiles* Okay. I see you want to suffer.
> 
> Thank you for reading and keep safe!

**Author's Note:**

> I got lazy with the "Tweets" sorry. xD


End file.
